Sing
by Larissa Fae
Summary: Post-TDK, AU, Joker/Rachel, sequel to Speak. After nearly two years of marriage, Rachel's ready for kids, but murders in the area are giving Jack second thoughts, especially as they seem to be targeting his past as the Joker.
1. Chapter 1

_There is this thing that's like touching except you don't touch.  
Back in the day it just went without saying at all.  
All the world's history gradually dying of shock.  
There is thing that's like talking except you don't talk.  
You sing.  
You . . . sing._

_~The Dresden Dolls~_

_"Sing"_

The early morning sun was just peeking through the heavy fog when the car pulled up the drive, tires crunching on the white gravel. The car door shut, then heavy shoes thunked on the steps up to the porch. The figure laying face-down on the porch swing barely twitched, bare back covered with long, thin red welts. There was a long-necked bottle still held loosely in one hand, and seven or eight others were scattered around him. They clinked as they were toed out of the way, then the driver cleared his throat. There was a faint moan from the sleeping man, and another, more insistent cough.

The man's arm twitched, knocking a few more bottles over, then he turned his face to the side and made a half-hearted effort to bring the bottle he grasped to his lips, the swing swaying slightly as he finally managed to make contact with the glass. His throat worked as he drank, then squinted blearily up at the men that stood over him.

"Jack Dawes?"

"Unh." He sniffed and wiped the back of his hand across his lips as he sat up, then yawned and scratched at his chest. "Who're you?" His voice was low and gravely from sleep, and he winced and let out a soft hiss as his nails dragged over a large, circular bruise surrounding his right nipple.

"Are those teeth marks, Mr. Dawes?"

Jack cleared his throat and winced again, this time a pleased smirk crossing his deformed features. "Yeah," he coughed. "Last night was a good night." He chuckled, quite pleased, then rubbed at his face before looking up at the men again. "Who're you?" His bottle dangled carelessly from his hand, but his fingers were curled around it in a manner that said he could quite easily turn his beverage into a weapon.

"Detective Mark Daniels, Mr. Dawes, and this is my partner, Detective Tim Grady. Fair Oaks PD. We'd like to ask you a few questions." He flipped his badge and toed one of the bottles, and for a moment the only sound was the clink as it rolled into another one. "Lots of bottles."

Jack flipped his drink around to show the label as he took another gulp, making a face. "Root beer. Ugh. _Wam _root beer." He burped slightly and then heaved himself out of the swing, bare feet slapping on the porch as he weaved toward the screen door. He bumped into the small table by the swing and cursed under his breath, then leaned his shoulder against the door and banged on it. "Rachel!" he called. There was silence inside. He banged again, harder. "_Racheeeeeel_! Lemme in!"

"Go _away_!" she finally yelled back.

"I'm sorry!" Jack called in return. He was grinning from ear to ear. "Lemme in, sweetheart!"

"Piss off!"

He turned around, pressing his back to the screen as he shook with silent laughter. The detectives watched him with raised eyebrows. "Baby, you know I love you! I _need_ you, darlin'!"

"Mr. Dawes ---"

"Go to Hell, Jack!"

"Mr. Dawes, this won't take very long at all."

Daniels was ignored as Jack rattled the door with another swig of his warm root beer. "At least let the nice detectives in?" Silence. "Honey?"

There were hurried footsteps and then Rachel was opening the front door, wrapping a silk robe around herself tightly. She peered out the screen as Jack pressed his face to it.

"Aw, I knew you wouldn't make me stay out here all day. Gimme a kiss, moonshine."

"Shut up, Jack," she said distractedly, then opened the screen enough to ease outside, closing it before he could get back in. "I'm sorry, about that, Detectives . . . ?"

The brunette extended his hand and she shook it. "Daniels, Mrs. Dawes, and this is Detective Grady, Fair Oaks PD. I'm sorry to intrude, but we need to ask your husband a few questions."

Rachel sighed as Jack slid behind her, reaching back and grabbing his hands as he snickered to himself. "I'm sorry about my --- _ooh! --- husband_," she countered with an over-the-shoulder glare at Jack, pulling him around and sending him back to the swing with a shove. He went with a small laugh, flopping back in the swing with his arms over the back. Rachel turned back to the detectives and smoothed her hair behind her ears. "What can I do for you?"

Daniels sighed as Jack leered at Rachel. She ignored him. "We just need to ask Mr. Dawes a few questions, ma'am."

"Wasn't me," Jack offered. "I was having sex at the time."

Rachel's back tensed, but she only offered the detective her best smile. "Would you like to come inside, detectives? Out of the noise?"

They looked between the two as Jack hooted with laughter. "Mrs. Dawes, we're just here to talk with your husband."

"And you still haven't told me why. What's wrong? Fair Oaks is ten miles away, and not even in this county. You're a bit out of your jurisdiction."

Daniels clearly wasn't pleased, but he adjusted his lapels. "You're aware of the recent spat of kidnappings in Fair Oaks?" he asked. Rachel nodded. "There have been . . . developments. If we could go inside . . . ?"

Jack stood up and wrapped one arm around Rachel's waist, the other curving protectively around her shoulders. He wasn't laughing any more. "What's that got to do with me?"

"Shush, Jack," Rachel said, opening the door. "Come inside, detectives." She waved them in as they thanked her, then lead them into the kitchen. "Have a seat. What's going on, and why do you need Jack for it?"

The detectives stayed standing, despite the chairs they were offered. They watched Jack pace to the fridge, pulling Rachel with him. She took his hand and squeezed it, kissing his shoulder gently as he gulped orange juice from a pitcher.

"Well?" he asked without turning around.

"Shh, Jack," Rachel murmured, kissing his shoulder again as she ran her fingers down his scars.

"Three victims so far," Grady finally said. His hard blue eyes bored into Jack's head. "The bodies were dumped in the woods ---"

"Bodies?" Rachel interrupted. "They've been murdered?"

"That's what 'bodies' generally refers to," Jack commented. "Slashed like me?" He made a half circle in the air with his finger, still staring into the fridge.

"Ah . . ."

"Come on," he snarled, "that's the only reason you'd come looking for me. Do you think I did it, or do you just want a psychopath's opinion on the killer?"

"You're a little touchy about all this, Mr. Dawes," Grady said. He had his hands on his hips, which pushed his suit jacket back and showed the butt of his gun.

"'Course I am. You think after fourteen years people are going to forget about _me_? I mean, I know all the little towns in this area fit a horse, horse and a half, but you're not _that_ po-dunk out here. Either you think I've got something to do with those girls, or you think I can help you find the killer." He grabbed an apple from a tray of fruit next to the fridge and smacked his wife's rear, heading toward the living room as he bit into it with a crunch. "Can't help you." There was a faint hiss. "Fuck, and last night was so _good_, too. What a buzz-kill . . ."

Rachel sighed as she looked after him, then turned back to the detectives. "Is my husband a suspect?" she asked bluntly.

"He's certainly not concerned with endearing himself to anybody." Daniels exchanged looks with Grady as Rachel ran her fingers through her hair, combing it slightly.

"Jack's never been concerned with making a good impression on complete strangers just for the hell of it. Is he a suspect?"

Daniels sighed and shook his head. "No, Mrs. Dawes, he's not."

"Not yet."

"Not yet," he admitted.

"Tell me about the murders."

"We're not at liberty ---"

"If you want my husband to help you," Rachel cut him off with narrowed eyes, "then _I_ need to know the details so I can convince him to cooperate. 'Please' and 'thank you' don't work with him."

They exchanged glances again, then Daniels shrugged and took out a small packet of photos. He handed it to Rachel and she took them out, lips pursed as she flipped through them.

"Three victims in the last two months, all female, mid to late twenties. The first one was found two weeks ago in the woods, and we found the other two within five miles of the first. They'd been beaten, raped, and tortured before their throats were slit. The . . . mouth . . . happened when they were still alive."

"Jack was with me when they were kidnapped," Rachel mused as she stared at the pictures of the bodies. 'Whore' had been carved into them, in addition to the Glasgow smiles. "Or in town; he doesn't go very far."

"He's not a suspect, ma'am. He just has . . . experience with this sort of thing, and right now, we have nothing to work on. No new people in town, no suspicious activities, nothing. The women didn't know each other, either. Nothing to connect them."

"They look similar," Rachel said, finally sitting down and throwing the pictures on the table. "Green eyes, brown hair, around five nine . . ."

"You fit the profile," Jack mumbled from the doorway. She turned to look at him and he hadn't put a shirt on, but he held jeans and a t-shirt, which he set next to Rachel. "Go put these on." He was frowning down at the pictures, his lips pursed, but pulled Rachel into a tight embrace when she stood up. "Change right outside the kitchen," he whispered in her ear. His fingers trailed through her hair, then across her cheeks and he kissed her gently. "Go." Rachel left, then he turned to the detectives and took her vacated chair, swinging it around so he was straddling it with his arms crossed over the back as he poked through the pictures. "Still alive when their faces were cut . . . carved up pretty good, too. Beaten, raped . . ."

"Very good, Mr. Dawes," Grady started.

Jack waved him off with a snort. "I was listening at the door." His lips quirked up to the right at their expressions. "You think I'm going to leave my wife alone with strangers, in what she's wearing?" Then he cleared his throat and his eyelids lowered to slits as he leaned over the pictures, gripping the back of the chair and resting his chin on his fists. "Pretty good work. Got a little sloppy here," and he gestured, "or maybe they started struggling. He's got experience, at any rate. Not an amateur." Then he sat back as Rachel came back in, leaning his head against her stomach as she ran her fingers through his hair. "These are all things you could find out without me, so why are you really here?"

"Can you tell us anything about the killer?"

He rolled his eyes, staring up at Rachel. She wasn't smiling at him. He hated it when she wasn't smiling at him. "No, I can't. Too soon, I've been out of the game too long. Come back with more information once a couple more girls go missing and I might be able to help."

"Does it matter to you at all, that these women are dead?" Grady asked sharply.

Jack finally looked at him. "No," he said simply. "It has nothing to do with me; if Rachel went missing, I'd find the fucker myself and kill him, but these have no impact on my life, so I don't care. Sorry, I haven't taken my love-people pills this morning. These," he continued with a wave at the pictures. "are just objects. Things. Inconsequential. I know their friends and families would protest, but I'm not their friend or their family." He pushed back on Rachel until she let him stand. "Now, detectives, good luck finding him and all, but I've got things I need to do today. If I don't show Susie how to do a proper lift today, she'll whine forever."

"Susie?"

"Yeah," Jack said as he browsed for more food. "I teach a dance class in town on Saturdays. What? Can't I have a job?"

"Sorry," Daniels said as he gathered the photos. "We weren't expecting you to be a dance teacher."

"I've always known how," the scarred man replied, looking at his wife with a grin that she finally returned. "Look, obviously you know how to track me down, so if you need any more help I'll play along. Until then, get out."

"I'll walk you to the door," Rachel offered. The men followed her, leaving Jack to dig out the orange juice again and slip a toaster pastry into the oven to warm up. His shoulders only relaxed when Rachel's hands ran over them, digging in and then offering two pills at his lips. He laughed softly and took them, making sure to suck as much of her fingers into his mouth as possible, rolling his tongue around the slender digits and biting down gently. Rachel leaned her cheek against his back and sighed. "That wasn't polite."

"I'm not a polite guy." He took a gulp of the juice to wash the pills down, Rachel's fingers playing along his scars and he leaned into the contact before turning, wrapping his arms around her waist and holding her close. She returned the embrace as he buried his face in her hair, taking deep breaths. He was melancholy, and clinging in the way he only clung when he was worried about her. "Don't go anywhere alone from now on," he murmured in her ear, then held her face in his hands and kissed her lips firmly. "Please, Rachel."

She pulled back, green eyes shining at him, and then kissed the bite she'd given him the previous night. He sighed and wove his hands through her hair, holding her head in place.

"Dance class is at one," she whispered. "It's barely nine."

"Yeah, well. I wanted some make-up sex and they were in the way." One hand slid under her shirt, ghosting over her breasts before rubbing them. Rachel's breath on his chest hitched. "C'mon, cupcake," he whispered in her ear, undoing the button on her loose jeans and then pushing them off of her hips.

"In the kitchen?" she giggled.

Jack thought as he pinched her nipple gently. "You're right. Get the blanket. Porch'll do just fine."

"Jack!" He smiled down at her and Rachel just laughed, leading him to the living room, where she grabbed a huge blanket from the linen closet before heading to the porch. "All right, this was _your_ --- hey!"

He'd grabbed her back and thrown her gently on the couch, kneeling down and working at getting her clothes off, humming while he did so. Rachel gasped and pulled his hand between her legs once they were both naked, and Jack obliged with a laugh. When she was whimpering with pleasure he pushed her thighs open enough to slide between them and into her, and if he normally held her in his lap at this time, well, sometimes he needed the comfort of covering her with his body.

When he finally lay his head on her sweaty breasts, Jack let out a long sigh. Rachel was instantly touching his face, and he smiled despite himself.

"Are you worried?" she murmured.

"Eh." He closed his eyes. "Left my thing in the oven."

"I turned it off. Do you think this is just a coincidence?"

"No one of any importance knew we moved here," he said with a shrug, enjoying her presence. "But word gets around. Could have reached someone by now. You fit the vic profile, at any rate, so I don't want you out and about alone."

"I won't. Are you really going to cooperate if those detectives come back?"

Her arms were warm and comforting across his back. He sighed. "Yeah, sure. Why not." Then, "Forgive me, yet?"

Her laughter was muffled as she kissed his neck. "Yes, asshole, I forgive you."

"Good."

***

"Mr. Jack! Mr. Jack! Mr. Jack!"

"Oh my God, SusieSusieSusie!" Jack returned with a roll of his eyes as the small girl bounced up and down, returning her frantic waves with wild gestures of his own. "Christ, I hate kids," he muttered as Rachel laughed.

"You're great with them."

"I threatened to kill her." The girl's older sister was there, too, fifteen and pretty and staring at Jack with love-sick eyes.

"She'd just run into the street," Rachel reminded him. "You were scaring her into obedience; what do you think the original fairy tales were meant to do?"

"You only know that because I told you." He took her hand as they crossed the street to the small dance studio, and the five-year-old threw herself at his legs, hugging him tightly. Rachel laughed again when Jack had to do an odd twist to keep Susie's face from landing in his crotch, then she greeted the girl's sister, who hadn't stopped staring at Jack.

"How are you, Janet?"

"I'm good, thank you. Susie, let Mr. Jack go."

"Lift me!" the girl demanded instead. Jack sighed and did, holding her above his head with one hand as he unlocked the studio. Susie shrieked with laughter. Janet was frowning, which was why he'd lifted the girl up instead of ignoring her. The he tucked her under his arm like a sack of potatoes as they all went inside.

"Ready to learn how to do a lift?" he asked.

"Yeah!" Susie squealed.

"Good. Sit down and wait."

"_What_?!"

Jack was grinning as he pulled Rachel into a hug. "I have to kiss my wife goodbye," he told Susie. "This is important grown-up stuff." Grown-up stuff that Janet obviously wished he'd do with _her_. Rachel didn't know if Jack had realised the girl had a crush on him; she doubted it, because if he had, he probably wouldn't go near her. And Janet wasn't the only teenager or twenty-something in town whose knees he made weak. Jack exuded the bad-boy vibe even while on his best behaviour, and that was probably the main reason his dance class had as many female students as it did.

"Ew!" Susie grouched, sitting down and crossing her arms over her chest. Jack was trying not to laugh, making kissy noises before his lips actually met Rachel's. She kept the kiss quick and chaste.

"I'll be in the office," she told him. "Might as well get a bit of work done." She avoided a pinch to the rear and glared at him. "You behave, Jack."

"Bah, you're not the boss of me!" he exclaimed.

"Yes she is, Mr. Jack," Susie piped up. "You _always_ do what Miss Rachel tells you." Her voice was wise and knowing, and Jack turned slightly to stare at her.

"Uh . . ."

"Remember when she made you do the splits?" The girl giggled and Jack scowled.

"Yeah, well, it's only 'cause she feeds me."

"And if you don't behave, I won't bring you lunch." Rachel tweaked his nose before walking out the door.

Jack sat next to Susie, who crawled into his lap despite her sister's protests and threw her arms around his neck. He looked surprised, not quite sure what to do with his arms or hands.

"If Miss Rachel doesn't bring you lunch, I'll give you some of my sammich," she told him earnestly.

He settled on ruffling her red-brown hair. "Thanks, kid. She'll bring me lunch; she always does."

"Because she thinks you're hot!"

"_What_?!" Jack stared at the girl, wondering where she _heard_ half the things that came out of her mouth.

"She thinks you're hot," Susie said. "She told Mommy last Saturday that that's why she keeps you around, and that you're good in bed. And you've got a nice butt, too. That's what Mommy said."

"Susie! Leave Mr. Jack alone!" Janet wailed. She was turning bright red as she pulled her sister out of Jack's lap, and he blinked a few times. "I'm _so_ sorry, Mr. Jack," she gasped as Susie squirmed and whined.

"Eh, it's all right. Doesn't know what she's talking about." He stood and cleared his throat, maybe a little self-conscious that a five-year-old had been repeating an adult conversation that had been about him, and he was saved when another group of kids walked in. "Hey, Susie, shut it, all right? It's time to warm up. We're going to learn lifts today," he said in a louder voice, turning to his students. There were cheers; they'd been waiting for this for three months, ever since Jack had lifted Rachel above his head in the middle of the street after one class.

***

"Miss Rachel! Miss Rachel! Mommy said I can come over for lunch!"

Rachel raised both eyebrows at Jack as he hoisted Susie onto his back. Janet was following them across the street as the other students went off with their friends or parents, blushing. The woman probably wanted to get started on the booze early, but she shook her head to get rid of that thought. Mary's husband had died in a hit-and-run; she was taking it hard, even after two years.

"Really?" she asked as Jack kissed her.

"Getting sloshed early," he muttered against her lips.

"Yeah!" Susie chirped. She squeezed Jack's neck and he made a choking noise, his upper lip curling in a snarl.

"Susie, you're choking Jack."

"I'm sorry!" She squirmed up his back to lean over and kiss him on the cheek, which made him stumble as all four of them walked to the car.

"Do we want to go to the deli and get something, then go back home?" Rachel asked. She was laughing at the startled and unsure look on Jack's face as Susie rested her cheek against his. "Janet?"

"Uh? Oh, uhm, sure . . . if that's all right." She smiled shyly at Jack, who looped one arm around her shoulders and one around Rachel's waist, having moved Susie to his own shoulders.

The way she was blushing and leaning into his casual embrace made Rachel wonder how Jack _couldn't_ realise the kid was head-over-heels in love with him. Then again, she herself was the only person who generally got that close to him, so it might not have occurred to him that it wasn't everyday behaviour. Janet was now bright red, trying to hide that fact from Rachel as Jack hummed to himself.

"Hey, why not?" he finally decided as Susie laughed and braided his hair. "I've got two and a half lovely ladies, why not show them off?" He grinned at both of them, then tilted his head up to look at Susie. "Wanna make s'mores later?"

"Yeah! I love s'mores!"

"Good. Down you go," he said as they entered the deli. "Go get whatever you want." He gave her a small shove, then called out, "I want the tuna melt on wheat!"

"Okay!" the girl called back.

"Order your own food, Jack," Rachel told him.

He raised a quizzical eyebrow at her. "Why? Isn't that what kids are for?"

"They're to love, cherish, and nurture," he was told.

"Well . . . that's what I've got _you_ for." He said it like she ought to have known, then rubbed the back of his neck. "Geez, your mom's not getting grandkids from anybody. She's gonna be pissed. And what the hell did that brat do to my hair?" he asked suddenly, feeling the three braids that were sticking up from the top of his head.

Rachel burst into laughter, which prompted Janet to giggle a bit herself. "Took you long enough to notice. I think it looks cute."

"_I_ am _not . . . cute_," Jack growled, but Rachel leaned up to kiss him. "Okay, I'm freaking adorable."

She rolled her eyes. "Right. Get what you want, Janet."

"Thank you, Mrs. Dawes." The girl followed her sister, glancing briefly back at Jack and Rachel.

"What's up with _her_?" Jack asked as he rested his cheek on Rachel's head. "That time of the mo---_oof_! What was _that_ for?" He rubbed the stomach she'd just elbowed and glowered at her.

"Show a little compassion, Jack."

"I don't _have_ any."

"Rule number one with women," Rachel went on, "is that you do _not_ make light of our periods. _Ever_." Then she pushed away from him and went up to order her own sandwich as Susie came back with theirs.

"She was mean to me just now," he told the five-year-old as they sat at a table.

Ever ready to leap to Jack's defence, Susie immediately turned in her seat. "Don't be mean to Mr. Jack, Miss Rachel!" she called out. "I'm gonna marry him some day!"

Jack spluttered as Rachel started laughing, trying not to choke. "Y, yeah," he coughed. "Some day. In . . . twelve years. Uhm. Right."

"He's just being a big baby!" Rachel called back as she paid. "And you can't marry him; he's mine." She set a tray of drinks down in front of them as Jack and Susie let out twin whines, then sat after Janet had. "She's a bit young for you anyway, Jack."

"Oh, but _Janet_ isn't." He turned and wiggled his eyebrows at the girl, who froze, her eyes huge. Then Jack laughed. "Oh, come on, I'm just teasing. I am _bliss_fully married to an amazing woman. Even if she _is_ mean and makes me sleep on the porch."

He was threatened with a salad fork. "You deserved it," Rachel told him, "and shut up."

Jack scratched at his chest again as he grinned. "Yeah, sure."

"You're in the high school play this year, aren't you, Janet?" Rachel asked, ignoring her husband and leaving him to the company of a five-year-old girl.

"Uhm, yeah . . ."

"What part are you playing?"

Janet fidgeted as she took a nibble of her sandwich. "Uhm, a handmaid and a party-goer."

"Eat that," Jack said as she pushed her sandwich away from herself. Janet looked at him in surprise and tried to protest that she wasn't hungry, but he cut her off with a frown. "_Eat _it. You just got out of an hour-long dance class, and you worked your butt off. There's no way you're not hungry, and don't give me that diet bullshit." He sat back in his seat as he glared at the girl. She looked like she was about to cry. "What is it with you women and being thin? Men like _curves_, you know. God, if we wanted a girl with the body of a ten-year-old boy, we'd just do the ten-year-old boy, you know?" He was disgusted, and even Susie was looking chastised.

"Jack . . ."

"I, I'm sorry," Janet whispered as her lower lip quivered.

"It's all right, Janet," Rachel assured her as she hugged the girl. "Jack hasn't learned to be tactful yet."

"What for?" he asked. "So you can starve yourself and I can sit back and say 'Hmm, Janet's looking a mite thin these days, don't you think?' Whatever." Then he looked between the two and sighed. "Look, Janet, I'm sorry. I didn't meant to upset you. You look just fine the way you are; you don't need to lose weight."

"Cathy called me fat the other day," the girl sniffed.

"Cathy's a stupid slut," Jack replied.

"_Jack_! Not in front of Susie!" Rachel glared at him and he turned to the girl.

"If you tell anyone I said that, I'll throw you into the ocean, okay?" he asked cheerfully.

Susie's eyes were wide as she nodded and ate her little sandwich. "Okay," she promised. "I won't tell."

"All better. Now, Cathy is exactly what I called her and you know it. She's a snot, and the only reason she thinks you're fat is because she's so ridiculously scrawny. I can count her ribs. It's disgusting." He scoffed and snapped his fingers at Janet, who took a hurried bite of her food. "Better. I don't want to hear any more diet crap from you, all right?"

"Okay," Janet whispered, and then he reached over and ruffled her hair with a grin.

"Buck up, sunshine. I'm not mad at you." He pushed her drink at her as she smiled at him. "There you go. We'll build a big bonfire to roast s'mores on, how's about?"

Rachel sat back and smiled as Jack coaxed smiles out of the two girls.


	2. Chapter 2

Her breath was warm on his shoulder when Jack woke up. They'd stayed the night out on the beach, taking advantage of the bonfire he'd built for Susie and Janet, and also the extra-large sleeping bag they had. The wind had picked up; there was a storm on the way. He smiled and held Rachel tighter against him, stroking her hair as his heart rate picked up. The storms out here were beautiful, unbridled energy that made him want to run into the centre of the destruction and lose himself in it. Rachel would often find him bundled in a blanket at the end of their dock, letting the wind and rain beat at him. He'd get a small lecture each time, but she still let him go out. She knew he needed it.

Almost as much as he needed _her_. She was moving a bit, now, stretching a little as she woke up and Jack raised one hand to cup her breast gently. That prompted a sleepy giggle and she snuggled closer. Oh, Rachel . . .

"Oh, God," she groaned suddenly.

"Hmm?" Jack had lowered his lips to her neck, shifting so he could lean over her.

"I'm freezing."

"I'll warm you up," he whispered against her skin, delighted when she arched her neck into the contact and slid one leg between his. He raised his head to kiss her lips, the hand not stroking her hair now roaming over her body. Rachel sighed again and pushed against his hand, smiling as she wrapped her arms around his neck. Her body was moving with his touch, and she was right; it _was_ cold. All Jack wanted to do was bury himself in her warmth, both literal and figurative, so rather than draw things out he pushed into her as soon as she pulled him to her, gasping softly in his ear. Rachel bit her lower lip with a soft hiss as her hips moved with his, her hands running over his back, nails pressing into his skin. Her neck arched and he kissed it, sucked at the pulse, moved down to her breasts as he slid one arm beneath her waist and lifted slightly for a better angle.

One leg around his waist, the other bent at the knee as she pushed up against him, their gasps and soft moans loud in the confines of the sleeping bag, lips meeting with impassioned abandon, this, _this_ was everything he needed, right here, right now. She clung to him, cried out a name that she'd made his, begged and whimpered and oh, her voice was so _sweet_ as that pressure built between her thighs. He brushed damp hair from her forehead and kissed her again, and again, eyes never leaving hers, not even when they rolled back in her head as her body convulsed around him. Her nails finally broke skin and he choked on a groan as he shuddered in her arms, finally resting his head between her breasts as they both panted. She wrapped him in her embrace, squeezing her thighs around his hips tightly, her fingers in his hair, against his scalp, making him moan with pleasure as she scratched at him gently.

"I love you, Jack," she whispered.

He closed his eyes against the words, against the world, willing it all away. It was all he needed here, now, this, her, him, them. He didn't need anything else. Nothing else . . . nothing . . . else . . .

The storm raged about them.

***

The curtain fell, the crowd clapped, and Jack leaned in toward Rachel.

"That was the stupidest play I've ever seen. He didn't love her; hell, he was whining about that one girl and how much he loved _her_. What made Juliet think he was going to stay with her?"

"Shush, Jack, it's romantic."

He scoffed. "It's satire, is what it is, and it's stupid."

"Well, we're not here so you can play theatre critic, we're here to support Janet."

"Yeah, well, someone has to. Useless mother can't even show up for her kid, makes me do it . . ." Rachel shushed him again, gesturing to the row in front of them where Susie sat, cheering her sister on with a few friends from school. Jack rolled his eyes. "And why did we invite the entire damned cast over?"

"Because it's closing night and they needed a place to have their closing night party, dear. Don't make me put you out on the porch again." Rachel wiped at her eyes and then rubbed her stomach with a wince.

Jack covered her hand. "Are you all right?"

"Hm? Yeah, just a stomach ache." She smiled at him as the cast came out and bowed, then kissed his cheek. "I just need some rest."

"Oh nonono, you are _not_ leaving me to supervise those brats," he warned her with a scowl.

"Come on, Jack, you're great with kids."

"I threaten to kill them and they believe me. That's the only reason they do what I tell them to."

"Right," Rachel murmured. "The girls want you, the boys want to _be_ you. Do you know how often I've heard them boasting at football games that the Joker lives in their town?"

Jack groaned and covered his eyes. "I set out to be the Clown Prince of Crime, not a fucking idol."

She pat his arm with a yawn. "Jeff says crime dropped when we moved here. The crooks are afraid you'll come after them."

"Those 'crooks' are teenage boys barely old enough to shave." Still, Jack's chest puffed out a little. It was good to know he was still feared.

"Jack, am I coming over, too?!"

Of course, it was difficult to be intimidating when a small girl was climbing over the back of her seat and into his lap, throwing her arms around his neck and hugging him tightly. Jack groaned.

"Yeah, peaches, you are," he told her, and Susie turned to her friends with a superior look. "Can we get out of here?" he asked Rachel.

She nodded and they stood, Jack holding Susie on his hip and completely missing the knowing smile she gave him. They had to hang around for a bit to wait until Janet got out of her costume, and as a group of boys surrounded Jack wanting to know how to blow things up, Rachel hung at the edges and just listened as people walked by. She didn't like what she heard.

"Can we go?" Janet finally asked. "I'm _starving_." There was a snort from Cathy, who had played Juliet, and her group of friends laughed after a muttered comment. Jack had just turned to her when Janet snarled. "_Men_," she stressed, "_like_ curves, Cathy."

"Why do you think I don't let Rachel diet?" Jack asked smoothly, pulling Rachel in front of him with a grin and running his hands over her hips. _Cathy's_ crush, at least, he was aware of, and it disgusted him. "She curves in _all_ the right places."

"Yeah!" Susie put in, sticking her tongue out at Cathy as she hid behind Jack's legs.

With that, Jack herded his women to the car, muttering loudly about spoiled anorexics with no brains to speak of. Rachel rolled her eyes, but with Janet actually defending herself and the glow on her face from it, she couldn't bring herself to correct her husband's behaviour.

***

Susie and Janet never left Jack's side during the party, not even when he started the bonfire and was showing the young men in the cast how to make a canon out of a cardboard tube, a Pringles can, and a soda can. Rachel had spent all afternoon cleaning, making sure that the ropes, handcuffs, and other such toys they had were well-hidden. There were some things that ought to stay a secret, she mused as she wandered through the house. Two bedrooms and a bathroom upstairs, another bedroom and a bathroom, living room, kitchen, dining room, and laundry room downstairs. They really didn't _need_ this much room, but Rachel was still holding out hope for converting at least one of the bedrooms into a nursery in the next year or two. If she could convince Jack, that was . . . She leaned against the porch railing and watched him down at the beach, helping Susie build a sand castle as Janet talked with a group of her friends.

The girl was sniffling, and it took a while for Jack to realise that it wasn't from the cold night air. He looked around for Rachel, but didn't see her; must still be in the house. Damn it.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he asked as gently as he could. Just . . . pretend it was Rachel sniffling, minus the kissing and licking and attempts at comfort-sex.

"I don't wanna go home," she whimpered, coming around the castle to curl up in his lap again.

Jack blinked and hesitantly stroked her hair. "Okay . . . why not? It's your home. All your toys are there."

"Mommy will just yell and cry," Susie told him as she hugged him. "She doesn't want me any more."

He was out of his comfort range and sinking fast. "Uh . . . sure she wants you. She's just . . . upset right now. It's not your fault?" Shiiiit, where was Rachel when he needed her?

Susie shook her head. "All she does is cry about Daddy being gone. She says she wants to be with him. She doesn't love me because I'm bad."

He hadn't known that the Mills' issues at home were quite so severe. Then again, it was nothing compared to what his brain told him he'd been through, but still. Right now all Jack wanted was for this small girl-child to stop crying.

"You're not bad, Susie, and your mother loves you," he told her, wrapping his arms around her and rocking slightly. Rachel liked being held when she was sad, so hopefully Susie would also be comforted by it. He didn't know if he was lying or not, but it was worth a try. "She's still sad about your father" _painslaphitpunchtears_ "being gone," he went on as he shook his head sharply, "but that doesn't mean she doesn't love you."

"I look like Daddy and she hates it; she told me so." He swallowed sharply as she burst into tears, making soothing noises at her. Susie hiccuped. "Why can't _you_ be my Daddy?" she whimpered. "I could live with you and Miss Rachel, and then Mommy wouldn't be so sad all of the time."

Something in him clenched the way it did when Rachel was upset and he was powerless to comfort her. Jack pursed his lips and then pressed a kiss to Susie's forehead as he stood up with her. "Now look, pumpkin-face, your mom needs you to be strong for her, all right? She'll get better, I promise."

Actually, chances were that the woman would drink herself to death before she got her head out of her ass and started caring for her children again, but Jack let Susie think things would work out as she raised her face to his, eyes lit up with hope. Too bad some hope killed. He swung her up and around and she shrieked with laughter as he brought her back up to the house, where Rachel was watching him with a smile he wasn't quite sure he liked. There wasn't anything malicious about it, it just . . . the way she looked from him to the girl in his arms made him uneasy. Jack hated feeling uneasy.

"Is everything all right?" she asked mildly.

"Uh, yeah. Just having a heart-to-heart." He chewed the inside of his lip as he stared at her, trying to figure out what the woman was thinking up _now_. Then he looked at Susie, curled up with her head on his shoulder and a smile on her face, and then he looked back at Rachel and the look on her face as she watched them and his eyes got wide as he shook his head.

"Oh, _no_. Rachel,_ no_. I'm not . . . we're not . . . I don't want ---"

The look disappeared, replaced by pursed lips and narrowed eyes as Rachel shoved away from the railing. "Forget it, Jack. I didn't say anything."

He followed her up the stairs and inside, where he laid Susie on the couch and covered her with a blanket. "No, Rachel, look, I don't want a kid. We're not . . . can we even _afford_ one? I don't know how to be a father. I'd probably kill it. Christ, don't give me that look." It was a good thing that only a few students were left, and outside to boot. There was no one to hear Jack try to dissuade Rachel from the notion of children. He ran his hand through his hair and then pawed at his scars with his fingers and tongue as he followed her into the kitchen. "Look, baby, please ---"

"I said forget it," she snapped without looking at him, gathering pizza boxes to throw out. "Quit jumping to conclusions."

"The way you were looking at us, it didn't seem like such a crazy thing to think," he told her, heart pounding. "What do you want kids for, anyway? I mean, isn't this enough?" He gestured around them, between them. "Shit, Rach ---"

"Just stop it, Jack, stop it." Rachel planted her hands on her hips and glared at him from across the kitchen. "Maybe it's _not_ enough for me any more, Jack. Maybe I _want_ to be a mother. _Maybe_, just maybe, I want _you_ to be a _father_." She turned the sink on roughly to rinse dishes. "I don't know why you're so against kids, Jack," she muttered. "They adore you. Damn it, you _knew_ I wanted children!" She was disgusted, and Jack was afraid she'd break a dish and get hurt, so he stepped behind her to take the plate from her. "Don't touch me!" He stepped back. "It's not like you're going to have to raise them on your own, you know. I'll be here, too. And if you're worried that I'll stop loving you as much, you're an idiot."

Jack winced; that thought _had_ crossed his mind. He stared, face pinched, as Rachel did the dishes in a huff, not sure how to tell her that the thought of _her_ body swollen with _his_ child was one of the most glorious, amazing, _terrifying_ thoughts he'd ever had. He couldn't be a father. Hell, he could barely be a _human_ at times. What if he lost control like he had before? What if he couldn't handle the crying and snapped? What if, and his heart threatened to stop, Rachel died giving birth? What if he turned out as abusive as his own father? No, no matter how much he wanted it, he had to deny his ego and avoid having children. He just couldn't make Rachel understand this.

Case in point . . . Jack eased his hands out of the fists they'd balled into, rubbing them together to make sure they weren't bleeding. He hadn't broken the skin, but almost. Oh, shit, but now Rachel was sitting at the table with her head in her hands, crying. He went to her and pulled her into a tight embrace despite her muffled protests, kissing her hair and trying to get her to calm down.

"I'm sorry, Jack," she whimpered, "I'm just . . . I want a _family_. God, I can't stop _thinking_ about it, about how you'd look holding our baby . . ." She wiped at her eyes and leaned into him, shoulders slumping. Jack stared down at her and the words he wanted to say stuck in his throat. "I'm sorry. Oh, darn it, I've just . . . I'm sorry, Jack."

He sighed and pressed his lips to her hair. "It's all right."

"It's _not_ all right," Rachel said as she looked up at him. Jack's gaze slid to the side.

"Are you mad at me?"

"This isn't just about _you_, Jack. I'm sorry I blew up, but I've just . . . this is something I really want, and I know we haven't talked about it at _all_, but I've been thinking about it a lot." She sat up straighter and looked out the window as she sighed. "Can we?" she asked. "Talk about it, I mean."

Jack sat across from her and crossed his arms in front of him on the table, hunching over a little. He was trying not to make a distasteful face; Rachel did, after all, deserve to hear why he wasn't keen on the pitter-patter of little feet in the house.

"What's there to talk about?" he asked after he'd cleared his throat once or twice. "I mean, I'm sure we can't really afford a kid, and aren't we a little old for one, anyway?"

Rachel rubbed her eyes and sighed again. "We can afford to have a child, Jack," she told him. "I make good enough money that your dance class is just extra cash; you could teach it for free if you felt like it."

"If you're good at something, never do it for free."

"Regardless," Rachel went on, "we have no mortgage, no car payments . . . nothing, really. Cell phones, cable, internet, gas, food . . . those are our major expenses, and we're still making more money than we're spending. I don't recall the exact balance of my account, but you and I are easily two of the richest people in this town."

"Not too hard to do," he muttered. She gave him a stern look. "All right, but we're still old to have kids. You're almost forty, and I'm . . . well . . . hell if I know, but look, see? Grey hairs." He pointed at his temples and Rachel rolled her eyes.

"I had a friend in high school who started going grey his freshman year, Jack. Grey hairs aren't a good argument." She looked down and fiddled with her wedding band. "And 'almost forty' is one of the reasons I want a child now. If we wait much longer, it's going to be hard to conceive."

"Whoa, whoa," Jack said as he lifted his hands up in front of him, "I haven't agreed to a damn thing."

"I was talking theoretically," Rachel said with another hard look. Then she waved her hand irritably. "Logical arguments aside, why don't you want a child? It's not because of money or age."

Because . . . it . . . scared him? How the hell did he say _that_? His tongue was dragging along his scars, inside and out, as he tried to think up a good excuse that wasn't _lying_, but also wasn't the truth. Rachel just looked at him.

"How do you know I'd be a good father? Remember what happens when my meds stop working?"

"Would you stop using your medication as a God damned _crutch_?" Rachel hissed. Her cheeks were flushed and she was mad. Very mad. Jack hated it when she was mad. He winced and started to open his mouth, but she cut him off. "_Every_ time you don't want to do something, you bring up your damned pills, Jack. Taking the boat up the coast? Moaning about losing your pills overboard! That conference in California I was supposed to go to last summer? 'Oh, crap, Rachel, what if I forget my pills while you're gone?' You are _so_ damned _needy_, Jack!" Rachel slammed her hands down on the table and pushed herself up, pacing around the kitchen. "You're set in your ways and God forbid anything disrupt you!"

"This isn't some damned excuse, Rachel!" Jack snapped at her. She planted her fists on her hips and returned his glare. "You've seen every damned inch of me, Rachel. Do you really think I had a pleasant time growing up? Do you think Mommy and Daddy took me to the candy store each time I got a good school report? What, summers in the country or some crap like that? I may not remember much about my past, honey bunches, but I do _not** ever**_ remember it being _good_. I'm a fucking psychotic sociopath; it didn't happen overnight. So yeah, maybe I'm a _little_ bit worried that if you pop out a kid, _I'm_ not going to be able to handle it." He stood up at this point and stalked over to Rachel to glare down at her. "Do you know how _hard_ it is for me to wake up as your husband on a _good_ day?" he asked her in a low voice, and had the satisfaction of seeing her eyes widen a little. "I open my eyes in the morning and _everything_ rushes in at me all at once, Rachel, and for a moment I don't know who I am, where I am, or if I'm in danger or not. Then there's a body next to me and it's warm and alive and snuggled close like it's _happy_ to be there, and sometimes I spend five, ten minutes staring at you until I feel like I can get up without going crazy. If I have to do all of _that_ when I've gotten a _good_ night's rest," he said as he took her by the shoulders, "what might happen if it's three a.m. and the fourth time the kid's woken up screaming? What if it won't shut the fuck up?" Jack shook her gently. "Well?"

"You're acting like you're going to be raising a child alone," Rachel returned. "Like you're not going to have any help. You're gentle with _me_, Jack, when you've had a bad night, and you can be gentle with a baby, too." He rolled his eyes and shook his head. Rachel took one of his hands and placed it over her abdomen. She wouldn't let go when he tried to pull it away, looking up at him with big green eyes and lips that were trying not to pout, which was as bad as when they _were_ pouting. "You're so good with kids," she murmured. "Amazingly good with them. I've wanted to be a mother longer than I've wanted to be anything, Jack, and you're the only man I want as their father." Now the tears started welling up, the fucking tears, and the sniffles weren't far behind. Rachel was so good at this, she didn't even realise what she was doing. "I know we can raise a child together. If you want to hire a nanny, we can do that." And there it was, a small sniffle as she leaned her head against his chest and pressed his hand into her womb. "Please, Jack, just consider it?"

It was torture holding still, not taking her in his arms and promising her anything she wanted. Jack's lips thinned as he stared hard at the refrigerator.

"No."

Rachel pushed away from him and headed to the stairs. She was trying to hide the tears falling down her cheeks. "I'm going to bed." Jack stayed where he was until their door click shut, then his hands clenched and he turned and hit the wall before grabbing another six-pack of root beer from the fridge and stalking out into the living room, where he came to a dead stop.

"What are you doing here?" he asked Janet. She was sitting on the couch, pretending she hadn't hear every word of the fight, with Susie curled up next to her.

"I . . . Mom never showed up to get us," was the whispered response.

"So? Call her."

Now _Janet_ was crying, quietly. "She didn't pick up the phone."

Jack stared at her for a long time, then let his breath out all at once. "_Fuck_." He set the root beer down and stomped to the downstairs bedroom, flinging the door open and surveying it before turning back to Janet. "Sleep in here, both of you." He crossed his arms over his chest and glared as the girl gathered her sister and slipped into the room, cheeks still wet and getting wetter, and ignored her whispered thanks. "I'll be on the porch," Jack growled, shutting the door firmly, retrieving his root beer, and then throwing himself onto the swing and cracking open the first can.


	3. Chapter 3

More girls had gone missing.

The only thing they had in common, the one thing that was the same for all victims, was their brown hair and green eyes. It didn't matter if they wore coloured contacts or dyed their hair --- they all had brown hair and green eyes at the time of their disappearances, and were between five-eight and five-ten.

Jack stared at the map that Detectives Grady and Daniels had shown him, lips pursed, then he shook his head and picked up a pencil. Without asking permission, he drew on it with faint lines, first connecting where the victims had been taken from, first to last, then where they'd been found, when they'd been found, and finally he started at the highest marker and drew up and over, down to the lowest marker, making a quarter circle, then curved down and out into the ocean to complete the circle. He looked at it for a long time before he spoke.

"What's the radius of this circle?" he asked.

Detective Grady blinked. "About ten miles. Give or take."

Jack turned to him, then dug the pencil into the rough centre of the circle. "Do you know what's in the middle of it?" He didn't get an answer, so he answered it himself. "Loleta."

"So?" Grady asked.

"iSo,/i" Jack went on with a glare, "the next areas to be hit will probably be within ten miles of Loleta. Why are you so stupid?"

"iJack/i."

It was the only thing Rachel had said to him all week. They'd had another fight about children. Jack was seriously wishing the human race reproduced asexually. He turned back to the map with a curl of his lip, sucking on his cheek.

"If you're saying you're the real target here, why circle around Loleta instead of just coming after you?"

"I'm not saying I'm the target. I'm saying this is a great big mind fuck, and I'm going to kill this asshole the first chance I get. Someone's decided to get knife-happy, and what better way to get away with it than to make it seem like I've got something to do with it? Gets the attention off of them, you know? I'd do the same thing. Circle around, getting closer and closer . . . maybe stop for a few months to let them catch their breath, then show up in their living room after they get home from work and have some fun." He moved to his lower lip, gnawing the scar tissue there, too. "If they know where I live, then they know who I'm married to . . . and maybe they're hoping I'll get so damned paranoid that I'll snap and start killing people again." He shrugged. "I mean, it's what iI'd/i have done. Who's going to worry about a few little murders when the Joker's blowing shit up, yeah? Ugh, but I'd do it somewhere bigger, make the trail more complicated, pictures inside pictures . . ." He was drawing again, pinpointing towns and making a connect-the-dots picture with them. Then Jack shook his head as Rachel coughed and turned back to the detectives, twirling the pencil in his fingers. "Wanna see a magic trick?"

"Maybe next time," Daniels finally said. Jack shrugged and tossed the pencil onto the table, then clasped his hands behind his back and tilted his head at the two men. "We'll call the towns in the area, let them know to be on the lookout for new people around, maybe put a curfew into place."

"They weren't killed right away," Jack said suddenly. He'd sat and put his heels up on the table, then dropped them with a frown when Rachel shoved at his legs.

"We know that."

"No, no, they were held somewhere. Somewhere . . . at least two rooms. Maybe three. Maybe not a house, a shack possibly . . . but big enough for this guy to hide out in, kill them in. Out of the way. Wouldn't be surprised if it was a bit of a drive into nowhere. I mean, more into nowhere." The two detectives stopped gathering papers and looked at him, but Jack found his fingers to be entirely engrossing. "Might wanna check out any known hidey-holes for about twenty or thirty miles, or look for new ones, you know?"

"We don't have that sort of manpower, Mr. Dawes."

Jack yawned and shrugged. "Yeah, well, that's just my professional opinion. I don't care if more girls go missing."

"And if he nabs your wife?"

Cold brown eyes met hard blue eyes. "Then I find him myself, and I kill him." There was silence for a few moments, then Jack's face split into a huge grin. "But that won't happen, 'cause I'm sure you're all working diligently on this case." Rachel was tugging at his arm with apologies, and Jack hung back at the door, grinning at them. "Oh, yeah, just one more thing . . . do you know how _easy_ it is to buy off the police? Just wondering," he called as Rachel managed to get him out the door.

"Would you _please_ stop baiting those men?" she snapped, not looking behind her as she dragged him out of the building and to the car. "Do you want to be a suspect? They'll lock you up, you idiot."

"Oh, can't have _that_," he muttered. "Bad food, no sex . . . hey, sort of like what I've got at home these days! Might not be so bad, after all."

Rachel turned on him and jabbed her index finger into his chest. He normally would have winced for her benefit, but this time he just frowned at her. "Look, _Jack_, I am under _no_ obligation to fuck you, _especially_ when I'm mad at you!"

"If they lock me up, maybe you'll have time to calm the fuck down."

"I don't need to calm down! Why should I be calm, when my husband's trying to get himself arrested just because I won't bend to every demand he makes?!"

"I'm not trying to get arrested," Jack said mildly. "I'm just being helpful."

She yanked her door open and snarled at him. "Be _helpful_ in ways that _aren't_ going to make them think it was you! You're such an asshole, I don't know why I put up with you."

That made him pause as he slid in and buckled up, then he looked at Rachel. She was gripping the steering wheel firmly, glaring out the window and ignoring him and his stomach was clenching in a way that almost made him nauseous. She hadn't meant that. Of course not. She was just upset. Jack swallowed a couple of times before he felt that his voice would be steady enough to not give away his sudden inner shaking.

"I'll leave them alone, then." There. That sounded normal, didn't it? Rachel glanced at him, maybe surprised that he'd given in so easily, and Jack tried a lopsided smile. "Hey, I know which side my bread's buttered on." Wasn't working. Something else. "Y'know, I know I've been a jerk for a while ---"

"The whole of your life," she muttered.

Jack persevered. "--- but, look, I'm sorry, Rachel. I'll . . . think about a kid. I will. I promise." If that would stop this talk about not wanting him, he'd put serious consideration into procreating.

She was quiet. Jack had just started tapping his feet when she spoke again. "Are you afraid, Jack?"

"Of what?" he asked quickly.

"Of having children."

His palms were getting sweaty and his heart was pounding. "Why would I be afraid?"

Rachel shook her head. "No, I guess you wouldn't . . . We're having dinner with Jeff and Veronica tonight. Thomas and his wife will be there, too."

"I can only handle so many police officers in one day . . . we got everything for the salad?" he asked quickly when her lips twitched. "I used the last of the sour cream on my potato last night."

"You used that entire thing of sour cream on _one_ baked potato?"

He shrugged and licked his lips. "Well . . . I had a couple of burritos, too. They were too hot; you know I don't like it when they're hot."

"Ugh . . ."

Jack grinned and put his hand on her knee. "Come on, we'll buy some whipped cream, too."

"I'm still not having sex with you, Jack."

"Never said anything about sex; I just want to lick whipped cream off of you."

Rachel glared at him. "I'm still upset with you."

He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. "So? Doesn't mean I can't lick whipped cream off of you."

"That's _exactly_ what it means."

Jack groaned. "So, what, are you not going to have sex with me until I agree to have a kid? That's shitty."

"That's not what I'm doing," Rachel protested. "It's just hard to be in the mood when you're being an ass."

"And if I'm not being an ass, I'm trying to knock you up. I can't win, really."

"Look, be nice tonight, all right? _You_ can be reclusive, but _I_ have to see these people every day. Don't talk about the past, don't talk about knives, don't talk about explosives ---"

"Hey, hey, hey," Jack interrupted, "I get it, all right? I get it. Don't talk about anything remotely interesting."

Rachel's voice was soft. "Jack, I know you don't want to go tonight, but they were kind enough to invite _both_ of us. Veronica specifically included you. People want to get to know you."

"They want to either gawk at the man who used to be the Joker, or they want to assure themselves that I'm not going to flip out."

"What's wrong with that? If the Riddler were reformed and moved to town, wouldn't _you_ want to get to know him, to make sure he wasn't going to kill me?"

He sucked on his teeth loudly for a moment. "I hate it when you make sense."

Rachel laughed a little. "Well, one of us has to." She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. "If you're good tonight, I'll pick up some whipped cream on the way home tomorrow."

"I will be _perfect_," Jack promised.

"And you'll think about a baby?"

He made a face but nodded. "Yeah, I'll think about it."

"Seriously think about it. Not just think you don't want one and then say no."

He lay his head on the headrest and closed his eyes. "I will studiously weigh all the pros and cons have us having a baby, and then get back to you about it."

Rachel's smile was obvious in her voice. "Good."

***

"Rachel, Jack. You're a little late, aren't you?" Veronica was smiling as she opened the door, and Rachel glared at Jack. He just grinned.

"I'd forgotten why I never take Jack to the store. He's got ADD or something. I spent more time telling him to put things back than actually shopping."

The leggy blonde laughed as she showed them in. "That's understandable. Must be why you're so good with the kids, right, Jack?"

She leaned over the kitchen counter as he set the bowl of fruit salad on it, and as soon as his eyes hit the hem of her low-cut blouse Jack shifted them to Rachel with a shrug. "Something like that. Five cup fruit salad." He opened the lid, showing Veronica the contents. "It's got vegan sour cream, but it still tastes good."

"Five cups of _what_?" she asked, leaning farther over the counter, which pulled her blouse down even more.

Jack swallowed and ticked off the ingredients with his fingers one at a time. "Sour cream, marshmallows, coconut, mandarin oranges, and pineapple." Then he coughed when she smiled up at him, her curls falling into her face. "Well. I added a few things to it."

"Jack's concept of making this salad is putting in whatever he thinks will taste good. Five cups is just a minimum," Rachel said with a laugh as she hugged Jack's arm briefly. He took that opportunity to hug her waist and press his nose into her hair, kissing her forehead when she looked up at him.

"Well, I can hardly wait to try it." Veronica straightened and walked to the patio door, opening it to the smell of cooking meat. "Jeff, is the steak ready? Rachel and Jack are here."

"Almost," he called back. "Come on out, have a beer!"

"_Socialising_," Jack muttered under his breath as he followed Rachel outside, making it sound like a bad word. He had to squeeze past Veronica and it didn't help to have his arm brush against her bosom. He fought the urge to rub it as he smiled slightly at Jeff and the other couple on the patio. He set the salad on the wooden table when Rachel directed him to it, then took the beer that Thomas handed him. "Thanks."

"No problem," the lieutenant told him. "Glad you could make it. How have you been, Jack?"

"Uhh . . . good." Jack took a drink and then looked at Rachel, who had sat next to the man's wife. She had given birth a few months ago, and cradled the small baby in her arms. He groaned at the look on Rachel's face as she took the baby. She looked so damned _happy_ with the tiny creature in her arms, kissing it's forehead gently and cooing at it.

"Oooh, she's feeling the baby urges, eh?" Thomas asked as he followed Jack's gaze.

"How do I get her to _stop_?"

The other man laughed, slapping Jack's back and Jack jumped at the contact. "You have a baby. Sorry, Jack, that's about all that'll help."

"I don't _want_ a kid, though." He took a swig of his beer and looked away when Rachel looked at him, hoisting the baby in the air as it giggled. "Would _you_ trust me with a baby?"

"Me?" Thomas snorted as he took a drink of his beer. "I don't know about a baby, but I've seen how you are with your dance class, and I heard you single-handedly stopped Janet Mills from starving herself. Now, I don't know you very well, but I think you'd be a good dad. Especially with Rachel there to help." He took another swig and shrugged. "Just my opinion."

"I was hoping you'd be on _my_ side," Jack muttered.

"And a year ago I would have been. But man, I'm telling you, watching Helna get bigger and bigger, seeing the ultrasound . . . I tell you, when I first felt Mitzi move, I thought I'd died and gone to heaven. That little girl's my pride and joy, man."

Jack turned slightly to look over his shoulder again. The baby was curled up on Rachel's shoulder, sucking her thumb contentedly, and he turned back to Thomas as his gut clenched.

"Yeah, I'd probably kill it on accident."

"You want one, don't you?" Thomas snorted a little as Jack looked up in surprise. "Not hard to see, Jack." He hesitated, then pursed his lips and leaned closer. "You're afraid you'll abuse the kid?" Jack nodded. "Can't figure out how to tell Rachel that that's why you don't want one?" Another wary nod. Thomas shook his head as he sighed. "My old man beat on me and my mother all the time," he said quietly. "I always thought I'd turn out like him, so I tried to keep kids out of the picture with Helna. She knew it from the start, but it took a long time before I could talk about it with her, and even longer before she convinced me that I wouldn't hurt our kids like I'd been hurt." He coughed, and neither man was looking at the other as he went on. "I'll tell you something, though. Your woman's your life support, man. She's there for you no matter what, and she's not going to stop loving you even when you know you don't deserve her. Women," he scoffed with admiration, raising his beer to his lips again as he watched his wife and daughter. "God created the universe is ascending order of holiness . . . is it any wonder He created _them_ last?"

His usual reply of being an atheist died before it reached his lips as Jack watched Rachel hand little Mitzi back to her mother, cheeks glowing with happiness. His hands clenched as he fought back an only recently familiar longing, and then Veronica was sitting so close to him that their thighs touched, draping her am over his shoulder and leaning in close with a giggle.

"Isn't little Mitzi _pre_cious?" she asked. She either didn't notice Jack stiffening or she ignored it, the hand on his opposite shoulder stroking it very, very slightly. "I bet you're not getting any sleep, Tom."

The man laughed and shook his head. "None at all."

"I wish you'd come into town more often, Jack," the woman went on, her breath warm on his cheek. Jack was slowly starting to relax. "Or are you only allowed out on Saturdays?"

"Uh . . . I can come into town whenever I want. There's just . . . stuff to do at home." Yeah, away from people. He liked her perfume.

"Really? We just added this patio. I don't recall you ever coming into the hardware store."

He faced straight ahead, but Jack's eyes slid to her gently moving fingers on his shoulder. "Yeah, well, there's stuff to use at home."

"Handyman, is that it? I think that's marvellous; Jeff hired Bob to do the patio --- he's the local contractor."

"Well, it's nothing I can't do myself, and if I need help I'll ask for it." Jack shrugged, uncomfortably aware of how close Veronica was. "Just haven't needed help yet."

"Steaks're done!" Jeff announced.

"Oh, good, I'm _starving_," Helna replied. "Rachel, could you take Mitzi while I dish up?"

"I'd be glad to. Come here, sweety," Rachel crooned, her voice jumping an octave or so as she once again cuddled the baby to her. "Jack, will you get me some food?"

He was glad to get out of Veronica's embrace as he stood up. "Yeah, sure." Talk turned to mundane things as food was gathered and eaten, including the demolition of the old library. Rachel sat back and smiled as she held Mitzi in one arm and ate with the other, listening as Jack pointed out all the flaws in the current plans, telling the chief of police and his lieutenant how to easily, cheaply, and completely destroy the old building.

He was okay, she decided. A little stubborn, but . . . yeah, she'd keep him. She laughed to herself and watched Mitzi play with her fingers, carefully ignoring the looks Jack thought she didn't know he was giving her, smiling down at the baby.

*******

**A/N:** Oaky, Maggie Gyllenhaal (and therefore Rachel) has blue eyes. I couldn't find a set eye colour for her, however, when I started writing and the picture of her eyes I was looking at seemed to be green. So that's why they're green. I know it's a mistake, but I didn't want to go back over both fics to correct it, so Rachel gets green eyes. Shush and don't bother me about it.

Also, Tom's claim that God created the universe in ascending order of holiness, meaning from least holy to most holy, is a Jewish belief. It explains why men have so many restrictions placed on them in Judaism, and why women don't: men need all those rules just to get to the level of holiness that women begin at. Stick _that_ in your pipe and smoke it, dudes.

And, as always, I love my review monkeys. ^_^


	4. Chapter 4

"You're so cold, keep your, hand in mine. Wise men wonder while, strong men die . . ."

Rachel listened to the tenor downstairs while she packed, a smile on her face. He liked dark, violent music; this song was one of his favourites.

In the living room, Jack leaned his forehead against the window as he sang to himself. "You're so cold, but you, feel alive. Lay your hands on me, one last time . . . Show me how it ends, it's all right . . . Show me how defenceless you really are . . . Satisfied and empty inside . . . Well that's all right, let's give this another try . . ."

Fuck, Rachel was leaving the next day for California, and he couldn't go with her. It would be the second time in four years he'd gone an entire week without seeing her --- that damned vacation Bruce had sent her on had had him crawling the walls, desperate for contact with her. She'd called him every other day, but still, he couldn't _see_ her, couldn't _touch _her. And now she was doing it to him again. What was the big deal about that conference, anyway? Jack needed her on _this_ coast. Fucking lawyers, screwing his life up . . .

"It's all right . . . it's all right . . . it's all right . . . it's all right . . . it's all right . . . it's all right . . . it's all right . . ."

He'd put the song on repeat and now he slunk over to the stereo, turning it up. He honestly wasn't trying to guilt-trip Rachel; that was the last thing he needed. The tension had been increasing between them with each day he didn't give her an answer in regards to children, and he didn't want her to leave when she was mad at him. She responded to his advances only with extreme reluctance, which had never happened before, and Jack hadn't touched her except on accident in the last five days. Every time they tried to talk about it, it ended up in a fight, but he was hoping that for tonight, at least, before she left for a week, Rachel would willingly go to bed with him. He missed her touch, missed the pleasantly vacant look on her face when he'd done a particularly good job, missed being able to wrap his arms around her and just hold her against him. Now Rachel just pulled away or stiffened whenever he touched her

"If you find your family, don't you cry . . ."

Family. They could be a family. He could go with Rachel to the doctor's for a pregnancy test, hold her hand while they got the news.

"In this land of make believe, dead and dry . . ."

He could wake her up every morning with kisses dotted along her slowly expanding stomach, marvel at the new life they'd created together.

"You're so cold, but you, feel alive . . ."

He could hold a small baby in his arms, a baby with her green eyes and his curly hair, a baby who smiled and laughed for him, because of him.

"Lay your hands on me, one last time . . ."

He could go to those stupid childbirth classes with Rachel, hold her in his arms and rub her belly, feel their baby moving inside of her. He could massage her shoulders for her when she had to get up late at night to feed the baby, watch in awe as the small life suckled at her breast, hold them both against his chest and bask in their love.

The music faded but it didn't start again, and Jack turned to Rachel, standing by the stereo with the candles he'd lit flickering across her features. The shadows played softly against her tired face, reflected in her eyes as he slowly shuffled toward her. She wasn't walking away, which was an improvement, and Jack looked between the ground and her as he came to a stop.

He reached out for her hesitantly. "Rachel . . ." She didn't pull away when his fingers curled around her shoulders and that encouraged Jack. He pulled her close and shivered with gladness as he wrapped his arms around her, pressing kisses into her hair while she leaned into his embrace. She rested her hands at his hips and then slid them back and up, holding on to his shoulders and tilting her head up to kiss him, and Jack was lost. It was the first bit of affection he'd gotten in what seemed like forever and he savoured it, moulding his body against hers while he covered her mouth with his, waited for her to push their lips together before fully responding. His heart was pounding; he was as nervous as he'd been when he'd first kissed her, first invited her into his and Harleen's bedroom. He didn't want to screw this up, so he reached out and found the right button on the stereo, pushing it before turning the sound back up.

Soft, slow music filled the air around them, and Jack started swaying in time with it as he kissed Rachel. It was an older song that she found incredibly sappy and adored. Usually Jack just rolled his eyes at slow songs and refused to get up and dance with her, but he was making an exception tonight. Rachel sighed into their gentle kiss as he twirled her around the living room, then she pulled back and looked at him with eyes bright from unshed tears.

"Jack . . . are you being romantic?" she asked quietly.

He smiled down at her and cupped her cheek, brushing his thumb against it. "You deserve it."

"Why so sudden?"

Jack swallowed and licked his lips. "I don't want you to leave mad at me." Rachel glanced away as he went on. "I . . . I'll have an answer for you when you get back. I promise. I really can't stand the thought of not seeing you for a week when you're upset, and I just want to be with you tonight, without fighting."

She looked at him, fingers trailing along his cheek and he pressed into her touch as tears filled her eyes.

"I'm sorry, Jack."

That made his heart clench slightly. "What for?"

"I've been . . . taking this really hard, and ---"

"And I'm an asshole; we've been over this. Please, Rachel, not tonight. If we're okay tonight, I can survive a week without you . . ." He kissed her again, almost ready to crow with delight when her slender fingers moved to his shirt, unbuttoning it. It felt so _good_ to have her touching him again, to know that she still wanted him, still loved him. It wasn't just about the sex; Jack loved sex to be sure, and he loved that he knew just how to drive Rachel wild and she knew how to do the same for him, but what he'd been missing the most was the physical closeness between them, the comfort of simply touching. It had been ten years --- six with Harleen, and four with Rachel --- since he'd discovered that skin-on-skin contact with another human was something to be sought out, even if it was as small as holding hands. Both women had made him feel wanted, desired, had gotten him addicted to their touch, and Jack wasn't complaining.

"You're being a terrible sub about this all, anyway," he said quietly later, as Rachel held him tightly, body still quivering.

She laughed into his shoulder. "Well, you're being a terrible dom, not taking care of your sub's needs. Besides, I didn't sign anything that said I have to follow every single command you give me." She bit his shoulder and he pinched her rear, which made her squeak, and he laughed.

"And here I was, thinking you couldn't live without a good spanking once in a while."

She snorted, kissing the red nail marks she'd just left on his shoulders. Jack hummed with approval as he ran his hands over her back. "You're so narcissistic."

"Yeah, well. What's new?" Rachel laughed again and started to push herself off of him to lay down, but he tightened his grip. "Hey, where are you going? I'm not done with you yet."

She raised her eyebrows at him, but he was busy covering her breasts with kisses. "I have to get up early, you know."

"And Thomas is giving us a ride to the airport; we can sleep in the car." She tried to push at his chest but he grabbed her hands and pulled one behind her back, clicking handcuffs on her wrist as he looked up with a grin. "C'mon, gumdrop."

"Jack, I really need to get to sleep." But she had tilted her head down to look at him through her eyelashes, a look that said that no matter what came out of her mouth to the contrary, she was willing to play with him.

"And _I_ really need to have sex with you. My ego's bigger, I win." She rolled her eyes and he lifted her off of his lap, his tongue flicking over his lips as he looped the handcuffs around the bars on the headboard, then secured her free wrist and grinned down at her. Rachel stuck her tongue out, which made him laugh. She was testing the handcuffs, pulling against them, arching her back and twisting her body, writhing on the sheets and for a few moments Jack could do nothing but stare at her. He knelt beside her and lowered his lips to her stomach, tracing patterns as he moved up her torso, over and across her breasts and up her throat, biting gently enough that she moaned and leaned into the contact, finally reaching her lips as Rachel panted from his kisses alone. It was good to know that he hadn't been the only one missing the intimacy of their relationship.

Rachel finally got to sleep an hour later.

***

"Is she all right?" Thomas asked as Jack carried Rachel to the car.

He grunted an affirmative, bonking his head with a wince as he leaned down to slide her in the back seat. "Damn it. Didn't get much sleep." There was still a smile on her face, and Jack looked up at Thomas as he got in after her. The man was trying not to grin. "What's so funny?"

"Absolutely nothing," was the reply. He watched Jack buckle his wife up, then himself, and then pull her tightly against him and kiss her temple. "Things better between you two?"

"For now." Rachel hadn't woken up when Jack had gotten her dressed, and she didn't seem like she would be waking any time soon. "I have to give her a definite yes or no when she comes back."

"My advice? Toss the birth control and get knocked up."

"I know," Jack replied with a glare. The two men had been talking with each other without really talking with each other, edging into a sort of hesitant friendship. It helped that Helna had taken a liking to Jack and started inviting him and Rachel over to dinner. Rachel had reacted by inviting the other couple over to dinner, so for the past two weeks, Jack's privacy had been invaded five times. Not that he was one to hold a grudge or anything, and Rachel having girl-talk with Helna had given him and Tom the opportunity to not discuss the effects of an abusive past on being a father and other topics, but still. He could have been sulking if they hadn't insisted on ruining his perfectly bad moods.

"And . . . ?"

"And what? I'm not giving _you_ an answer before I give Rachel an answer. Shit, I've still got a lot to think about, you know?" His voice got lower as his eyebrows furrowed. "Plus there's those murders."

Tom was silent for a while. "You think they're after you and Rachel?"

"I . . . possibly."

"Any idea who it might be?"

Jack snorted. "Too many possibilities to start guessing. Ignoring the mob, there's, oh, the whole of Gotham for starters. Not to mention any nut job across the country who's decided to become the next Joker. I fucking _hate_ copycat killers. I mean, plagiarism may be the highest form of flattery, but I _liked_ being unique." He looked up at the police officer and cleared his throat. "Well. Past tense."

"And if you have a baby on the way ---"

Jack shuddered. "I don't even want to _think_ about it. Word gets out Rachel's knocked up . . . no. No, no, and _hell_ no." He cuddled her to him, tucking the blanket he'd bundled her in around her more tightly as her head rested on his chest. "I couldn't do that to a kid, you know? Rachel picked a really bad time to bring this up."

"No argument there. Still, it's not like you're completely defenceless, Jack."

He raised his eyebrows. "What do you want me to do? Be the Joker again to protect my wife and kid? Sorry, but the Joker doesn't work like that. He'd probably kill Rachel just for the hell of it."

"That's not what I meant," Tom said. "You and Rachel are respected members of the community. Well, Rachel is," he amended when Jack snorted, "and half the women in town would lynch the police department if we let anything happen to _you_."

Now Jack was puzzled. "Huh?"

"Don't tell me that you honestly haven't noticed that almost every woman in this damned town wants you, Jack."

Jack's brow smoothed out. "Oh, yeah. That. I've noticed." There was a smirk on his face, fully self-satisfied and unrepentant about his sex appeal. "Must kill 'em that I don't sleep around."

Tom rolled his eyes at his semi-friend's ego. "Yeah, well, let me give you a list of the women to avoid while Rachel's out of town. Some of them, man, will try to get in your pants every minute she's away."

"And why's that bad?" He got a wide-eyed stare and shrugged. "_I'm_ not going to put out, so let them try."

"That ego's going to get you in trouble one day, Jack."

"It gets me in trouble all the time. Why do you think I sleep on the porch swing so much?" He grinned and kissed Rachel's hair gently. "She always forgives me."

"Yeah, well, trust me on this, Jack. I've seen you flirt with other women and I know you're not serious, but someone like Veronica flirting with you over dinner is very different than her trying to get you to have sex with her. There's a difference, a _huge_ difference, and you'd do best to stay as far away from a woman serious about an affair as you possibly can. Rachel will be _pissed_ if you lead someone on to think they're actually going to sleep with you, whether or not you had any intentions of doing so."

"She's one to watch, then, is she?" Jack mused. He wasn't surprised. She'd been eyeing him more and more as the tension between him and Rachel mounted, and she'd managed to find him and strike up a conversation almost every time he'd been in town the past two weeks.

"You didn't hear it from me," Tom said firmly. "I'm sure Helna will give you an earful of advice when you come to dinner tonight. You _are_ showing up, yes?"

"I promised Rachel I'd be sociable," was the reply. "Y'know, my first wife's parents were Jewish."

That got Tom started in on Judaism, which meant he wasn't bothering Jack about keeping his dick in his pants --- not that he needed telling. Now that Rachel wasn't mad at him any more, there was no need to sleep around. And there hadn't been a need in the first place. Jack had told her once that he wasn't going to drop her if a better offer came along, and in his mind, there _was_ no better offer.

Well. Maybe if she had a twin sister, and he could have both of them at once . . .

Their arrival at the airport brought Jack out of his pleasant daydreams, and he unbuckled Rachel before unwrapping her, kissing her firmly.

"Hey, Tinkerbell, wake up. Time to get on an air plane and go get sunburned."

Rachel yawned and stretched, then blinked up at Jack. "Hm?"

He smiled at her and kissed her again. "Hurry up, before I sneak into your checked baggage, lollipop. You don't want me to pop out at your law convention thing, do you? I'll be naked."

She was laughing, holding on to his arm tightly as she got out of the car. "Jack, you got me dressed?"

"Well, I might have forgotten to put panties on you or something, but yeah." Her eyes got wide and he grinned at her as Tom helped him with her luggage. "Don't recall if I took them out of your bags, either. Might wanna check that out when you get to San Francisco."

"Jack, you didn't!" She glared at his smile and clenched her thighs together tightly. "You're an asshole."

They'd gotten to the tiny terminal gate and he pulled her against him. He tried not to cling, tried to kiss her like he was going to see her in a few hours, but Tom had to cough politely to get him to let her go and he pulled away with extreme reluctance. Rachel hugged him with tears in her eyes, then ran her fingers over his cheeks and kissed each one.

"I love you, Jack. It's only a week."

"You better call me every single day," he ground out as his own fingers dug into her hips.

"I will, I promise."

"Every night before you go to bed," he insisted. "And call me when you change flights, and when you get there."

She was smiling, letting him ramble at her. "Want me to call you on my lunch breaks?"

He nodded. "And when you wake up."

"Do you know how much our phone bill's going to be if I call you that much?"

Jack lowered his lips to her ear. "Not half as big as the welt on your ass is going to be if you don't." He reached down and cupped said ass, squeezing quickly before Rachel jerked away. She shook her finger at him and he just grinned past the pain in his chest. "Now go away, before I drag you back home."

She stepped close for another kiss and he returned it quickly, then Rachel thanked Tom and slung her purse over her shoulder, taking her laptop case from Jack. He watched as she went through the minuscule security checkpoint, then she turned around at the gate.

"I love you!" she called.

He couldn't let her leave without telling her. "I love you, too," Jack called back, and the delighted smile on her face was worth the effort it had taken to get the words out. Then she was gone and Jack insisted on waiting until the plane took off before he and Tom left the airport, watching as it disappeared into the early morning haze. Then he turned as the other man slung an arm around his shoulders.

"Relax, man. It's only a week."

"Yeah, well, let's go before I chase after the damned thing." Jack slid into the passenger seat and grabbed the blanket from the back, holding it to his face and inhaling Rachel's scent deeply. "Mmm . . ."

Tom laughed as he backed out of the parking space. Jack was wrapped around Rachel's little finger. There was no way he would be able to tell her he didn't want a kid.


	5. Chapter 5

The thing was crying softly, more of a whimper as it shifted around. Jack glanced around, then poked his head into the kitchen, but Tom and Helna weren't there. He was outside, and she was . . . she'd gone to get a book she thought he might enjoy. The volume increased and Jack crept over to the rocking swing, peering down at the squirming girl-thing. That thing, the thing it had been sucking on, had fallen out and he pursed his lips as he considered his options.

"Hey, shut up." That didn't work; of course not. The girl-thing wasn't able to comprehend speech yet, much less follow an order. He stared at the sucky thing and then wiped his fingers off on his jeans, idly remembering something about germs and new squirming things not mixing well, then leaned down and picked it up with two fingers, making a face as he tried to get the now-crying girl-thing to suck on it once more. After a moment, small lips puckered around it and the thing sucked fervently, as if making up for lost time. "Yeah. Good job."

He crouched down and watched the girl-thing for a while, tilting his head this way and that, drawing closer, then pulling back. He lowered his head to its feet to examine them, then got really close and sniffed it. Didn't smell too bad, he decided. Of course, sometimes these creatures smelled horrible. As long as _he _didn't have to fix _that_ problem, and someone else fixed it quickly, that was fine by him. Small blue eyes, but huge in comparison to the rest of its head, watched him intently as the girl-thing sucked, tiny hands curling and uncurling as if it was looking for something to hold on to. Curious, Jack poked one itty-bitty palm with his pinky, jerking a little in surprise when the girl-thing grasped it with surprising strength. He tried to pull away, but it didn't let go and he didn't know how much pressure would to hurt it, so he folded his legs and sat cross-legged in front of it, letting the motion of the swing draw his arm back and forth, back and forth.

"You're tiny," he told the girl-thing. He couldn't quite recall if it had a name. "I mean, you're really tiny. But you're huge at the same time. Look at your eyes, all buggy and big, and your mouth? Completely out of proportion. And what about your cheeks, huh? Puffy things. You look ridiculous. You've got a big pot belly, and your arms and legs are scrawny." It regarded him calmly, still sucking on its treat thing, and he stared back with a frown. "You're not cute at all, you know. You're just . . . compact. Why is it that the smaller and more compact something is, the more women love it? I mean, it doesn't work with _every_thing --- penises come to mind --- but really, look at you. You think just because you have those big huge eyes in that teeny-tiny face, you're going to get fed and cuddled?" He sighed. "Yeah, guess you do, huh? Well, whatever works, right?"

Out in the hallway, tears of laughter were streaming down Helna's face as she frantically gestured for Tom to be quiet and come join her. He was puzzled until he started listening, then he started grinning and shaking with laughter.

"Now, let me tell you a thing or two," Jack went on as the swing came to a slow stop. "Men? Pigs, all of them. Stay away from them, all right? They only want one thing, and when you're old enough to understand, you'll appreciate my next bit of advice. Ge a knife. A big one. Learn to use it. Get a gun, too, and when some horny dickhead asks what you're doing that night, tell him you'll be home, sharpening your knives and cleaning your .44." The girl-thing started fussing, so he got up and pursed his lips a bit before gently easing it out of the swing and holding it in both hands, fingers supporting it's scrawny neck, then he brought it close to his chest and it rested it's head on his shoulder. It had stopped fussing, so he figured he'd gotten the holding thing down correctly from watching Tom and Helna hold it.

"Develop talents, lots of them, and don't _ever_ do something for free if you're good at it. Make your own clothes, kid, it'll save you a lot of money and they'll fit much better than off-the-rack shit. And do you know how many times Rachel's jumped my bones because my pants are perfectly tailored to fit me? But you're staying away from men, so that doesn't count. Unless you turn out to be a lesbian, in which case, all women are crazy and you should stay away from them, too." He sighed as it hiccuped and started walking around the living room. "Not everything burns, either, which is important to know. Potassium nitrite? Fizzles wetly. Potassium nit_rate_, on the other hand, makes a _very_ nice boom."

The two in the hallway were almost rolling on the floor with muffled laughter, trying not to disturb the life lecture their daughter was receiving.

"Don't let _anyone_ tell you you're not good enough for something. Unless you aren't, in which case you have to work hard to _become_ good at it. Practice makes perfect in everything. And if you can, marry a man who's dumber than you are, which, if you take my advice, won't be hard to do. Men are idiots as well as pigs, and you need to be able to outsmart them in everything. And don't underestimate the persuasive power of sex. We men will do just about _any_thing to get laid, which is why I painted that damned house all by myself last summer. Now, you seem like you might grow up to be cute; your parents are certainly good looking, but you can't count on that. If you're cute, men will think you're dumb, but if you're also _smart_, well, see where I'm going with this? And even if you're perfectly capable of lifting, moving, or doing something by yourself, if a man wants to help you, let him; it means less work for you. I know some women would get offended by that, but think about it: there's some horny guy thinking he's getting laid for moving that big crate for you, but you never promised anything, just smiled real pretty and gushed about how strong he is, then thank him, get in your car and drive off. _He's_ the dumb-ass that thought you would put out."

He cleared his throat and bounced the girl-thing a little, its small body warm along his chest and shoulder, his arm resting securely against its back. He rather liked the tiny heartbeat he could feel. "Speaking of, _never_ put out unless _you_ want to, and ialways/i tell him exactly what to do and how to do it. And a guy buying you drinks or dinner doesn't obligate you to have sex with him; if it did, that would be prostitution. Don't ever be a prostitute. And the first guy to try to smack you around? Kill him. Don't take crap from _anybody_." Jack chewed on his inner cheek as he thought. "I think that's about it for now. Where'd your parental units get off to? If they're having sex and leaving me to watch you, I'm not going to be happy."

Helna appeared in the doorway, wiping at her eyes with a grin. "I'm sorry that took so long, Jack." She looked him over as he turned, a slightly guilty look on his face as he was caught holding the baby without permission. "You look so sweet together," was all she said as she waved the book in the air, giggling. "Here you go, _The Colour of Magic_. Is everything all right?"

"Uh . . . yeah," he said, then cleared his throat. "It was making noise. I don't know why."

"She," and the pronoun was stressed slightly, "does that. Babies get lonely, just like everyone else. Mitzi just wanted to be held."

"Oh. It ---"

"She."

"She just wanted to be held," Jack repeated.

"Don't you ever just want a hug?" Helna asked as she walked over. Jack tried to hand her the girl-thing, but the mother didn't take it, only smiled up at the now-sleeping infant.

"Well . . . yeah."

"So why should babies be different? Think about it: you're warm and safe and snuggled up tight in your own tiny world for nine months, then all of a sudden you're thrust out into a big place where it's cold and bright and loud and scary; of course you'd want to be comforted now and then."

He licked at his scars as she smiled up at him. "Never thought about it."

That prompted a laugh. "I didn't think you had. Where'd you learn to hold a baby?"

"Am I doing it wrong?"

Helna laughed again as she brushed her fingers across Mitzi's head. "No, you're doing it great."

"Good. I just watched you and Tom hold her. I'm a fast learner. Uh, she wouldn't let my finger go."

"And you always let Rachel's hand go?"

"But I'm not a baby," he protested.

Helna gave him an 'Oh, _really_?' look. "Not chronologically, at least. Are you ready for dinner?"

Jack shifted and cleared his throat. "Yeah. You want it back?" He tilted his head toward the baby.

"_Her_, Jack, and only if you're done holding her." Helna turned and walked into the kitchen, Jack following her. "Tom, why don't you dish up Jack's plate for him." They were both grinning.

"Something funny?" Jack asked as he sat down, still holding the baby against him.

"Oh, inside joke," Tom replied cheerfully. "Mitzi likes you; she doesn't normally let strangers hold her."

He glanced at the baby as Tom and Helna murmured over their first bites of food, some Jewish custom he vaguely remembered Harleen doing from time to time. "Well, I think we have an understanding." He took a bite of his own food, eating left-handed. "She's a good kid. Not too noisy."

That made Tom howl with laughter and Helna choked on her water a little. "An understanding, huh? Does that mean you're free to babysit?"

"Hell no," Jack replied. "Make Janet do it. She likes kids."

Helna frowned as she ate. "Speaking of, Tom, how are those girls doing? I saw Mary the other day and she looked awful. Are those girls safe living with her?"

He pursed his lips. "No one's complained to us," he said after a moment, referring to the police. "I can't do anything unless there's a registered complaint." He didn't look happy about it and Jack cleared his throat.

"I told her she could call me and Rachel if she ever needed anything. I don't mind," he said at their surprised looks. "I've just got this phobia, see, of crying women. Can't stand it. Plus Rachel would kill me if I didn't help out." He rolled his eyes slightly. "She's teaching me compassion through fear, I think."

"That's wonderful of you to do that for Janet and Susie," Helna said with a beaming smile. He shrugged. "I know they both really like you. It's . . . it's good that they have a positive male figure in their lives again."

This time it was Jack nearly choking on his steak. "_Me_? A positive figure? I don't think so, Helna."

"Oh, you are," Tom put in as he covered his wife's hand with a smile. "You really are. Janet's standing up to the bullies at school, and she never used to do that. And I hear that Susie's been helping out at home more, because you told her she needs to be strong for Mary."

"I needed to tell her _something_ to stop her from crying," Jack replied stubbornly. He wasn't about to take credit for anything, and Tom and Helna exchanged knowing looks.

"Well," Tom went on, "there's a new fad of eating going around the teenage girls, because you also mentioned that you like women with curves. Cathy just about had a fit when her friends stopped that group diet they were all on."

"Group diet? That girl's going to fall in with a cult, one of these days," Jack muttered. "Drink the Kool-Aid, guys, and don't worry about that funny after taste."

His hosts snickered at that. "That's terrible," Helna said.

"But it's true." Jack paused to chew his steak, recalling Rachel's admonition to pay attention to how messy he was when he ate and making sure his mouth stayed closed. "Hey, can I file a harassment charge against her? She grabbed my ass the other day, and I felt violated. Had to take a hot shower and scrub myself raw when I got home."

They were laughing again. "She is rather, ah . . ."

"Promiscuous?" Jack offered. "Disease-ridden?"

"I'll go with promiscuous," Tom said. "Sad, but true."

"So," Helna said brightly, in a deliberate attempt to change the subject, "summer's coming up soon. Who's up for a camping trip?"

Jack held Mitzi all through the meal, only giving her back when Helna needed to feed her. He was standing on the back patio talking with Tom when his phone went off. It wasn't Rachel's ring tone, and he frowned at the local number.

"Yeah?" he asked after he'd flipped the phone open.

"J, Jack?" There was a sniffle. "It's Janet."

He frowned. "What's wrong?"

Her voice was very small, and it was obvious she was still crying. "I . . . c-can me and Susie come over, please?"

"Uh . . . I'm not at home right now." Tom was raising his eyebrows questioningly. "Are you two all right?"

"Mom . . . Mom locked the door and we can't get it. I'm sorry, Jack, I'm really sorry, it's just . . . we've been out here for an hour, and ---"

"Hey, hey, listen. I'm at the Fine's place. Do you live close to them?"

"We'll go get them," Tom told him as he went inside.

"Uhm, I don't think so . . ." She was trying _so_ hard not to cry, and Jack swore to himself that if he ever saw that worthless mother of hers again, he'd kill her slowly and painfully.

"All right, Tom and I are coming to get you, okay? Janet, okay?"

Now she was sobbing, and he could hear Susie crying, too, as Tom beckoned him and he followed the officer to the car. "O, okay. I'm so sorry . . ."

"Don't be sorry," Jack told her firmly. "It's not your fault."

"B, but Mom said to go get some milk, and not be late, and when we got back, she'd locked the door and she won't open it . . . she was tired, she said, I think she's sleeping . . ."

"Then you'll stay over at my place tonight," Jack said. "Janet, _calm down_. You're probably scaring Susie."

That made her gulp back a the next few tears as Tom spoke. "Ask her how often this happens."

"How often does this happen, Janet?"

"Th, that Mom forgets to leave the door unlocked?"

"Yeah."

She was on the verge of tears again. "N, not often . . . a couple times a month . . ."

"Couple times a month," he relayed.

Tom was frowning, but then, so was Jack. "What about forgetting to pick them up from somewhere?"

"How often does she forget to pick you two up?"

Janet's voice was alarmed. "I don't want to get Mom in trouble! Please, Jack, don't get Mom in trouble?"

"Answer me, Janet," he said firmly. "Answer me _now_."

She burst into tears again as Tom pulled into her long driveway. "Once or twice a week . . ."

His lip curled in distaste. "Once or twice a week."

"Mm." The two girls were huddled on the steps of the Victorian house together, and as soon as the car had stopped Susie ran up and pounded on Jack's door, tears falling down her plump cheeks.

"Jaaaack," she sobbed as he opened the door, flinging herself at him. "Mommy hates us!"

He held her tightly as Tom got out and started talking with Janet in a low voice. "She doesn't hate you, poppet," he assured her, but even to _his_ ears, it sounded strained and fake. "She's just not feeling well."

And how was this any different, his mind asked him, than watching Janet starve herself and saying 'My, Janet's looking a mite thin these days, don't you think?'? He was still lying, still pretending everything was fine when it wasn't, and wasn't going to _be_ fine until something drastic happened. The small girl quivered in his arms and he took his jacket off, wrapping her up in it and pulling her into his lap as Tom pounded on the front door. Janet slumped over to the car, her eyes red and puffy.

"Get in," Jack told her as Susie curled against his chest, her small hands clutching at his shirt. He really wished Rachel were here to help; he didn't know how to comfort these children. He watched as the front door finally cracked open, and really wished he could get his hands on that stupid bitch. Mary was obviously still drunk and after a few minutes of yelling and crying at whatever Tom was saying, screamed something at the car and slammed the door. Susie buried her face in his chest and whimpered, and Janet curled in on herself.

"You don't mind them staying with you tonight?" Tom asked as he got back in.

"'Course not. Rachel's out of town." Tom raised his eyebrows and Jack frowned as he tried not to say that the girls wouldn't be disturbed by him and Rachel having sex. "Uh . . . y'know, it's quiet there without her."

"Will it be a problem if they need to stay a few days?"

"I don't want Mom in trouble!" Janet burst out.

"Shut up," Jack told her. "I could use the company, I suppose."

"All right. Do me a favour?"

"Maybe."

Tom glared at him. "Would you be willing to file a formal complaint with the police department and CPS about this incident?"

Jack looked back at Janet in the rear view mirror, then down at Susie in his arms, and pursed his lips as he nodded. "Yeah." Janet was still sniffling, and he sighed. "Look, Janet, I know you don't want your mom to get in trouble, but she's not taking care of either of you."

"I don't want to be in foster care!"

"No one said anything about ---"

"If you call CPS, they'll take us away and put us in different homes!" Janet cried out, hurt and angry and scared. "It happens all the time! I'll never see Mom or Susie again!"

"And Rachel's a goddamn lawyer, Janet; she's not going to let CPS do that. What _is_ CPS?"

Janet snorted as Tom replied. "Child Protective Services. They investigate reports of child abuse and neglect."

"Oh." He was a little surprised that Tom was driving while Susie was still in his lap, but it was late and the officer was driving slowly. "Still, Rachel's not going to let you two get separated."

"Can we live with you and Miss Rachel?" Susie asked in a very tiny voice.

Jack's chest tightened and he hugged her. "That's not up to me, kiddo," he said past a dry throat. "Rachel and I . . . we've got some things going on, so you might not be able to. I think the courts decide that." He had no fucking clue about it, actually. "But we can have a slumber party tonight, and stay up way late, and drink lots and lots of soda and eat candy, all right? Everything Rachel won't let me do when she's home."

That made the little one giggle, and even Janet was trying not to smile. His phone went off as he and Tom were getting the girls settled into the downstairs bedroom.

"_I believe in miracles . . . Where're you from, you sexy thing? . . . I believe in miracles . . . since you came along, you sexy thing . . ._"

That made him perk up and he flipped his phone open with a grin. "Baby! I miss you already!" Then he winced; 'baby' was a button he didn't need to be pushing.

Rachel just laughed as Janet started snickering about his ring tone for her. "I miss you, too. How was dinner?"

"Uh, yeah, great." He walked out to the porch and closed the front door.

She was automatically suspicious. "'Uh, yeah, great'? What went wrong, Jack?"

"Geez, where's the trust? Honestly, dinner went fine. Tom and I had to go get Janet and Susie; they're staying here tonight. Other than that, every thing's fine."

"Janet and Susie? What happened? Are they all right, Jack?" Rachel was worried, and he could hear her tapping her fingers.

"They're just fine. Their mother forgot to leave the door unlocked when they went out for milk and probably passed out."

"But they're not hurt?"

"They're not hurt. Cold and a little hungry, but I've got that covered."

"Jack, you're amazing." Her voice was warm, and Jack wished she was with him to pat his head, rub his belly, and fuck him brainless for doing such a good job. "Thank you _so_ much for letting them stay over. Oh, sweety, I love you so much."

He coughed and rapped his knuckles on the porch railing. "Yeah, well, don't compliment me too much; we've got guests, and all." His whole body was warm now, and he knew he was grinning like a fool. "You can, uh, make it up to me later, all right?"

She laughed. "Oh, that reminds me. I forgot to refill my birth control before I left; will you get it filled for me, maybe on Wednesday?"

His eyes narrowed and he tried to find the trap in her request, but Jack found nothing. It wasn't the first timed he'd filled the prescription for her, anyway. "Yeah, sure, no problem."

"Thanks. I've got to get to dinner, but you're sure you're all right with the girls over?"

He licked his lips and nodded. "Yeah, we'll be fine. Maybe we'll order a pizza or something. The pizza place should still be open."

"I think it closes at ten-thirty; okay, sweety, I'll call you tomorrow."

"Before you go to bed," he reminded her.

Rachel sighed. "Fine, before I go to bed. I love you, Jack."

"Yeah. Talk to you later."

"Okay. Bye."

"Bye."

Tom was standing at the door when Jack turned around. "Cute ring tone."

"Rachel did it." He grinned and sat on the swing. "Want a beer?"

"No, I'm good. The girls need to get to school in the morning. I'll call and let the office know they're not to be punished for not having their homework with them. Ah . . . you don't have a license, do you?"

"Nope," Jack said cheerfully. "I walk, bike, or get driven everywhere. Janet can use Rachel's bike, and I can fit Susie with me; don't worry." Tom's eyes narrowed, but he shrugged.

"All right. Come by the station after you drop them off at school, all right? I'm sure Rachel will call first thing to ask what happened."

"Yeah, well, she's nosy. But I like her."

He got a grin. "I noticed. Well. Have a good night."

Jack nodded as he stood to go inside. "Yeah. You, too." He locked the door, then turned to the two girls sitting on his couch. "Who wants a pizza?"

"Pimeapple!" Susie squealed, and her mispronunciation made Jack laugh a little. "I want pimeapple, Jack!"

"All right, pimeapple it is. Janet?"

She still looked like she was on the verge of tears, but maybe they were tears of relief. "Uh, yeah, that's cool. Uhm, is extra cheese okay?"

"Yeah, I like cheese." He flipped through his contacts to find the phone number that Rachel had set. "Thick crust?"

"Yeah!" Susie put in, excited to be having a sleep over on a school night.

"Okay, then. There are some games in the hall closet upstairs, Janet. Second shelf only. Why don't you two find one we can play?" Yeah, kids liked games. _Jack_ liked games. They'd play, eat pizza, then go to bed. He could do this. He and Rachel had a game night every once in a while, after all, except tonight there wasn't going to be strip-anything. Oh, well. He'd cope, he decided as he ordered their pizza.

Then the girls were running back into the living room, bickering over which game to play first, and he decided maybe he'd cope with an aspirin or two.


	6. Chapter 6

"Shopping for Mary's girls, Jack? Jeff told me what happened last night; that's awfully sweet of you, to take them in. Jack? Jack!"

He roused himself from his contemplation of cantaloupes and their resemblance to Veronica's silicone-enhanced cleavage as the woman herself poked him in the shoulder. He turned to give her a wide-eyed look.

"Huh? Oh, yeah. It's no problem." He grabbed two or three and put them in the shopping cart, walking off quickly so she couldn't see his flushed cheeks, but Veronica kept up with him.

"So . . . are you and Rachel going to try to get custody of them if Mary can't keep them? Where _is_ Rachel?"

She took the milk he'd grabbed blindly and put a different brand in the cart. "Hey . . ."

"It's cheaper and better, trust me. So?"

"So, what?" He could smell her perfume, something floral.

"What about Janet and Susie?"

"Huh?" Her knee-length, form-fitting skirt and well-tailored silk blouse were distracting him. "Oh. Why should we take them? They're not our responsibility, and besides, I'm trying to _avoid_ having kids. Doesn't work too well if we take in someone else's offspring. And she's at a conference in California all week. Some lawyer crap."

She laughed like he'd been joking about not wanting to take in Janet and Susie, resting her hand on his bicep. "All week? I'm sorry to hear that. But you'd be a great father, Jack," Veronica said softly as she smiled up at him.

"Yeah, everyone says that _now_," he mumbled, avoiding her gaze. He looked at the list he'd scribbled down in a hurry, talking to himself as he went on. "Chunky peanut butter and raspberry jelly . . . what's wrong with creamy? Creamy's great, chunky just hurts my gums . . ."

Veronica was laughing again as her hand slid down to his wrist. "Ah, kids and their fickle tastes. I'm glad Jeff and I never had any; the twins are from his first marriage. Do you need help shopping?"

He really hated admitting that he needed help, so Jack just scowled and ignored her. Her perfume and the click of her high heels followed him, the warm weight of her hand on his wrist never wavering. He grabbed the smallest thing of chunky peanut butter he could find and used that motion as an excuse to get her hand off of him. Either she didn't get the hint that he wanted her to leave him alone, or she got the hint that he needed help, because after a while Veronica took the shopping list from him and clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth as she looked it over, then gently steered him in the right direction. Once they were up at the register, Veronica gasped softly and grabbed the newspaper.

"Oh, my God . . ."

"What?" Jack asked, interested.

"Two more girls went missing . . ." He pursed his lips and took the paper from her, skimming the article. It didn't give much information, but it didn't really have to. They both fit the same profile, they'd disappeared in a different town within ten miles of Loleta, and he knew how they'd end up. "God, Jack, this is scary. Aren't you worried?"

He was angry more than anything. Some asshole was fucking with his life and they were _not_ going to be happy if he ever found them. "A little. Look, thanks for the help and all, but I've got to get to the police station. Tom said he'd give me and the girls a ride home; my bike will fit in the back of his truck." It obviously wasn't the response she'd been looking for as Veronica blinked and move her lips silently in surprise. Jack didn't care. She could finger-bang herself to thoughts of him all day long, as long as she left his physical self out of it. Jack had just gotten out the sliding doors when Tom pulled up, and he grinned.

"Hey, Jack. All done?"

"You're a lifesaver, Tom," he replied. "Just finished. Veronica was kind enough to help out."

"I _am_ just in time, then." Tom rolled his eyes and Jack returned the gesture as they loaded the bags and his bike in the truck. "Hey, Veronica. How are you?"

"I'm fine," she said a little crossly. "How are Helna and Mitzi?"

It made Jack want to howl with laughter as she was forced by her societal niceties to stand there and be polite after he'd rejected her subtle advances, when it was obvious that all she really wanted to do was flounce away in a huff. A few years ago he would have been cackling merrily to himself rather than leaning out the window and grinning; maybe he was more acclimated than he'd feared.

"They're great, thanks."

"Hey, I've gotta call my wife," Jack couldn't resist putting in. He loved the way a muscle jumped in Veronica's cheek at the mention of Rachel. "Let's go."

"Sorry, Veronica, I'd love to chat, but . . ."

"It's no problem," she said cooly. "Have a good day, you two."

"We will. Bye!" Jack called as she _did_ flounce off, waving cheerfully before settling back in the seat and busting up. "Oh, oh shit," he laughed breathlessly as he wiped tears from his eyes. "Does Jeff know what a whore she is?"

Tom was laughing, too, even as he tried to frown. "I don't know, man, I don't know. Just don't go spreading tales, okay? Jeff doesn't need to find out from the rumour mill."

"Right. I hang around you, Helna, and pipsqueak grade-schoolers. That's my circle of acquaintances; not much gossip to be had there, unless you count who got invited to who's birthday party and who has the best Barbie."

That made his friend laugh as they drove to the grammar school to get Susie. "Right. I'll come to you for inside information when the next Barbie in town goes missing."

"Hey, I'm your undercover agent," Jack said, leaning out the window and letting the wind blow in his hair. It felt fantastic; it always did.

"Rachel ever compare you to a dog when you do that?"

"All the time," Jack called back in. They pulled up to the school and he waved at Susie, who was standing a little apart from the other children waiting to be picked up. "Susie! Hey, Susie!"

She looked around in surprise, then her whole face lit up when she saw him, and she started running toward the truck. "Jack! Jack, you came to get me!"

"Well, duh," he called back as he opened the door and got out, catching her as she flung herself at him and swinging her up and around. "I said I would, didn't I?"

"Mommy always says she'll do stuff, but then she doesn't," Susie replied as she hugged his neck. He returned the embrace and settled her on his hip, shaking a finger in her face as she giggled.

"Yeah, well, I'm not your mom, am I? I'm a man of my word, doll-face, and if I say I'm going to pick you up, I'm going to pick you up."

She was almost crying with joy. "I love you, Jack!" she exclaimed, giving him a big kiss on the cheek.

He couldn't look at her joy-filled face and not smile back, not return her kiss with a small one of his own as he hugged her. "I like you too, kid."

She clutched her backpack to her chest and grinned. "Wanna know what we did in class today?!"

He laughed as he buckled her in, then nodded. "Go for it. What'd you learn today?" He flipped his cell phone open and started a new text message as he listened with half an ear to Susie ramble, expressing interest when she waved a piece of paper at him that she'd scrawled on with crayons, pretending he could see that it was a picture of himself and absently promising that he'd put it on his fridge. He was chewing at the scar on his lip when he got a response, then nodded in satisfaction and turned his full attention to the little girl sitting next to him.

As they pulled up to the curb of the high school, Susie unbuckled and leaned out the window to yell at Janet at the top of her lungs. "Janet! Jack picked me up like he promised! We're gonna roast s'mores after my homework's done! Hurry, Janet!"

Jack winced and covered his ears. "Ow, hey, have a care for the ears, sugar. You'll make me go deaf."

"I'm sorry, Jack!" Susie took his face between her little hands and then kissed each ear. "Do they feel better?"

He hadn't been expecting the kisses and his ears were sensitive anyway. Jack looked at Tom quickly, somewhat mortified. The man was laughing.

"Uh . . . hey, yeah, they're all better. Thanks, moonshine. Just, uh, don't kiss them again, all right? They're a little, ah, sensitive." She started deflating and he tickled her. "How about you kiss my nose and it'll go to my ears, okay?"

"Okay!" Susie gave his nose two kisses for good measure, giggling when he scrunched it up.

Janet wasn't looking too happy, so Jack bowed to her with a flourish. "Love of my life!" he called cheerfully, waving at her as she blushed. "Come on, that bonfire's not gonna build itself!" It amused him no end that her fellow students were jealous of her, and he was willing to bet that she was going to be the most popular girl in school by the end of the week, with everyone wanting to know how it was like living with the Joker. Then Janet was at the door and Jack started to get out to let her sit by her sister.

"No!" Susie wailed. "I wanna sit by Jack!"

Jack frowned, at a loss for what to do, but Tom came to his rescue. "You sat by Jack all the way here, Susie. It's Janet's turn, and besides, you and Janet fit in the middle, and Jack doesn't. All right?"

"But I wanna sit by him . . ."

"If you don't stop whining, you're not going to be able to sit by him for a long time; you'll be grounded."

"That's right," Jack spoke up. "You had your turn, tootsie roll." Despite her best efforts, Susie giggled at the pet name. "So be good. Any trouble today?" he asked as he held the door for Janet.

"Uhm, not really . . ." She was still upset about the police and CPS coming to her house to talk with her mother, but Jack didn't care.

"Was it Cathy?"

"No, no one ---"

Jack got in and deliberately jostled her around as he buckled up, then turned a hard look on her. She went a little pale. "Rule number one in my home, Janet: _never_ lie to me. Is that clear?" She nodded, not looking at him. "Good. Now, who was causing trouble?"

"Just . . . a few people. Cathy and Marcus and a few others. The usuals."

"Have you reported any of this to the principal?" Tom asked as they left.

"Why? It's not going to stop."

"No one deserves to be harassed because of their home situation, Janet, and it's your principal's job to make sure all of her students feel safe at school. If it takes threatening to call the police and file a report, then Laurie needs to do that."

"It's not that bad," Janet replied testily. "I can ignore them."

"But it shouldn't be happening in the first place," Tom argued. "That's my whole point."

"Hate to take sides here," Jack said, "but he's got a point. Bullies will walk all over you until you stand up for yourself. Me, I just tend to leave them bleeding in an alleyway, but you've got better ways of dealing with them at your disposal. Don't take crap from anyone. What's your middle name?"

"What? Uhm, Lucyanne."

"Janet Lucyanne Mills. See? There's no 'doormat' in your name, so stop acting like one."

That made Susie giggle and repeat his last sentence, and Janet shrugged. "I'll tell Mrs. Bowen tomorrow."

"Good. It helps that her husband's Rachel's partner. I'll have her talk to him about it if she needs to." Jack grinned at the excellent connections he had.

"Can I hold Rory when we get home?"

Jack frowned at Susie. "Uhm . . . when we get to _my_ home, you mean?"

"Yeah! Home!"

"It's not _your_ home, cupcake," he reminded her gently.

Her lower lip pushed out. "But I want it to be."

Jack looked at Tom for help, but the other man was out of ideas and shrugged. "Ah . . . well, right now it's just my home. Mine and Rachel's. But you can hold Rory if you can find him, and if he lets you. And you can even see if he'll sleep with you tonight. How about that?"

It was hard, he reflected, negotiating with children. They were definitely shrewd, if somewhat gullible, negotiators. He watched Susie weigh her options, chewing her bottom lip in a gesture he recognised as his own, and then her forehead smoothed out as she nodded.

"Okay. But I want to roast my marshmallows all by myself."

"Fine, fine, you can do that," he assured her, really wanting a nap so he could get some energy back. Between Veronica and Susie, he was just about drained. Women. Energy saps, all of them.

***

Jack was doing the dishes when the house line rang. Susie and Janet were already in bed, and Rory had curled up with Susie after a few treats. It rang again as he was wiping his hands off. It might be a client of Rachel's, he mused. The house line was her work number. But at this time of night, it might be an emergency. He stared at the phone for another two rings before picking up.

"Bowen and Dawes Law Associates." There was silence on the other end, and Jack's eyes narrowed as he waited. He could hear very faint breathing, then the line clicked off. "Asshole," he muttered. He'd just gone back to the sink when the phone rang again. He turned around and stared at it, then went back and picked it up. Again. "Bowen and Dawes Law Associates." The breathing was a little more obvious, and now Jack was getting irritated. "This is the wrong line to crank call," he said in a calm, emotionless tone. "Knock it off." Then he hung up. It rang again almost immediately, and he ignored it.

The phone didn't stop ringing until the answering machine picked up, and this time the breathing was heavier. Something about it also caught Jack's attention and he shut the tap off, almost pressing his ear against the phone base's speaker as he closed his eyes and concentrated. There was . . . something . . .

He drew back with a start as a sharp cry erupted from the other end of the line, but it cut off quickly. It hadn't been a pained cry, more like . . . almost a startled cry, or someone who had been very quietly masturbating unexpectedly orgasming. His eyes narrowed and Jack took the phone off the hook.

"Fuck you, pal," he whispered harshly, then chuckled to himself with a lopsided grin. Someone wanted to get cute, did they? He made a quick round about the house, double-checking every door and window to make sure they were locked and the curtains were tightly closed, checking on the girls first and last before stretching out on the couch with his head resting on his hands. He wasn't afraid at all; Jack rarely felt that emotion, and it never paralysed him. That didn't mean, however, that he wasn't going to be cautious. He closed his eyes to get a little bit of sleep.

"_I believe in miracles . . . Where're you from, you sexy thing . . . I believe in miracles . . . Since you came along, you sexy thing . . ._"

He jerked awake immediately and flipped his phone open. "Yeah."

"Did I wake you up?"

Jack grinned at Rachel's voice and stretched. "Baby, I'd never sleep again, if you wanted me to."

"That's not an answer."

"Wasn't supposed to be. How was day two? Sunburned yet?"

"Not much opportunity for tanning in San Francisco, Jack, but the conference is amazing. A whole bunch of legal crap you don't care about, but I'm having a great time." He was quiet for a moment. "I wish you were here."

"That's what I was waiting for," he said with pleasure. "You miss me lots, huh?"

"I miss your penis, mostly," Rachel replied airily, which made him guffaw. "Your ego I can do without."

"It's okay for me to desperately miss you, but not for you to miss me one bit?" He was grinning. It was one in the morning; Janet and Susie were fast asleep. "Why don't you give yourself a nice hard swat for that."

"I'm sorry," she immediately said. "I won't do it again."

"That's nice," Jack replied. "You still need a swat. With a brush."

"Jack!"

He was absently running his hands over his chest and stomach, still grinning. "You're really uppity lately, you know that?"

There was the sound of her brush hitting her backside quite firmly, then her somewhat breathless voice. "There. Is that good?"

He almost laughed. "For now. Now, tell me how much you miss my penis. Personally, I miss _all_ of _you_, but we appear to be having double standards there at the moment."

"You dummy, of course I miss all of you. But to answer my question, what I miss most about your penis is that . . ."

Half an hour later, on opposite sides of the continent, two very sated lovers said their final good nights and flipped their phones shut, getting up just long enough to wash off a bit before snuggling under their covers with contented smiles.

Outside of the beach house, the night was absolutely silent but for the constant roar of the ocean.

*******

**A/N:** I am _so_ sorry this took so long to get out. Sing and I have been having issues of late. Major issues. I've also started a new job that's way more time-consuming than my last job, so I'm adjusting there. Anyway, I haven't forgotten you and I love you all! *smooches*


	7. Chapter 7

He was in a white tank top and jeans tailored so well he didn't need a belt to hold them up, the bottoms flaring a little and half-covering his work boots. Susie had painted on them, but he didn't really care. All Jack cared about at the moment was the stares he was getting as he arched his back in a satisfying stretch, then took his hair out of its ponytail and ran his fingers through it. Then he yawned and flopped into one of the chairs outside of the deli, stretching his long legs out and crossing his arms behind his head as he smiled to himself and basked in the late afternoon sunlight. Admiration was indeed good, and he closed his eyes to better listen for anything the women at the next table were saying about him as he waited for the girl inside to bring him his sandwich.

A car pulled up to the curb and then the faint smell of alcohol made him open his eyes. Mary Mills was walking into the liquor store, and he pursed his lips. He didn't mind Janet and Susie staying over once in a while, but his limit right now was two nights in a row. He wasn't about to let them invade his privacy for a third night, so Jack got up and followed her, covering her hand just as she grabbed a bottle of whiskey.

"Hey, Mary," he said in a low voice. She jumped and turned her head. "How are you?"

The woman blinked at him, then looked away and tried to tug her hand and the bottle out of his grasp. "I'm fine. Just gotta get something."

Jack smiled slowly, standing close and watching her throat work as she swallowed. "Nope, don't think so. I think you need to go home to your kids, Mary."

"Yeah, well, what do you know?" she snapped. "Go kill someone; it's what you're good at."

"I'm very good at it," he agreed, leaning down to murmur it in her ear and listening with pleasure as her breath hitched and she gulped again. Her hand on the bottle was shaking, and it wasn't from anger or withdrawal. Good. "Come on, Mary. I'll take you home and make you some dinner." She looked at him again and he smiled, the smile that almost always made Rachel's knees quiver. It worked on all women, or at least it worked on Mary, because the disgruntled look on her face was replaced by one filled with pure need and want and sex, and she let the bottle go with a return smile of her own.

"Well . . . I can always come back for more."

"Yeah, you can," Jack murmured, turning her around with a hand to the small of her back and leading her out of the store. He paused to grab his sandwich, left on the table by the deli girl, then loaded Mary into her car. "We'll get you home safe," he said for the benefit of the table full of gossipers. He got in the driver's seat and started the car, taking just a moment to make sure he remembered how to drive correctly, and pulled slowly out of the parking space. Yeah, he still knew how. Needed to talk with Rachel about being allowed to drive again.

"Thank you for taking the girls," Mary mumbled.

He glanced at her. "Sure. Stop drinking so you can take care of them yourself."

"I don't . . . I just . . . I just miss Harry too much sometimes," she defended herself. "Nothing helps. It won't stop hurting, Jack, and Susie looks so much like him . . . don't you ever need to just forget?"

"I don't remember shit about my past," he said dryly. "But I suppose I know what you mean. Janet and Susie don't have to suffer for it, though." She started crying quietly and Jack cursed under his breath. The things he did for his own comfort . . . "Look, Mary, you've got food at home, right?" She nodded, still snivelling. "All right, I'm a great cook. What do you want for dinner?"

Thoughts of food distracted her enough that she stopped crying, and once they'd gotten to her house and inside, Jack rummaged through the kitchen to find something to make. There wasn't a lot, but he could make do.

"Where are the girls?"

"At friends' houses. I needed to be alone."

Ah, she was foisting them on other people so she could drink in peace and quiet. That explained it. Jack nodded as he started water boiling for spaghetti.

"Why don't you have a seat while I cook," he said as she started to sneak off. The guilty look on her face said she'd been headed to the liquor cabinet. Mary sat obediently, and Jack looked her over for a moment before turning back to the freezer and pulling out some meat. She had Janet's brown hair and brown eyes, and if it weren't for the haggard look on her face, she'd be passingly pretty.

"Didn't your first wife die?"

He didn't even twitch. "Yeah. Fell off the balcony . . . almost five years ago."

He heard her sniff. "How did you cope with it?"

"Rachel was in my life from the start," Jack explained. "I mean, she was the D.A. in Gotham City when Harleen died, and she came down to the police station to question me about her death. I guess she forgot to go back to her own life, because I couldn't get rid of her." He smiled at the memory. Maybe he'd make her a big burrito when she got back, see if she remembered.

Mary's voice spiralled up into a whine as she spoke. "At least there was someone _there_ for you, you know? I mean, Janet was only thirteen and Susie was three . . . you didn't have two kids to take care of, you didn't have to worry about your mortgage or your car ---"

"I had to worry about an entire city being out for my blood, and being accused of murder," Jack interrupted as he sat across from her. "Not to mention I didn't know how to deal with any of it --- not people, not the situation, nothing."

"But you _had_ someone," Mary pressed. "You had an adult to talk to. Oh, forget it . . ." She crossed her arms in front of her and buried her face in them, sobbing.

Jack got up and hugged her because he recognised her loneliness, her need for someone to be there with her. Maybe this was what compassion felt like. He worried at the scars inside his mouth with his tongue as she clung to him, nails digging into his back. She was moaning about how much she missed her husband, how she couldn't stand seeing him when she looked at Susie, how terrible of a mother she was being and how much she tried to love her girls, and all Jack could think to do was hold her tightly and stroke her hair. Her outburst disgusted him but he _understood_, he knew what she was going through and for the sake of Janet and Susie, for the sake of not having to come out here again to get the girls, Jack took Mary's face in his hands and pressed a kiss to either cheek, then regarded her seriously.

"Look, Mary, I know how hard it is to lose someone you love." She sniffled, and he wiped her tears away gently. "I had a cat to take care of when Harleen died, and not much else. You've got two daughters who need you to be their mother. They can't do that when you're drinking yourself to death. I know you miss your husband, Mary, but Janet and Susie need you. They're too young to go through this, understand?"

She buried her face in his chest and cried harder. "I'm sorry . . . I'm so sorry . . ."

"Well, stop being sorry and start being a mother." Jack tried to stand up but Mary didn't let go, clutching at him tighter. He sighed and walked them both back to the stove. "Can I finish dinner?"

She nodded and loosened her grip, but still leaned close and Jack had to finished the noodles one-handed, his other hand around her shoulders. He listened to her talk about her dead husband because Rachel had listened to him talk about Harleen, even when he knew she hadn't wanted to. He realised, as he stirred the sauce, that he'd forgotten to fill Rachel's birth control. Oh, well. He'd do it tomorrow; as long as it was filled by the time she got back on Sunday, it would be all right.

"So," he said as he handed Mary a plateful of spaghetti, "are you going to stop drinking?"

"I won't drink as much," she replied.

"That's good." She looked surprised, like she'd expected him to insist she stop completely. Jack smiled slightly at her. "What? So long as it doesn't interfere with the kids, drink all you want. I don't care, so long as I don't have to do your job for you."

She poked at the food. "It's hard when everyone in town's talking about you . . . I can't even go shopping without them thinking I'm buying alcohol."

"That's because you usually are. If you don't want to be stereotyped, stop being stereotypical. Just a thought."

"Do you get lonely with Rachel gone?"

He paused, licking his lips as he stared at his plate. ". . . Yeah."

". . . Will you come by tomorrow? The girls would love to see you."

Jack closed his eyes briefly and took a deep breath. ". . . Sure." He looked at the time; he had at least an hour's walk ahead of him. He really wished she'd stop paralleling what he'd gone through so he could ignore her more effectively.

Jack managed to make small talk for another half hour, until it was obvious that Mary was just stalling to keep him there. Then he sighed and took her by the elbow, leading her firmly upstairs and to her bedroom. He waited outside the door while she got inter her pyjamas, and raised his eyebrows when she opened the door and just stood there in a short nightgown.

"All right, then. Need me to check under the bed for monsters?"

"Are you walking home?"

"Huh? Yeah, I am, and I need to get going."

The woman bit her lower lip and looked down, a gesture Janet used a lot. "I'm sorry, Jack. Why don't you stay here tonight? There's plenty of spare rooms."

He opened his mouth to protest but licked his lips instead, then nodded. "Sure, thanks." At least he didn't have to walk home, and she could give him a ride back in the morning. Mary smiled up at him as she slipped past, opening the bedroom between hers and Janet's.

"It's a little musty, I'm sorry," she said as she opened the curtains and the window. "Just let it air out a bit."

"I don't mind," Jack said as he sat on the bed. Mary came up to him and he tilted his head back to look at her. She was shaking again, on the verge of tears and put her hands on his shoulders, leaning down to press their lips together before Jack realised what she was doing. His brain registered the kiss first, then the softness of her lips, then her deep breaths and the pressure of her hands on his shoulder, and then the fact that this wasn't Rachel and he pushed her away.

"Okay, look," he said as she stumbled back and tried to apologise, "I really do get that you're lonely, and that you want someone to be with you and listen and comfort you and all, but I'm married." He held his left hand up, wiggling his ring finger to emphasise the band on it. "Happily married, to an amazing woman, and I'm quite in love. So I'm not doing this. You need a shoulder to cry on, sure, I can handle that, but that's the _only_ part of me you're getting. Is that clear?" Jack glared at Mary, heart racing from surprise. He'd been expecting Veronica to try to jump him, not Susie's mother.

Mary was nodding, her face held in her hands. "I'm so sorry, Jack, I just . . . I'm sorry." She turned and left the room, and Jack got up to close the door. He listened for a moment; he could hear her sobbing from her own room, and it made him roll his eyes. He'd thought that only Rachel could make him feel like an ass. Apparently he'd been wrong.

Jack knocked on her door gently, then opened it. "Hey, Mary? I'm sorry I snapped at you." She was laying curled up on her side, clutching her husband's pillow to her chest and ignoring him. He came and sat on the edge of the bed. "I was just surprised, is all. I know you need some comfort, but I'm not the guy for it, all right? Hey . . ." He touched her shoulder, then sighed and stretched out beside her, running his hand up and down her arm.

"You think I'm a whore."

"No, I think that _Veronica_ is a whore. I think that _you're_ lonely and need to keep your lips and hands to yourself and stop drinking so much so I don't have to take care of your kids. There's a big difference." He was speaking in a low voice, lips right behind her ear and she sighed as she slowly relaxed. She snuggled back against him and he straightened his arm out, letting her rest her head on it. "Now, go to sleep, all right?"

He wrapped his other arm around her waist, fully intent on leaving as soon as she was asleep, but it was sunlight in his face that woke Jack up. He shifted a little and held the warm body next to his close, and it snuggled closer, turning in his arms and lips met his neck. He sighed and arched his head back, hands pulling her closer before lowering his lips to hers. Something was a little off, but he was still mostly asleep so his libido took over, running his hands up her back and sighing into their kiss, ignoring the odd taste.

Then his brain caught up with his dick and Jack's eyes flew open as he shoved Mary away again, but this time she was just as surprised. He sat up and she crawled off the other side of the bed.

"Shit, I'm _so_ sorry," she gasped out. "I wasn't . . . I didn't mean to . . ."

Jack ran his hands through his hair as he got up, flushed, licking his lips. "No, no, that was my fault. I'm sorry, Mary. I don't think too clearly when I wake up."

The two stood across from each other, embarrassed and aroused, and then Jack cleared his throat.

"Yeah, look, I'll just walk home, all right? I . . . it would just cause trouble, you know, and I don't . . ."

She was nodding quickly. "Oh, sure, I understand. It's no problem; I'm sorry, Jack."

"No, no, wasn't your fault. Uhm. Yeah. See you around." He turned and opened the door just as Janet was about to knock on it. Her brown eyes got huge and her mouth dropped. "Uh . . . hi," Jack said lamely.

"Jack? What are you _doing_ here?!"

He looked over his shoulder at Mary. "Uh . . . took your mom home . . . uhm . . . guest room," he muttered.

"This is _not_ a guest room," Janet said firmly, looking like she'd just gotten punched in the stomach. "You . . . Mom . . . but, Rachel ---"

"No! No, it's not like that," Jack said as he grabbed her arm and pushed his way out of the room. "Look, she just needed someone there, all right? I didn't mean to fall asleep."

"Didn't mean to? You had sex with my _mother_!" Janet yelled, furious now that some of the shock had worn off. She jerked out of his grasp and pushed him away from her. "Oh my God, how could you _do_ that, Jack? What's _wrong_ with you? Rachel's going to kill you, and I'm telling her as soon as she gets back!"

Jack grabbed her arm again and shook her as his own anger bubbled up. "I didn't have sex with her, damn it!" he yelled back. "Or did you _want_ to come home to her passed out drunk on the couch? I made her dinner, and then we fell asleep, all right? _Look _at me, little _girl_," he growled when Janet turned her face away. He tightened his grip and she looked back with a pained gasp. "Shut your fucking mouth, because you don't have any clue what you're talking about. I did _not_ have sex with your mother. I do not _want_ to have sex with your mother. And when I _say_ that," and he shook her again, "I'm _not_ lying. Do you understand me?"

There were tears in Janet's eyes as she nodded. "I'm sorry," she whimpered. "I'm sorry, Jack. You're hurting me . . ."

Jack nodded. "Damn right I am." He shook her once more for good measure, then shoved her away. "Don't you _ever_ accuse me of lying _again_." Then he stormed past her, stomped down the stairs and didn't even acknowledge Susie as she was coming out of the kitchen.

"Jack! Jack, why are you at my house? Jack? Wait up!"

He ignored her small voice, not willing to face the child in this mood, and either she gave up chasing him or Janet had taken her inside because her voice stopped following him and he broke into a jog, trying to run his anger out. It occurred to him that Rachel hadn't called before she went to bed last night, either, and as Jack came into the town proper he slowed down and dug his phone out of his pocket. It wasn't like her to not call. If she had, he'd have gone back to that guest room and wouldn't be in such a foul mood at the moment. He wondered if she was all right. Had something happened?

Five tense rings later her hushed voice picked up. "Jack, what is it? I'm in a lecture."

He leaned against the feed store and pushed his sweaty hair out of his face. "You didn't call last night."

Rachel sounded slightly irritated as she sighed. "I'm sorry, we had a late night. I forgot, Jack. Is that all? I need to get back inside."

He didn't know what to say. Rachel never just brushed him off like this. Jack swallowed sharply. "Fine, yeah, just wondering if you were dead or not. Guess you aren't; go have fun."

"I'll call you after it's over. I love you, Jack."

"Uh-huh. Bye." He hung up, glaring at the phone. Fine, be that way. He didn't want to talk to her, anyway. Might blurt out that he'd been tonguing Mary when he'd woken up, and then she'd _really_ be pissed. But it hadn't been his fault! He'd been half asleep and had assumed it was Rachel next to him; she was the only woman he'd woken up next to since Harleen had died. It had been an easy mistake to make.

Jack straightened up and started a leisurely stroll down the street, just like he hadn't come from another woman's house and bed, just like he was out for a walk. Maybe he'd get some candy at the candy store. He liked sweet things. Maybe he'd buy some for Susie, too, to make up for ignoring her.

Which brought him back to babies, and the need to refill Rachel's prescription. He'd do it later; he'd already passed the drug store.

Christ, did he really want a kid? Could he handle it? He nodded absently to the few people who actually said hello, deep in thought as he wandered toward home. He was all fine with a kid _in theory_, but to actually have one . . . if he had to take care of the Fine's girl-thing all the time, or pick Susie and Janet up daily, or hell, even deal with periodic teenage outbursts from the elder Mills child . . . it wouldn't be nearly as fun then, he figured.

But then, Rachel would be there, too. She'd been right that he kept thinking about children in terms of him and him alone, not taking into consideration that she'd be there to help, or even do most of the work. He could . . . he could stare at the thing all day, if he wanted to. It would move and squirm and maybe he'd take it to the beach to calm it down, sit it in a car seat or carrier or whatever as he fished off their dock. Yeah, bonding. And he'd think about grounding it or other disciplinary actions when it was old enough. The Mitzi-creature didn't make much noise; the girl-thing had been easy to care for when he'd had dinner with its parents.

But if these murders went like he figured they would, like he was planning for, then a kid would get in the way and probably get hurt. He knew he could put a bullet through a stranger, no problem, but his own kid? Even if it saved Rachel? He wasn't so sure on that one.

"_So never judge a book by it's cover . . . Or who you're going to love by your lover . . . Love put me wise to her love in disguise . . . She had the body of a Venus, Lord imagine my surprise ---_"

He flipped his phone open. "Hey, fag. Whatcha got for me?"

"Oh, nothing you're going to like," the other man replied cheerfully. "No clue where either of them are. Haven't been seen for the past . . . six months for her, eight for him. You okay?"

"I'm fine. Anything else?"

"Uh, yeah. Turns out there were a couple John Does about a year back, bums, slashed like your girls up there."

"They're _not_," Jack growled, "_my_ girls."

"Ooh, sorry, sorry. Didn't mean to imply anything. Anyway, looks like you were right. How's things with my wife?"

"She's _my_ wife," he bit out, "and other than her mother-fucking biological time-bomb of a clock, we're peachy-keen."

"Oh my God, _please_ tell me you're going to have a kid!"

"Hideki, I am going to _kill_ you. No, I'm going to bang your boyfriend first, _then_ show you the video of it, _then_ kill you."

The D.A. was laughing. "You can't win, Jack. Geez, you'd traumatise a kid."

"_Thank_ you." He kicked at a rock. "So? Anything else? Couple of practice rounds, then they skip town and head up here? Why's it taken them so long?"

"No clue, you sexy, aggressive man."

"Blow me."

"Gladly. Let me say goodbye to Raoul after work and I'll come right up."

"I'm looking forward to it." Jack sighed. "I don't know about a kid, Hideki. This shit aside, I can't be good father material."

"Well, we'll talk about it next weekend. I'm sure we can train you up good if you decide to have a kid. You'll have to name him after me, of course."

"I'm not naming my child after you."

"Sure you are. I've gotta run, but tell my wife I said hi, will you?"

"Faggot," Jack grumped as Hideki laughed and hung up. He sighed and watched as the house came into view, listening to the wildlife chirping and squawking all around. There was a basket on the porch, a care-package from Tom and Helna, and Rory was sunning himself on the railing. He took a lazy swipe at Jack when the man patted his head. "Asshole."

Once inside, Jack put the food away and looked into the two spare bedrooms, carefully considering how each of them would look as a nursery. They'd have to buy so much _stuff_. Small stuff. Cute stuff. Fluffy stuff. A new chair to sit in and rock the baby. Those gate things to keep the offspring from getting into rooms it didn't need to be in, or from falling down the stairs. A playpen, maybe. Jack sighed and sat at the computer in the living room, booting it up and then doing a search for this Mother Goose lady he'd heard about.


	8. Chapter 8

"'Bye, Jack! See you later!"

"Yeah, yeah, go away," he grumped, shooing the kids off. Janet laughed as she got behind the wheel, Mary watching carefully from the passenger side. "Be careful! Don't hit me when I'm crossing the street!"

"I drive just fine!" she yelled back, grinning.

"Yeah, whatever." Jack shoved his hands in his pockets and slouched as he kicked at the ground, then chewed at the corners of his mouth as he watched the trio drive somewhat shakily off.

"Heard you've been hanging out at the Mills' place the past few days. Mary's looking a lot better."

"Yeah, well, I told her I'd kill her if she didn't clean up."

Tom laughed. "Missing the pitter-patter of little feet around you already?"

"No," he snapped, "I'm not. I'm glad I don't have to babysit any more. Those brats were getting annoying."

"Yeah, Rachel was getting annoying too, wasn't she, when she didn't call you because she was at dinner with that lawyer idol of hers? I remember you said you didn't want to talk to her, anyway."

"I didn't. She calls me too much."

"Not because you begged her to, or anything."

Jack turned to the other man and glared at him. "You looking for a fight, pig?"

Tom raised his fists. "Let's go, convict. I'll kick your whiny emo ass."

"Only if we get to use live rounds," Jack returned, throwing some light punches that Tom easily blocked.

"Sure; the good guys always win in Cops and Robbers, anyway, didn't you know?" He ducked a punch and then caught Jack in the stomach, but Jack grabbed Tom's wrist and twisted his arm up and behind him.

"Only if I play by the rules. Which I don't."

Then Helna came rushing out of the beauty salon and thrust the baby at the two men. "Argh! Darn it! Here, take Mitzi, I've got something in my eye. Owowowowowow!" Tom slid out of the way, which forced Jack to take the girl-thing or drop it, and he made a face as it giggled at him.

"Ugh, this thing's ugly. Why are you so ugly?" he asked it. He didn't get an answer, just another toothless smile and gurgling laugh. He'd learned the previous day not to let the small hands close to his hair, because the girl-thing didn't let go once something was in its grip. "Ugly, ugly, ugly, and you don't even have the benefit of being a swan."

Helna turned around. "You know the story of the ugly duckling?"

Jack was concentrating on making severe faces at her progeny. "Yeah. Looked it up. Stupid story. Ugly, ugly, ugly," he chanted, bouncing the squirming life in his arms. "Such an ugly girl-thing."

"Did you just call my daughter a _girl-thing_?" Helna asked in disbelief.

Jack looked up. "Uh . . . yeah. It's a thing and it's female."

"And when do children become actual people to you, and not objects?"

He licked his lips and thought about it. "Uh . . . at chest level."

"Chest level?"

"Yeah. As soon as the tops of their heads hit my chest, they're people. Why?"

She turned away in disgust. "I can't believe we're encouraging this man to breed," she muttered to her husband.

Tom laughed as he took Mitzi from Jack. "He's a good guy, Helna. Just needs time to adjust."

"I don't need to adjust!" the good guy protested. "I don't want kids!"

"Then why haven't you filled Rachel's pills yet?" he was asked as they walked across to the deli.

"Crap, I forgot again! Rachel's gonna kill me. She can do it Monday. Hey, candy-cane, gimme the usual," he said to the girl at the counter. Tom grinned as Helna ordered for them, then Mitzi started fussing. Jack took her back. "Look, creature, you'll be swimming with the fishes if you don't shut it, all right?" She calmed down, tiny mouth puckering open in a yawn. "That's right, you go to sleep. Gotta get a lot of beauty sleep to make _you_ pretty, you ugly thing. Now, back to what I was telling you before. You can't trust the mob," he whispered, ignoring the police officer seated next to him, "but you _can_ buy off key players in it, and they don't need to be the big-shots. Middle-men will work, too, as long as you do it right."

Tom sighed. "Will you please stop telling my child how to be a mobster, Jack?"

"This city deserves a better class of criminal," Jack replied as he gestured with Mitzi, "and I'm gonna give it to them!" He got pursed lips and raised eyebrows, then went back to talking at the sleepy girl-thing. "All right, first thing we do is knock off your old man. I don't trust him. Then we buy off a few officers. How's that sound? Gather up two or three local thugs, then take out the bank. Is Wednesday at two good for you? It's good for me. Okay?"

"I don't know if I should arrest him or laugh," Tom murmured as Helna sat down with their food.

"If he shows up at two on Wednesday, I'm hitting him with a frying pan, then inviting him to lunch," she replied. Jack had moved on to plans for taking over a small country; he'd clearly put a lot of thought into it, too. "Okay, small countries I'm fine with. They can take over a country. Just not this city."

"We'll call it Jackestan, and the capitol city will be Mitziville, think that's fair? It _was_ going to be Rachelville, but she thinks some famous lawyer's more important than me, so she's not my main lady any more. We'll have purple M&M's for every dessert, and mandatory Karaoke Wednesdays, with prizes."

"Scratch that, just call the loony bin." Tom grinned at his wife. Jack was still obviously upset that Rachel had gone to dinner instead of calling him, and he'd rambled on earlier about the 'fat, balding lump of a lawyer' that Rachel 'looked at like he was Adonis or something.' Never mind that that fat, balding lump of a lawyer was one of the most successful prosecuting attorneys in the United States; Jack was jealous and sulking.

"You got the new window glass, right?" Jack asked after they were done eating. They'd dropped him off last night to find that someone had broken a few windows. Rory was still hiding under the house and growling whenever someone came near. The police had been over the place, but there were no fingerprints or anything, and Jack had just bitched about the money he now had to spend to fix the windows.

"It's in the truck; I'll cook dinner while you boys fix the windows."

"You're my second best lady, Helna," Jack said with a winning smile.

"Rachel's been booted to third, now?"

He shrugged. "She's off with her lawyer buddies, and besides, I have an acknowledged weakness for Jewesses." He wiggled his eyebrows at her and she laughed as she threw a balled-up napkin at him.

"Sorry, I'm taken."

"Well, I'll stick with Mitzi, then. I only have to wait, what, seventeen years and eight months?" The Fines rolled their eyes as Jack laughed at them.

***

Tom and Jack had just finished the second to last window when a black car crested the small hill. Glancing over his shoulder, Jack growled a little.

"What do they want _now_?" he muttered, wiping his hands off on a towel and grabbing a cold root beer. He leaned against the awning pillar and wiped the sweat from his forehead as he took a gulp. "Can't talk to you," he called when Detectives Grady and Daniels got out of the car, "wife's not here."

"We heard," Grady replied as he glanced at Tom. "Where is she?"

"California. She'll be back late tomorrow. Oh, Tom, this is Detective Grady and Detective Daniels from the Fair Oaks po-po. This is Lieutenant Fine, from the Loleta po-po."

"Are you always this disrespectful?" Daniels asked.

"I dunno; have I ever been respectful? Think hard, you might find a pattern."

Tom rolled his eyes as he shook hands with the men. "Detectives."

"Lieutenant. We just need a moment of Mr. Dawes' time."

"Ask away," Jack replied as he set the root beer down and turned to the last window.

"What happened?"

"Someone broke my windows. Wow, you're not on top of things today, are you?"

"Where were you last night, Mr. Dawes?"

Jack paused and sighed, rolling his eyes at Tom as they lifted the glass into place. "Visited the Mills, then had dinner with Lieutenant Fine and his wife and their Mitzi-thing, then they dropped me off here at about nine-thirty, when we promptly noticed the windows and called his po-po buddies down to investigate. Talked with my wife for a bit when she finally remembered to call me, looked up some porn on-line, ate a bag of chips, and watched a movie. Then Rachel called again at one to say goodnight, and after a _most_ satisfying hour of phone sex, I went to sleep around two. Got up a couple of times, and finally rolled out of bed at noon, then headed to class. And now I'm here." He pursed his lips. "But I might by lying about looking up porn. So. Who went missing and where did you find them?"

"Three girls disappeared between Sunday night and Monday morning," Daniels said as he leaned against the railing on the stairs and looked up at Jack. "All three of them were found last night, not too far from here. The FBI's probably going to take over the case soon. They were slashed, like the others, but this time there was a Bible torn up around and inside of them."

Jack grunted a little as he and Tom sealed the glass in. He turned a frown on the two men. "A Bible?"

"A Bible."

"Huh. Inside of them?"

Grady's lips pursed. "In every orifice a page could fit in. Are you a religious man, Mr. Dawes?"

"Oh, hell no. There's no way a kind and loving god of any sort would allow all the shit that happens in this world --- including _me_ --- to happen, and I don't care about that free will theory. If there _is_ some sort of supernatural entity floating about the cosmos, it sure as hell left _us_ in the dirt a long time ago." He downed the last of his root beer and reached for a new one. "So, raped to death by the Bible. Kinda funny. This a new thing?"

"Yes." Grady sighed and ran his hands through his hair before pulling out a packet of photos and handing them to Jack. "Are you sure you can't tell us anything about this guy's motives?"

Jack sat on the porch and flipped through the pictures of the bodies and the crime scene. His brown eyes lost their warmth and hardened as he pored over the tiniest of details. His tongue slid heavily across his lips and he was breathing through his mouth. He'd entertained brief suspicions that _he'd_ killed the first girls, but how he would get to Fair Oaks and back, and keep it from Rachel, was a mystery to him. So he'd dropped those thoughts, especially as time had progressed. He didn't like to discriminate in who he killed, anyway.

The smiles were the same, the method of death was the same. The Bible part confused him, but he knew that insanity worked in many ways. Still . . .

"Like I said, this guy's doing them way out in the middle of nowhere. Other than that, I can't help."

The detectives left soon after, and Tom sat down by Jack as they stared out at the ocean. "You know who's doing this, don't you?"

"Would that matter? The police would make a mess of it if I knew and told them, anyway. These women are just a way of getting me riled up. I don't know what he wants for sure, but I've got it handled."

"Handled?" Tom asked sharply. "What are you going to do, kill everyone you think might be doing this? More women are going to die if you don't tell them what you know, Jack."

Jack had grabbed the flash light out of his tool kit and the bottle of nail polish he'd hidden from Rachel that she'd never found, and he'd forgotten about. He started painting on the glass while he spoke. "I don't know anything for sure. I have people looking into it legally, but I'm not going to start a manhunt that might not go anywhere, when the Fair Oaks police and the FBI need to concentrate on searching locally. If I wanted to do things _ill_egally, I'd have to start from scratch; no one from my old life would talk to me at this point."

"So what are you going to do?"

"It's simple." Jack looked up and grinned, pointing the flash light at the wall and turning it on. "Call in the cavalry."

Tom turned to look at the wall and the stylised bat shadow that adorned it.

***

He looked around, then reached his hands out. "C'mere . . ."

The Mitzi-thing raised its arms obligingly, giggling as he lifted it out of its car seat. Its parents were using the restroom, leaving Jack with time to hold the pudgy thing without feeling like he was being judged in a competition. He was sitting in the airport's waiting area, half an hour early, and laid the girl-creature down on his legs, the tiny feet tucked against his stomach and fuzzy head resting on his knees as he leaned over it. Its little fists were wrapped around his pinkies and he waved its arms around, having discovered earlier that a trilling coo, not unlike the sound a dove produced, made the Mitzi-thing giggle. His loose hair --- past his shoulders, now --- tickled its puffy cheeks and caused more giggles, some of them even squeals of delight as he bounced his legs a bit.

"You're such an ugly, loud, obnoxious thing," he said between coos. "I bet they only keep you because you're so horrid-looking that they know no one else will want you. Isn't that right? Ah, I see you admit nothing. But you also _deny_ nothing. I have hunches, see, and I have a hunch . . ." He trailed off as high heels clicked on the ground, accompanied by the rolling of luggage, and stopped in front of him. Jack looked up with wide eyes to find Rachel standing over him, her lower lip trembling as she smiled, unshed tears in her own eyes.

"Uh . . . hi," he said.

"Hi," she replied. He was trying to come up with a good excuse as to why he was holding the Mitzi-thing, not only talking to it but _cooing_ at it, like he enjoyed holding it or something. Rachel just set her bags down and then sat next to him, laying her head on his shoulders as she reached out to gently stroke the Mitzi-thing's cheek. "I missed you."

"Missed you, too." He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and then rested his cheek on it with a sigh. "You're early."

"Half an hour late, actually. I managed to get on an earlier flight that was supposed to get me here an hour sooner, but it got delayed in Philadelphia for half an hour."

They were both watching the Mitzi-thing and not each other. "Oh. Good thing I was early."

"Yeah, good thing."

The clock was chiming eleven-thirty when Jack cleared his throat. "Look, Rachel, about kids ---"

"Jack, please." She shook her head and looked up at him, looking like she might start crying. "I did a lot of thinking this week, Jack. No, just listen to me." She cupped his cheek and smiled at him. "I sprung this whole thing about kids on you with no warning, and expected you just to accept it. I didn't really give you a choice about it; it was pretty much we have a baby or you sleep on the porch for the rest of your life. That was . . . wrong of me to do, Jack, and I'm so sorry." She was holding back tears bravely as Jack stared at her. "I didn't really stop to think that you might have some good reasons for not wanting a baby, like your past and these murders, and . . . and I just want you to know that you don't need to give me an answer right now." Now she looked away, hiding her face in his shoulder once again.

A week ago --- three days ago --- this would have made Jack whoop with joy. Now all he could think to say was, "Oh." And, "Thank you." Oh, there was also, "Someone threw rocks through a couple of windows. Me and Tom fixed them." Then he lifted the Mitzi-thing up and set it back in the car seat before turning to Rachel to give her a proper welcome. Her lips and mouth were exquisite, her touch was even more satisfying than he remembered. Jack held on to Rachel tightly. He pulled her into his lap and squeezed until her back popped and she whined a bit into their kiss, but she didn't pull away when he loosened his grip.

When Rachel _did _pull back, she pressed her forehead against his and ran her fingers through his hair. "Let's go home, sweety."

Tom and Helna had waited a polite distance away until Rachel and Jack stood up, then walked over to welcome her home.

"How was your trip? You must be tired from the flight."

Rachel smiled as she hugged Helna, then shook Tom's hand. "It's eight-thirty in California and I napped on the plane. I'm still wide awake."

"_Yes_! I'm getting laid when I get home!"

She laughed and turned to roll her eyes at Jack as he hugged her tightly from behind. "Yes, you are."

"Lots," he said firmly. "Lots and lots and lots."

She sighed and gave the other couple an apologetic look. They nodded and rolled their eyes in understanding. "I took tomorrow off, too, so I could start to get back to the right time zone. So yes, you can keep me up all night if you want to." He giggled and pinched her stomach gently, face buried in her hair. "Oh, Jack, did you fill my birth control?"

He faltered a little, a guilty look on his face. "Uh . . . no, I'm sorry. I completely forgot."

Rachel sighed as Tom gave Jack a significant glare and shook his head sharply. "It's all right; I don't need to take any this next week. I'll do it tomorrow."

"Okay. Sorry." Tom was still glaring at him so Jack slowed down, letting Rachel talk with Helna about how Mitzi was doing as they walked out to the car. "What?" he hissed.

"Tell her _no_," Tom hissed back.

"No what? No birth control? She said we don't have to have kids right now. I'm off the hook, man." He got a smack upside his head. "Ow! What the hell?"

"She _said_ that because she was feeling guilty about how she's been treating you! It doesn't mean she doesn't want kids!"

"Yeah, so?" Jack rubbed the back of his head and probed at his scars with his tongue. "We can wait, now, and I'll tell her if I want 'em or not when that killer's been caught."

Tom smacked him again. "You _do_ want them, Jack, and the search could go on for _years_. Just tell Rachel you don't want her to be on birth control any more; you don't have to _try_ to get pregnant, you can just let it happen if it happens."

"Uh, yeah, Tom? She'd be knocked up in a week if I did _that_. Besides, I don't know where you get the impression that I want kids."

"Oh, for the love of --- you're a damned expert in fairy-tales these days, Jack! You grab a hold of Mitzi every chance you get, and you've been sulking ever since Mary started taking better care of her girls, so they haven't been spending as much time with _you_! Not to mention riding to their rescue every chance you get and showing off about it! You're in serious denial about wanting kids, pal."

"Oh, fuck you," Jack responded. He didn't really have a better response, and didn't let himself ponder what that implied. He slid into the car and crossed his arms over his chest as he scowled. "Let's go so I can have sex."

"Just wait until you're home," Helna said as she put the Mitzi-thing's carrier in and secured it.

He lay his head back against the seat and closed his eyes. "Right. I don't want to put the Mitzi-thing to sleep again."

"The Mitzi-thing?"

The other woman sighed as Tom pulled out of the parking spot. "Jack's theory is that people are things until they're at chest level to him."

"What?" Jack asked as Rachel turned raised eyebrows to him. She just laughed and smiled, taking his hand across Mitzi's car seat.

***

For once, it was Jack who was losing the quiet game. He was also the one tied down to the bed, too, and was loving every minute of it. His little Rachel could be quite aggressive when she wanted to be, and he arched his back in pleasure as she raked her nails down his chest, leaning down to bite his nipple. That made him groan and buck his hips up; Rachel responded with a sharp pinch to his other nipple, then her teeth were sinking into his neck and he cried out again, whispering dirty things to her that earned him a slap across the face and a yank on his hair.

"Hold _still_, damn it," Rachel hissed as she sat up again and slapped his hip. Jack laughed at her and obeyed, his whole body shaking with the effort it took to keep from thrusting up into her. She lowered her head and rested her hands --- still in the cuffs he'd managed to get on her before her surprise attack had overwhelmed him --- on his chest as her hips moved over his. Her nails dug in and broke skin and Jack whined, his arms straining against the ropes that held them to either side of the bed.

While normally given to many delicious, varied vocal expressions of pleasure, this time Rachel only whined a little each time she sank back down onto him. She kept rocking against him, those fast-paced whimpers picking up speed and volume, and Jack loved them. He forgot all about keeping quiet and holding still and almost threw Rachel off of him, but she grabbed his face and kissed him roughly, tongue demanding entrance into his mouth and he willingly gave in. The chain of the handcuffs on her wrists was cutting off his air supply just enough to produce a wonderful sensation, and as Jack lost control so did Rachel, tossing her head back with a throaty yell that he echoed, and then she collapsed on top of him as her whole body trembled and twitched once in a while.

"Oh, _shit_," he whispered hoarsely before coughing. "We need to fuck like this more often." Rachel laughed into his neck and rested for a minute or so before rolling off of him and snuggling close. "Hey, hey, let me go already," Jack murmured.

"Mm-mm," she mumbled with a shake of her head, sitting up enough to pull the covers over them.

"What? What do you mean, 'mm-mm'? C'mon, Rachel, untie me."

She laughed softly and closed her eyes as she settled back down against him. "No. You leave me tied up overnight all the time."

She really wasn't going to untie him. Jack cursed a bit, but all that earned him was two fingers against his mouth and a quiet command to shut up.

"You are _so_ going to pay for this," he told her as she yawned.

Rachel just leaned up to kiss him. "Go to sleep, Jack. I love you."

He nipped at her lip, then mumbled something in return and watched Rachel fall into dreams.


	9. Chapter 9

_I need to ask you a favour. You know about what's happening here. I'm trying to fix it, but I'm not sure I can be here much longer. I might have to go away and if that happens, I'll need your help in bringing me back._

_You were right about him all along, see. He never changes. Maybe it sounds like an excuse to say that what happened four years ago was his fault, not mine, but there you have it. I liked being here so I grabbed on to the first thing that would keep me focused. But if he comes back, and I have to leave, he'll be out for blood and I'll need you here to make sure it's the right blood. He's not happy that I've been hanging around for so long; he might not let me come back. I'll try my best, but if I don't make it, I need you here to pick up the pieces._

_You should be getting everything I've had gathered for me with this letter, so you know as much as I do. Take care of her for me._

_***_

"Love of my life!" Hideki jumped out of the car and ran up to Rachel, swinging her around in a bear hug as they both laughed. "I've missed you so much! Too good to come visit your husband, huh?" He gave her a big kiss on the mouth and Rachel squealed when he slipped his tongue against her lips.

She jerked back and smacked the side of his head. "Ew! Hideki! No tongue!"

"Tongue?" Jack asked as he got a hug, too. "Are you trying to slip Rachel some tongue, Hideki?"

The younger man laughed as Raoul got out of the car. "Yeah, I'm sorry."

"You should be. Rachel only gets tongue if I get tongue, too." Jack grinned down at Hideki, who turned to his boyfriend as he was hugging Rachel.

"Can I French Jack?" he asked.

"Yeah, can he?" Jack seconded with a lopsided, teasing grin as he put his arm around Hideki's waist.

Raoul rolled his eyes as Rachel shook her head. "Have fun," he said.

"Don't give him cooties," Rachel told him as she leaned down to pick up an overnight bag, fully expecting laughter before the two came to help.

What she got was Hideki turning back to Jack and pulling him down to plant a serious kiss on his lips, a kiss that Jack returned as her jaw dropped. Hideki held Jack's face between his palms and Jack wrapped his strong arms around Hideki's waist, angling his head a little more as they moved closer, bodies flush against each other. Both men were obviously enjoying themselves and Rachel had to swallow past a suddenly dry throat as she and Raoul watched.

"Is it weird that this is kind of turning me on?" she asked him in a low voice. 'Kind of' was a little bit of an understatement. She should be horribly jealous, seeing red, to the point of murder with rage that Jack was so enthusiastic about what should have been a joking peck on the lips at the most --- which meant that he'd wanted to kiss Hideki to begin with --- but she wasn't.

"It's sort of a weird situation," Raoul replied distractedly, "but no, that's not a weird reaction."

"But he's my _husband_. And he's kissing someone _else_."

"Yeah, my boyfriend."

They'd both meant to stop the kiss, but each lapsed back into silence as Jack's hands wandered down to Hideki's rear and cupped it, pulling him even closer. He broke the kiss, panting, and then whispered something in Hideki's ear that made the younger man laugh.

Jack looked at Rachel and Raoul and grinned. "Yeah, uh, I need to borrow Hideki for a bit . . ." He took the man's hand and tried to walk away, but Rachel snorted.

"I don't _think_ so. Get your ass back here, Jack."

"Yeah?" Hideki murmured as they obediently stood before their lovers.

"Maybe," Jack replied. Louder, "But you don't give blow-jobs, Rachel, and Hideki does."

"_My_ dick's the only one he puts his mouth on," Raoul said with narrowed eyes, but he was trying not to smile.

"And you don't stick _your_ dick in anyone but _me_," Rachel seconded as she reached up to grab his ear.

"Ow!" Jack laughed and kissed her; she could taste Hideki's mouthwash. "Well, then, come on." He took her hand and tugged her toward the house, but Rachel resisted.

"And just where are we going?"

"We're all going to bed!" he declared as Hideki burst into laughter.

Rachel stared at her husband, not sure if he was serious or joking. "What, all four of us?" His grin got wider. "Jack, you are _not_ inviting other people into our bed!" Hideki came up behind her and rested his chin on her shoulder, arms around her waist. Rachel was ready to scream. "Raoul, make them stop!"

He pushed them off of her as he laughed. "All right, all right, break it up. No foursomes, you two."

"Why not?" Hideki whined. "Party-pooper."

"You're no fun," Jack agreed as he picked up two bags. "It's not like it'd be my first, y'know . . ." He and Hideki headed inside as Rachel stared after them.

"They're serious, aren't they?" she asked Raoul.

He scratched the back of his neck and arched his eyebrows. "Uh . . . I think they might be."

"Oh, no! No no no!" Rachel grabbed another bag and hurried after Jack. "Jack Dawes! I am _not_ having sex with three men at once! Two of them don't even _like_ women!"

"More for me, then!"

She barged through the door and threw the bag at him. "_You're_ not sleeping with them, either!"

He'd caught the bag and held it in front of him like a shield as Rachel smacked at him. "Hey, hey! Calm down! It was just a thought! Man, you let me tie you up and whip you, but the moment I suggest someone _else _play with us, you freak out! I'm sorry! Ow! I'm sorry!"

She'd beat him down into a crouch, tears of laughter streaming from his eyes even as he begged for forgiveness. One more good clock upside the head and Rachel was finished, panting as she glared down at her breathless husband.

"You just watch yourself this weekend, mister." Then a wave of nausea hit her and Rachel covered her mouth with one hand, the other grabbing at the back of the couch as dizziness followed. "Oh . . ."

"Are you all right?" Jack asked from the floor. He was still hiding behind the bag and peeked around it with a frown.

"Yeah, I'm just . . . I need some water."

He got up and took Rachel's hand, bringing her around to sit on the couch. "Okay, I'll get some."

"I think I caught the flu in California," she told Hideki and Raoul as Jack went into the kitchen. "Jack's been taking care of me."

"It's sunny in California!"

"Not in San Francisco, not this time of year." Rachel smiled up at Jack as she took the glass of water he handed her and sipped at it. She was suddenly exhausted. "Guys, you'll be in the room down here ---"

"Actually, I sort of promised the girls that they could stay over tomorrow night," Jack said as he shoved his hands in his pockets and examined his feet. "They stay down here when they sleep over."

"Two of the girls in Jack's dance class stay over sometimes," Rachel explained. "But I'm not sure I want you sleeping so close to Hideki, Jack." She glared at him but it held no heat, then smiled when he kissed her forehead.

"I promise to only have sex with him if you and Raoul both say I can."

"Your consideration of my feelings never fails to amaze me, dear."

"I'm a considerate guy." He wrinkled his nose when she kissed it. "I'll get them settled; you stay here."

"I'm fine now," Rachel protested, but Jack pushed her gently back onto the couch when she tried to stand. "Jack, I feel fine."

"If you might be getting sick, I don't want you making it worse. I'll bring you some medicine. C'mon, you two."

"She does look a little pale," Raoul commented as they headed up the narrow stairs. "Nice place."

"Yeah, I fix things in exchange for sex." Jack grinned. "Doesn't mean I always get it." He opened the bedroom door opposite his. "This big enough?"

"Yeah, it's great." Jack ducked into the bathroom at the head of the stairs, grabbing some cold medicine from the cabinet. "What's this door for?" Hideki called. "And why's it dead-bolted?"

"I asked that when we first moved in," Jack replied as he came back in to the room. "It's like a crawlspace/attic thing, and it goes between the two rooms up here. Our door to it is dead-bolted, too. I'd just read _It_ and she was trying to scare me," and here he scoffed a little, "so when I asked why her mom was trying to keep us out of the space, she asked what if the dead-bolts weren't to keep people _out_, but to keep something else _in_?" Jack laughed. "Yeah, we slept downstairs for about a week after that."

Hideki had edged behind Raoul, and glanced at the small door nervously. "So . . . you don't know why it's locked?"

"Open it and find out," Jack told him with an evil grin.

"You're an ass."

"Yes, I know." He walked out of the room and down the small hallway to look out the window, staring down the driveway. "The Fines are here. Looks like they brought the Mitzi-thing."

"What's a Mitzi-thing?" Raoul asked as he and Hideki joined Jack.

He pointed to the car seat Helna was holding. "That. That's a Mitzi-thing. It's their progeny-creature. I'm training it to be a criminal mastermind."

The other two laughed. "Like some pet, huh?" Hideki asked.

"Yeah. C'mon, I'll introduce you. Don't worry, I didn't tell them you're gay." They got downstairs just as Tom knocked on the door and peered in at them. "Hey, Tom. Come on in. Rachel, take this and stay there." She gagged over the thick syrup he made her drink as Tom held the door for Helna. Jack took the Mitzi-thing out of the carrier and grinned at it. "Hey there, ugly. Here's some politicians and cops to buy off." He took it over to Hideki and Raoul. "This is Hideki; he's the District Attorney for Gotham City. And this is Raoul; he's a police officer at the Major Crimes Unit in Gotham. Buy them off and you'll be okay for a while."

Rachel sighed from the couch as she turned around. "Tom, Helna, these are our friends, Hideki and Raoul."

"Glad to meet you," Tom said as he shook hands with the two. "I'm Tom Fine, and this is my wife, Helna. You've been introduced to our daughter."

"I can't believe two good-looking people like you produced such an ugly abomination," Jack said cheerfully as he walked past, Mitzi curled up in the crook of his arm.

"Glad to meet you," Raoul said as they all sat down.

"He's like an oversized kid," Hideki said as Jack disappeared into the kitchen. "By the way," and he flicked a glance at the Fines, "two people we know are exchanging vows soon. You're invited."

Rachel's face lit up. "That's wonderful! Tell them congratulations. I wish I could tell you that someone's having a baby, but . . ." She shrugged and pursed her lips.

Helna reached over and squeezed her knee as Tom laughed. "Give it a month or so, Rachel, and you might just find your birth control's missing."

"Are you mad at me for forgetting to get that filled?" Jack asked as he came back in, Mitzi over his shoulder and two trays of finger-food in his hands. "I said I was sorry; you didn't need it last week, anyway." He handed the trays to Tom, who had stood to take his daughter back. The man just raised his eyebrows as he set the trays on the coffee table. Jack settled next to Rachel and transferred Mitzi to his lap. "Rachel's not feeling well today; I don't know if we should go out."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "Jack, I'm _fine_. I'll go to Dr. Howard tomorrow, all right?"

He kissed her cheek. "Thank you."

"This place we're going to for dinner has karaoke, right?" Hideki asked during a lull in the conversation a while later.

Raoul shook his head with a sigh as Helna nodded. "Every night. It's the only karaoke place in town. Rachel said you loved karaoke."

Hideki grinned at her. "Yep; used to do it every summer when we visited my mother's family in Japan. What are we doing about the baby?"

"Oh, Janet's watching her tonight."

"Is that the one with a huge crush on you?" Raoul asked Jack.

"No, her little sister's the one who wants to marry me." He still hadn't realised that Janet was in love with him. "But you'll meet them tomorrow." He'd reluctantly handed Mitzi back to Tom, complaining all the while about how terrible she smelled. "So, you two are coming with us, and Tom, you and Helna are dropping that awful creature off with Janet and meeting us there?"

"That's the plan," Tom replied as Hideki and Raoul cleared the now-empty trays. "Reservation's under Dawes?"

"Yeah." He looked over his shoulder at Rachel, who was nodding off. "We might need to cut out early, though."

Tom nodded. "It's not a problem. See you there."

"Yep." Jack turned back to Rachel and reached down to touch her shoulder. She jerked a little and looked up. "Are you okay? We don't have to go out if you're not feeling well . . ."

"No, I'll be fine." She yawned. "Just don't swing me around too much."

"I'll try not to. Come on, let's get you ready for dinner."

Half an hour later the six of them were sitting in Sundance Bar & Grill, hollering encouragement at the singer on the stage as she belted "I Will Survive." Hideki had commandeered one of the songbooks and had already put at least three songs in, in addition to the one he'd sung as they'd waited for their meals to arrive.

While initially starving, Rachel's stomach had heaved a little when her food had been set in front of her, and she'd been mostly pushing it around her plate and hoping Jack wasn't noticing that she wasn't really eating. He was howling with laughter, and then the singer bowed and scurried back to her table.

"All right, give Mandy a big hand!" the K.J. said, pushing a few buttons. "We've got a new singer coming up, folks, let's give a big hand to Jack!"

"What the hell?" Jack asked, looking around to see if anyone was headed up to the stage. Hideki burst into laughter and Jack glared. "I am _not_ going up there."

"Come on up, Jack! Don't be afraid, we don't bite," the K.J. called. "Going once . . ."

"Oh, go on," Rachel urged. "Sing me something good."

Jack stared at them as they pushed and prodded, then got up with a roll of his eyes and tromped to the stage. "What am I singing, Godie? I didn't put a song in." The title appeared on the screen and he raised his eyebrows, raising the microphone to his mouth. "I'm going to hurt you, Hideki," he said during the introduction.

"Sing it, baby!" the man called out, still laughing.

Rachel's eyes widened and she turned to Helna. "Is this . . . ?"

"I think so," Helna said with a nod.

Jack cleared his throat and shook his head as he started singing. He didn't need to watch the lyrics light up; he knew the song by heart. "You're just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off you . . . You'd be like Heaven to touch, I wanna hold you so much . . . At long last love has arrived, and I thank God I'm alive . . . You're just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off you . . ."

Rachel was squealing with wide-eyed, shocked laughter; apparently she hadn't realised his musical interests lay in other genres than death metal and rock. Jack licked his lips and stepped off the stage as he continued, making his way over to their table.

"Pardon the way that I stare, there's nothing else to compare . . . The sight of you leaves me weak, there are no words left to speak . . . But if you feel like I feel, please let me know that it's real . . . You're just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off you . . ."

Rachel was red with laughter by the time Jack knelt on both knees in front of her, raising his hand to her. "I love you, baby," he sang as he took her hand and pulled her up despite her protests, "and if it's quite all right, I need you, baby, to warm the lonely night." He held her against him as they swayed on the dance floor, and a few other people got up to dance, as well. Jack grinned at Rachel. "I love you, baby. Trust in me when I say: Oh, pretty baby, don't bring me down, I pray." He spun her around gently, then pulled her back against him again as she laughed, singing along. "Oh, pretty baby, now that I found you, stay, and let me love you, baby. Let me love you . . ."

Jack dipped her gently at the end of the song to raucous applause, and she tweaked his nose. Godie came down to take the mic from him, encouraging more applause as Jack helped Rachel back to her seat.

"Was that too rough?" he asked as she reached for her water.

"I'm a little dizzy, but I'll survive. I didn't know you knew that song!"

Jack laughed and rubbed at his scars a little before scratching the back of his head. "Yeah, well, I know a lot of songs."

"Hey, _I_ didn't even know you knew how to sing!" was Tom's exclamation as he clapped Jack on the back. "That was amazing, man."

"You were great," Helna agreed.

Rachel leaned back in her seat a little and waved her hands in front of her. "Whoa, ego! Down! Now!" Jack just rolled his eyes at her as he took their compliments a little smugly.

"That wasn't romantic enough for you?" he asked teasingly.

Rachel shot him a sharp look, then rubbed her eyes gently. "Oh, no, it was romantic. Thank you." She leaned over and kissed his lips gently. "You're incredibly romantic when it benefits your ego."

"And it almost always does," he replied with a quick kiss of his own. "That's why I send you flowers at work."

Rachel smiled widely, then yawned. "Oh, oh . . . I'm so sorry," she mumbled through it, covering her mouth.

Jack rubbed the small of her back gently. "Can you two bring Raoul and Hideki back when he's done making a fool of himself?" he asked Tom. "Rachel hasn't been feeling well all week."

"Jack, please ---"

"Go on," Tom said as he raised a quick eyebrow at Helna. "You're seeing Dr. Howard tomorrow, right?"

"I can fit you in during Jack's class," Helna offered. She worked in his office.

"As long as it will make Jack stop fussing over me, that would be great."

"I'm sorry you don't feel well, Rachel," Hideki said as she and Jack got up. "Are you sure you want me and Raoul to stay? I mean, it's no problem ---"

"No, please, have fun," she interrupted with a smile. She was nauseous again. "Jack can come back an---"

"_No_." The forcefulness of his tone made Rachel jump a little and stare at him. Jack shook his head, his lips pursed tightly. "No," he said in a more gentle voice. "I'm not leaving you home alone." Then he kissed her to take any lingering sting from his words.

"Go on," Raoul said. "Get some rest. We're here until Sunday night, and we're here to relax; you don't need to entertain us all the time." He was smiling, too, and Rachel had to gulp back sudden tears as she nodded.

"Okay, then. Come on . . ." Jack led her to the car and wouldn't listen to her apologies for interrupting their evening. "Are you okay to drive?" He'd fret if she didn't let him drive, so Rachel grudgingly handed over her keys and got in the passenger side. "Thank you."

"I'm not dying, Jack. It's just the flu or something."

"Well, get it checked out tomorrow." He pressed the back of his hand to her forehead. "You're not fevered."

Rachel smiled as she lay her head back against the head rest. "That's good." Then she reached over and took his hand. "Thank you, Jack."

"For what?"

"For taking care of me."

He chuckled. "It's what I promised to do, you know."

"I know. I love you."

"Me, too."


	10. Chapter 10

Jack was sitting on the porch railing when Hideki and Raoul were dropped off. He had bottle of root beer in one hand and sighed a little as he pressed it to his lips without drinking.

"Is she asleep?" Hideki asked as he sat on the steps. Raoul sat behind him, giving him a back rub.

"Yeah." He was staring out at the ocean as Rory jumped up next to him and started cleaning himself. "She's been tired all week."

"It's probably just a stomach bug. She might not be fully adjusted to this time zone yet, either."

"Maybe. That's not what I'm worried about."

All three men were silent for a while before Raoul cleared his throat. "Look, uh . . . I've got some friends in the area. We've done about everything we can in Gotham," he said when Hideki looked up and started to protest. "I'll see what my guys can find out here."

"I don't like it," Hideki grouched, taking Raoul's hands and holding them to his chest. "How long's it been since you've talked with these homies of yours?"

"Oh, we keep in touch. We grew up together, Hideki."

He pursed his lips and leaned back into Raoul, then sighed. "Okay. Why does everyone here have mob connections but me?"

"What, no Yakuza buddies back in Japan?" Jack asked as he took a gulp of his drink.

"Not that I know of. Look, Raoul's friends will put the word out, but call us if anything happens, all right?"

Jack slid off the railing and settled next to Hideki and Raoul, leaning over to kiss Hideki's cheek with a partial grin. "Sure."

"I mean it, Jack."

"The FBI's probably going to take over the case; it's gotten too big for the local police. They're going to make a mess of it. But there are a few things I need you to do for me once you get back to Gotham. It's all in your bags."

"You don't have to let more women die, you know."

Jack sighed and drummed his fingers on his leg. "Yeah, I do. I have to wait until he comes after me. Looking for him isn't going to help. I just need to play his game for a few more months, then it'll be over."

"You know what he's waiting for, don't you?"

"I know exactly what he's waiting for, and I'm going to give him exactly what he thinks he wants." Jack stared down at the sand. "He just doesn't realise it's not what he really wants."

"Have you called Dr. Morgenson lately?" Hideki asked.

"I talk with him every week."

"But have you talked with him about _this_? This, this little plan of yours."

"It's not a plan, so much as vaguely structured premeditated murder." Jack's lips twitched as he raised his bottle and peered into it.

"So you haven't."

"And you two aren't going to, either."

"Do you know how illegal this is?" Raoul put in. "We can get someone out here twenty-four/seven, you know. If you're well-protected, he's going to get angry and make a mistake."

"He's working his way toward me," Jack replied dryly. "Cutting him off from me's just going to make him pitch a fit and kill more people. Trust me, I know this guy. If you want to keep the casualties to a minimum, give me five months."

"Five months is a long time, at the rate he's going."

"And he's going to stop in a few weeks, catch his breath, let me worry until I'm ready to go insane. Which is what he wants. I'm not really his real goal, anyway."

They were quiet for a moment before Hideki spoke up. "No."

"No?"

"No. You're not giving him what he wants."

Jack snorted at the tight panic in his friend's voice. "I've got it covered, if you do your job right."

"Rachel needs you, Jack."

He closed his eyes, but only briefly. "Not after this is over, she won't. She'll need you two."

Now Hideki jumped up and glared down at Jack. "I can't believe you're thinking of doing this, Jack! You're doing so good out here; why do you want to ruin everything?"

"Think I should give her a baby?" the object of his ire mused. "I mean, I'd rather hold out until this is over, but _I_ might not come back. But it's just one more weakness, you know? Something to be used against me."

"You're not even listening to me, are you? Raoul!"

"I think this is too dangerous for you to do, Jack," Raoul agreed.

Jack sighed and stood up, rubbing his scars slowly. Hideki flinched a little. "Look, guys, I've thought this through. I've got some backup once you get home, and Rachel's going to be well taken care of. I think . . . three months, then we'll start trying for a baby. At least she'll have something . . ."

"It's going to kill Rachel to lose you."

He pursed his lips at Hideki's soft voice. "Not as permanently as it will if she doesn't."

"And you're just going to keep this dirty little secret all to yourself?"

Jack looked up at Hideki and nodded. "Yeah, I am. Rachel doesn't need to worry, and she'll just get in the way if I tell her now." He rubbed his temples. "Look, this isn't easy for me to do. I don't iwant/i to do it. I just don't have much choice, you know? I need to get him off my back, and I need to make sure this never happens again. If I have to disappear to do it . . ."

"You talk about death in funny terms," Hideki muttered. Neither he nor Raoul were happy with Jack's decision. "What are we supposed to tell Rachel when she asks us why we didn't stop you?"

"Tell her you didn't know. Tell her I thought it was worth . . ." He had to purse his lips as his eyes started stinging and his chest tightened. "That I thought it was worth it, to make sure she wasn't in danger any more because of me." His voice came out strangled despite his best efforts. "It's worth it so long as she's safe."

"I hate that you have a good point," Hideki growled as he turned away. "I'm going to bed. You coming, Raoul?"

"Yeah." He paused, though, and Jack felt two sets of hands on his shoulders and in his hair. "We're here for you, Jack. None of us want to lose you."

Jack leaned into the double embrace and nodded. "I'll keep that in mind."

***

"Rachel? Dr. Howard's ready for you," Helna called from the doorway.

"Does this visit include a urine sample?" she asked as she jumped up. "I really have to go."

Helna just smiled as she gestured for Rachel to get on the scale and fiddled with it. "As a matter of fact, it does. Doctor, you've met Rachel."

Dr. Phillip Howard took the hand Rachel offered with a smile. "I couldn't forget, not after the last time you had a cold."

Rachel groaned and shook her head. "I'm so sorry about that, Doctor. Jack . . . over-reacts, sometimes." Like yelling at the top of his lungs the previous winter when she'd been hit with a sudden cold that he'd assumed was pneumonia, or worse.

Dr. Howard laughed. "It's not a problem. So, what brings you in today?"

"I got the flu or something when I was in California last week; Jack wants me screened for cancer, polio, rabies, and African SARS." The doctor was laughing as he showed her into an examination room. "And really, I'll take a urine test now, if you need one."

"Please do; I need just a minute more, anyway."

"Oh, thank you so much," Rachel said as she set her purse down and slid out the door. She'd been having to pee more often for the past week or so. Jack had told her he was going to start rationing her water if she didn't stop.

A few minutes later she was sitting on the exam table and Dr. Howard was taking her temperature. "So, what are your symptoms? Fatigue, nausea, cough? Stuffy nose?"

"Just the first two," Rachel told him before he held her tongue down and looked down her throat.

"Hm. You're not fevered. How long as this been going on?"

"About a week and a half."

"And your last menstrual cycle was the beginning of last month?"

She nodded. "I should have started this week, actually. I'm probably still readjusting from the trip. My breasts have been sore for a few days, so I should start soon."

"So you're about five days late, then." The doctor nodded and made a note. "I don't think you're sick, Rachel. You're on birth control; how long have you been on it?"

She blinked at him. "A couple years. Why?"

"Were you sick last month? Start any new medications or supplements? Have you been under any stress?"

Rachel's heart skipped a beat as she looked at the doctor suspiciously. "No . . . I've been taking the pills every day." Then she shrugged. "Jack and I were arguing about children for a while, but we've decided to wait."

Doctor Howard nodded as he sighed. "Well, we're running a few tests that Helna requested, but . . . are you and your husband just using the Pill, Rachel? No condoms, spermicide . . . ?"

"Uh . . . no, just the Pill." Now Rachel was starting to worry and she bit her lower lip as one hand went to her stomach. "I can't be pregnant, Doctor Howard."

He sighed a little and nodded. "The Pill's only about ninety-five percent effective, Rachel, when taken correctly and with no complications. If you've been sick or under a lot of stress, that can reduce the effectiveness."

Rachel couldn't believe what she was hearing. "No, you don't understand. I mean, I'd love kids, I _want_ kids, but Jack _doesn't_. He's really not ready for them."

"We'll find out in a few minutes," Dr. Howard said soothingly. "And you may just have a bit of the stomach bug, but Helna wanted to run a pregnancy test for you."

"_Helna_?" Rachel said incredulously. "That's why she was pushing for me to come in today. Ugh, I'm going to tell her a thing or two . . ."

The doctor just smiled. "Is Jack available right now, Rachel?"

She couldn't be pregnant. Jack was going to think she'd done it on purpose. He was going to be _so_ mad at her . . . "He's teaching his dance class."

"Do you want him here when the test results are in?" Howard asked gently.

Rachel shook her head. "He's going to pitch a fit if I'm pregnant, Doctor. _If_ I am, I want to tell him in private."

"Well, there are always . . . options . . . if you don't feel ready for a child. I'm not recommending anything," Howard said when Rachel's eyes got even wider, "I just want you to know that you have several options available to you at this point. Whatever you decide, I'd recommend you talk it over with your husband first." He gathered his papers. "The tests should be done by now. If you'll excuse me . . . ?"

Rachel swallowed sharply and nodded, and Howard closed the door as he left. Her hands started shaking as soon as the door clicked shut, and Rachel's stomach heaved as tears sprung to her eyes. She rubbed her arms, then clenched her hands together and tried to think. Nausea, extremely tired . . . those were signs of just being sick. She'd assumed her period had just been thrown off by her trip, and the stress she'd been under because of Jack's obstinate refusal to think of having children. And she'd been taking the Pill every day.

. . . And she'd been taking the Pill every day. Rachel's hands flew to her stomach and she stared down at it in growing horror. If she was pregnant, what was that going to do to the baby? She hadn't accidentally hurt it, had she?

There was a knock on the door and she shakily called out for the doctor to come in. Helna followed him with a somewhat guilty look on her face and Rachel tried not to glare at her.

"Well," Dr. Howard said as he held a piece of paper and looked it over, "the test was positive."

Rachel didn't know if she wanted to laugh or cry. "Is there any chance that it's a false positive?" she asked.

"Not really. You'd be about five weeks along by now, but we can give you a full prenatal check-up today if you'd like. We need to check on several things . . . Rachel? Are you all right?"

She shook her head sharply. This wasn't how she'd imagined finding out. Not by a long shot. "Uhm . . . does it have to be today? I just . . . I need a little time."

"Okay, but I want you to stop taking the Pill, and come in next week. Tuesday, all right? I have a two o'clock open."

Rachel sighed. "Okay."

Howard looked between her and Helna. "Have a good day, Rachel. I'll see you on Tuesday."

Helna cleared her throat and finally met Rachel's gaze. "I'm sorry, Rachel. I didn't start to wonder until last night, and I couldn't get you alone to ask."

Rachel reached out and took her hand, squeezing it with a smile. "It's okay, Helna. Thank you. I just . . ." She burst into tears and Helna hugged her tight.

"It'll be all right. You didn't see Jack when you were gone, Rachel. I mean, the way he was taking care of Janet and Susie, picking them up from school with Tom, letting them stay over . . . He swears up and down that he hates kids and doesn't want any, but he really does, Rachel. He came over a few times for dinner and as soon as Tom and I left the room, he was holding Mitzi and talking to her. He's going to love the idea, once he gets used to it."

"Before or after he accuses me of deliberately not taking my pills just to get pregnant?" Rachel asked irritably. "He's going to be angry before he's happy, Helna. Plus there's something bothering him that he's not telling me about."

"He's worried about the murders," Helna reasoned. "It's natural." She looked up at the clock. "Class was out ten minutes ago. Do you want someone there when you tell him?"

Rachel shook her head. "No, it'll be best if I tell him alone." She stood up and took her purse from Helna. "Thank you, though."

"Well . . . call if you need someone."

"I will," Rachel promised. Helna saw her out and Dr. Howard gave her a bottle of prenatal vitamins, which she tucked deep in her purse before thanking them both again. She took a deep breath before pushing the office doors open.

Just as she'd thought, Jack was waiting for her and looked her over suspiciously. "What took you so long?"

"Checking for African SARS takes a while," Rachel replied. Jack blinked before he looked down and scratched the back of his neck.

"Is he still mad about last time?"

She hugged him tightly and shook her head. "No, sweety. He's not mad." But _Jack_ was going to be.

He tilted her chin up. "What's wrong? Are you all right?"

"Yeah, yeah, he just gave me some pills to take. Just some vitamins. He, uhm, wants me to come back on Tuesday at two, but I'm fine, Jack." She pulled him down for a kiss and wasn't sure if he believed her or not, but he let it go and slung his arm around her shoulder.

"Good. Let's have some food. You hungry? You barely touched dinner last night, or breakfast, so you ought to be."

"I'm starving," Rachel replied, leaning into him. He'd noticed, then. Now he was going to try to force-feed her for the next week. Which was probably a good thing, she figured as she ghosted her hand over her lower stomach. She was eating for two, now.

"There you are!" Hideki called as she and Jack rounded the corner to the deli. "Had to send a search party. Augh, this kid's insane!" He was trying to get Susie off of his leg as she shrieked with laughter.

"She likes Jack; is it any wonder?"

"Susie, did you hear that?!" Jack asked indignantly.

"Be nice to Jack, Miss Rachel!" the girl demanded, but she was preoccupied with her assault on Hideki. "Can we go swimming?!"

"Yeah! I want to go swimming!" Hideki seconded as he grabbed her by the ankles and lifted her up.

"I'll have to call Mom and ask," Janet said with a small glare at Jack.

"Then call her," he replied with his own glare. Rachel raised her eyebrows, but neither was about to tell her why they weren't getting along.

"Fine," she said with a bite to her tone. She flipped her phone open and stared at Jack as it rang. "Hey, Mom. Jack," and she stressed his name slightly, "wants to know if we can go swimming with him and Rachel. You know. His wife."

"Janet," Jack said warningly.

"Is everything okay?" Rachel asked.

He was still staring hard at the girl. "Yeah. It's fine."

He was lying to her. Then again, _she_ was lying to _him_. But that didn't make either of them right. Rachel turned to Susie as the girl tugged at her hand.

"Yes, sweety?"

"Come and eat, Miss Rachel. Jack got you a sammich already."

"Mom says it's all right," Janet said.

"Yay!"

Jack was still staring at her. "Let's talk," he suggested as he took her gently by the elbow.

"I don't want to," Janet said evenly, her chin jutting out stubbornly.

"Let's _talk_," Jack insisted. His voice was pleasant, and he was smiling slightly, but his grip was firm as he pulled her around the corner. "What do you think you're doing, Janet?"

She blinked and the skin around her eyes tightened. "I don't know what you're talking about."

He crossed his arms over his chest. "I think you do. Stop playing games with me, Janet." Her lips thinned, but the girl wasn't giving in. "Nothing happened between your mother and I, and Rachel doesn't need to know about it."

"That's _lying_, Jack," she snapped, her fists on her hips.

"You know," he cut her off, "you're really starting to piss me off, Janet. _Nothing happened_, therefore Rachel doesn't need to know about it, because it didn't happen. I'm not having an illicit affair with your mother, now or ever. _If_ Rachel ever needs to know I slept in the same bed as your mother, _I_ will be the one to tell her. Do you understand me, Janet?"

She looked amazed. "Don't you feel the slightest bit guilty?"

"If I'd done something wrong, I would, but I didn't do anything wrong." He shook her arm a little to make sure his message was getting through. "Now, can we go back and have a pleasant afternoon, please?"

Janet swallowed sharply and looked at her feet as she nodded. "Okay."

"And you're going to keep your mouth shut about things that aren't your business?"

"_Yes_," she hissed.

Jack grinned and kissed her cheek. "Good girl. Let's go." He gestured for her to go, then followed her as he whistled aimlessly.

***

An hour later found the group sporting in the waves. Rachel had tried to sit it out, but Jack had dragged her off of her blanket and into the water, ducking down before coming back up with her on his shoulders. Susie was on Hideki's shoulders and Janet was on Raoul's as each team tried to shove the other down.

Rachel shrieked as she gripped fistfuls of Jack's hair to keep her balance. Even soaking wet, his head was warm against her abdomen and she stared down at the dark mop of curls. Would their baby have his hair? Would it look like him more, or her? She licked her lips and glanced up in time to see Raoul shove Jack in the chest, sending them both backwards into the ocean.

Jack twisted under the water, wrapping his arms around her and somehow he found the bottom, because with a heave they were breaking the surface, gasping for air. Rachel clung to Jack and was glad the water hid her tears, because then he'd _realy_ worry.

"You okay?" he asked as her legs around his waist tightened.

Rachel coughed and nodded. "I'm all right."

"We win!" Janet was howling as she raised her fists in the air. "That _that_, losers!"

Jack was laughing as he slid the tips of his fingers under the hem of Rachel's bikini bottoms. Rachel tried to squirm out of his grasp.

"_Jack_, now is _not _the time!" she hissed at him. He was grinning, trying to pull her away from the group and into deeper water, still tugging at her bikini.

"Why not?" he asked. "It's been a while since we've had sex out here . . ."

"And we have _guests_ over!" Rachel said firmly, trying not to laugh.

"Well, shit, tell 'em to go away." He was still laughing when Rachel's stomach heaved and she threw up. Then he stopped. "Holy shit! Are you all right? You said you weren't sick!" Rachel was gagging as Jack swept her up in his arms and carried her up the beach. Their friends called after them. "She just needs to rest," Jack called over his shoulder. In a lower voice, "What the hell's going on, Rachel?"

She crossed her arms over her stomach and frowned. "I just gulped down a mouthful of salt water, Jack. I'm ---"

"Not eating, hardly sleeping, in and out of the bathroom all day long, sick to your stomach . . . do you want me to go on?" he asked sharply as he pushed the kitchen door open and then set her on the table. He left long enough to grab a towel, his warm brown eyes big and worried as he rubbed her dry. "You're moody as hell, too." Jack sat in front of her, her heels resting on the very edges of the chair's seat. He cupped her cheeks with both hands and traced his thumbs along her cheekbones, managing to look like a kicked puppy despite his scars, which were twisted into a tight-lipped frown. "What did the doctor tell you, Rachel?"

"Jack . . ." Tears sprung to Rachel's eyes as she took his hands and moved them to her lower abdomen. He tilted his head down to follow the movement, then rolled his eyes back up to her face as he raised his eyebrows.

Rachel took a deep breath and smiled softly at him as she pressed his fingers into her stomach. "I want you to meet your baby," she murmured.


	11. Chapter 11

"_I want you to meet your baby._"

Jack's jaw dropped slightly as he stared up at Rachel.

"My . . . baby?" he choked out. He didn't . . . she wasn't . . . couldn't . . . His gaze fell back to the smooth skin of her stomach and he felt the tenseness in her muscles as he dug his fingers in, moving them around as if he could feel the new life growing in her.

This. Ruined. _Every thing_.

". . . Jack?" Rachel's voice was shaky as she took him by the wrists and pushed his hands back slightly, just so he wasn't leaving red marks in her skin. "I'm sorry, Jack. I know you wanted to wait, and I was all right with that, I promise ---"

"Shut up," he told her absently. "Just shut up." He wasn't sure what he was feeling. Anger, to be sure, boiling anger that everything he'd been working for had been upset. Anger that he'd been denied the conscious decision to produce a child. Suspicion that Rachel had stopped taking her pills, or skipped a day or two, anything to conceive. Heart-stopping fear, oh yes. Jack's chest was suddenly tight with fear as he stared at the soft curve of Rachel's stomach. His own stomach was almost sick with it. And . . . mixed in with it all . . .

Jack looked up at Rachel's tear-streaked face and then lowered his head and pressed his lips to her stomach. He was . . . he was happy. He was _ecstatic_. He was going to have Mitzi-thing of his _own_ to hold and cuddle and _teach_ things to.

"Did you do this on purpose?" he asked softly.

Rachel hiccuped as she cried. "God, no, Jack, I promise I didn't. Dr. Howard said that being sick, or under a lot of stress, can reduce the effectiveness of the pills, and they're not one hundred percent effective to start with . . ."

"So . . . me being so obstinate about not wanting a kid is the reason you got knocked up?" Even through his shock, the irony of the situation made Jack laugh. He sat back with his hands on Rachel's thighs and smiled up at her. "You have no idea how furious I am right now, do you?" The hesitant smile that had been creeping across his wife's lips faltered. She covered his hands with hers, tears falling out of her beautiful green eyes as Jack stood up. He ran his hands through his hair and cursed as he kicked the wall. "How long have you known?"

"Just today, Jack. That's why Helna wanted me to come in today; I honestly didn't think it was anything but the flu, Jack, I promise." He wasn't taking it as _badly_ as Rachel had feared he would, but she'd hoped he'd be at least a little happy. "I didn't . . . I'm sorry."

Fa --- par --- Jack shook his head sharply; he wouldn't let himself _think_ the words, much less say them aloud, no matter how they tried to worm their way into his brain. Rachel was crying softly, holding the towel around her shoulders and his ass-radar went off, pinging directly at him. It was with a heavy sigh that he stopped kicking the wall and went back to the table, hugging Rachel tightly. Fath ---

"You make things so difficult, sometimes," he whispered in her ear as he rocked her. "You just don't realise . . ."

She raised her teary face and trembling lips and sniffled. "Aren't you . . . I mean . . . are you _that_ against having children?" she asked.

Jack stuck his tongue between his lower lip and teeth and shrugged. "Well . . . right now . . . yeah, I kinda am." She could get rid --- Some part of Jack that he hadn't known was there shut that thought down so quickly that he blinked from it. He tried the thought again. She could get --- No, no, wasn't working. Well. _That_ was interesting. Jack was so multi-faceted, he amazed himself sometimes.

"What do you want to do?" Rachel asked quietly.

Well, _there_ was a trap if he'd ever heard one. "What do you mean?"

"I want you to want this baby, Jack. I know you're not really gung-ho about the idea of being a father," and he flinched at the word, "but aren't you at least a _little_ excited? Or is everyone completely wrong and you absolutely loathe children no matter how kind you are to them?"

"I didn't want a kid right now," Jack said firmly, "because there's a damned murdered on the loose who will shit his _pants _when he finds out you're pregnant. It puts you in more danger, Rachel."

She was shaking her head. "Jack, these murders ---"

"Have everything to do with us," he finished. "You know it, too, don't you?"

"What do you want me to do, Jack? Run back to Gotham and hope Batman saves me?"

"No, but I do want to talk with Bruce when you tell him the news." Rachel almost jumped out of her skin and gave him a horrified look. Jack raised his eyebrows at her. "What? You _are_ going to tell him, right?"

She swallowed sharply. "A . . . about what?"

"This," he told her, pressing his palm into her stomach.

The look of relief on her face made Jack want to laugh as he pressed the heel of his hand down on her pubic bone. There was a . . . a _thing_ inside of her, somewhere below his hand. A thing that _he'd_ helped to make. Oh, shit, he was going to be a father. Jack's knees wobbled and he sat back down in the chair heavily, resting his forehead against Rachel's stomach as he shivered.

"Well, not right now . . . we can wait to tell people, Jack . . . Jack, what's wrong now?" She was touching him, her fingers running over his head and pressing into his shoulders. "Please talk to me, Jack. Please. Just talk to me."

"What do you want me to say?" he mumbled. "I like how we are now, just the two of us. I don't want to share you, not with Batman, not with a baby, not with anybody. Not on a long-term basis. I don't want you _or_ a kid caught up in these murders. I don't want this guy to get a hold of you. I don't want to learn the hard way that I'm as bad as . . . as bad at raising kids as . . . as the people who raised _me_. I do _not_ want to hurt either of you." He'd slowly looked back up at her. "You don't know how violent I still am, Rachel. I've never stopped wanting to kill just for the hell of it. I'm not a good person . . . I'm just good at faking it."

Rachel gripped his hair tightly and leaned down, pulling him up to kiss him firmly. "The first time you come at either of us in anger," she said against his lips, "I'll blow your fucking guts out. But you're _not_ going to do that, Jack, because you love me, and you're going to love this baby. Say it."

"Say what?" he asked. His eyes were just a little bit wide as Rachel slid into his lap and put his hand on her stomach again.

"Acknowledge the baby, Jack. Tell me that this is _our_ child. _Your_ child."

"Fine, it's our ---"

Her grip on his hair tightened, pulling the small hairs that always hurt the most. "The _baby_, Jack. Him, her, I don't care what gender you say, you are inot/i going to distance yourself from this child. _Tell me_."

Jack swallowed and placed his free hand at the small of Rachel's back as he rubbed her stomach. "This . . . baby . . . is our baby," he forced out. "This is my baby." Each mention of the thing as something human, as a potential person, solidified it just a little more in Jack's mind. He really ought to pack her up and ship her to Wayne. She'd be safer there.

Rachel smiled at him, hugged him tightly. "I love you," she whispered. "You're just as important to me now as you were before."

"That's not what I'm worried about," Jack said. Then he looked to the side. "Well, maybe a little. But it's not important. A baby . . ."

He was having a hard time saying what he felt and Rachel smiled as she kissed his nose. "You'll have your very own Mitzi-thing to play with," she tried. Jack's eyebrows went up as his gaze returned to her.

"How big is it?"

Rachel blinked. "I'm . . . not sure. Dr. Howard can tell us on Tuesday. I mean, if you want to come to the appointment."

He frowned at her. "Why shouldn't I be there? It's mine, isn't it?"

"Of course the baby's yours," Rachel replied, and told herself firmly that Jack hadn't meant to sound like he was questioning the paternity of the child. "I just didn't know if you wanted to come with me or not."

He pushed her gently off of him and stood, shaking his finger in her face as he glared at her. "Well, I do. And you'd better take good care of it, too. Just relax and . . . do all the, the baby-making stuff you're supposed to do." She got a finger in the stomach, poking toward her uterus as Jack raised his eyebrows warningly. "No funny business."

It was all Rachel could to do keep from howling with laughter as she nodded in obedience. Jack gave her and her womb another suspicious glare before he edged around her like she was a wild animal, heading back outside. When she'd finished laughing and brushed her teeth, Rachel followed and this time Jack didn't complain when she settled on the blanket she'd laid out before. He barely registered her presence, in fact, sporting in the waves like she hadn't just radically altered his entire life. He'd start to freak out later, and then calm down for a while before freaking out once more; Rachel was used to the way Jack dealt with stress. The cycle would repeat until he'd finally come to terms with her pregnancy. She just had to hold out until then.

***

Janet was curled up against Jack, one hand resting on his bare chest, her head cushioned on his arm. He hadn't wrapped it around her, just left it flung out, and while she felt wonderfully queasy at the thought of him maybe tracing his fingers along her shoulder, the fact that he'd let her lay this close to him in the first place made her feel like fainting. She didn't even care that Susie was leached on to his other side; in fact, she was glad for it. Jack was so absorbed with telling her sister stories about fighting with Batman that he wasn't paying any attention at all to Janet herself.

She wanted to know where he'd gotten all his scars. She could understand the big ones, like the gut wound he'd claimed had been an alien baby bursting out (much to Susie's horrified delight), but the others, the short, tiny scars that went from his collar bone to his waist and his upper arms . . . _those_ made Janet curious. They made her . . . she could have laughed at herself, if only she wasn't sure it would draw Jack's attention to her and make him push her away. She wanted to kiss them. She wanted to press her lips to them, maybe . . . maybe lick them a little. Would he like that? What would it feel like to kiss him? Janet had been a good girl all her life; she'd never done more than peck a boy on the lips and was vaguely afraid of French kissing. The thought of a slimy tongue in her mouth . . .

If she thought about kissing _Jack_ like that, though, Janet found that she was all right with the idea of someone sticking their tongue in her mouth. She'd almost fallen down when he'd slid his arm around her waist and pulled her up against him earlier. True, he'd dunked her under the waves after that, but Janet hadn't been about to complain. She'd been in love with Jack since she'd first met him. She'd been at Mr. Bowen's when he and Rachel had stopped in for a visit, slumped in a chair in the waiting area as her mother cried in Mr. Bowen's office. She'd barely glanced up when Rachel had walked in, but she'd done a double take; Rachel was easily the classiest, most self-confident woman Janet had ever seen in person. She was poised, she was stylish, she was beautiful, she just _radiated_ big-city charm . . .

And then, then she'd looked behind her as the door closed and pursed her lips, pulling it open again and reaching her perfectly manicured hand out. There had been a groan from the hallway as she'd dragged in a man with curly, chin-length dark blond hair, who obviously hadn't wanted to be there. He'd been muttering to himself and she'd shushed him, taking his hands away from her hips and pushing him toward the empty chair next to where Janet was sitting.

He'd been such a _contrast_ to Rachel, his hair obviously not brushed, his jeans faded and worn, the knees torn almost completely out. He'd been wearing a white long-sleeved shirt under a purple t-shirt, and his shoes had been as scuffed-up as his jeans as he'd flopped bonelessly into the indicated chair. Rachel had leaned over to talk with Mr. Bowen's receptionist and Jack had turned to Janet and jerked his head at Rachel with a grin, indicating the way her A-line skirt stretched across her rear and obviously pleased by it. Then he'd noticed that Janet had been staring at the scars on his face, morbidly fascinated by them and he'd scratched at the curly one.

He'd reached into his pocket and pulled out a Tootsie Roll, twitching it back and forth in front of her as he'd arched an eyebrow. "It's not nice to stare," he'd murmured out of the corner of his mouth, still grinning. Then Rachel had turned around and raised her eyebrows at him, and he'd pointed at Janet. "It's hers. Her candy. I tried to say no, but she wouldn't listen. Look, kid, I already told you, I'm not allowed Tootsie Rolls for a week." Then he'd taken her hand and dropped the candy into it, turning back to Rachel with an innocent look on his face.

"Quit trying to scare children," was all she'd said. Janet had bristled a little --- she was _thirteen_, not a _child_. "And don't start trouble."

But Jack was still grinning, slinging his arm around her shoulder. "This is my new friend," he'd claimed before turning back to a wide-eyed Janet, who had just realised that this couple was the Jack and Rachel Dawes who were moving to town. She was being half-hugged by the Joker. "What's your name, friend?"

Janet had started stuttering, terrified of the grinning man next to her. His scars had pulled down into a frown and she hadn't been able to take her eyes off of them, not until Rachel had grabbed his ear and dragged him to the next chair as he'd started whining about her hurting him.

"_Jack_, I _said_ not to cause trouble. What part of 'don't cause trouble' did you find hard to understand?"

"All of it," he'd quipped, then whined again. "I was just making friends . . . owww, stop hurting me! That's my ear, I need it . . . Come on, friend, help a guy out!"

He'd seemed so . . . so _harmless_. Funny. Mysterious. Vaguely sinister in the way his eyes took everything in, not to mention the scars on his face. And he was grinning at her, still grinning, like he was trying to share a marvellous joke with her and was eager for her to get the punchline.

"Mrs. Dawes, Mr. Bowen will see you now," Ms. Holloway had said as Rachel had been watching Jack like a hawk, glaring slightly if he did anything she disapproved of, and after a few minutes he'd been quietly drawing on a pad of paper Rachel had given him, his tongue flicking over his lips every once in a while. That had frightened Janet even more, because what sort of woman would be able to _glare_ the Joker into submission?

Mr. Bowen had come out then, leading her sniffling mother and Janet had jumped up, hugging the woman's arm tightly as Jack looked up with another grin, and he'd grinned at her until the door closed, Mr. Bowen introducing himself to Rachel.

Rumours had spread like wildfire. Janet had told a few friends about meeting the Joker, but no one had believed her until Tommy Rivera had burst in to home-room one morning, yammering about running into the Joker as he was about to cross the street with his wife. It hadn't been the running into that meant Tommy had simply seen the man; he'd actually run headlong into him, almost knocking him over as he'd been rushing to school. He'd been rooted to the spot with fear as the Joker had glared at him, he'd said, then his 'totally hot' wife had grabbed his ear and told him to stop trying to scare kids.

Tommy had managed to stutter an apology and the Joker had just grinned at him, then grinned at his wife and turned away. Tommy had said he'd been lucky to be alive, and that if Rachel hadn't been there, the Joker probably would have killed him. They'd all believed him, and soon enough, their parents had confirmed that the man who had been the Joker before most of them had been born had indeed moved to town.

There'd been a _huge_ town meeting about it. Almost no one had wanted him to be there, despite the fact that he was married to Gotham City's District Attorney, or that her mother had owned the beach house they'd moved into for years, and the older residents remembered Bethany Dawes and her cute little daughter, Rachel, with fondness. It had surprised Janet, who had tagged along with her friend Amy, that Mr. and Mrs. Dawes had been at the meeting, sitting in the back quietly. Jack had turned at one point and noticed Janet, because he grinned and took out another Tootsie Roll, tossing it to her with a wink. Without even looking, Rachel had reached out and cupped his cheek, turning his face back to the front of the room.

Then Jack had been called on to defend himself. He'd blinked at the room in surprise, then coughed and scratched the back of his neck.

"I just uh . . . I just do whatever she tells me to," he'd said as he'd pointed to his wife. "I mean, she's got a _really_ nice rack, and she just sorta," and he puffed his chest out a bit, "and, well . . ."

"_Jack_!" Rachel had snapped, standing up and placing her hands on her hips as she glared at him.

His eyes had followed her chest as he nodded with a blank smile. "Yes, Rachel." It had produced a few nervous laughs, which had made him grin again.

"My husband hasn't had a violent outbreak in eight years," she'd went on calmly, looking around the room. "I understand your fears, but ---"

"I'm more concerned with getting some play than killing anybody, anyway," Jack had broken in. Rachel's eyes had closed briefly as she tried not to yell at him. Janet had been in awe. "Geez. Have a little faith, I mean, what do you want me to do? Teach a dance class? Ooh, can I teach a dance class, Rachel?"

"Shut up and sit down."

Much to everyone's surprise, he'd done just that, glancing at Janet with a shrug. Rachel had gone on to argue their case with such ease and confidence that it had been obvious why Mr. Bowen had offered her a partnership in his law firm without ever having met her before. Jack had settled down after a while, reaching up once to take Rachel's hand in his. She'd continued gesturing one-handed, squeezing his hand and then running her fingers through his curls. That simple act of affection, the way he'd pushed his head up into her fingers, had made Janet melt. He'd come up to her and Amy after the meeting had come to a close.

"Sign up for my dance class, friend," he'd demanded.

"Jack, we don't know if you can teach a dance class," Rachel had said. "Leave the girls alone."

"Ignore her; she's a party-pooper. But you'll sign up, right? Right?" He'd been like a little boy, bouncing eagerly as he nodded and grinned encouragingly at them. They'd nodded, huddled together and shaking with fear and excitement, and Jack had turned back to Rachel triumphantly, hugging her tightly as she'd tried to talk with Mrs. Bowen.

It had taken over a year before the dance class had actually happened. Jack was rarely seen in town on his own unless he was coming to visit Rachel on her lunch break, or when she'd gotten off of work. He'd followed her around like a puppy, a big, moody, sometimes downright grouchy puppy who had scared the daylights out of the Sullivan boys when he'd caught them shoplifting. Janet had heard that he hadn't even needed to threaten them, they were so terrified to look up and find the Joker standing behind them with a scowl and crossed arms as they slipped DVDs into their bulky jackets.

He'd been sitting outside the deli one day and had looked up when Janet had tried to creep past, her heart pounding.

"Friend!" He'd always called her 'friend' when he saw her, never listening when Rachel had corrected him on her name. "Hey, come here, sign up." He'd pushed a sheet of paper at her and watched her look at it blankly. "Come on, don't tell me you forgot you and your friend with the tiny nose said you'd sign up for my dance class!" She'd blushed and hastily scribbled her name down, then Rachel had come out and asked her to have her mother call the office before she'd leaned down to give Jack a kiss. Janet's heart had almost stopped, she'd been so jealous.

Still . . . she'd had to drag Susie along with her when the class finally started, and there'd been a lot of students who were curious as to whether or not the Joker really knew how to dance. Rachel had sat in on the first few classes and just smiled as the Joker --- who had gradually been becoming "Jack" to everyone --- berated, wheedled, praised, and threatened them into learning the dance of the month. Susie had attached herself to Jack almost from the start, and she'd been the one to notice when Jack had met Rachel halfway across the street after a certain class, taking her by the hips and lifting her straight into the air. She'd started squealing about it and then the entire class had started begging Jack to teach them how to do lifts.

Now he was singing softly to Susie as the bonfire kept them warm. Rachel had gone to bed early, and Janet had wondered about that; after she had finally come back to the beach and settled on her blanket, Jack had spent the rest of the evening ignoring her. They'd obviously argued about something; maybe he'd told her about staying the night at Janet's house with her mother? But he'd seemed perfectly relaxed, and Rachel hadn't been in tears, hadn't thrown him out . . . Janet sighed softly and dared to curl her fingers a little, pressing into his chest. Jack took a deep breath, but that could have been part of the song. She closed her eyes and tried very hard not to think of sex.

"Does Jack know how wrong that looks?" Raoul murmured as he stole a kiss from Hideki.

"What, the fifteen-year-old in a skimpy bikini clinging to him? Probably not. He's kind of dense like that, sometimes."

"Did he or Rachel tell you what's wrong, yet?"

Hideki shook his head. "Nope. I'll ask tomorrow." He'd been leaning into Raoul's shoulder, but straightened when Jack finally sat up.

"We're off to bed," he told the two men. "Lock the door when you come in."

"No problem. Good night!"

"Yeah. Off you go, brats. Get." Jack swatted both girls' rumps, which made Susie giggle and Janet jump halfway out of her skin. "Hurry! Rawr! I'ma eat you alive!" Susie took off shrieking, Jack following closely and growling at her. Janet rubbed her rear for a moment, then glanced back at Hideki and Raoul as they laughed before following her sister and Jack.

Once the door closed, Hideki grinned at Raoul and traced his fingers down his lover's chest. "So," he purred, "it's pretty warm out here with the fire." Raoul stretched and nodded, smirking. "And hey, I brought everything we need, and you know it's rude to have sex in someone else's house . . ."

"But not on their beach?" the younger man asked with a laugh.

Hideki pushed Raoul down and leaned over him. "Not on their beach." Raoul laughed again and pulled him down for a kiss.

Inside, Susie was whining. "I don't wanna go to bed, Jack. I wanna stay up with you!"

"I'm not staying up," he reminded her again as he tucked her in.

Big blue eyes stared up at him. "Can I sleep with you and Rachel?"

He chuckled and kissed her forehead. "Not tonight. Go to sleep and we'll go fishing tomorrow." It took a few more minutes before Jack finally just got up and left, turning the bedroom light out but leaving the door cracked and the stairwell light on as he trudged upstairs. Rachel was already fast asleep and he watched her from the doorway for a while. She was so beautiful it took his breath away, and he doubted that she realised that when he teased her about it, he was serious. And now . . .

Now everything was changing. Jack undressed and then sat on the bed carefully before holding his suddenly aching head in his hands. He didn't want Rachel to be pregnant simply because it threw a monkey-wrench in all his vague plans. Other than that . . . Jack slid under the covers and leaned over Rachel carefully, his hand hovering just above her abdomen as he stared at it. Other than that, he was ecstatic. He was terrified. He felt . . . crap, there was a baby in her. His baby. _His_ baby. Jack lay back down and very gently curled up against Rachel while his heart pounded and his eyes pricked a little. His Rachel. His baby. He had so much to live for . . .

That thought made him smile as he relaxed, finally able to get some sleep.


	12. Chapter 12

Jack's hand was shaking a little as it gripped Rachel's. He squinted and frowned.

"What exactly am I looking at?"

Dr. Howard smiled as he tapped the small, light shape in the dark area of the screen, which was surrounded by more light areas. It was all fuzzy; part of the reason Jack was having difficulty. "Right there."

He gave Rachel a worried look as she beamed at him. "And . . . what _is_ it?"

"That's the baby, Jack."

That made Jack tilted his head back in surprise, then he leaned forward to get a closer look at the ultrasound. "It doesn't _look_ like a baby. Are you sure?"

"Jack, he's a doctor," Rachel laughed, kissing the back of his hand. "Of course he's sure. That's our baby, Jack."

He looked mortified, and his palm was getting a little sweaty. "Uh . . . how big is it?"

"About half the size of a baby pea," Howard replied.

"So . . . what's it doing? Just floating there?"

"Not quite," the other man laughed. "The heart should have started beating by now, but you won't be able to hear it for a while. Let me see, though . . ." He fiddled with his instruments and the image on the screen changed, zoomed in a little and the angle tilted. Jack's grip tightened and Rachel winced a little. "And . . ." New data popped up at the bottom of the screen, and Dr. Howard smiled in satisfaction. "There. See that little flutter?"

"Yeah," Jack said warily. He reached out and stroked Rachel's hair, bringing her hand to his lips. "What is it now?"

"That's the heart beating." Jack's eyes bugged out as Rachel looked up at him, and he swallowed sharply as his grip on her hand tightened once more. "The inner ear's formed already, so it might be able to hear you, too. Everything looks fine so far; is your clothing getting a little tight yet?"

"A little bit," Rachel admitted as Jack looked between her stomach and the screen. "Are you okay, Jack?"

He pointed at the ultrasound as he looked at her. "That . . . that's _mine_." He swallowed again and licked his lips before turning his finger to her stomach. "And it's in _there_."

"Yes," Rachel laughed as she nodded, "yes, it is. That's your baby, Jack. Look at what you made." He did look --- he looked long and hard and then he leaned up and pressed his ear to Rachel's stomach gently. She could feel his scars against her skin as he started to smile.

"Hey, in there," he murmured against her skin. The doctor took the hint and left quietly, giving them time together. "Hey, you. Yeah, you. In the belly. Whatcha up to these days, other than making Rachel not want to have sex? She's substituting grapefruit for it, and she usually hates grapefruit. Is that your fault? I bet it is." Rachel was laughing, and he pressed a kiss to her stomach. "You're grounded when you're old enough. You won't know when, you won't know where, but at _some_ point, I'm going to ground you and you won't know why, but it'll be because you denied me sex. Just you _wait_."

Rachel ran her fingers through Jack's hair for a while before Dr. Howard came back in. "Any questions? Jack?"

He sat up and cleared his throat. "Yeah, uh . . . how safe is it to, uhm . . ."

"Have sex?" Dr. Howard shrugged. "It's perfectly safe right now. If everything goes well, you can have sex until Rachel goes into labour. Your main focus needs to be on her comfort, though, and Rachel, if you start to feel actual pain during intercourse, or you notice any bleeding, stop right away and come in as soon as possible. But as long as you're both careful, it won't be a problem."

"What Jack means is when will I start feeling better and _want_ to have sex?" Rachel clarified as Jack frowned. He hated talking about their sex life with strangers. Or anyone, really, no matter how much he teased about it.

"Oh, the morning sickness will go away in a couple of months."

"_Months_?" Jack repeated. "A _couple_ of months?"

"Yes. The body goes through a lot of changes in the first trimester; all of them, actually, but particularly in the first. Rachel's had to prepare for the baby, a whole lot of hormones have started that weren't there before . . ." He'd lost Jack and sighed. "Could you work twenty-four hours in a row of hard labour and then have the energy to do anything other than eat and sleep?"

"Uh . . . no."

"Well, that's what Rachel's body is doing, except it doesn't get a break. There are other activities you can enjoy without actual intercourse."

"I got it, I got it," Jack interrupted. "So . . . six weeks, huh?"

"And two days. That's dated from the last menstrual period; the foetus itself is only four weeks old. Congratulations, Rachel, you've actually been pregnant for an entire month."

"I'm hungry," was all she could think to say.

Dr. Howard laughed. "I bet you are. Go ahead and get dressed; if you don't have any other questions, we're done." He left again after saying his goodbyes.

Jack was hovering over her as Rachel got dressed. She sighed. "I'm not going to break, you know."

"But . . ." He placed his palm on her lower abdomen yet again and Rachel smiled as she pulled her skirt up. It settled low on her hips, but the t-shirt of Jack's that she'd put on ensured that her stomach was out of sight. "It was a grain of rice last week."

Her green eyes danced with laughter as Rachel kissed Jack. "Yes, it was."

"If you keep using food to illustrate the size, I'm eventually going to stop eating."

They were heading right to Tom and Helna's for dinner. Rachel had to force herself to not stop at the deli for a quick sandwich. "Well, rice was the only thing I had handy to show you." She squeezed his hand and smiled at him as he drove. Technically he wasn't supposed to, but Hideki was working on Judge Bowen, and it shouldn't be long before he could get a license again. "Are you sure you're okay, Jack?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "I'm all right. I'm just . . . yeah. I'm good."

For now. He'd had to revise a few things, but the more he thought about it, the more he felt confident that this baby would be good in the coming months. It gave him more of a steady base to work from, if he could keep Rachel safe that long. If, if, maybe, if . . .

His worries didn't stop him from bounding into the living room and swooping Mitzi out of the playpen she was laying in, though.

"Mitzi-thing!" he crowed as Rachel hugged Helna and whispered in her ear. "Now, look, ugly, we've got to talk, all right?" Jack brought her over to her parents and Rachel. "You know you're my main lady, but see, you've got some competition coming your way in a few months. I expect it will be a long, bloody, drawn-out fight and I'm confident you won't hold back in the slightest. But I have to root for the other side, too, understand?"

"_What_ is he babbling about _now_?" Tom asked.

Rachel and Helna were laughing. "Sorry to keep you out of the loop for so long, Tom, but you see ---"

"All hail faulty birth control!" Jack chortled as Mitzi giggled.

"Ex_cuse_ me?" Tom crossed his arms over his chest and glared at the man.

"Yeah, seems Rachel was so stressed about me not wanting kids that it cancelled out her birth control. Ironic, isn't it? She gets knocked up 'cause I don't want her to?"

Tom turned to Rachel with wide eyes. "You're pregnant?!"

"Six weeks and two days," she replied as Jack knelt down to introduce Mitzi to her stomach.

"This is the competition. Get to know it well. It's small right now, but it will grow, and has the advantage of being near me much more than you are, ugly."

Rachel sighed and rubbed the top of Jack's head. "Can I sit down yet?"

Jack stood right back up and led her to the couch. "Sit, sit! Put your feet up."

He managed to get Rachel seated, pull a throw over her lap, get her feet on the footstool, _and_ keep Mitzi balanced and content on his shoulder the whole time. Rachel was laughing at him, and Tom stared.

"So . . . where did you learn to _do_ that?"

"Do what?" Jack asked over his shoulder.

"That. Juggle a baby _and_ a pregnant wife so well."

He snorted. "Nothing to it. I'm good at multi-tasking."

Tom just smiled and shook his head.

***

Jack's fingers tiptoed across her shoulder and down the swell of her breast, and Rachel rolled her shoulder back to get him off of her.

"Jack, please . . . it hurts . . . I'm exhausted . . ." His disappointed sigh was audible in the quiet of the bedroom and Jack pulled away, rolling over. Rachel echoed his sigh and looked over her shoulder. He was laying on his back, the covers around his waist as he stared up at the ceiling with a scowl. "I'm sorry, Jack."

"It's all right. I've got a hand for a reason."

"I'll make it up to you. I promise."

He snorted softly as his scowl slowly disappeared. "You'd better. Two more months of this, Rachel?"

She rolled over and curled up against him, glad when he wrapped his arm around her. "I was fine last night, Jack. Just be a little patient." She yawned as he snorted. "Helna said that when she got to the second trimester, she and Tom were at it like bunnies."

He snorted. "Bunnies, huh?"

Another yawn as she snuggled closer. "Yeah . . . increased blood flow . . . to the pelvic region . . . helps . . ."

He turned slightly to wrap both arms around her and kissed her forehead. "All right, I'll be patient, but only as long as it's exactly like bunnies. I mean long ears and wiggling nose and fluffy tail. Bunnies."

Rachel was half-asleep. She nodded and kissed his shoulder. "Okay . . . bunnies . . ."

Jack's laughter was the last thing she remembered.

***

Rachel was in tears and Jack was ready to hit the wall. She cried when he tried to comfort her, wailed when he tried to leave her alone, and it was all over the way her stupid pants fit. They made her feel 'fat,' she'd sobbed. They didn't fit 'right.' And now she was ugly and he didn't love her any more because he hadn't touched her all week, because she was fat and ugly. It certainly wasn't because she hadn't _let_ him touch her, oh no, it was all _his_ fault.

So Rachel sobbed on the bed as Jack sat in the doorway and leaned back against the frame, staring up at the ceiling as he tried his very best not to yell.

"Rachel," he tried quietly.

"_Shut up_!" she screamed into her pillow.

He rolled his eyes and crawled over to the night stand when her phone went off. 'Mommy,' the front read. Oh, thank the God he didn't believe in. Jack flipped her phone open and turned the speaker phone on as she moaned, and then made a face at her.

"Bethany, I love you. Talk some sense into this woman before I go crazy."

Bethany laughed. "Hello to you, too, Jack. What's wrong?"

"He hates me!" Rachel yelled.

Jack winced. "I do _not_ hate you, woman! Bethany, talk to her. She's out of her mind."

He passed the phone to Rachel, who jerked it out of his grasp and cradled it to her ear. "M, Mommy?"

"Yes, sweety, I'm here. What's going on?"

"Jack hates me because I'm fat and ugly and he won't have sex with me, either!"

"You won't _let_ me!" he exclaimed in frustration, throwing his hands in the air.

"Rachel, listen to me. Why do you think he thinks you're ugly?"

"Because my _pants_ don't fit me right any more!" Rachel whimpered as she wiped at her eyes. Her mother would understand how cruel Jack was being.

Her mother was also trying not to laugh. "Why don't they fit, Rachel?"

"Because," her daughter replied petulantly as she slid on to the floor and cuddled up to Jack. He tensed and leaned away until he realised that she was actually letting him touch her, then hesitantly put his arm around her shoulder as she mumbled something into the phone.

"I'm sorry? What did you say, Rachel?"

"Because I'm pregnant," Rachel said louder.

Now Bethany _did_ start laughing, but she hurried to reassure Rachel before the younger woman freaked out again. "Oh! Oh, you're pregnant?! Oh, Rachel, sweety! Jack still loves you, Rachel, it's just the hormones! You're just moody right now."

"I am?" Rachel asked.

"_Yes_," Jack said firmly as he frowned at her. He _hated_ it when Rachel got moody; his own emotional instability he could handle, but no one else's.

"Yes, you are. How far along are you? When were you going to _tell me_?"

"Ten weeks," was the sniffled answer. "And . . . in a couple more weeks."

Now Rachel was sulking, but at least she wasn't pushing Jack away. He hugged her tightly, kissing her neck and cheek. This wasn't the first breakdown she'd had. The last one had sent him running out of the house, cursing sexual reproduction to hell. Of course, as soon as Rachel had started yelling for him to come back, he'd turned and run right back inside. To say that Jack was under a lot of stress was an understatement, and his only consolation was that the murders had finally stopped for the time being, which meant that he could concentrate on not waking up with a knife in his chest when he accidentally pulled the covers too far off of Rachel in the night.

He ignored the rest of the conversation; it was only Bethany gushing about being a grandmother (_finally_) and advising Rachel on what she should be doing, which included being a lot more patient with Jack.

"He's only a first-time dad, after all," the elder Dawes reasoned with her offspring. "And he's a man. You can't blame him for making mistakes!"

"It's _his_ fault I'm like this," Rachel grouched. Jack opened his mouth to protest but thought better of it, rolling his eyes instead.

"It takes two, Rachel. Now, why don't you go freshen up, and I'm sure Jack will make you some breakfast."

"I _always_ make breakfast," he said plaintively.

"I want hot dogs," Rachel said, then tears started to fall again. "And I'm a vegetarian!"

"You just get ready for work and let me talk to the new daddy, okay, Rachel?"

"Okay . . . I love you, Mom."

"I love you, too, sweety. I'm so happy for you!"

Jack took the phone and turned the speaker off as he stood and helped Rachel up. "Bethany?"

Her voice was warm and most importantly, _sane_. "How are you holding up, daddy?"

Jack clambered down the stairs. "Oh, I'm, well, you know . . ." Then he was in the kitchen and kicked the wall. "I am going out of my _mind_, Bethany! That woman is _crazy_, and _I_ know crazy!"

His mother-in-law was laughing. "She's pregnant, Jack. You haven't seen the worst of it."

He groaned and started to make breakfast as Rachel yelled down the stairs what she wanted, changing her mind five times as he ignored her. "Make it stop, please, make it stop. I can't do a damned thing right. If I try to touch her, she's not feeling well. If I don't try to touch her, suddenly I hate her and she's ugly and fat. She wants eight billion different foods to eat and half of them aren't even in season right now! She can barely sleep, cries at the slightest thing, and I've put on _three_ pounds, I swear I have."

Bethany started laughing again. "Yep, that sounds normal."

"Even me gaining weight?"

"Completely. She should start to feel better in a week or so, though. Just remember that it's all your fault, you're completely wrong, and you swear you'll never do it again. Oh, and she's the most beautiful, amazing, gorgeous woman on the planet and of course you still love her, and no, she's not ugly, being pregnant makes her glow with radiance. Are you taking notes?"

"Mind like a steel trap," he confirmed. "Crap, Bethie, I can't handle much more of this. I mean, it gets better, right?"

"Of course it does. Just in time for waking up four times a night to feed the baby." Her voice was far too cheerful. "Have you been to the doctor yet? How'd you find out?"

"Uh, yeah, we're going in for her second appointment during her lunch today." He leaned back against the counter as Rory sauntered through and gave him a flat-eared, unimpressed look. "Man, though . . . I woke up this morning and looked at her and I can _see_ it now. I mean, I can see that she's getting bigger. She's all . . . round, you know? Just a little." He was grinning, but it faded. "And then _she_ noticed it when she put her pants on and flipped."

Bethany was hooting with laughter. "I bet she did. I was a little farther along with Rachel before I started getting excited about it. Give it a couple more weeks, Jack. Sooner, if you get another ultrasound today. I think she'll calm down if she can _see_ the baby."

"Oh, yeah! Yeah! It's . . . how big is it . . . it's about the size of a lime, or a prune," he told her, his own excitement bubbling up. "Heh, I've got myself a little lime. Come to think of it, if her uterus is about the size of a grapefruit . . . those are about the size of a coconut, aren't they?"

They were both laughing as Jack started singing the song, then Rachel called him from upstairs. "Jack . . . I need your help . . ."

"I've gotta go, Bethie. Thanks, though. You're a lifesaver."

"It's no problem; tell Rachel to call me after her appointment, all right? And hang in there."

"Yeah, sure. Bye." He hung up and went to the foot of the stairs, looking up at Rachel. "What is it, gorgeous?"

She looked down at him, then at her feet. "I . . . what if I trip and fall?"

Great. She wanted a piggy-back ride down the stairs. Jack sighed as he walked up them. "Well, I won't let you fall. Come here." He hoisted her on to his back and Rachel rested her cheek on his shoulder. "Look, I made those tofu eggs that you like. And grapefruit." He wanted to tell her about their lime in the coconut, but decided it would be best to wait a little. Rachel kissed his neck and he shivered as he set her down. "Hey, now, we want you to get to work on time."

"Fine," she mumbled, obediently tucking in to her breakfast as he watched over her. After a minute or so Jack turned and dished his own meal up, and couldn't help it when Rachel smiled at him.

"So . . . the baby's about the size of a lime right now, right?" he asked casually. Rachel nodded. "And your uterus is about the size of a grapefruit. Or, rather . . . a coconut."

"Well . . . yes, that's about right. Why?"

"Come on," he urged, grinning at her. "We've got a lime . . ." She blinked at him. "In a coconut . . ."

Rachel squeezed her eyes shut as she started laughing, and Jack gratefully joined her. "Oh, God . . . a lime in a coconut . . ."

Pure evil slowly rose up from the chair across from Jack, just the tips of its flame-point ears at first, then gradually more, the points on his ears giving way to cream-coloured fur, then his fat, round head with the vertical flame markings. Rory was gradually sniffing his way towards Rachel's plate, being as sneaky as he knew how.

"Hey! Psst!" Jack thumped the table and the cat took off. He rolled his eyes as he stood up. "Want some more?"

"No, I'm full. I am! You gave me three times as much as I normally eat."

"And you ought to eat more; if _I_ have to gain weight, so do you." She'd stood up and taken her plate to the sink, and Jack wrapped his arms around her. He pressed his hands into her lower abdomen as he kissed her neck. "You've got a little pook, there," he murmured in her ear. Rachel giggled while he pinched her belly. "I love it."

"You don't have to say that to make me feel better," Rachel whispered.

He laughed and pressed his hips into her. "I'm not," she was assured as she gasped in surprise. "I really _do_ love it."

She was late for work.

***

"And . . . there."

"Oh my God . . ." Rachel looked up at Jack as he stared at the screen. "It's so much _bigger_. I mean . . . it's moving, now."

It was, too. The baby was bouncing around like a Mexican jumping bean, even if it was most likely due to the pressure Dr. Howard was exerting on Rachel's uterus in various places. The small thing was still moving on its own, though, and Jack was in awe. He took his phone out and absently punched in a number.

"Hello?"

Jack laughed. "Dude, Wayne. You have _no_ idea what I'm looking at right now."

Rachel's eyes went wide as she grabbed for the phone and failed. "Jack! Jack, don't tell him!"

"'Dude'? Since when are you a surfer, Jack? And what are you looking at? I don't have time to guess."

Jack was chortling as he avoided Rachel's grasping hands, his eyes still glued to the ultrasound screen. "Well, if you had a lime . . . and you put it in a coconut . . . and then you put them both in _Rachel_ . . ." There was a few seconds of silence.

Then . . . "Rachel's _pregnant_?!"

That made Jack howl with laughter. "And it's _mine, sucker_! All mine!"

"Jack Dawes, you give me that phone!"

"You sonofabitch, if you hurt Rachel I'll ---"

"You'll what?" he taunted as Rachel gave up and settled back on the examining table. "Piss off, Wayne, I've gotta go. I need to watch my kid move around. Ha!" With that he hung up, still laughing. "Oh, yeah, this is gonna be fun . . ."

"I can't _believe_ you did that, Jack! Dr. Howard, I'm _so_ sorry . . ."

"It's all right," the older man said. "You'll be able to see what sex it is in a couple of weeks, unless you'd rather it be a surprise."

"I don't like surprises," Jack said as Dr. Howard finished what little he had left to examine. "I want to know so I can tell the Mitzi-thing. Crap, we've got to tell Hideki and Raoul, and oh, Janet and Susie will want to know . . ."

Rachel stared. A month ago he'd been against _anyone_ knowing, and now Jack was ready to take out a front-page ad in every major city in the continental United States. He was convinced that Alaska and Hawai'i weren't states because they weren't "united" with the rest of the country.

He pulled her close for a kiss and grinned at her. "And we'll go buy you new clothes this weekend, how about? Unless you want me to make them for you."

Rachel ignored him until she'd thanked the doctor and said goodbye. "Helna said she'd give me her old maternity clothes, actually . . . but if you want, you can make me some," she hurried to assure him as Jack's smile fell a little.

It brightened again and he paused to kiss her, one hand pressing into her womb. "I'll be a good father, right?" he whispered as his headache returned. He'd been getting them more often the past week.

Rachel nodded. "You'll be a great father."

Jack held her tightly as he fought of the headache, fought to stay in control, and then sighed into her perfumed hair. "Good," he murmured. "Good."


	13. Chapter 13

He leaned forward slowly, then pressed a soft kiss to Rachel's abdomen. "Hey, there," he whispered. "You got bigger." It was true; between going to bed the previous night and waking up, Rachel's stomach had noticeably swelled. He knew she needed her rest, but today was especially exciting for him. Today, he'd get to hear their little lime's heart beat. It was technically the size of a peach at the moment, but they'd found the lime-in-a-coconut image to be too hilarious to stop using. Jack hummed contentedly as he continued to send kisses to the baby, and then Rachel's hands were in his hair as she sighed.

"Don't stop," she whispered. Her hips tilted up a little and Jack broke out into a grin; who was he to deny a pregnant woman her cravings? He lavished her baby bump with more licks and kisses, then slid her panties down and tossed them to one side before easing between her thighs.

She tasted a little differently than before. Not unpleasant, and Jack certainly wasn't about to bring it up to his over-sensitive wife as he took a few languid swipes of his tongue to get used to the taste, but different. It absolutely wasn't going to keep him from one of his favourite past-times, either. Rachel was much more easily aroused these days, when she wasn't crying, throwing things, or puking. Like right now, as she whimpered and moaned, her fingers twisting in his curls and pulling sharply. It made Jack groan.

"Please, Jack, please . . ."

He would have loved to draw it out a little more, but Rachel was still plagued with fatigue and nausea, so Jack rubbed her thighs gently as he hummed to himself. It didn't take long before her back arched and she was mewling, and as soon as she'd settled down he wiped his mouth on the sheets, pushed himself up, and kissed her gently. Rachel wrapped her legs around his waist when he tried to move off of her. She was smiling at him, her chest still heaving, her eyes a little cloudy.

"You're not done," she whispered.

Jack coughed and smiled. "I'll be all right. I don't . . . I don't want to hurt you or the baby," he murmured.

"It'll be all right," Rachel assured him as she pulled him down to her. She was arching her back and twisting a little, showing her body off and Jack licked his lips as he pushed past his fears and shifted until he was sitting with Rachel in his lap, then he gently guided himself into her. Rachel sighed with pleasure and let her head fall back as she pulled him closer.

"Tell me if it hurts," he whispered in her ear as he picked up a steady, gentle rhythm. Rachel nodded and he rested his forehead in the crook of her neck, holding her hips a little above his so he could thrust up into her more easily. Her stomach pressed against his like it had never done before and even with her in the relative safeness of his lap, Jack was still afraid he'd squash the baby.

Rachel tilted his head up and kissed him. "It's okay, Jack," she whispered. "You won't hurt us." Then she trailed her nails down his chest, circling just around his nipples before pulling the sharp edge of her thumbs across them while biting down on his lower lip. Jack gasped and pulled her down harder than he'd intended to but Rachel's pleased moan was reassuring. It helped that Rachel knew just how to tighten herself around him in order to make him lose control as quickly as possible; it came in handy when there was a slight issue with him wanting to have sex while she wanted to sleep.

He pressed his lips to hers as he shuddered, then lay his head on her shoulder. Rachel ran her fingers through his hair with a smile.

"I love you, Jack," she whispered.

"Mmm . . ."

"The baby loves you, too."

That made him snort with amusement. "It can't feel emotions."

"You make the same claim, sometimes, but you're lying when you say it." She was rubbing the back of his neck and upper shoulders, making him sigh with delight. "The baby can hear you, you know. Tell it something."

Jack had been massaging her lower back, but now he moved one hand to press gently against her bulging stomach and poked it to make sure the baby knew who he was talking to. "Hey, you. Quit getting in my way; I can't have sex properly if I'm afraid I'll squash you."

Rachel was laughing. "Jack! Say something nice."

He thought about it as she got up, then pulled him out of the bed and into the bathroom. "Well," he said as she turned the bath on, then got in, "I suppose you make Rachel curvier. I like that." He got in with Rachel, pulling her back against him and running his hands over her stomach and thighs. "Even if I can't touch her tits any more." He kissed Rachel's throat as the tub filled up. "You're making my life absolutely miserable, kid."

"Just like Mitzi makes you miserable every time you see her?" he was asked lightly.

"Even more." He reached out to toe the water off as Rachel lay her head on his shoulder and yawned. "We should tell the fag."

"Mm. We'll give him the ultrasound from today, so he can see that he's getting a niece or a nephew." She trailed her fingers in the water. "So . . . have you thought about names?"

Jack blinked. "Uh . . . names?"

"For the baby."

He was supposed to think up names? No one had told him _that_. "Not Batman?"

That made his wife laugh as he poked her stomach. "Batman isn't a name, Jack."

"Yeah, well."

Rachel sighed as she took his hand and held it to her cheek. "I want you to help name the baby, Jack. I don't want you to feel left out."

He shrugged and continued poking her stomach. "I don't care what you call it. Just . . . not Bruce."

She tensed a little. "Why not Bruce?"

"'Cause it rhymes with douche, that's why." Jack laughed as she groaned at his pun. "And the guy is, really."

"Fine, not Bruce. What if it's a girl? Any girl names we should stay away from?"

"None that I can think of. Come on, kid, kick!" And he poked her stomach again.

"Is _that_ what you're doing when you flick me?" Rachel asked. "Training the baby to kick?"

"Gotta train 'em when they're young, toots. Now, don't freak out, but are you supposed to be this big already?"

Rachel had gotten both of his hands and was rubbing them against her stomach; some bonding type crap, she'd told him before. "Do I look fat?"

"You look pregnant," he hastily reassured her. "And damned sexy. I might bend you over the counter and bang you again before we leave."

She giggled. "We'll ask Dr. Howard today . . ."

"Hey, hey, don't fall asleep." He washed her off and then stood them both up, enjoying the feel of her stomach pressing against him as she leaned into his embrace. It was different, wonderfully different, and he filed it desperately away in his memory. "We've got lots of things to do today. Gotta get to work, gotta see the baby . . . Do other, pregnant-type stuff . . ."

"Get wonderfully pampered by my loving husband?"

Jack grinned up at Rachel as he sat her on the bed and dried her off, taking his time. "Of course; what else am I good for?"

"Jalapeños at midnight?" she asked.

He rolled his eyes and got up to get her outfit for the day, folded neatly on the dresser. "I'm especially good at getting random food for you in the middle of the night. Arms up."

She obediently raised her arms so he could pull the maternity bra/camisole she'd bought over her head, then let her adjust it over her breasts, and rubbed her feet before sliding her panties up her legs. Rachel was beaming down at him as he carefully adjusted her socks, then placed her hands on his shoulders to steady herself when she stepped in to her new knee-length grey tweed skirt. A light brown babydoll top came next, short sleeved with dark brown satin trimming.

"Comfy?" Jack asked after he'd slipped her shoes on. She'd wanted a two-inch heel, but he hadn't let her get that pair, opting instead for a one-inch heel --- but only because she'd started tearing up when he'd vetoed the two-inch pair.

"Very," Rachel nodded.

"Hungry?"

She laughed as he picked her up to take her down the stairs. "Always."

"Well, what do we want for breakfast today?" Now Rachel pursed her lips unhappily and frowned, lightly scratching the back of his neck. It meant she thought she was about to hurt his feelings. Jack kissed her once they were in the kitchen. "Come on, moonshine, what do you want to eat?"

Rachel looked down at her stomach. "An . . . omelette." He hummed questioningly. She bit her lower lip. "From the deli."

Jack laughed as Rachel started to apologise, cutting her off with a kiss to her temple. "Baby, if I wanted people to always eat my cooking, I'd be a chef. It's all right, we'll go to the deli."

"Are you sure?" she asked with a slight whine.

Jack hugged her close and smiled into her beautiful green eyes. "Of course I'm sure." He'd dressed himself while dressing Rachel, and slid his sneakers on when they got to the front door. His keys were in his pocket, and he had Rachel's purse over his shoulder, which always made her laugh. "When's he getting hitched, again?"

"Who? Hideki? Next weekend." Rachel sighed and arched her back, rubbing the small of it.

"Are you okay?" Jack asked as he helped her down the steps.

"I'm fine. Just sore in general --- it's not your fault!" she exclaimed when he scowled. "Jack, it's not your fault."

"I _have_ a right hand for a _reason_, you know," he told her. Rachel sighed as he held the passenger door open. "You're not going to hurt my feelings if you tell me to use it."

"I don't want you to use it like that, Jack. I told you, I'll let you know if it starts to hurt."

It didn't make him feel better. "Yeah, well, don't think you need to let it get uncomfortable just to keep me happy, all right?" The slightly guilty look on her face told Jack that Rachel had kept quite about discomfort at least once. "I'm serious, Rachel. There's lots of ways for me to get off that don't involve being inside of you."

"I get it," she snapped, crossed her arms under her breasts. "You're just repeating yourself."

Jack forced himself to keep breathing easily. She was easily upset. He'd have to pay more attention in bed, was all. His headache started up again and he squinted a little as he fought it off. Not now. Not today. He needed to be himself today.

"Okay," he finally said. "I'm sorry. I'm just worried." He glanced at her as Loleta came into view, but she was looking out the window. She was asleep by the time he pulled in at the deli, and Jack smiled as he unbuckled, leaned over, and kissed her cheek while he rubbed her stomach. "Come on, sweet-tea, time to eat."

"Hm?" Rachel jerked awake and blinked at him, then smiled when he kissed her gently. "I'm sorry; I dozed off."

Which meant she wasn't upset with him any more, which made Jack a happy man. He got out and came around to her side, holding the door open. "It's all right. Oh, look who's here . . . What are you two delinquents doing out of school?" he demanded as Janet and Susie came out of the deli, holding hands.

Susie lit up and ran at Jack, squealing his name, and he picked her up and swung her around with a grin before settling her on his hip. "Jack! Mommy gave us money to come get food! What are you doing here?"

"Rachel wanted an omelette," he said as one hand reached out for Rachel's elbow, helping her out of the car. Susie placed her palms on his cheeks and pulled their foreheads together, very serious.

"What's wrong with your cooking, mister?" she demanded with what she must have thought was a fierce scowl.

"Nothing," he said as they all walked in to the deli. "Rachel just felt like having breakfast here today." He looked at Rachel and then at her stomach, raising an eyebrow.

She smiled as Susie let go of Janet's hand to take hers. "Let me get my food, then Jack and I have a secret to tell you."

"Really?!" Susie bounced up and down and sat so quickly that it almost fell over. "I wanna know!"

"It's a secret, sweety," Jack said as Rachel went up to order, pulling Susie into his lap. This was what the baby might look like in five years. He hoped he'd be there to see it this big. "So you can't tell anybody, all right? I'll throw you off the dock if you do." He looked up at Janet, who flushed and looked away quickly. "How's everything going for you girls?" He'd avoided mentioning Mary in particular because Janet was still convinced he'd had sex with the woman.

She looked a little suspicious, but shrugged. "Good. Mom's not drinking as much."

Jack nodded as Rachel came back and sat down, holding a tray with the girls' breakfasts on it. "Here, eat this before I do." She rested one hand on her bump as she entwined her other with Jack's hand. "Do you want to tell them, Jack?"

He raised her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles, then laughed when Susie took his hand and mimicked him. "Thanks, kid. If you're okay with it," he told Rachel.

"Can't keep it a secret much longer," she shrugged.

"What?" Susie demanded. "What's going on? I wanna know!"

Rachel pushed her chair out a little and turned to the side, holding her hands out. "Come here, Susie." The little girl got down and went to her, and Rachel put her hands on her swollen stomach. Susie's eyes widened. "I'm going to have a baby, Susie."

Janet started choking on her food and Susie's eyes bugged out before she snatched her hands back and shook her head frantically. "No!" she cried out.

Rachel blinked and looked at Jack uncertainly. He shrugged, equally puzzled. "What's wrong, Susie?"

"You can't have a baby!" the little girl cried. "I don't want you to have a baby!"

"Susie, quiet," Janet shushed as she stared at Jack and Rachel. "How long have you been pregnant?" she asked in disbelief.

"I'll be thirteen weeks along tomorrow," Rachel replied, then turned back to the crying child in front of her. "Susie, why don't you want us to have a baby?"

"B, because then, then you won't want me any more!" Susie wailed, turning to Jack and burying her face in his lap. "Y, you'll l-love the b-baby more!"

"Hey," Jack said firmly as he lifted her into his lap and hugged her, "who said that?"

"If you're a daddy to the baby," Susie whimpered, "you can't be _my _Daddy!"

He'd thought she was over that. Jack sighed. "I _can't_ be your Daddy," he told her. "You've got your mom, remember? I'd have to marry your mom to be your Daddy, and I've got Rachel already."

Susie burst into fresh tears. "That's why you can't have a baby!"

Rachel looked like _she_ was about to cry, too. "Honey, we can't help it. You can still come over, Susie. Look, the baby's already growing, see?" She patted her stomach, but Susie was crying into Jack's shoulder.

Jack sighed and tugged at Susie's pigtails until she looked up at him. "Shut up," he told her firmly. "You know what, Susie? I don't know how to be a Daddy. I need you to help me with the baby."

"You don't?" she asked with a sniffle.

Jack snorted and shook his head. "Hell no, I don't have _any_ idea how to take care of a baby. That's why I need you and Janet to come over when it's born and help me out, see? Now, look at Rachel. See how pretty she is?" Susie nodded as he turned her in his lap. "See her stomach?" Another nod. "Now, that's the baby in there. It's the size of a peach right now."

"A peach?" the child asked in amazement.

"A peach," Jack confirmed. "And it can hear you, too, so you better be nice to it."

"Is it a boy or a girl?" Janet broke in, excitement in her voice.

"We won't know for a few more weeks, but we'll tell you as soon as we do," Rachel told her. Now that the outburst was over, the girl who worked there brought Rachel's food over. She set a plate in front of him, which meant that Rachel had remembered to order him food, too. "Thank you. We can bring the ultrasound to dance class tomorrow."

"What's an altro-sound?" Susie asked as she kept staring at Rachel's belly.

"Ultrasound," Rachel corrected. "It's a picture of the baby. Eat your food, Susie."

She tucked in to her own food, letting Jack answer all the questions the girls had. No, they didn't have names picked out (what was it with names?!), it should be born in January, the Fines and Dr. Howard were the only other people in town who knew . . . Jack was relieved to point out that they were late to school, then held his head in one hand as they ran out.

"Are you okay?" Rachel asked.

"Just a headache; it's nothing," he whispered, reaching out to find her free hand and squeeze it. Then he shook his head sharply. "I'll walk you to work." He held her hand as they left the deli, walking slowly so she wouldn't get too short of breath. "You telling Bowen today?"

She nodded. "I think he suspects something, but I'll tell him when I get in." Jack slid his arm around her waist and they were quiet until they got to he law firm's building. He held the door open for her and Rachel stood on her toes for a kiss. "Are you staying in town?"

He stroked her hair, then cupped her cheek. "For a bit; I need to do some things at home. I'll be back for the appointment, though."

He doubted she even realised she'd been tense as she relaxed, then smiled at him. "Are you okay?"

Jack nodded. "Yeah. Can't wait to know what it is." He pressed his palm against her stomach as he kissed her again. "You two take it easy, okay?"

Rachel kissed his nose. "We will."

Jack stayed where he was, still smiling, until Rachel shut the door behind her. The soft smile stayed on his lips as he walked to the car, but it was fading from his eyes, leaving them cold and hard.

He wasn't smiling at all when he left town.


	14. Chapter 14

"So, how are we today?" Dr. Howard asked as Rachel settled back on the examination table.

"Hating ultrasounds. Isn't there a better process? One that doesn't involve my bladder?"

He laughed as Jack held Rachel's cool hand against his temple. He'd been fighting off his headache since he'd left town, finally breaking down at home and taking some aspirin for it. He didn't need it right now, he told himself calmly. He needed to be here with Rachel right now. He looked up when she took a quick breath, but the doctor was only spreading the scan gel over her stomach.

"Okay?" he murmured.

Rachel nodded. "It's just cold."

"Hey, warm it up next time, huh?" Jack said, but Rachel just squeezed his hand.

"I'll do that," Howard replied absently. "How are you feeling, Rachel?"

"Better than last time," she replied. "Not as nauseous, but I still get tired easily. We told my mother, and I just told Mark."

"Any plans for this weekend?"

Jack rolled his eyes and sat back, watching Howard watch the screen and take notes without bothering to explain what he was doing. "Just the Fourth of July festival; Jack's class is performing in it and they've been working hard. Oh, some friends of ours are getting married next weekend in Gotham; it'll be all right to drive there, won't it?"

"I don't see why not, unless something comes up today."

"There's still one kid in there, right?" Jack asked abruptly.

Howard turned to him with raised eyebrows, pointing at the screen and the baby it showed. "Like that one?"

Jack glared at him. "I mean, there's only one. Not two."

"Well, at Rachel's age the possibility of a multiple birth is much higher than for a younger woman, especially if there's a history of fraternal twins in either family."

"Not in mine, and Jack doesn't know," Rachel told him.

"I was a quadruplet, but I ate them all in the womb."

That made her laugh as Dr. Howard shook his head. "As far as I can tell, there's just one. It could be gas, or your uterus could have grown a bit."

"Is it a boy or a girl?"

"Too early to tell; you'll have another ultrasound at twenty weeks, and we ought to be able to tell then."

"I told you," Rachel murmured with a smile.

Jack rolled his eyes as he deflated a bit. "Well, I'd hoped . . ."

"If it makes you feel any better," Dr. Howard put in, "the baby's gender has been established by now."

"It could be a hermaphrodite for all I care," Jack grouched. "I just want to _know_."

Rachel patted his hand. "Why don't you make me two lists, Jack, one of boy names and one of girl names. Pick the ones that you like best, and then I'll pick the ones that _I_ like best."

"Quit trying to make me feel involved," he told her as he kissed her nose. Then he turned and flicked her stomach. "Kick!" On the screen, the tiny baby turned a somersault and Jack jumped back a little with wide eyes. "Holy crap! Did you see that?!" His face lit up as Rachel groaned, and he leaned down to flick her stomach again. "Kick!" This time the baby flung a leg out and Jack cackled.

"Stop it!" Rachel said as she grabbed his wrist when he tried to flick her again. "That kind of hurts, you know."

He settled down as Dr. Howard laughed. "Any foetus is going to react to being poked, Jack. It's nothing special."

"Way to cut a guy down," Jack grumbled, but he was still smirking as he caressed the side of Rachel's stomach. "Could you feel it moving?"

Rachel laughed as she shook her head. "No, sorry."

"When you start feeling the baby move," Dr. Howard commented as he jotted more notes down, "it will probably feel like when you're in a pool and someone passes you in the water and the waves bounce off of you, except in your lower abdomen."

"Hey, hey, hey, what are you writing down there?" Jack demanded suspiciously.

"Just taking notes, Mr. Dawes," Dr. Howard murmured, never once looking at the suddenly agitated father. "Every thing's fine. I just need to write it down. I'd tell you if something wasn't right."

"No, you'd tell _Rachel_, because I'd freak out too much," Jack replied.

The doctor finally looked up at him over his glasses and smiled. "Well, yes. I'd tell Rachel. But every thing's just fine, and here, listen to this."

A fast swooshing noise filled the room and Jack cocked his head to the side as he listened, his mouth pulling into a frown. Then, "Is that an underwater choo-choo train?" Dr. Howard and Rachel, whose eyes had gotten big and mouth had opened into a tiny 'o', both started laughing. "What?" Jack asked. "What?"

"That's the heart beat," Howard explained as Rachel smiled up at him.

Jack's own eyes got big and he held his free hand up. "Wait. Be quiet. I need to remember this." He stared at the moving baby on the ultrasound screen as he listened intently, then knelt slowly and pressed his ear to Rachel's belly, closing his eyes as he concentrated. He felt Rachel's fingers tiptoe through his curls after a while and grabbed on to that sensation, too, committing every thing to memory. He needed to be able to recall this moment no matter what happened. This baby . . . was his baby. This was Jack Dawes' baby. This was a little Jack, or a little Rachel; a tiny playmate for the Mitzi-thing. Something he'd die --- or kill --- to protect. His baby. His. Jack's. No one else's.

"Are you asleep?" Rachel whispered.

Jack opened his eyes and stood up, squeezing her hand with a smile. "No. Just thinking."

"Of what?"

He thought fast. "How miserable I'm going to make it in about fifteen years if it's a girl." He grinned at her as Rachel rolled her eyes. "Sure, sweety, bring this Tommy boy in so I can meet him. So you're Tommy, huh? I wanna show you this great magic trick. Wanna see this pencil disappear? It will. Into your head. If my daughter's not back by ten. Nine-thirty, to be safe."

Rachel groaned as Dr. Howard wiped the gel off of her stomach, then Jack helped her sit up. "Well, I've got fifteen years and a fifty-fifty chance besides, before that happens. I can get used to the idea of you hiding out with a knife in the living room until she gets home. I think."

"I can shoot a gun as well as I can use knives; I'm not particular. I dunno . . ."

She pulled her top over her stomach and pinched his side before Jack could start seriously weighing the pros and cons of knives versus guns as a means to terrify potential boyfriends of their potential daughter. Jack's hand was warm on the small of her back as she said goodbye to the doctor, and he stayed glued to her side until they'd arrived back at her office.

"So, uh . . . anyone in there today?" he asked with a slow lick of his lips.

Rachel shook her finger in his face. "Jack, we're not having sex in my office."

He grabbed her wrist and kissed her palm, his other hand running along her hips and abdomen. "Really? Can I call you when I get home, then?"

"_No_. I actually have things to do today."

"Argh, you get work _done_ without Hideki to gossip with, I forgot." Jack took both of Rachel's hands and kissed her knuckles, still smiling.

She shook her head with a return smile and then ran her hands down his chest, smoothing his shirt. "Will you make that list of names?" she asked as she looked up at him through her lashes.

Jack was a sucker for that look. He covered her hands with his, holding them flat against his chest as he nodded. "I promise, I'll work on it when I get home." Amongst other things.

Rachel beamed up at him and he got a real kiss, delicate tongue and all, for his efforts. Jack hummed with pleasure before pulling back, his fingers curled in the hair at the base of Rachel's neck. He looked her face over for a long time, making sure he had the planes and curves memorised, loving the feel of her body pressed against his and her on hands on his shoulders.

"You're not coming in with me, so quit giving me that look," Rachel finally murmured.

"I'll come in if I want to," Jack told her as he let her go. "You're not the boss of me, no matter what Susie says."

"I'll be sure to tell her that. Will you stop at the store and get another watermelon, please? I, uh . . . I sort of ate the one we had."

Jack laughed and hugged Rachel. "No problem, cupcake. How about I get two, just in case?" She thanked him and then Jack sent her inside with threats of kinky phone calls.

***

Jack had stripped down to his white wife-beater, which was already clinging to his sweaty torso. He'd figured that the younger kids would be the ones to give him trouble, but it turned out that the older group was having the most difficulty. He'd separated the class into two groups, a twelve to seventeen group that was learning to quickstep, and a three to eight group that was doing a simple, almost hip-hop routine. The whole class had voted for that particular combination: the younger kids liked to bounce, and the older kids liked to be able to get really close to each other. They were also eager to be out and about with their friends before they had to be on the amphitheatre stage at the high school to do their performances.

"Cathy, the quickstep does _not_ requite that much genital-to-genital contact, do you understand me?" He glared at her in the mirror before turning back to Haley and Joseph. "One more time, then you can all go." He backed up and then sat next to Rachel, who ignored him in favour of the carton of raspberry sorbet she'd smuggled in. It wasn't as if he would have told her to eat it outside, but she'd made a big show of being sneaky about it, so Jack hadn't bothered to comment on it. Let her think she was clever. "I get cotton candy for this," he muttered as the students took their places and he restarted the CD player.

"Which kind?" Rachel asked innocently.

Jack turned and stared at her, but she just blinked coyly at him as one newly-manicured hand rubbed her upper thigh gently. She could have just had an itch, but then . . . Jack swallowed as his mouth started watering. Damn woman knew him too well. "Both," he finally settled on.

"Happy Fourth of July to you, too, sweety," was all she said as she turned back to her sorbet.

"Were you talking to me or the food?"

"Both," she replied with a smile.

Jack leaned his head down to kiss her neck, one hand straying to her stomach and rubbing. Rachel sighed with pleasure and arched her neck, but it didn't distract her from her treat. Jack hadn't meant it to. He took a deep breath of her hair and laughed softly when it made her twitch. She placed her finger on his cheek and turned his attention back to the class and Jack lay his head on her shoulder. He yawned when the song finished and nodded.

"All right, amphitheatre at five-fifteen, all right? If you're late I'll skin you alive and feed you to Rory."

Susie came over and climbed into his lap, having forgiven him for fathering a child. "Did you bring the altru-sound?" she asked.

"Ultrasound," he corrected her, "and yes. Who wants to see my kid?" he asked as the students were changing into their regular shoes.

"What kid?" Tommy asked.

"The one I'm going to have. Here, see? This one." He took the ultrasound out of Rachel's purse and waved it at the class, who immediately flocked over to see. The girls squealed and giggled with excitement and the boys pretended to be disgusted and not interested in the slightest. Jack just basked in their attention, one arm around Rachel's shoulder. He had to swat a few hands away when the girls decided they wanted to touch Rachel's stomach, though. "Hey, what gives, huh? Who gave you permission to touch Rachel? I don't go around randomly touching _you_, you know."

"Not for lack of them _wanting_ you to," Rachel murmured. "You can't feel the baby yet, anyway," she said in a louder voice. "When you can feel it moving, I'll let you touch me, okay?"

"So back off and get out," Jack ordered them all. They almost ran out the door, all except Susie, who was resting her head on Jack's shoulder. "I meant you, too, kid," he told her.

"But Janet's with Hayden and won't let me come with them," she told him, shifting a bit so she was facing Rachel. Jack sighed. "Can I come with you and Miss Rachel, please?"

"Get used to this, Jack," Rachel laughed as she tweaked his nose, then Susie's. The girl giggled while Jack scowled.

"Where's your mom?"

"Helping Mrs. Johnson. She told me to stay with you or Janet."

Well, at least that meant Mary wasn't _too_ drunk, if she was with Veronica. Or it could mean the exact opposite. It depended on Veronica's mood. Jack slid one arm under Susie's knees and stood up. "I know which cotton candy I'm getting first, I guess. Okay, fine. Let's go."

"I want the blue kind!"

It took Rachel's quiet laughter for Jack to understand what Susie was talking about, versus what he'd implied, and his lips twitched. "I like the purple kind," he told the little girl in his arms. Rachel slid her hand into his back pocket and he grinned as he locked the dance studio. "Let's see if we can find Tom and Helna. I may as well babysit everyone's kid today, right?"

"Right!" Susie agreed. Jack moved her to his shoulders and she laughed. "I'm taller than you now, Jack!"

"You are," he agreed absently, arm around Rachel's shoulders. "Now you're freakishly tall, instead of freakishly small."

"You rhymed!" Susie repeated him, turning the sentence into a chant that lasted until they came upon Tom and Helna at a craft booth along the main street. The Fourth of July celebration included a craft faire, vendors, and car show. Which, come to think of it, was what most of Loleta's celebrations consisted of.

"Jack, Rachel! How are you?" Helna asked with a smile for them both and a hug for Rachel. "You've gotten so much bigger!"

"I'm here for your kid," Jack told them as he reached out for the Mitzi-thing. "Hand it over."

Tom laughed. "You've got one on the way, and someone else's kid, to boot. You don't half-ass things, do you?"

Jack scowled as the Mitzi-thing eagerly reached out for him. "Just shut up and hand the kid over, all right?"

"Fine, here, take her. Keep her for an hour?" Tom asked hopefully as he held the creature just out of reach.

"Why do I want your kid for an hour? What's wrong with half an hour?"

Tom looked at his blushing wife and then back at Jack. "Blunt honesty works best on you, Jack, so here it is: I haven't had sex in a week. Take Mitzi for at least an hour or I'll ticket you for every single time I saw you driving without a license, _and _for the graffiti on the overpass out of town."

"I had nothing to do with that!" Jack said indignantly.

"I know. I'll do it anyway. At least an hour, right?"

Jack sighed as he took the Mitzi-thing and gave it his finger to suck on. "Fine. One hour."

"At least," Tom said warningly as he took Helna's hand.

"Call when you want it back; I might have fed it to Rory by then." Jack looked up at Susie, then down at the girl-thing and snorted as it's parents almost ran to their car. "Ugly, ugly, ugly," he chanted. The thing burbled at him, then giggled and continued making noises. "Ja-ack. Say Jack. No, wait, say 'Jack is awesome and so much better than my old man.' Come on, say it."

"That was sweet of you," Rachel said as she took his free hand.

Jack shrugged. "Are you braiding my hair again?" he asked the girl on his shoulders.

"I'm making you pretty," Susie replied. That meant that she was, indeed, making an awful mess of his hair. "Are you going to cut it? You look like a girl with long hair."

Jack laughed, the Mitzi-thing giggling in one arm, Rachel laughing on his other, and Susie balanced on his shoulders. "I'll cut it when I get irritated with it. Why? You need some hair?"

"No!" Susie shrieked with laughter. "Hey! I want a bear!" She was pointing to the stretch of game booths, tugging excitedly at Jack's newly-styled hair. "Please, Jack? Win me a bear?"

"I want one, too," Rachel said as she hugged his arm.

Jack sighed as they stopped at the rifle booth, eyeballing the prizes. "Ugh, fine. What do _I _get if I win something?"

"Cotton candy," was Rachel's impish reply.

"You drive a hard bargain. Hold this ugly thing." He handed her the Mitzi-thing, then lifted Susie back to the ground and watched a man have a go at the game for a while. Satisfied that he knew how to beat it, Jack forked over the four dollars he was being conned out of. "Which thing do you want?"

"The big pink one!" Susie declared as she jumped up and down.

"The purple one," was Rachel's choice.

"Picky, picky, picky," Jack muttered as he brought the rifle up and rested the butt in the hollow of his shoulder. He liked the feel of the gun in his hands. Pressure built expectantly at his temples and the moment was savoured, then he popped off five quick rounds. Five different balloons exploded and Jack set the rifle down, grinning at the open-mouthed man in the corner. "I think the ladies will take their prizes," he said smugly.

"Uh . . . yeah, sure, mister," the man mumbled as he got the toys down in a daze. He was shaking with fear and Jack just grinned and grinned and grinned. That had felt so damned _good_. "Uh . . . anything else for ya today?"

"No, I'm good. Thanks, friend." Rachel's hand on his arm brought him back and Jack shook the pressure away, then scrunched his nose at her. "Happy?"

She hugged her new bear against her tightly and nodded. "Thank you."

"Yeah, sure. What about you, kid?" he asked as he dropped his hand to Susie's head and ruffled her hair. "Like it?"

"It's huge!" she squeaked from behind the pink monstrosity. It was bigger than she was, and Jack laughed.

"It's because you're a midget," he told her. "Midget queen!"

"Pumpkin king!"

"Squeaky clean!"

"Jelly bean!"

Rachel laughed as the two rhymed back and forth, their hands linked together. Jack was swinging her hand, too, and Mitzi was cooing on her other hip. When they ran into Janet and the boy she was with, Jack wouldn't stop yammering until she bought him and Susie cotton candy, then claimed that since his hands were full --- raising Susie and Rachel's arms to show her --- Janet had to feed him the whipped sugar. Janet wasted no time in ditching the boy, gladly feeding Jack as she blushed.

***

"You smell like fireworks," Rachel murmured as she and Jack lay back on their blanket on the football field, watching the fireworks show with the rest of the town. Jack just chuckled to himself; he'd been lighting small fireworks off with some of the high school boys after his class had finished their routines. Rachel suspected that a few of the bursts had been a little modified, but she wasn't about to call him on it. Let him think he was clever.

"Best is yet to come," he said with a grin at Tom, who was stretched out next to him with Helna's head on his stomach. Both very satisfied parents had finally found them as Jack had been laying the blanket out, and had added their own. It had been a good thing, too, because in addition to the four adults and one baby, Janet and Susie had also piled onto the blankets, bickering about who got what glow-stick until Jack had growled low in his throat.

He'd been right; the finale was amazing and Rachel stared at the brilliant display of fireworks for a long time until her brain registered the smaller explosions. Then she turned to her husband just as he was high-fiving Tom.

"Jack . . . was that the old library?"

The man froze and Tom started laughing, then Jack turned a very pleased grin on her. "I told you they wanted my help with it," he said. "I figured, why not go out in a blaze of glory?"

Rachel laughed. "I love you, Jack. You're such a boy, sometimes."

"Oh, I think I'll have to prove otherwise tonight. You know what explosions do to me."

"What do they do to you?" Susie asked suddenly.

Jack almost jumped out of his skin; he hadn't thought she was paying attention. "They make me . . . uhm . . . want to blow more stuff up," he said without conviction.

"Like what?"

"Little girls! Rawr!" He jerked toward her and Susie squealed, hiding behind Janet. "Kaboom!" He got up and chased her around until he got bored, then flopped back down next to Rachel. "Ready to head home?" He helped her up, then caught her as someone bumped into her. "Hey! Watch it!" he shouted after them. The short woman didn't bother turning around. "Bitch," Jack muttered. "You okay?"

Rachel nodded as she rubbed her lower back. "I'm fine. Let's get the girls back to Mary, then we'll go home."

Jack was staring after the woman who'd bumped into Rachel and nodded. "Yeah. Sure."


	15. Chapter 15

"Bruce!" Rachel was bouncing up and down as she waved to the man, who was smiling as he got out of his plane and walked over to them.

He was still smiling as he pulled his fist back and socked Jack in the mouth.

"Bruce!" Rachel shrieked as Jack went sprawling back on the runway pavement. She tried to grab Bruce's arm but he evaded her easily, grabbing Jack by his collar as Jack burst into cackles.

"Holy shit, Wayne! You still sore about me getting your girl?" Bruce got a fist in the stomach and grunted, then jerked his elbow into Jack's chin.

"Stop it!" Rachel yelled, stamping her foot. "Both of you, knock it off!"

"You think this was a good idea?" Bruce hissed as he hauled Jack up by the collar again. "What the _hell_ were you doing, putting Rachel in this much danger?!"

Jack spit a bit of blood onto Bruce's Armani suit and clawed at his wrists. "Wasn't my fault," he choked out as his feet scrambled for purchase on the ground. "Didn't want a kid 'till this was over."

"You should have been more careful!" Bruce bellowed as he threw Jack down again. Jack rolled into a crouch and lunged at Bruce, catching him by the waist and knocking him down, too.

"Alfred, do something!" Rachel demanded as she turned to the man. "They're going to kill each other!"

"Oh, I highly doubt _that_," her friend replied. He watched the two men grapple with a resigned sort of amusement. "Master Bruce just has some tension to work out."

"But ---!"

Jack had gotten on Bruce's back, his arm around the other man's throat. He squeezed as hard as he could. "Look, B," he snarled, "you gonna cooperate or not? 'Cause I can do this on my own, but I'd _really_ rather _not_. And as much as you'd just _love_ to marry _my_ wife and raise _my_ kid, it's never gonna happen. So what's it gonna be, Brucey?"

"Piss off," Bruce choked out. He'd stopped struggling and was concentrating on just being able to breathe. Jack's arm on his windpipe tightened again and he gagged. "Get off," he croaked.

Jack just loosened his grip. "Is this you cooperating?"

"I'm not doing it for you," Bruce panted. "I'm doing it for Rachel."

"Good enough for me!" Jack declared as he let the man go and stood up. He backed away quickly while he smoothed his rumpled shirt and dishevelled hair. Turning to Rachel, he tilted his head to the side and beamed at her. "That was fun!" He reached for her but got a slap across the face. "That wasn't." His head almost exploded with pain and he rubbed his temples for a moment as Rachel yelled at him. His only real consolation was that Wayne got _his _ass chewed off and handed back to him, too.

After Rachel had gotten both men to apologise for their immature, rude, childish behaviour, Alfred politely reminded them of the time and herded them on to the plane. Rachel slumped in her seat and glared at Jack when he took her heels off and put her feet in his lap to rub them.

"That's not going to make me not mad at you."

"I didn't start it," he said, watching her relax. "Wayne hit me first. I just defended myself."

"Laughing while you did it; right."

"Well, I haven't been in a real fight in a while." He shrugged. "I keep telling you I'm a violent guy, but you never believe me."

Rachel sighed as Alfred set a tray of drinks next to a tray of band-aids and damp towels, sitting up to take a towel and dab at Jack's bruised face. He flinched, but she glared at him until he settled down.

"You're both grown men," she scolded gently. Jack's scars twitched as he tried to not smile. "You should be over this stupid rivalry of yours by now."

"It's never going to end," Jack murmured. He tilted his cheek to rub his scars against her palm and _did_ smile as Rachel's eyes softened. "I just love Bruce too much to leave him alone. Besides, he can't have you. I won."

She rolled her eyes. "I'm not a prize, Jack."

"You're the only thing worth anything," he whispered, looking at her with those big brown eyes of his.

Rachel sighed and pulled him into a hug, running her fingers through his hair and along his scalp. "Isn't the baby worth something?" she asked him gently.

Jack looked over her shoulder at Bruce, his head pounding and his face pained as he put his hand on Rachel's stomach. "Of course," he assured her after a moment. "This kid's only slightly less special to me than you are." He held her tightly for a moment longer, then pushed her back gently. "Wanna see the latest ultrasound, Wayne?"

Bruce sighed and lowered his gaze to the table between the seats, then back up. "Love to. You're how far along?"

Rachel was smiling as she dug in her purse. "Fourteen weeks tomorrow, but this is last week's ultrasound. The next one will be about twenty weeks; Jack was bummed that we're not getting one every week." She handed Bruce the ultrasound and leaned forward to show him what was what. "Tomorrow starts the second trimester. See? There's the head . . . it wasn't cooperating very well, I'm afraid."

"Takes after Jack like that, huh?"

"Knock it off; I can be just as stubborn." Bruce was examining the picture with pursed lips and Rachel sighed. "What's wrong, Bruce? The baby's perfectly fine, and so am I."

"Mm?" He looked up and shook his head a little, then smiled. "No, I'm happy for you, Rachel, I am. I'm just . . . I don't like to think of you way up in the middle of nowhere with those murders going on."

"Christ, why is everyone so worried?" Rachel asked as she sat back. "The murders have stopped, anyway." She covered her mouth and turned her face into Jack's shoulder as the plane finally took off.

"Don't you dare puke all over me," Jack told her even as he squeezed her shoulders and offered her a sip of water. "Puke on Bruce."

"I'm fine," she whispered after a moment as the dizzy nausea passed. "I'm so glad you're concerned for me."

"I am," Jack said. He rubbed at his scars. "I just don't want you puking on me." He kissed her temple and she lay her head on his shoulder. "See? That's my girl."

Bruce blinked once and leaned forward. "Rachel, you can't deny that these murders have something to do with you and Jack." She groaned and closed her eyes. "We don't know that the murderer has stopped for good, and I don't think you're safe in Loleta. Besides, you can get much better care in Gotham City."

"Gotham City is one of the most polluted cities in the United States, Bruce. I am _not_ having my baby there. We'll be just fine in Loleta; Hideki and Raoul have threatened to move in if the murders start again, anyway." She patted Jack's hand and smiled at both men. "Besides, they have a couple of suspects in custody." Jack's head twitched a little and Bruce frowned, but they let the subject drop.

"So . . . have you thought about names yet?"

"Again with the _names_!" Jack muttered as he rolled his eyes. "I'm making a couple of lists, one for a girl and one for a boy; I don't know why _I_ have to do it, either. I don't care what we call it." He rubbed his eyes, glad that Rachel had nodded off. "She thinks I'll feel left out if I don't name the kid."

"Will you?" Wayne asked with a slight smile.

"Not at all. I made it, I get to see it getting bigger . . . as long as they're both safe and it's not named Bruce, I'm good."

One eyebrow went up. "Why not Bruce?"

"Because it rhymes with douche," Jack said with a grin. When Rachel didn't even twitch, he lowered his voice. "But really, you're good with this, right? I'll send her off to you as soon as I can, but she's kind of stubborn and I really can't chance that she'll find out ---"

"I've got your back," Bruce assured him. "Are y_ou_ good with this, though? Hideki was really upset when he gave me your letter, and everything else."

"What else can I do?" Jack asked. "This isn't going to stop until I give them what they want." He pursed his lips and tongued his scars. "I like being here," he murmured, looking down at Rachel. He placed his hand on her stomach. "I can't lose either of them. I don't know what will happen after I leave, but . . . I need a reason to come back. They're my reasons."

"I think you're crazy for trying this," Bruce said after a moment, "but I have to agree with you. I'll be there whenever you need me."

Jack looked up. "Thank you."

***

Hideki and Raoul were waiting for them at the airstrip. "Rachel! I'm getting married today!"

Rachel laughed as Bruce and Jack helped her to the ground. "Hideki! I'm knocked up!"

He shrieked and hugged her tightly, kneeling down to press his hands to her stomach. "Holy crap! You're freaking _huge_!"

"Beautiful!" Jack interrupted as Rachel's eyes widened. "Gorgeous! I swear, you've never looked better, Rachel." He kicked at Hideki as subtly as he could, hoping the man got the hint.

"How far along are you?! Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"Fourteen weeks tomorrow, and I wanted it to be a surprise, plus I wanted to wait until . . ."

"Until what?" Jack asked suspiciously as she trailed off.

Rachel shrugged. "It's all right, Jack."

He stopped her and turned her to face him, frowning down at her. "No, until what?"

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, her hands raising to his cheeks. "The risk of a miscarriage goes down a lot after the first trimester," she murmured. Jack went just a little cold. He'd known that; he'd read about it. He just hadn't . . . connected it with Rachel. He licked his lips and swallowed as she went on soothingly. "It's also higher then older you are, but I'm just fine, Jack, me and the baby are just fine." She covered his hands with hers when he placed them on her stomach, not quite able to talk yet. Rachel smiled softly at him. He loved her so much. "I'm taking good care of myself --- _you're_ taking good care of me. There shouldn't be any problems."

"I want you to see a doctor here," Jack managed to croak out. His face felt stiff and his heart was racing as his stomach clenched.

She shook her head. "Jack ---"

"Wayne, I want her to see a doctor as soon as possible." Jack pulled Rachel against him and held her there as gently as he could.

"I'm fine," Rachel whispered.

"You were still taking your pills after you conceived, and I put you under a lot of stress, too," he murmured. "Doc Howard's a great guy, but I'm not risking you or the baby."

"So, what, you're going to con Bruce into flying me down to Gotham for every appointment?" Rachel was still holding on to him, though, because _she_ was afraid of losing the baby, too. Jack didn't need to know that they still weren't quite out of the danger zone yet. He was trembling slightly as it was, and she ran her hands up and down his back and through his hair. "I love you, Jack."

"I'm a lovable guy," he responded. "You're still seeing a doctor while we're here."

"And who's going to pay for it, hmm?"

"Wayne is, of course, because he loves you, too." Jack looked up at the man. "Isn't that right, B?"

"Can't argue with _that_," Bruce said with a shrug. "Alfred, give Charles a call and see if she'll give ---"

"You'll call her yourself, Master Bruce," Alfred interrupted as he loaded Jack and Rachel's bags in the limo, "and you'll leave me out of the whole thing."

Hideki was laughing at the look on Bruce's face as the five of them got in. "Trouble in paradise," he explained.

"Yes, well, we're headed straight to dinner ---"

"Don't worry, I made sure I invited Charles," Raoul said. Bruce's lips pursed slightly.

"I need to change," Rachel said while Jack rubbed her shoulders. "I can't go out like this." Her current outfit was fine for the daytime, but not an evening at one of Bruce's restaurants.

Bruce turned and rolled down the window separating Alfred and the driver from the back. "Al --- where are we headed?" he demanded.

"To pick up Ms. Rivard, Master Bruce. Rachel can change there."

"Why is everyone against me?" Bruce asked as he closed the window in disgust.

"Because it's fun," Jack replied. He was engrossed in Rachel's massage when Bruce glared at him, not paying any more attention to the man.

"I have to use the restroom, too," Rachel said.

"Again?"

Now Rachel glared at Bruce, but only for a moment as Jack paused. When he went back to rubbing her shoulders and back, her eyes fluttered closed again. "Yes, again," she murmured. "The baby's sitting right on my bladder."

"Give her a break, Wayne, or I'll tell Charles."

"Don't you dare threaten me with that woman, Jack."

"Shut up, both of you," Rachel snapped suddenly. "I'm sick and tired of you fighting like children. Grow up. And don't think I'll forgive you just because you love up on me," she said when Jack nuzzled her neck. She pushed him away and scooted closer to Hideki. "_This_ guy acts more mature than you two."

"And that's saying a lot," her friend agreed. He leaned out the window as the limo pulled to a stop in front of Charles' house. "Hey, Chuck! Rachel's knocked up!"

"I know," the former Marine called from the porch.

"How do _you_ know?"

"Where do you think Jack got the explosives he needed to demolish that library?"

"You're fucking omniscient, Charles!"

"Better not be," Bruce grumbled.

"Tell that pansy fop to get his ass out here!"

Hideki pulled his head back in. "Pansy fop, get your ass out there."

Bruce sighed heavily and glowered at Alfred when the man opened the door, then turned to help Rachel out. She could tell by the look on his face that he wanted to close the door on Jack, but he took his hand away after a sidelong glance at Charles. She was in black cargo pants and a blank tank top, her combat boot-covered feet propped up on the porch railing as she watched them.

"What, no clown car today?"

"Left it in Loleta," Jack said as she stood up to hug Rachel.

"I was talking about the fop and his anorexic fan club."

"Oh. Well."

"Rachel, you look beautiful," Charles said warmly. She held her hand over Rachel's stomach and raised her eyebrows.

"Go ahead."

"Oh . . . you're so big already." It appeared that even tough-as-nails former Marines weren't immune to potential babies. Charles was grinning. "You're keeping good care of yourself, right?"

"Whether I like it or not. It's mostly fat; Jack makes me eat at least twice as much as I normally would." Now Rachel laughed as she was led inside the small house. "I think it's to hide the fact that _he's_ gained weight."

"Sympathy weight, huh?" Jack rolled his eyes and pulled out a dress from her bags, shooing Rachel into Charles' bedroom. "You must be proud."

"Of what?" he asked. Charles arched an eyebrow at him. "Oh. That. Yeah. Uhm, sure." He shrugged quickly. "I mean, it's mine. I made it." Then he scratched at his scars. "As long as she stops yelling at me for breathing wrong." He shoved his hands in his pockets and toed at the floor as Charles just pursed her lips. "Yeah, fine, I'm proud. We made a baby, hooray. I want her to see a doctor this weekend. Think you can pull that off?"

"Of course I can," she replied as she kicked Bruce's feet off of her coffee table. He winced. "I'll call Marconi, see if he's free." She picked up her cell phone and dialled, disappearing into her bedroom after a quick knock. "Hey, Marconi, I need you in Gotham . . ."

"You're going to dinner in _that_?" Bruce asked.

Jack looked down at his green t-shirt and jeans. "Guess I should dress up a bit."

"Guess so." Alfred handed him slacks and a button-down shirt, and Bruce followed him to the second room in the house, which had been set up as an office. "Did you ever consider surgery, Jack?"

"For what?" he asked as he stripped.

"And you have no shame whatsoever," Bruce grumbled. "For the scars."

"None at all. Never had the money, for one. Well, maybe when Harleen was alive, but _I _certainly never saw any of it. People knew I was her pet Joker with the scars; they distinguished me from everyone else. So she never brought it up, and I never really thought about it. Then Rachel came along and told me she _liked_ them, so I never considered it then, either." He shrugged. "Plus I just don't care, you know? Well, maybe a little, before Rachel told me she likes them . . . but you know what? That's the only time I ever remember actually caring what someone thought of how I looked." He started buttoning the shirt. "It was the first time I ever _wanted_ someone to not be afraid of them, too. First time I wanted someone to like me for me."

His voice had gotten softer and then Bruce's hand was on his shoulder. "We'll get you back, Jack. Don't worry."

His lips twitched into a half-smile. "Thanks, B."

"No problem. Change your damned shoes."

"What are you, my fucking mother?" Jack threw his sneakers at Bruce, who ducked out of the room. A vase crashed to the floor and both men froze.

"What the _hell_ was _that_?!" Charles bellowed from the bedroom.

"Bruce broke a vase!" Jack yelled back.

The door was flung open and Charles stomped back into the living room, glaring at both of them. She was in high-waisted black slacks with a tailored white dress shirt tucked into them, and black suspenders.

"How did he break a vase?"

Jack licked his lips. "Uhh . . . I threw my shoes at him and he ducked."

A muscle in Charle's cheek started jumping as she snarled silently at the two men, who cowered before her. The only thing that saved them was Rachel coming out, adjusting the floor-length, sleeveless, empire-waisted gown she'd put on. It was dark red and had a wide, embroidered satin ribbon just under her breasts that tied in a bow in the back. She'd let her hair out of the bun it had been in, and it fell over her shoulders in soft waves as she licked her lips and smoothed the satin over her sides and stomach.

Jack pushed past Charles as she started to berate him, his eyes glued on his wife. He put his hands on her sides, just under her breasts, and slid them down to her hips before pulling her close.

". . . Wow," he finally managed.

"Jack, you helped me pick it out," Rachel laughed.

He swallowed sharply as his head started to throb a little. "And I stand by what I said then. Wow. We might need to ditch _this_ party early, too."

Rachel's eyes unfocused slightly as she looked up at him with a smile. "I think I like that idea," she whispered.

"Well, let's go!" Charles barked suddenly. She'd just finished lacing up knee-high black boots, and slung a black suit jacket over her shoulder. "Out, you fop, and if that cat bitch crashes this dinner, I'm skinning her alive." She grabbed Bruce by his lapels and dragged him after her. "Rachel, you look stunning. Jack, did you make that dress?"

"No," he sighed, "and it cost way too much money. But now I can make a pattern from it. Rachel made me go with her to buy maternity clothes, and they were all so damned expensive!"

"It's the extra tailoring," Rachel explained. "I told you. That and everything you looked at was silk or leather or something else that's always pricey."

"You said we were the richest people in Loleta; I figured we could splurge."

Rachel laughed as they got in the limo and Charles knelt in front on her, expertly applying subtle make-up. "And I'd like our child to be able to go to college, too," she told him, squeezing his hand.

"College, smollege. _I_ never went to college!"

"Are you sure?"

". . . No. But it sounds boring as hell." Jack stretched his legs out. "Bethany's gonna be there, right?"

"She's holding down the fort for us," Raoul said. "She should be at the restaurant when we get there."

He was right; Bethany was in a quiet back room with appetizers already served; Rachel went right for the spring rolls. When she turned to her mother, slightly embarrassed, the older woman merely laughed and hugged her.

"Feel pregnant yet?"

"Mmf!" Rachel swallowed and nodded before she hugged her mother back. "I'm sorry, Mom, I love you and I miss you ---"

"But you're pregnant and hungry, so get the hell out of your way," Bethany laughed. "That's why I ordered the appetisers early. Have at it, honey. You brought me an ultrasound picture, right?"

Jack handed her the copy they'd made, then hugged her back. "Just for you, Gramma."

"Damn right I'm a grandmother, now, and it's about damned time! I was thinking you'd forgotten your promise."

Jack blinked. "What promise?"

"The promise you made on Rachel's birthday, remember? That you'd give me grandkids?"

"Shit, you remember that?" Jack was somewhat amazed as he helped Rachel sit.

"I'm not quite the lush that everyone says I am," Bethany said with a smile. "And of course I remember. I also remember you two sneaking off early to have sex."

"With Hideki's little victory dance, I don't think it was so much 'sneaking' as just plain leaving," Jack reasoned. "And at least we waited until we got in the limo, you know?"

"_Jack_!" Rachel hissed, glaring at him.

It was too late. Bruce looked about ready to kill him. "You had sex in _my_ limo?!"

"Sure did," Jack said cheerfully. "And it was _damn_ good, too. What? You've never had sex in your limo before?"

"I'm going to kill you, Jack."

"Take a number, get in line," Jack retorted.

"Can we not fight tonight, please?" Hideki asked. "I mean, I'm all for seeing two hot men duking it out, maybe get some sweat rolling, tear some clothes . . . but let's do it without the anger, all right?" Jack settled back down with a grin and Bruce glowered, but dinner passed without further mishap.

***

"Dr. Morgenson wants me to come in early tomorrow," Jack said later that night as he lounged in the bathroom doorway and watched Rachel as she ran her hands lightly over her breasts, then over the curve of her stomach.

"Mm?" She sighed and dropped her head to one side, eyes fluttering while one hand slid between her legs. She ghosted the other hand over her breasts, toyed gently with her nipples, then dragged her fingers across her mouth as she panted.

Jack licked his lips and swallowed as he slid one hand down his torso and over his hips, curling it around his erection. "Just, ah, just wants a face-to-face check up, you know. Yeah . . ."

It amused him that Rachel was loud when he was actively involved, but quiet when she masturbated. He'd been a little concerned the first time she'd let him watch, but she'd assured him afterwards, as she lay there panting, that it was normal for her and she was entirely satisfied. And now the hand that had been on her breasts was rubbing her thigh and her breath hitched a little. Jack's heart jumped in accompaniment. He loved watching Rachel masturbate. They had a somewhat unspoken rule that he didn't join her unless invited, and that was a rule he was willing to abide by. She'd called him a pervert for enjoying it so much, but he'd only responded by telling her that she was fabulously gorgeous when she orgasmed, so how could she blame him?

Jack sank to his knees as Rachel arched her back and opened her eyes just enough to watch him. They were both breathing heavily. Jack dug the nails of his free hand into his thigh, mouth opening in a gasp as they broke skin and the pain shot straight to his pleasure centres, making him twitch and groan. He kept his eyes glued to Rachel, and it wasn't long before both of them were gasping with release. Jack took a few moments to catch his breath before he got back up and stumbled slightly to the bathroom sink, washing himself off. He grabbed a hand towel and dampened it with warm water, then went back to Rachel. She'd flopped over on her side with a smile, sighing when Jack wiped her off. He tossed the towel back toward the bathroom and then crawled into bed with her, snuggling close with a sigh.

"Hello, beautiful," he whispered in her ear.

Rachel laughed softly. "Hello, handsome."

Jack ran his hand along her side, her hip, her stomach and shoulder and arm, kissing the back of her neck. "Is that all I'm going to get?" he asked.

She laughed again and caught his wandering hand, holding it between her breasts as she settled in more. "The walls are thin, love. I'm sure Mom would ignore it, but I don't want any significant looks or remarks."

Jack snorted and tucked the covers more closely around her before he moved her hair out of the way and rested his head on the pillow. "You love me, right?" he asked quietly.

Her grip on his hand tightened. "I love you, Jack."

He sighed and closed his eyes as he relaxed. "Good."


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N:** Oaky, so sorry this was late! I'm having to go back through the other place I'm archiving the story at and convert all the chapters to word documents again, so's I can upload them here, and I've kida been avoiding doing that . . . ^^; I'll work harder at it!

Morgenson was waiting when Bethany pulled up to the curb. His arms were crossed over his chest and he wasn't smiling. Jack hesitated.

"Uh . . . I think he'd mad at me."

"Since when do you care?" Rachel asked as she opened her door and got out.

"I'll be back in an hour," Bethany said when Jack got out, too.

"You're so helpful," he muttered. She laughed and drove off. He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked up at Morgenson with a lopsided grin. "Hey, Doc. What's up?"

"Jack, Rachel." His eyebrows quirked. "My, how pregnant you look."

"Fourteen weeks today," Jack told him as he slung his arm around Rachel's shoulders and nodded. "Yep, I'ma be a dad."

"And it only took two years?" Now Morgenson was smiling as he held the door open for them.

Rachel blushed. "It was sort of an accident," she admitted.

"Oh?"

"We were fighting about me not wanting kids, which apparently put Rachel under enough stress that the birth control stopped working. Guess I shouldn't have been so keen on all that make-up sex, either."

"Too much sex can actually diminish the sperm count," Morgenson told him as he showed them into his office.

"Way to rain on my parade, Doc." Jack was grinning, though, as he pulled the ultrasound out of his pocket and handed it to Morgenson. "That was last week, and Rachel has an appointment with a doctor here in Gotham tomorrow. She uh, she failed to tell me that the risk of a miscarriage is highest in the first trimester, and goes up with age."

"I'm just fine," she assured him, looking around. Not much in the office had changed, which gave it an unfamiliar familiarity. Then Dr. Morgenson's wife poked her head in.

"Rachel! Oh, come let me see you, dear." She took Rachel's hand and pulled her out of the room. "I want to know all about the baby . . ."

Morgenson smiled after the two women as the door closed, then turned back to Jack. "So you're happy with the idea of being a father?"

Jack shrugged. "It, uh . . . it's kinda grown on me." He laughed a little. "No pun intended."

"How'd Susie and Janet react?"

"Does it matter?" Jack asked in return. "They're not _my_ kids."

Morgenson was smiling slightly. "But you care about them."

Jack shifted in his chair and scratched the back of his neck. "Yeah, so? Is that a crime?"

"Not at all; I'm glad that there are people who aren't in your personal circle who you care about, now. It's a good thing."

He got a shrug. "Well, they wouldn't leave me alone. They're okay kids, really. Mom needs to stop drinking so much." Then Jack made a face and clasped his hands together. "Uhh . . ."

Doctor Morgenson leaned back as he let out a controlled breath. "What did you do, Jack?"

"I didn't do a damned thing," was the immediate response. Then Jack rolled his eyes. "Okay, so I ran into Mary in town and stopped her from buying alcohol when Rachel was out of town, see? Took her home, made her dinner. She let me stay over 'cause I'd have had to walk home otherwise." He slapped his legs in an erratic rhythm. "So uh, so she let me sleep in a guest room and she kissed me, right? But I didn't kiss her back. Well, maybe I hesitated, but I didn't _really _kiss her and I made her go to her own room and told her I wasn't going to bang her, y'know?" Morgenson was looking politely interested, which wasn't always a good sign. "So, uh, so that made me feel bad 'cause I made her cry, and I went to apologise and ended up falling asleep on her bed. But I didn't have sex with her!"

Now Morgenson's lips twitched as he leaned forward. "Did you forget she wasn't Rachel when you woke up?" Jack winced and nodded. "Did you have sex with her _then_?"

"Hell no!" Jack shuddered. "The woman's a lush, Doc. I'm _not_ interested in her. But uh, well, we were both pretty embarrassed and then Janet was outside the door when I went to leave, and now she thinks I fucked her mom. Which I didn't."

"And you haven't told Rachel, have you?"

"Well . . . no. I mean, I didn't do anything wrong. Right?" Jack was frowning now, positive that Morgenson was enjoying his discomfort. "I stopped as soon as I realised I wasn't kissing Rachel. Okay, so I groped her a bit, too, but I didn't do it on purpose! Except now Janet takes every opportunity to not bring up that nothing happened."

He got a soft snort. "Except something did happen, and you're feeling guilty about it no matter what you say."

"Yeah, well, Rachel shouldn't have left me for a week," Jack grumbled.

Morgenson arched both eyebrows. "Are you blaming Rachel for you not being able to keep it in your pants, Jack?"

"Oh, it _stayed_ in my pants, Doc," Jack growled. "And . . . well . . ." His shoulders slumped. "I didn't take Mary home with the intent to make out with her. Yeah, I was a little confused when I woke up, but as soon as I realised she wasn't Rachel, I left. Why should I feel guilty for an honest mistake?"

"Would you have felt any remorse at all if this had happened three years ago? Two?"

"I probably would have started crying," Jack scoffed. "I was such a pussy after Harleen died . . ."

"Yes, you've developed quite the backbone," Morgenson said dryly. "Has there ever been a time in either marriage that you would have slept with another person?"

"Never got a chance to with Harleen."

"That's not what I asked."

Jack shifted in his chair with a frown as he looked to the side. "Well . . . maybe. I don't know. Not with Rachel, I mean, not at all. But Harleen?" He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'm . . . not sure." He snorted. "She made sure that she was the only woman I ever thought I had a chance with."

"She really did love you, Jack," Morgenson said quietly.

"I made sure she did," Jack replied. "I mean, I did everything I could to make her happy. I didn't . . . want to be tossed away. So . . . she got her book deals and her interviews and her fame, and I got out of Arkham, a routine I could work with, positive attention, a steady supply of sex . . . It worked." He leaned back in the chair. "Besides, she's been dead almost four years. I really prefer the life I have now."

"Even with a child on the way?"

Jack rolled his eyes. "What the fuck do you people want from me? Yeah, I didn't want a kid with those murders going on, which _will_ start up again, mind you --- but everyone acts like I'm just going to up and leave because Rachel's knocked up! Well, maybe I _do_ want a baby," he growled. "Maybe I _want_ to be a dad. Maybe I'm excited about it, huh?" He rubbed his temples with a wince. "And don't get me wrong, I'm excited about the baby. I'm just not reacting the way people think I should, so they're all on my case about it. I just want to be happy my own way, all right? I don't want people to keep asking if I'm happy, like they think I'm not."

"Do you remember when you told me you wanted a baby with Rachel?"

Jack groaned and covered his face. "Like I told you, I was _such_ a pussy after Harleen died. And then when I fell in love with Rachel? Ugh, I was ready to try _anything_ if it kept her with me."

Morgenson laughed a little. "So, you changed your mind about it? What would have happened if Rachel had brought up children before the murders started?"

Jack chewed at his scars as he thought. "I'd have probably . . . bitched and moaned and whined and found a way to replace her pills with duds." He grinned up at the ceiling. "I'm gonna be a daddy . . . heh . . ."

They moved on to other topics, including Jack's attachment to the Mitzi-thing and his friendship with her father. Morgenson was surprised that Jack had formed a friendship with a police officer.

"Tom's a good guy," Jack shrugged. "He, uh . . . his old man . . ." He coughed. "Yeah, we've got some things in common. I figure, if Tom's doing so good with the Mitzi-thing, I might not do so bad with my own."

"And what if he hurts her?"

"I'll kill him." Jack blinked slowly, not quite sure those words had actually come out of his mouth. "Uhm . . . did I just . . . ?"

"Yes," Morgenson nodded, "you did. It's all right, Jack. That's an admirable reaction, one that more people should have when faced with abuse. Maybe not to the point of killing people, but more people certainly need to put a stop to it when they're faced with it."

Jack relaxed. "Well, we've agreed that if either of us gets violent with our wives or kids, the other one has permission to beat the crap out of the abuser."

Morgenson laughed. "Nice plan."

"Thanks."

Fifteen minutes later Bethany pulled up, ending the meeting. Jack said his goodbyes and pulled Rachel into the car gratefully. Morgenson had advised him to tell her what had happened at Mary's, but he really didn't see the point. If he'd felt the slightest attraction to Mary, sure, he'd tell Rachel. But he didn't. Jack held Rachel's hand and smiled at her. No, everything was fine as it was.

"Are you ready?" she asked him as they got out of the car.

"Yep. Just uh, just get you down the aisle and then stand there looking pretty." He snorted with laughter. "It's easy."

He got a kiss on the nose, then the lips. "Good," Rachel whispered. She smoothed his black dress shirt down and smiled up at him. "You look so handsome."

"I tell myself so every day," he teased with a smile. "You're beautiful, as always."

Rachel blushed as she slid her arm through his. Her dress for the wedding was a summery thing, sleeveless, high waisted and knee-length. It had a yellow and orange floral pattern on a white background and the skirt had a flirty swish to it. The matching heels had straps around her ankles, which always turned Jack on. Something about that little strip around those delicate ankles . . .

"Are you thinking about my ankles?" Rachel murmured in his ear as they walked into the small house; it was Hideki's parents, she recalled.

Jack coughed and grinned. "Uh . . . yeah . . ."

"I thought so." She was smiling as a small Asian woman noticed them and hurried over.

"Ah! Rachel and Jack!" Her accent was still obvious, her 'l's almost 'r's, and there was a very tiny 'u' after her end consonants. She shook Jack's hand. "I am Yuriko, Hideki's mother."

And on cue, her son started wailing from another room. "_Okaa-san! Tetsudatte! Ore no nekutai ga shimenai!_"

"Ah! Kuru! Kuru! So sorry," she said as Hideki continued to wail. "_Damare!_" she bellowed up the stairs. Rachel and Jack jumped as she turned a sweet smile on them. "Please, come in. Here is my husband, he will help you." She waved at a tall man, then bolted up the stairs.

"Sorry about that," the man said as he held his hand out. "Kid's having a nervous breakdown up there. I'm Aidan O'Hara."

"Jack Dawes. Uh . . . you've met Rachel, right?"

"Yeah, she came over once or twice. How are you? Congratulations, by the way. Hideki told us the good news."

"What, that Christ has risen?" Jack quipped.

Aidan blinked at him, then smiled slightly. "Not quite. I meant about the baby."

"Oh, that, too. Yeah, we're proud." He hugged Rachel's waist. "So, other than Hideki freaking out, every thing's good?"

"Surprisingly. He'll be screaming for you soon enough, Rachel, if you want to go up and see him. Raoul's in the downstairs guest room."

"Go on, tiger," Jack said as he pushed Rachel toward the stairs. "I'll uh, I'll go see what Raoul's up to."

"Right, send _me_ to the hysterical one. I love you, too, Jack." Rachel blew him a kiss as she walked up the stairs, following the sounds of the argument to Hideki's old room. She paused in the doorway and watched him and his mother gesture at each other, Japanese falling from their lips faster than she could follow. Then Hideki caught sight of her and whipped around, still speaking Japanese as he waved his tie around.

"I can't understand you," Rachel interrupted. "You'll have to speak English."

"Eeeeeh?" He shook his head and blinked rapidly. "Ah! Oh. English. Got it." He batted his mother's hands away. "_Haha, yamette!_ You know I can't put a tie on, Rachel. _Tasukette!_"

"I'm assuming that's something along the lines of 'help me.' Come here." Rachel smiled as she took the fabric from him and wrapped it around his neck, her fingers moving nimbly. "Other than your tie incompetency, how are you?"

"Is Raoul still downstairs? Have you seen him yet?"

Hideki sounded anxious and his lower lip trembled. Rachel laughed a little. "Jack's with him right now. What, are you afraid he'll skip out on you?" Her friend looked down at the floor. "He's not going to, Hideki. Isn't he the one who proposed?"

"Well, yeah, but . . . he's only twenty-five, you know? He's still young."

"And twenty-eight's ancient?" Rachel laughed. "I think he's ready for this, Hideki."

His brown eyes were shining as he beamed at her. "_I'm_ ready for this. I'm _so_ ready for this, Rachel. You know that scene in When Harry Met Sally, toward the end, when Billy Crystal tells Meg Ryan that when you find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you want the rest of your life to start right away? That's how I've felt since I met him."

Yuriko was sniffling into a handkerchief as Rachel hugged her friend. "He loves you, too, Hideki. And he's probably just as nervous as you are."

"Were you nervous before you married Jack?"

She laughed again. "Hideki, you were _there_. You don't remember me being hysterical?"

"Was Jack nervous?"

She nodded. "He was. He kept saying he had to be dreaming. And here we are, almost two years later, with a baby on the way. So don't worry so much, all right?"

Hideki took a deep breath and nodded. "All right. I can do this. You're the best," he said as he hugged her tightly.

Rachel hugged him back. "I try."

Downstairs, Jack was tying his hair back with a couple of black ribbons. "Nervous yet?"

"Of course I am," Raoul replied.

"Yeah, I was, too. Wayne had to keep me from crawling out the window."

That made the younger man laugh. "Are you sure he wasn't the one who suggested it?"

Jack shrugged. "Oh, he was, but he changed his mind when I took him seriously. Crap, that was almost two years ago . . ."

"Two years next month," he was reminded. "Do I look all right?"

"You look fine," Jack muttered. "I mean, you do. Do I need to blow you to prove it?"

Raoul laughed a little harder than the offer called for. "No, thanks. Just a little nervous, man."

"Oh, I feel you. Anybody from work gonna be here?"

"Just Gordon. We weren't going to invite him, but he pulled me aside a week ago and said that if he wasn't invited, he'd bust my ass back to training. So, uh, he'll be here." He laughed. "There's a reason we call him Commissioner Awesome."

Jack laughed. "Yeah, he's got some fight in him." Then he frowned a little. "Are your folks gonna be here?"

Some of the light in Raoul's eyes faded. He licked his lips and shook his head once. "Ah, no. They're, uh . . . busy."

"Busy because they're flakes, or busy because you're gay?"

"Busy because I'm gay." Raoul cleared his throat and forced a smile to his face. "But Yuriko and Aidan more than make up for it. Heh, when I first met them, Aidan said he'd known Hideki was going to be gay since Hideki was five, and Aidan caught him wearing a neighbour girl's dress and posing like a princess in it. Said he knew right then. They're . . . proud of us both," Raoul murmured as he stared at his reflection in the mirror. "Threw me a party when I made Sergeant. My own folks . . . well, we don't talk."

"Sorry about that, man." Jack slapped his shoulder. "But hey, sounds like Hideki's parents more than make up for it, right?"

"You have no idea how to deal with this situation, Jack. Don't try." But Raoul was smiling again as Aidan knocked on the door.

"You two ready? Hideki's about to wet himself."

"Yeah, we're ready," Raoul said with a grin. "Come on, man, places."

Jack followed Aidan to the dining room, which opened out into the back yard. Rachel was already there with a stick of celery in one hand. He grinned at her and she rolled her eyes back.

"Not trying to climb out any windows today?" she asked sweetly.

"I only do that when_ I _get married," he told her as he tweaked her nose.

"So if I ever catch you crawling out a window, I know something's very wrong?"

"Something like that." Yuriko came through then, shushing everyone and making sure they knew their places. Rachel popped the rest of her celery into her mouth and chewed as quickly as she could as Jack tried not to laugh, his hand at the small of her back. Bruce and Charles were right behind them, and he threw a smirk at the man before the door opened and he walked Rachel down the aisle. No amount of cajoling had managed to get Charles into a dress, but her shirt was off the shoulders and had a floppy trim to it, and her black slacks flared out on the bottoms.

Jack paid minimal attention during the ceremony. It was great that the two men were finally getting hitched, but he wasn't one for all the hooplah. Rachel was across from him, tearing up, but he'd been absolutely forbidden from doing anything that might embarrass anyone, cause a ruckus, or be otherwise inappropriate on camera. He'd considered disobeying, but Hideki and Raoul had been nice for his own wedding, so he figured he'd return the favour today.

"Whatcha thinkin'?" he asked later, as he and Rachel danced in the waning heat of early evening. Her breath was warm on his neck as she sighed.

"You."

"Me?" he whispered with a grin.

"And the baby."

"Baby, huh? Any particular thoughts about either of us?"

Rachel laughed, her curled hair bouncing across her shoulders as she shook her head. He enjoyed the warmth of her in his arms and brought their entwined hands up to his lips, kissing her fingers as he smiled down at her.

"Just . . . good thoughts. I love your arms," she whispered.

Jack's grin was ear-to-ear. "Yeah? Tell me about them." He flexed for her benefit, earning him another warm laugh.

"Well," Rachel said as she curled her fingers around his biceps, "they're strong, for one. Amazingly strong." Jack purred low in his throat. "I think you'll look so handsome, holding the baby in them. She'll be safe, protected . . ."

He hadn't thought of that. Jack's satisfied purr turned into a low laugh as the idea of a baby acquired a lot more appeal.

"She, huh? You really want me to terrorize it?"

Rachel smiled up at him. "I think you'll do better with a little girl."

"We'll call her Jackie," he said before he kissed her nose.

"What if I don't like Jackie?"

"Jackarina?"

She laughed again "Uhm, no. Too Russian."

The corners of his eyes crinkled. "_You're_ the one who wanted me to pick out names."

"Pick them out, Jack, not make them up. Ooh!" He'd dipped her, holding her securely in his strong arms, and she laughed as dizziness washed over her. Rachel grasped at his shoulders. "That was mean."

"Really? I thought it was romantic. Psh, what do I know?"

Hideki skittered by, laughing as he plopped a woven straw cowboy hat on Jack's head. "I love you two!"

Rachel wiggled her eyebrows. "Yee-haw," she murmured. He tipped it at her and laughed.

"So what's up with Bruce and Charles, huh?" he asked as the two whirled past them.

Rachel shrugged. "I don't know."

"He seems pretty whipped."

That earned him another laugh. "You two finally have something in common, then."

Jack widened his eyes at her. "Hey! I am _not_ . . . well, all right, I'm whipped. But don't tell anybody we've got some common ground, okay? I have my image to maintain."

Rachel placed a kiss right below his ear and he shuddered. "I promise," she whispered. She tugged at his ponytail until he leaned his head back and kissed his Adam's apple as he laughed again.


	17. Chapter 17

"Why don't you love me?" Rachel muttered to herself as she rested her hands on her lower back.

Jack looked up from the book he'd been reading as he lay on the couch and raised his eyebrows. "Whoa, I thought we were past this stage."

"I wasn't talking to _you_," she said a little crossly. "I'm just . . . ugh . . ."

His lips twisted in sympathy and Jack sat up, patting his lap. He made a point of not wincing when she settled on it, just wrapping his arms around her and resting his head on her shoulder. "Glowing? Radiant? Gorgeous? I can go on for a long time, you know." He pressed his hand into her lower abdomen firmly and concentrated. "Is it moving?"

"No, it's sleeping, thank God. Doesn't mean I don't feel like crap, though." She whimpered a little. "My back hurts so _much_ . . ."

"Need to soak in the bath?" Jack whispered as he moved one hand to her lower back and rubbed.

"We don't have time; I need to meet with the Jenkins this morning and I really can't be late."

Rachel's tone of voice said it was a bad idea to try to reason with her, so Jack just rubbed her back and poked into her stomach. "Hey, you," he murmured, "give her a break, huh? She's working real hard for all of us. I don't want to have to tell you again, kid."

That made Rachel smile, at least. She cupped his cheeks and kissed him, her tongue slipping against his scars. Jack sighed into the kiss. He held her tighter when she moved her kisses up his scars, wondering why he'd _ever_ thought she might not like them. A sigh escaped his lips and he smiled.

"We'll be late if you don't stop, baby," he whispered in her ear. Rachel shifted in his lap and moaned softly as she moved to the curled scar on his right cheek. Her nails were leaving visible marks on his neck, he knew, but it felt too good to push her away just yet. She'd reached a point where when she wanted sex, she wanted it _now_, and she was more responsive than she'd ever been.

"Are you actually refusing sex?" she asked in disbelief.

"And you don't know how hard it is to do, you really don't," Jack replied as his heart raced and his temples throbbed. It was almost getting too risky to get agitated in any way. He was going to miss her warmth against him. "But you've got things to do, otherwise we'll be late for the appointment, and I wanna know what we're having."

"It's not because I'm not thin any more?"

Jack laughed and hugged Rachel tightly. "Oh, Christ, Rachel, I'd roll around in bed with you all _day_ if I could." He leaned over to kiss her stomach, running his hands over her and enjoying her new curves. "You're just . . . so . . . uuuugh, we need to go." He stood up and then had to sit on the arm of the couch, his head between his knees as he took deep breaths.

Rachel frowned down at him. She hadn't noticed his headaches until a month ago, but they seemed to be getting worse and she was getting worried. He hadn't said anything about them, but then, Jack never let on when he wasn't feeling well until he could barely move. He was like a cat in that regard, hiding all potential weaknesses from the world.

Still, this had gone on long enough. She ran her fingers through his hair and he hummed softly. "Jack . . ."

"Gotta go, come on," he said as he stood up and took her arm.

Rachel sighed as they walked out to the car. "Jack, how long have you been getting these headaches?"

He glanced at her, his eyes squinting a little with the pain. It had to have been bad, for him to show that amount of discomfort. "What headaches?"

"Don't lie to me, Jack. You've been getting headaches on a regular basis for at least a month and probably more."

He shrugged. "Hey, you're not the only one who's been stressed out, okay? You don't . . ." Jack sighed and narrowed his eyes at the road. "When we were fighting, I didn't . . . I didn't like it." Then he sighed. "It's not that simple. I mean . . . I _need_ you to touch me, Rachel. I _need_ to know that you want _me_ to touch _you_. And . . . you didn't. And, well . . ." He scratched the inside of his ear. "It . . . got to me. And then you got pregnant, which didn't help at all. So . . . yeah, I've got some excess tension. I'll be all right."

Rachel was quiet for a few moments before reaching over and taking his hand, squeezing it. Jack relaxed. Maybe it was a tumour. That made his lips twitch. Yeah, a tumour, in his head, causing this incessant pain that made him want to shriek and claw and rend and tear until the world burned down around him.

Yeah. A tumour.

"Snow can wait, I forgot my mittens . . ." He was singing to himself off an on as he typed at his laptop outside the deli. "I put my hand in my father's glove . . ." He didn't really have anything to do for the day, aside from finding out what gender the baby was. Two years ago today. Two whole years. " . . . you must learn to stand up for yourself, 'cause I can't always be around . . ." And he didn't have a damned thing planned, other than this morning's breakfast in bed and a nice dinner. "When you gonna make up your mind? When you gonna love you as much as I do?" There was no reason for him to feel so melancholy about today, no reason other than the song stuck in his head. "Boys get discovered as winter melts; flowers competing for the sun . . ." Gentle fingers touched his hair and he leaned his head back, closing his eyes. "Skating around the truth, who I am . . ." They dug into his shoulders and he lowered his head, closing his laptop. "I tell you that I'll always want you near . . ." He was finding it more difficult to be content as the time went by. "You say I wanted you to be proud . . . I always wanted that, myself . . ."

"You shouldn't be depressed on your anniversary."

Her voice was a soft whisper and Jack pulled her into his lap, burying his face in the space between her neck and shoulder and inhaling deeply. She put packets of lavender in her dresser drawers and the closet because she knew the scent relaxed him. She knew him so well . . .

"Sorry," he murmured.

Rachel pressed a kiss to his hairline and held him tightly. "It's all right."

Still, he felt the need to reassure her. "It's nothing specific. Just . . . general."

"Jack, it's all right. Come on, let's go . . . if you're ready?"

He finally looked up at her, tracing the pearl necklace he'd given her the previous year, courtesy of Wayne, his fingers soft on her cheeks as she smiled at him.

"Okay." Jack nodded as he took a deep breath. "I'm ready." He knew Rachel hated it when he got like this, knew that she knew that he couldn't help it, knew that she understood, but . . . today, of all days, he should have been happy, or at least able to hide his depression better. She didn't let his hand go until they were in Dr. Howard's office and she was on the examination table. "Okay, Doc, gimme some good news."

The gel must have been warm this time, because Rachel didn't make a noise when Howard spread it over her abdomen. "Are we thinking pink, or are we thinking blue?"

"Purple," Jack replied. "I want a hermaphrodite." He was holding Rachel's hand and she smiled at him. They watched as the baby appeared on the screen, moving around in response to not only Doctor Howard's probing, but also the finger Jack was digging into Rachel's stomach. "Move, kid."

"Just a second . . ." Howard was making more of those infuriating notes and once again not explaining himself, but then the baby flipped over in response to a particularly firm jab from it's father and he raised his eyebrows. "Well, _that_ was easy."

"What was easy?" Jack demanded. "What is it?"

Dr. Howard gestured at the image. "The baby's certainly not shy. See? It's curled up right now, but those are the legs, that's the buttocks, and _that_," he said as he pointed to the dark little triangle between the legs and rear, "is _not_ a penis. Congratulations, you're having a girl." He turned to the parents with a smile.

Jack stared at the moving baby for a long time, feeling like the bottom of his world had once more dropped out from beneath him. Even Rachel's faint gasp as it turned over didn't distract him, not until she placed his hand firmly on her lower abdomen and pressed in. His eyes traced the movements of the baby for a while before his brain registered the corresponding pulses from Rachel that his hand was feeling. Then he turned to her with a sharp intake of breath and wide eyes.

"That's ---"

"The baby," she finished with a huge grin even as tears started falling down her cheeks. "Oh my God, Jack, that's the baby! I didn't . . . Oh my God . . . I've been feeling it --- her --- for a while now, I just didn't realise it! Can you feel her, Jack? Can you feel your baby?"

Jack looked back at the ultrasound screen and started laughing. "I can feel her," he whispered. He pulled Rachel into a one-armed hug, his heart aching as much as his head, now. He was smiling, the tiny flutters against his palm a welcome relief from his darker thoughts. This little girl . . . he needed her. "Rachel . . . you two . . ." He pressed his face into her hair and moisture leaked from his eyes.

"I love you, too, Jack," Rachel whispered back.

"Parlotto's?" Rachel asked with a smile.

Jack grinned. "Don't you worry your pretty vegetarian head; I had a word with the cooks. The menu's been taken care of."

He was in a black button-down shirt and black jeans, and Rachel didn't know where he'd gotten black cowboy boots but he'd found them. With his dark blond hair loose and curly, he made her mouth water just looking at him. In fact, she'd jumped him the moment he'd come downstairs in the outfit, and he'd been sewing buttons back on until he'd told her to pull up to the restaurant. Her own outfit had survived in much better condition on account of being stretchy and cotton. The black dress had spaghetti straps, a square neckline, and ruched top. The skirt fell from the empire waist down to mid-thigh, at which point the ruffles started, looping from the middle of her calves in the front to the floor in the back.

"Ah, Jack, Rachel, there you are. You're a bit late." Mr. Parlotto was smiling as Jack held the door open for Rachel, then pointed a finger at her.

"She jumped me."

"Can you blame me?" she replied, her cheeks flushing a little more. She was deliriously beautiful, and getting more so by the day.

Parlotto laughed. "You're absolutely stunning, Rachel. I hear you had another ultrasound today? Or do you not want to know what the baby is yet?"

She beamed up at Jack. His chest puffed out as he returned her grin. "It's a girl," he declared proudly.

"Oh-hooo," Parlotto laughed as he showed them to their table. "I don't know who I pity more, you or the baby."

"What do you mean?" Jack asked. His smile was starting to fade.

Parlotto slapped his shoulder in what he probably though was a reassuring manner. "Well, just think of what she's going to look like in fifteen years. I mean . . ." He gestured at Rachel and raised his eyebrows pointedly. "If she looks anything like her mom, the boys'll be chomping at the bit." Jack's face had frozen in a partial smile, but it held no humour. "Sparkling cider?"

Rachel reached out and took Jack's hand and he looked back at her slowly, a muscle in his cheek jumping a little. "Yes, please."

"I'll be right back."

"Jack? Are you all right?" Rachel was trying not to laugh; he looked _so_ horrified.

"I'm . . . uh . . . yeah. She's grounded until she's forty." Oh, shit . . . Jack looked Rachel over carefully and shook his head. "No, no, I'm rethinking this baby. I can't handle ---"

"If we're lucky, she'll turn out like Janet."

"Oh, yeah, Janet," Jack mumbled. "Head over heels with the first bad boy older man she sees. Much better." Rachel's eyes got bigger and he smirked. "What, you didn't think I'd noticed she wants me? Come on, give me a little credit, Rach."

She snorted, still smiling. "And you figured this out . . . when?"

He shrugged. "About a week ago. I uh, I heard some of the girls in class talking about it."

That made Rachel laugh. "I thought so. So . . . is this the wrong time to ask about names?"

He gave her a hard stare. "_Yes_." Rachel covered a laugh and the shine of the low lighting on the slave bracelet she'd attached to her wedding band for the night caught his eye. He rubbed his fingers over it and smiled at her. "You haven't worn _this_ in a while."

She raised her left hand to cup his cheek and he leaned into the contact. "I thought you might need to be reminded who you belong to."

One eyebrow went up. "_You're_ the one with the slave bracelet."

Rachel laughed low in her throat and Jack's heart almost stopped. "You wouldn't do the splits right here if I asked sweetly?" She'd curled her hair and Jack's lips pursed as he toyed with one, not meeting her eyes.

"Yeah, well . . . Just don't let that get out, all right? I've got an image to maintain." Rachel laughed again. She caught his hand and brought it to her upper chest, where he wrapped his fingers around her pearl necklace and tugged gently before he licked his lips. "So . . . what, you want diamond-encrusted rope tonight?"

She flushed and looked around, leaning closer. "I'll take the silk hankies, thank you."

"_Really_." Jack was enjoying this, the way she was shifting in her seat as her eyes darkened, and they'd only just gotten their drinks. "Top or bottom?"

Rachel swallowed sharply. "Well . . . you've been working hard, Jack." She looked up at him through her lashes and he had to remind himself to breathe. "I think you ought to lay back and . . . relax . . . tonight." His skin was on fire where it was touching hers; he was breathless.

"Well," and he swallowed, "I'm yours to command." He wanted her. He wanted her _so_ badly, so _very_ badly. "What should I do first?"

"I'm not talking dirty with you where people can hear us," Rachel whispered. Jack leaned far across the table and took her face in his hands, kissing her firmly. Rachel gasped a little before responding, and then Jack sat back.

"Couldn't help myself," he murmured. "You're so beautiful tonight . . ."

"Six months along is a good time," Rachel replied as she dabbed at her lips, making sure he hadn't smeared the dark red lipstick she had on.

"Shit, was that really six months ago?" he wondered aloud.

"It was," Rachel nodded. "We're halfway there." The made her eyes crinkle as she smiled. "Sometimes I don't believe it. Then I get up to pee for the fifth time and it's hard to ignore."

Jack chuckled. "Still, it's nice to have someone to share my insomnia with, even if it _is_ just long enough for a trip to the bathroom." He took her hand and kissed it.

"You're sure you won't take medicine for it?"

He shook his head. "I take too much medicine already, babe. I've dealt with it for as long as I can remember, and I'll keep dealing with it." Then he grinned. "Besides, it means you can sleep through the late-night feedings."

_That_ made Rachel's face light up. "God bless the insomniacs." She reached into her purse and pulled out a long white envelope, pushing it across the table to him.

That made him pause mid-bite and he raised his eyebrows. "What's this?"

"Your anniversary gift. Not as fancy as a necklace you made Bruce buy, but I'm sure you'll love it."

"What, am I supposed to use your own money to buy you a gift?" Jack asked cautiously.

Rachel laughed. "I didn't say I was upset. Open it."

He took his time, enjoying the shine of excitement in her eyes and her impatient wiggling. Then he took out the two tickets and his eyes got huge. "Raped by Zombies tickets?! No way!"

"Yes, your favourite goth metal girl band. They're playing in Gotham October twenty-sixth."

Jack looked up with a frown. "You'll be eight months by then. Can you go?"

Rachel sighed. "I wasn't planning on it."

He shook his head. "Well, I don't want to go if you're not coming with me. I mean, thank you so much, Rachel, but without you, it's not really worth it." Plus he'd have to leave her alone in Loleta. All alone, almost ready to give birth. Alone.

Rachel smiled. "Well, as it turns out, Charles likes them, too. And Hideki and Raoul said they'd stay here that weekend, so I'll be perfectly safe." She took his head again. "Look, we'll see what happens, Jack. If Philip says I can travel to Gotham, I'll go and stay with Mom for the weekend."

"Come on, Rachel, I've heard you singing 'Midea's Fratricide' before."

"And that's the _only_ song of theirs that I like."

He laughed. "Come on, Elizabeth Tess' voice is amazing. Did you know that's not her real name? Elizabeth is her middle name; Hollyn's her first name."

"Is that why it's on your name list, then?"

Jack shrugged innocently. "It's a pretty name. Rachel's a pretty name, too, but uh, that would get a little awkward. I don't know how people can stand naming their kids after themselves." He shuddered a little, then again when her fingers trailed along his neck. This was a good shudder, though. Jack's pulse raced as he watched her from under lowered eyelids. His voice was a little husky when he spoke again. "I thought we might go dancing after dinner . . . unless . . . ?"

"Home," Rachel whispered. "Definitely home."

Jack smiled.

Half an hour later there was a roaring fire in the fireplace and he was on his knees, his hands tied behind his back, his tongue sweeping over Rachel's clit as she moaned on the couch. He'd stopped humming a while ago. It distracted him from the delicious sounds that Rachel was making. She was crying, which always made him pause until he was sure it was just from an overload of good emotions and she didn't want him to stop, then she grabbed him by the hair and pushed him back on the floor.

Jack fell with a grin, licking his lips. Just his wrists were tied, which allowed him to prop himself up on his elbows with little to no discomfort as Rachel settled on his hips. His eyes rolled back as he groaned. She certainly knew how to drive him wild. He loved it; he loved her nails digging into his chest and shoulders, he loved her hair in his face, he loved the weight of her stomach against his, he loved her half-closed eyes and open-mouth moans, loved how her thighs clenched around his hips, how she bit her lower lip, how her entire body arched as she orgasmed.

He even loved how his wrists and shoulders howled in pain when she leaned forward and pressed them into the carpeted floor, but only for a moment.

"Ow," he whimpered.

"Oh! I'm sorry, Jack."

"'S all good," he mumbled, then kissed her when she reached behind him to untie his wrists. "Comfy here?" He lay her down next to him and pulled the comforter off of the couch, covering the both of them.

"Perfectly," Rachel whispered with a smile.

"Good." He pressed his forehead against her collarbone and took a deep breath. "I love you, Rachel."

That simple admission made her sniff and tighten her arms around him. "I love you, too, Jack."


	18. Chapter 18

_There is this thing keeping everyone's lungs and lips locked._

_It is called fear and it's seeing a great renaissance._

_~The Dresden Dolls~_

_"Sing"_

Jack didn't look up from peeling potatoes when Janet hopped up on the counter next to him. "What's up, doll?" She was nervous, swinging her feet and lowering her head between her shoulders.

"Uhm . . . I had, uh . . . a question . . ."

"Yeah? About what? I'm all ears."

Janet cleared her throat and fingered the earrings he and Rachel had given her for her birthday the previous month. "Well . . . When did you and Rachel first have sex?"

That made Jack pause, and he turned his head just enough to look at her out of the corner of his eye. Rachel had warned him this conversation was coming, bless her. He went back to the potatoes. "Does Hayden want to have sex?"

The answer was obvious in the way she curled in on herself, lowering her head so her hair covered her face. "Uh . . . he's mentioned it . . ."

"Let me guess: 'If you loved me, you'd have sex with me.' That about right?"

"Hayden likes me!" Janet said defensively.

"Hayden wants pussy," Jack replied. "Do _you_ want to have sex?"

"I don't know," Janet whispered.

"Then don't have sex. Rachel and I had a lot of issues we needed to come to terms with, so we waited until we were both able to handle the consequences of sleeping together." He smiled to himself. "Four years ago today . . . What a birthday present _that_ was."

"So . . . it was . . . comfortable?"

Jack sighed and finally turned to Janet with raised eyebrows. "Of course it was. We weren't exactly celibate before we had sex --- there's lots of ways to be intimate without, ah, actual intercourse." He cleared his throat and leaned against the counter. "So we both knew what the other liked, and it was just a matter of fitting tab J into slot R." Janet's face twisted and she whined a little. Jack laughed. "Sorry. Didn't mean to embarrass you." She was shifting like Rachel shifted, though, and that made Jack grin. "I'd wait, if I were you. A girl's first time is usually with a very inexperienced horny boy who lasts about three seconds and has no idea about foreplay." He snorted and rubbed his temples. "What they _really_ need is an experienced man, who knows to take his time and then last when it counts."

Janet was breathing too heavily, trying to hide it, and Jack ignored it as he turned to slice the potatoes he'd just peeled. "So . . . what about kissing?"

"Kissing where?"

"Uh . . . the lips? I mean, Hayden wants to, uhm . . . his tongue . . ."

Jack sighed as he shook his head. "Damn kid thinks he's Casanova. Like I said, wait until you find a guy who _knows_ how to kiss."

"_You_ know how to kiss," Janet whispered.

He raised his eyebrows again and plunked the potatoes into a pot on the stove. "And what happened to you freaking out over me staying the night, hmm?"

"Oh, God, I'm so sorry!" Janet jumped off the counter and bolted for the door, but Jack had her by the elbow and pulled her against him, faintly amused. "I'm so sorry, Jack, I didn't --- I mean . . . I'm sorry!"

Jack chuckled. "Shut up and stop squirming. Now, look," he said as he cupped her cheek. "I'm only going to do this once, so pay attention, all right?" He was stroking her cheek lightly with his thumb, his fingers curling around her neck. "This is what a man _should_ do. You should _want_ to kiss him, for one." His head was pulsing in time with his heart, almost in time with Janet's breathing as he lowered his head and held his lip right above hers. "He should ask your permission . . . may I kiss you?"

The young girl whimpered and nodded her head, her breath hot on his mouth as her eyes fluttered shut. Jack grinned and ghosted his lips over hers, delighting in the way her hands raised to his arms and gripped them. This was soooo _fun_.

"He should take his time," he said between light kisses. "He should wait until you're ready." His kisses got firmer. "And if you don't know what to do, just do what he's doing." Now Jack sucked on her lower lip gently, slid his tongue along it when she gasped and clutched at his back. He had her back against the fridge and was keeping one hand on her cheek and the other around her waist. Janet was whimpering again, and after a few more nibbles to her lips he angled his head a bit more, moving his tongue a little more into her mouth with every lick of her lips.

Janet moaned softly as she mimicked his movements, even if she was still a little shy about it. Jack was taking his time, though. The only thing he stopped her from doing was arching her hips against his; that was dancing on the edge of control even for _him_. After a few more moments even kissing her was too much, so Jack slowly ended it, pulling his face back and stroking her cheek as he tilted his head at her.

"_That's_ what should happen, and _that's_ why you should wait to have sex," he murmured hoarsely. "Are you all right?" She was clinging to him for support, panting and nodding. "Good." Jack tilted her head up to look at him and Janet was starting to look guilty. "You know that I love my wife, right?"

"Uh?" She nodded quickly, trembling.

Jack smiled as he stepped away from her. "Good. Now go away, and don't talk to me for the rest of the day." He said it gently, with a smile, and Janet's eyes drifted down to his hips before she blushed, turned, and ran out the kitchen door. Jack turned to go to the bathroom, fully intent on taking care of his own excitement, just as Bruce and Charles stepped into view. The looks on their faces said they'd seen enough that he was in trouble, and Jack wasn't in the mood to try to wiggle out of it. "Move," he said shortly. They didn't. His eyes narrowed. "Give me two minutes and then you can yell at me."

"Oh, no," Charles said lightly as Bruce snarled. "We'll yell now. I didn't realise 'paedophile' was one of your talents."

"It's not," he snapped. "Prepubescent kids don't do anything for me. Janet's sixteen and, well . . ." He made curvy motions with his hands, backing up as Bruce advanced and letting the man wrap his hands around his throat. He _really_ wanted to fuck at the moment, but a fight would do. "Hey, it was just a kiss. You know I adore Rachel." He coughed a bit as Bruce's grip tightened, struggling to breathe. "She needed a real kiss, I gave it to her. Back off, B."

"You're taking advantage of an emotionally vulnerable girl," Bruce growled. "Your behaviour's getting worse by the day, _Jack_."

His vision was greying out at the edges, but Jack wrapped his hands around Bruce's wrists anyway. "It'll get a whole lot worse," he said with a cough, "before it gets better. You know that." Then he kneed Bruce in the groin and laughed as the man doubled over. He got a fist in the face from Charles, though, which sent him to the floor as well. "Fuck."

The former Marine towered over him, for once, her hands on her hips as he and Bruce both gasped. "Now, we can't tell Rachel about this for obvious reasons --- and oh, yes, I'm in on your little plot." She knelt down and dug a knife under his chin; Jack's eyes widened. "But if you _ever_ lay your hands like that on _anyone_ other than Rachel _again_, I'll cut your balls off myself."

"Murders started again yesterday," he whispered, his eyes cold and barely alive. "We don't have much time."

"And you're going to spend the time you _do_ have being a husband to your wife and a father to your baby. Is that clear?" He nodded fractionally. Charles flipped her knife shut and stood up. "Now, I've become a registered doula . . . it's a sort of live-in midwife," she explained when he blinked. "I'm going to stay with you and Rachel, and do my best to keep her together until you get back. And you iwill/i get back," she said warningly.

"_Fi_gures you'd go for a domi_na_trix type, B," Jack coughed as he finally sat up. Bruce was on his knees, still glaring. "Eeeveryone needs to give control up _some_ time."

"You watch your language," he was told. Charles hauled both of them up and both men winced, then Bruce smoothed his shirt down. "Don't go near that girl if you can't keep it in your pants."

"Why the hell do you think I told her not to talk to me for the rest of the day, B?" Jack asked irritably. The potatoes were boiling and he turned back to them. "Thanks, Charles."

"Well, it'll let me keep an ---"

"Shut up," Jack growled as he bowed his head in pain. "Just shut up. I don't know anything."

The two behind him were quiet, then Bruce sighed. "All right. Just . . . all right." Charles must have pushed him or gestured or isomething/i, because Bruce left and then the small blonde was helping him finish dinner.

"When ---"

"What are your plans for Halloween? Will you be here by then?"

"We'll talk with Rachel about it. You _do_ know that kissing Janet was wrong on several levels, don't you, Jack?"

"I don't really care at the moment."

"You have to care. You can't lose it just yet, is what I'm saying. You can't. Heard of the 7440 Club?"

"Skeazy bar just outside of town," Jack confirmed.

"Any idea why Veronica Johnson spends so much time there?"

"She's a skeazy whore?" he guessed. "Should I be concerned?"

"I was just wondering why such an apparently upstanding woman would hang out there, and why her husband doesn't seem to know or care where she is at night."

That _was_ an interesting observation. Jack finished the potatoes and then turned the stove off, gathering the empty cans of soup, packets of soy cheese, and containers of tofu sour cream, dumping them in the trash. "I'll check it out," he told Charles. "Safely. Responsibly. Yeah, kissing Janet was a dumb idea." His headache was leaving for the time being. Damned tumour.

"So glad you realise that _now_. Let's work on it sinking in a little bit earlier, okay?"

Jack was moving the creamy potatoes to a casserole dish as he shrugged. "Yeah, sure." Then he turned with a grin as Rachel pushed the outside door open. "Beautiful! Lunch is just about ready."

"Ugh, I'm starving," she grouched. "And I can't see my feet. Can you see my feet? Have I asked that today?"

Jack set the dish on the table and then hugged her, kissing her cheek. "I know, I can, and yes, you have. Hey, seven months on your birthday, though. Isn't that something?"

"I'll be amazed by procreational coincidences later. Give me your hand." She pressed his palm into her stomach and Jack grinned as he felt their daughter moving around.

"Hey, there, tootsie pop," he crooned to the baby. "Getting lots of good exercise, huh? You hungry yet?"

"She's always hungry. Tell her to get her foot out of my ribs."

Jack was pressing down on Rachel's stomach, completely absorbed with his wife and child. "Come on, honey, leave Mama alone." He helped Rachel to a chair and let Charles finish the food while he started dishing her up a plate. "So . . . uhm . . . Charles had an idea."

Rachel was eating as fast as Jack was dishing. "Mm?"

"Do you know what a doula is?" the blonde asked. Rachel gave her a blank look. "A doula is someone who gives non-medical support to mothers and infants in the childbirth process." She sighed when Rachel just blinked at her. "A maid, essentially. For the purpose of this explanation. If you need emotional or physical support during pregnancy, labour, or after the baby's born, if you need errands to be run, light housekeeping, breastfeeding support . . . a doula does all that."

"Sounds nice," Rachel said vaguely as Jack sat on the floor next to her and concentrated on making the baby jump around. "Oof, gentle, Jack. What about a doula?"

"I _am_ a doula," Charles stated, "and I can take a man out at five hundred yards."

"What's that got to do with being a doula?"

Charles sat across from Rachel and crossed her arms on the table. "Listen to me very carefully, Rachel. With that murderer still on the loose, we're all concerned about you and the baby. He's trying to get to Jack, and obviously he's trying through you and women who look like you."

Rachel reached for the apricot juice Jack had set out. "So, what, you want to be my bodyguard maid nanny?"

The other woman sat back with a nod. "Yeah, I do, and I'm not taking no for an answer."

"Please?" Jack whispered against her stomach.

"You know what? This is all a little too convenient. When did you get the training you'd need, huh?" Rachel demanded.

"As soon as I heard you were pregnant," was the dry response.

Rachel blinked. "Oh. Why didn't you tell me then?"

"Because you wouldn't have wanted my help then. But you want it now."

"Well . . ." She looked down at Jack, resting his forehead against her stomach and talking quietly to the baby, who had removed her foot from Rachel's rib like a good girl. Rachel sighed. "Okay. Fine. But this doesn't get you out of childbirth classes, Jack."

"Wouldn't miss 'em for the world," he said simply. The screen door rustled and there was a faint "Ja-Ja-Ja-Ja" from outside. Jack immediately crawled toward the door with a huge grin on his face. "Baby! What are you doing out there all by yourself?" He reached up and pulled the screen door open, revealing a Mitzi-thing that had been banging its head against the door, trying to get in. She crawled to him with a giggle.

"Ja-Ja!"

Jack scooped her up and tickled her tummy. "Aw, that's my girl! That's my Mitzi-thing!" He scooted back to Rachel, leaning against her. "What do you want, ugly thing? Are you hungry? Want some potatoes? C'mere, we'll get you some ---"

"Jaaaack!" Susie banged through the door, followed by Janet, and the two girls tumbled to the floor as they fought over a seashell. "It's mine! Gimme!"

"_Hey_!" he hollered, feeling the baby kick the back of his head in surprise. Mitzi started whimpering and he rocked her a bit. "Knock it off! Come here, you two. What's going on?"

"Janet won't give me my seashell back!" Susie claimed as she crawled into Jack's lap and hugged his neck. "Make her give it back!"

"Oh, come on, there's lots of shells out there. Go get another one."

"I want _that_ one!"

Jack rolled his eyes as he gestured for Janet to give him the shell. She looked at him nervously and fidgeted. "Just give me the shell, Janet. Sit down." He patted the floor next to him and she sat. Jack put the arm holding the shell around her shoulders and looked closely at it. "Who found it first? Janet?"

"Susie did," the girl muttered.

"Then why didn't you give it back to her?"

"She's just gonna break it."

"I am not!"

"You break everything!"

"I do not!"

"Shut up, both of you." Jack reached up and set the shell on the table. "There. It's Rachel's shell now, since you can't share it. Happy birthday, love of my life."

"Ooh, a shell," Rachel mumbled through her food. "Just what I always wanted." Her hand was in his hair, rubbing his head and Jack grinned up at her.

Then he winced when Mitzi grabbed his hair and tugged as she giggled. "Ja-Ja!"

"Aaaaa, yes, Jack, that's me, let go of my hair! Ugh, you horrid thing." She giggled again, reacting to his tone of voice rather than his words, and Rachel pulled his hair out of her grasp. "Thanks, babe."

Tom poked his head in and grinned at the sight of Jack sitting on the floor with three kids in his embrace, leaning against his pregnant wife. "So when are you trying for number two?"

"What are you talking about, pig?"

"Number two. Second kid. 'Cause you can't keep mine."

"I don't _want_ your kid, pig, and there won't _be_ a number two." Still, Jack wasn't about to let the Mitzi-thing go, either. She was jabbering at him, then looked up when Tom leaned over her with a smile.

"Hey, Mitzi. How's my baby girl?"

"Da-da!" she squealed, her curls bouncing. Then she patted Jack's cheek. "Ja-Ja!"

"No, mo-ron, Mitzi. Mo-ron."

"Shut up," Jack grumbled at him. "What do you want?"

"Other than to make sure Mitzi's all right? Food. Come here, sweety, this moron probably has cooties."

"I gave them all to Rachel; that's why she's knocked up."

He got a swat on the head and guffawed. "Jack! Not in front of the kids!"

"Susie, boys have cooties," he went on as Tom picked Mitzi up. He stood up, too, and settled the little girl on his hip as she listened intently. "Don't go near them."

"But you're a boy, Jack," she pointed out.

He shrugged. "Yeah, well, I gave all my cooties to Rachel, remember?"

"Oh, okay."

"Have you decided on a name yet?" Tom asked as Helna and Hideki came in.

"Oh, yeah! I want to know!" the man gushed, rubbing his hands together as he practically salivated. Over the baby or Jack's cooking, it was hard to tell.

"Let's get everything outside and we'll tell you," Jack said firmly. "Here, help." They got everything transferred to the tables set up outside, which was the only way they could seat all ten people, plus Mitzi, comfortably. "Okay," Jack said loudly, "we've narrowed it down to two names: Ava Mirelle and Audrey Sophia."

"Those are awfully stuffy names," Bruce commented.

"Shut up," Charles and Jack said at the same time. He rolled his eyes.

"I think they're lovely," Helna put in. "If she looks anything like Rachel, she'll be beautiful, too."

"Why doesn't anyone ever mention _my_ looks?" Jack asked irritably. He got a lot of guilty faces. "I mean, it's not like these scars are genetic or anything. I was a heart-throb before . . ." He blinked and shook his head sharply as his vision tilted. "Before . . ."

Suddenly Rachel's arms were around him. "Jack?! Jack! Are you all right?"

He blinked up at her. "Huh?" He was on the ground, everyone peering down at him. "Yeah, I'm fine. What just happened?"

Rachel was almost in tears. "You passed out. Jack, you need to see a doctor about your headaches. I'm really worried, Jack."

He smiled; her tears were funny, for some reason. He reached up to pat her cheek. "Aw, it's all right, bunny. I feel just fine." He tried to sit up, but once more opened his eyes to worried faces. "All right, maybe I just need to rest." He heard sniffling and reached his hand out until he felt curly hair, then pulled Susie down next to him. "Let's take a nap, pumpkin, okay?"

"Don't go to sleep!" Rachel cried out. She had her phone out. "We need to get you to the hospital."

"_No_," Jack said firmly. "Just give me a minute, Rachel." He took the phone from her and had to think fast. "I'll call Dr. Morgenson later; when some of my medications stop working, they make me woozy like this."

"Which medications?" she asked nervously.

He smiled again and kissed the top of Susie's head. "Some of the lighter ones. No wonder I've been depressed lately." She breathed a sigh of relief that wasn't echoed by their friends from Gotham. "Hey, kiddo, get my food and feed me, huh?"

"Okay," Susie said with another sniffle. "Are you sure you'll be all right?"

He grinned widely at her. "I'm just fine, hon." Ten minutes later he was back at the table, under strict orders to take it easy for the rest of the day. The good thing about it, he mused later, was that he got to relax and Rachel got to do all the work. He'd even gotten a bit of a blow-job, which, considering Rachel hated giving them, was amazing. It was too bad she didn't like them, though . . . she was _damn_ good at them.

"Are you all right?" she asked quietly as she curled up next to him.

Jack turned slowly to help her get comfortable with the pregnancy pillow they'd gotten, rubbing her stomach. "Perfect," he whispered in her ear. "But _I'm_ supposed to pamper _you_ today."

She laughed. "You pamper me all the time, sweety. It's all right."

They were both barely conscious. "Happy birthday," Jack murmured. Rachel giggled softly, then they both drifted off.

***

A week later, Jack had just finished rubbing Rachel's legs in the bath. It was fun for both of them, and helped with the leg cramps she'd been getting, to boot.

He cleared his throat. "Hey, Tom invited me over for a few beers tonight. Some guy thing. Is that all right?"

She raised her eyebrows. "Sure. Will you be okay without me?"

He laughed as he stood and helped her up. "I think I'll make it." A few minutes later Rachel was on her hands and knees on the bed, crying out with pleasure as Jack thrust into her, and a few minutes after that she was bundled in blankets on the couch with a mug of hot cocoa and a book. Charles was in the kitchen, making her some soup, and she was smiling as Jack left.

The 7440 Club wasn't that far from Tom's place. It was as skeazy as he'd claimed it to be, and as he shoved his way through the crowd of tramps and bikers outside the door, his upper lip curled a little in disgust and he kept reminding himself that Rachel and the baby's safety was reason enough to be there. He kept to the wall as he made a round of the room, then a familiar laugh caught his attention and he turned to the bar, watched Veronica flash her black panties to the room as she crossed her legs, leaning back to bat her eyelashes at the tall man she was flirting with. He smirked a little and made his way over.

"What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?" he purred on her left. The woman almost jumped out of her skin and gaped at him. Jack's smirk got a little wider as he examined his fingernails.

"What the hell are _you_ doing here?" she stammered. "Rachel let you off your leash?"

He snorted. "She's having a night to herself. Two shots of Jack," he said as the bartender passed by. "What are you having?"

"Both shots are for you?" Veronica asked doubtfully. "Just a Bud." He nodded to the bartender and paid the man, then downed one of the shots as Veronica took a drink of her beer. "No, really, what are you doing here?"

"Nervous?" he asked her with a grin.

She raised her chin haughtily. "Never."

"Bad answer," he returned, leaning against the bar as his gaze travelled over her low-cut dress. "Never been here before, thought I'd check it out while I could still go out at night. Besides, Rachel's gotten real moody this last week. What are _you_ doing here? Isn't Jeff gonna worry?"

His eyes weren't the only ones roving. Veronica kept looking him up and down, from his black shirt to his jeans and boots, licking her lips before taking another drink. He'd turned her down once, and it appeared that she wasn't too keen on it happening again. She snorted, though, at the mention of her husband.

"He doesn't care where I go."

"Really," Jack murmured to himself as he downed his second shot. She was more interesting than he'd thought.

"Yeah, really," she said shortly. "You going to make fun of me now?"

"I was thinking of asking you to dance, actually." Jack straightened and covered her hand with his, gently stroking her fingers as he raised his eyebrows and smiled. Veronica looked at him for a moment, then smiled and curled her fingers into his. "This place seems a little low-class for you," he murmured in her ear once they were on the dance floor. The way she was holding him said that maybe she wasn't being held enough at home, and her next words confirmed that.

"It's the only place I can get any. Jeff doesn't want me."

"Why not?"

She sighed. "Because he's gay." That made Jack blink in surprise and Veronica snorted. "Yeah, he does everything he can to keep it a secret, but . . . why do you think he's such good friends with Bob?" She snorted. "Friends. Right." _Now_ her promiscuity made a lot of sense.

"Sorry to hear that," he murmured in her ear. Veronica shuddered a little and pressed her cheek to his. The song that was playing was perfect for dirty dancing and she was good at it, swaying her hips against his, one leg rubbing just right against his groin. Jack let his fingers curl against the skin of her back and felt her laugh softly. She gasped a little when he pulled her tighter against him, looking at him with wide eyes. "It's dangerous to be out alone these days, you know."

"Murderer's not after me," Veronica choked out as Jack rolled his hips into hers. "You left Rachel alone."

"A friend of ours is staying with us for a while," he told her. "Rachel's safe. It's dangerous to be here even without a murderer on the loose." His lips were against her neck, just below her ear, and Veronica's nails were digging into his back.

"I know everyone here," she groaned. "I didn't start out with money, you know."

"Tell me about it," Jack whispered.

"I . . . oh . . . grew up on the wrong side of the tracks. Mom left when I was five, Daddy drank a lot . . . didn't know how to raise a girl." She'd turned her head to kiss his neck as she spoke, making Jack shiver a little. "Married the first guy I could out of high school just to get out of the town I grew up in; we moved here, he ran off with a friend a couple of years later." Veronica tried to kiss his lips but Jack tilted his chin up, and she growled with frustration. "Jeff's wife had just left him, and I figured it would be a pretty stable relationship. I wasn't, oh God, I wasn't counting on him being a fag." Jack had lowered his head to her shoulder and was breathing heavily, ignoring what he'd seen of the bar's patrons, pretending they weren't there, filing it away for later.

"I need a drink," he muttered as the song ended, pulling away from her and heading back to the bar. Veronica followed on unsteady legs. "Same," he told the bartender. This time Jack downed both shots right after each other, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. "So, what, you hang out here at night?"

"Pretty much. No real reason to leave him, you know? He gets to keep his little secret, I have a place to stay . . ." She shrugged and grabbed his collar, pulling him close as Jack laughed a bit. "Why won't you kiss me?"

"I've seen all I need to see," he replied, disentangling himself none too gently. "You know every single person in this bar? Really?"

She looked around and nodded. "Yeah. Not too many tramps and bikers in the area, so they all congregate here; it's hard not to stand out when you're new." She'd moved her hands to his waist as he stood. "Jack . . ."

"Gotta run, love," he said with a grin. "I have a wife and kid to get back to." He left her there, not looking around as he headed for the door. She knew everyone, huh? _That_ was _so_ very _in_teresting.

***

Charles was sitting on the porch when he pulled up, and didn't say anything until he'd gotten to her.

"Tom's, huh?"

"Seventy-Four Forty Club," he corrected.

"There's lipstick on your neck."

His lips twisted and he rubbed at the marks. "That's nice. They were at the bar."

The woman wasn't looking happy as she stood up. "And you needed someone sucking on your neck to find this out?"

"If I looked distracted," Jack growled, "then they probably didn't think I saw them. Veronica knows them."

"The Johnson woman was there?" Charles pursed her lips thoughtfully. "This shit just gets better and better. Wash up and get to bed, Jack."

He snorted as she followed him inside. "He'll be here when I need him, right? I mean, I know Gotham needs to be babysat all the time, but your guys' little Justice Club or whatever you've got going can deal with it without him holding their hands, right?"

Charles took a moment in the downstairs bathroom to thoroughly scrub his neck and face. Then she sighed. "Yes, Jack, he'll be here. Just make it quick, all right? We don't need any more women going missing."

"I'll try," he said, then she pushed him to the stairs. Jack was glad to strip down and crawl into bed next to Rachel, wrapping his arms around her gently. She shifted a little in her sleep and sighed. He felt their daughter move a bit when he put his hand on her lower abdomen, and that made Jack smile. "Go to sleep," he whispered. "Daddy will keep you safe."


	19. Chapter 19

Rachel squealed with laughter as thunder crashed, making both her and little Ava jump. She got a kick in the ribs and rubbed her stomach, trying to creep through the living room without Jack noticing. There was just enough light from the fire to keep her from bumping into things, but the dancing shadows on the wall provided good cover for her husband as he stalked her. The wind howled around the house, disguising any tell-tale footsteps. She'd made it to the front door when strong arms wrapped around her.

"Where are _you_ going?" Jack growled in her ear.

Rachel didn't answer because he was too busy groping her to notice a reply; she just gasped and giggled, wiggling back against him as he clenched his teeth with a short groan. He'd been going out more often at night the past week, and always wanted some sort of intimate contact before he left. It helped to make Rachel, whose body had swollen to match her breasts, feel like she was still gorgeous in his eyes. It was _certainly_ hard to claim that he didn't want her when he was dry-humping her like that, too.

"On the couch, woman."

Rachel laughed again and turned halfway in his embrace, one hand raising to his cheek and guiding his lips to hers. Jack was taking her clothes off as quickly as he could despite the distraction her breasts caused, his hands shaking so badly that she needed to help him with the buttons of her blouse. His own shirt hung open over his chest. Rachel fumbled with his belt and pants and pushed them to his knees as he sat back on the couch. Jack had found that if he pressed into her stomach just right while they were having sex, he could get Ava to jump in a sort of counter-rhythm, which he had yet to get tired of. Rachel didn't mind; feeling Ava kick and turn comforted her fears of a miscarriage, which let her enjoy her pregnancy more.

Five minutes later she was drawing blood as she raked her nails down Jack's chest in response to a particularly hard slap to the rear he'd given her, mumbling incoherently as she trembled and rested her forehead against his shoulder. He tightened his arms around her back and rocked her from side to side.

"Charles is gonna be back any minute," he whispered after a while. "You okay?"

"Do you have to go?" Rachel asked.

"I told them I'd come out tonight. I thought you wanted me to be more social, bunny."

"I did," she mumbled. Jack sighed as he ran his fingers through her hair, which had gotten thicker the past month or so. "I just . . . get lonely without you."

"I won't be long, I promise. Midnight at the latest, all right?"

She made a face as he helped her to stand. "I'll be asleep by then."

Jack needed to go. They'd spent the day shopping for things for Ava with Helna and Charles' help, then decorating Ava's room, and he was practically jumping out of his skin with the need to be away from reminders of what he was about to lose. He kissed Rachel firmly as he pulled his pants up, then helped her put her clothes back on.

"Babe, I promise, I won't be that long. Charles will be here with you."

Rachel rubbed her arms and leaned into him. "Why are you going out so much all of a sudden?"

"'Cause I keep getting invited. It's not every night, Rachel." He hugged her as Charles pulled into the driveway, tilting her chin up to kiss her.

She still didn't look happy, but kissed him back. "Eleven?"

Jack chuckled. "Eleven," he promised. "I'll wake you up when I get in."

There was a knock at the door. "You two decent?"

"You just missed the fun," he called back. "Come on in."

Charles pushed the door open with a roll of her eyes, two bags of groceries in her arms. "Where are _you_ off to, bub?"

Rachel had sat back down, fanning herself, and therefore didn't see him narrow his eyes at Charles. "Out. Got an eleven o'clock curfew."

He grabbed his keys and was pushing past her when she grabbed his elbow. "You keep your dick in your pants and that whore off of you," Charles murmured firmly. "Do you understand me?"

Jack snorted with laughter as he walked down the steps. "See ya later."

Veronica had a Bud and two shots in front of her when he walked into the 7440. He placed one hand on her shoulder and grabbed one of the shots with his other hand, squeezing as he downed it.

"Am I getting predictable?"

"Just thought you might show up tonight," she replied as she turned to him with a smile. She'd exchanged her usual form-fitting tops for something looser and v-necked, and Jack made sure she knew he was appreciating the cleavage it framed as he smirked. "Though I was thinking you might not show."

"Yeah, I was having sex." She hated it when he mentioned Rachel, therefore Jack mentioned her on a semi-regular basis. Not too often, though; Veronica was his main source of information for the patrons of the 7440 and he couldn't risk alienating her that much. Then again, he mused as her eyes wandered over him, a pair of particularly tight pants and a flash of chest was generally enough to have her salivating over him once again. "Haven't been telling tales, have you?"

"To who? Anita and Maureen? We don't talk much, and they haven't asked me about you. Why are you so fixated on those two?"

He downed the second shot and cracked his neck. "Find out where they're staying?"

Veronica heaved a disgusted sigh and Jack rested his hand on her upper thigh, rubbing his thumb in a slow circle on her skin. She sighed with pleasure. "Somewhere near Folsom."

"That's an hour away."

She shrugged and watched his lips. "That's what they were saying the other night. Bit far to get some pussy, huh?"

"The only pussy I want is back at home," he replied somewhat distractedly. The subjects of their conversation had just walked in. They'd changed their hair colour, but he'd recognise them anywhere, knew that self-satisfied grin on Maury's face. Jack stepped closer to Veronica, resting his hands on either thigh as he pulled her against him. Veronica's blue eyes unfocused a bit and her lips parted, her tongue sliding over them.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down to whisper in his ear, "What about a blow-job?" Her tongue flicked against his ear and Jack shivered as his dick sat up and took notice.

He cupped her face in his hands and hovered his mouth above hers, his smirk never fading. "What about one?" The two were wandering around the bar slowly, watching every one carefully. They weren't looking for any one in particular, but no one escaped their notice.

"Don't fuck around with me, Jack," Veronica growled. She curled her hands around his wrists and her legs around his. "I'll take you any way I can get you."

That had him in a fit of quiet laughter for a moment. Then Jack cleared his throat and arched his eyebrows at her. "Are you always such a desperate whore?"

She dug her nails into the delicate skin on the insides of his wrists and Jack hissed with pleasure. Her eyes flashed with anger and maybe a little self-loathing; he enjoyed the sight of them. "You stupid son of a ---"

The two were getting closer and Jack cut her off with a kiss, ignoring every bit of advice he'd given Janet as he forced his tongue into Veronica's mouth. It didn't matter; Veronica groaned into the kiss and returned it, her legs tightening around his as she clutched at him, her hands in his hair and along his back. He felt the air of their passage, smelled that awful perfume Maury favoured, then pulled back to nibble at Veronica's ear as incoherent rage boiled up behind his eyes.

"I think I'll take you up on that offer," he whispered huskily. He couldn't force their hand tonight; if Rachel went into labour at this point, he didn't like the odds of Ava surviving. His baby girl needed more time. He could bide his own time and be patient, he just needed a little . . . distraction.

His distraction had stood up and taken his hand, pulling him toward a set of stairs at the back of the bar with a triumphant grin on her face. "Jimmy has a room upstairs he lets me stay in overnight if I need to," she explained.

"Don't give a fuck," he muttered. "All I want is a blow-job, then I'm going home." Folsom. Near Folsom. Raoul's friends had contacts there; he'd get them on it as soon as he got back. Veronica pulled him into a room and locked the door, shrieking softly when Jack bent down and bit her neck.

"Ow! You asshole! Are you this abusive with Rachel?!"

"Of course not; I actually _like_ Rachel," he growled as he pulled her skirt up around her hips, slipping his fingers under her panties. She was already plenty wet and his mouth started watering, but Jack clenched his jaw before he kissed her again, not trying to be gentle as he bit at her lips. He liked the way Veronica whined in both pain and pleasure as she thrust her hips against his hand, gasping his name in a way he could only remember two women ever saying it. He moved his mouth down her neck to give her a few hickeys just for the hell of it, his mind on the two people downstairs as he continued fingering her. He was going to kill them himself. No other course of action would ensure that his family would stay safe.

"Oh, Christ, _Jack_!" Veronica squealed as she came, throwing her head back and cracking it against the door. He laughed against her breast, but she didn't notice. She was too busy whimpering, and even though the pitch of her voice irritated him, old habits died hard and Jack didn't let her go until she stopped reacting to his touch. "Oh, fuck. _Fuck_."

Jack let her push him back toward the bed, undoing his pants as they went. "Got condoms?"

He got another disgusted sigh and even got an eye roll. "In the dresser. I swear, I'm clean."

"Yeah, I don't trust you," he grunted as his pants hit the floor. He pointed to the dresser and slapped Veronica's ass when she turned to it in a huff. That earned him another soft shriek and he dodged the slap she sent toward him, flopping onto his back as he laughed and started stroking himself. Then Veronica's hand covered his and he let her take over, propping himself up slightly on his elbows so he could watch. Rachel was more favourable towards hand-jobs than blow-jobs, and while he preferred her over Veronica, he had to admit that she knew what she was doing. Jack watched her pointedly as he let out an appreciative grunt, reaching out to trail his fingers down her cheek while she put the condom on him. Then she lowered her mouth to him and after a moment his eyes rolled back in his head as he panted. "Shit . . ."

That made Veronica laugh as he fisted his hands in her hair to set the rhythm that he wanted. If he lay back and kept his eyes closed, he could almost pretend it was Rachel's mouth on him, Rachel's hands on his body. Jack groaned as he pulled at Veronica's hair right before he climaxed, trying to erase everything from his mind. It was a moment before he caught his breath, a moment that Veronica took to stretch out next to him with a satisfied smile. She'd just started trailing her hand along his chest when he opened his eyes and sat up.

"Hey . . . where are you going?" Jack didn't look back at her as he took the condom off and pulled his pants up, heading to the bathroom to throw it away and wash as much of her scent off of him as he could without a shower. Veronica appeared in the doorway behind him, smoothing her hair down. "What are you doing?"

"Going home," he muttered as he scrubbed at his hands and face with hot, soapy water.

She snorted and wrapped her arms around his waist, but Jack shoved her back. "What the hell?"

"I told you," he snarled at her, "I wanted a blow-job, then I was going home. I got what I wanted, and now I'm leaving."

She was staring at him in disbelief. "So that's it, huh?"

"Yeah, that's it." He opened the door and looked back at her. "You give good head. See ya around."

Ten minutes later he was pulling up to the house, intent on a hot shower and some quiet time with Rachel. Tom's police car was there, however, and a cold pit formed in Jack's stomach as he parked and leapt out of the car, running up the steps and throwing the front door open.

"Rachel?" he called.

"Oh, thank God you're back! You forgot your phone, I was so worried . . ." Rachel came out of the dining room and threw her arms around him. There were tears running down her face and Jack held her tightly, weak in the knees with relief. He'd thought for one terrifying moment that she'd disappeared, that he'd let her get kidnapped . . .

Then he saw Janet and Susie sitting on the couch, Tom standing behind them. The man was in uniform and both girls were in tears, and Jack closed his eyes against the sight.

"Mary?" he whispered softly.

Rachel's shoulders shook. "She never made it home today." Then she sniffed at his shirt. "You smell like ---"

"Yeah, someone got a bit too friendly." He stepped away from her, still holding her hand as he walked over to the girls and knelt down. Susie threw her arms around him, bursting into fresh tears. "Hey, baby . . ."

"Mommy's missing!" the girl wailed. Jack hugged her tightly and looked up at Tom.

"Mary left work to pick the girls up after school, but never made it," he said quietly. Rachel sat next to Janet and put her arm around the girl's shoulder. "No one's heard from her since." And Maury had looked so _pleased_ with himself. Jack cursed under his breath and then pressed a kiss to Susie's cheek.

"Hey, we'll find your mom, Susie, don't worry. She probably got lost. Wanna stay here tonight?" She was still sobbing, nodding her head, and Jack got up to walk her around the living room. His head felt like it was going to explode with pain. He needed to wait. The tumour couldn't kill him just yet. "Okay, you wanna stay in Ava's room? It's right across from me and Rachel." She nodded, barely coherent, and Jack held her close until she'd fallen asleep. Tom had been talking with Rachel and Janet in the meantime, and he took the opportunity to steal upstairs. He pulled out some sleeping pads and lay them in Ava's newly-decorated room, put Susie on them and then got her some blankets before changing his outfit and heading back downstairs. "Where's Charles? What happened?"

"She's at the station; I just came over to drop the girls off. And Mary just . . . disappeared," Tom said with a sigh. "She's not at any of the bars in town, she's not at home . . ."

Jack sat between Rachel and Janet and put his arms around both of them, staring up at Tom. "All right. We'll be fine here."

"Are you sure?" Tom asked. He was clearly anxious to get back to Helna and Mitzi.

"I'll kill anyone who tries to touch these women," Jack stated. "Trust me, Tom."

His friend nodded. "I'll send Charles back."

"Sure." He got up long enough to lock the door once Tom left, then grabbed his phone from the mantle and flipped it open. A few rings later Hideki's sleepy voice answered.

"Hmm?"

"It's Jack. Give me Raoul."

"Huh? It's almost eleven, Jack."

"And Mary Mills is missing. Put Raoul on."

There was rustling, then Raoul's equally sleepy baritone came on the line. "What happened? Are you all right?"

"We're fine," Jack said shortly. "Mary Mills is missing, though. I need your contacts in Folsom." He motioned for an anxious Rachel to stay with Janet as he went back upstairs to talk in private and described Maury and Anita's new looks to Raoul. "Get them on this _now_ Raoul, because I can't last much longer."

"I'll call them right now. Do I need to send . . .?"

"Not yet. I don't need him skulking around right now. Charles will do for the time being, but have him send someone for Rachel."

"If you're sure."

"I'm sure," Jack whispered as he turned to face his wife. She was watching him with wide eyes and he wanted to scream. "Call me tomorrow." Then he hung up and just looked at her.

"You knew," she whispered. "All this time, you knew who was killing those women."

"You're going to Gotham," Jack replied. "Bruce will send someone for you, and until they get here you're not going anywhe ---" Her palm connected with his face and his head snapped to the side. Jack sighed and rubbed his cheek. "Rachel ---"

"You knew!" she almost screamed. She was furious. "And you didn't say a damned thing! You let everyone think . . . you let those women . . . what the hell is _wrong_ with you, Jack?!"

"And what would have happened if I'd said something when I guessed it was them, huh?" he demanded, catching her hand when she tried to slap him again. "Do _not_ hit me again, Rachel. What would have happened? I could have given a description, sure, and they would have split completely, or laid low for a while. Oh, sort of what happened the last few months?"

"Let me go, Jack," Rachel snapped, trying to pull out of his grasp as she cried.

He wasn't letting go. "Listen to me, Rachel," he urged. "Just listen. I had Hideki and Raoul track them down in Gotham. They've been planning this for a long time, baby. A _long_ time. We think it's a mob contract ---"

"And when the hell were you going to tell _me_ about all of this?!" Rachel yelled, her green eyes burning with anger. "When you were going to let your _wife_ know?!"

"Hopefully never!" he yelled back. "And that's why you're going to Gotham, so you can be safe!"

"And where will _you_ be?" she demanded. "Planning on playing vigilante for a while? You can't do that Jack, you know you can't! You know _exactly why_ you can't do that!" Then she doubled over with a groan and Jack's heart stopped. "Oh, God . . ."

"Rachel?! What's wrong, Rachel?" Jack helped her to the bed and knelt next to her, placing his hands over hers on her stomach and feeling their baby kicking frantically. There were tears running down her face as she sobbed. "Rachel, baby, is Ava . . .?" No. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. Not yet.

"Water," Rachel gasped through her tears. Jack was up in a flash, pushing past Susie and Janet as they huddled in the doorway, getting her a drink from the bathroom.

"Here you go," Jack said softly, sitting next to Rachel and holding her against him as he tipped the cup to her lips. "Talk to me, Rachel. What's wrong? Should we go to the hospital?" He stared between her and her stomach, pressing his palms to it in the vague hope of keeping Ava inside where the baby belonged.

Rachel waved his questions away and started taking deep breaths. She was breathing easier after a couple of minutes. "I'm . . . I'm all right," she croaked out, resting her head on Jack's shoulder and closing her eyes. "We're fine."

"I'm sorry," Jack whispered as he kissed her forehead and hugged her, rubbing her stomach with one hand. "I'm so sorry, Rachel. Are you sure you two are okay?"

"I'm sure," Rachel whispered back. "She doesn't like us yelling at each other."

"Something we have in common," Jack replied as he started shaking.

"I just need to sleep. Please, Jack . . . don't make me leave you. I can't lose you . . ."

He settled her in the bed and tucked her in, making her as comfortable as possible. Then Jack kissed her cheek. "We'll talk about it later. You're sure . . .?"

Rachel held his hand tightly. "I love you, Jack."

"That doesn't do me any good if you and Ava get hurt," he choked out, wiping at his face. He turned to Janet and Susie, both looking terrified, and jerked his head toward Rachel. "In bed, you two." They didn't need any more prodding, scrambling under the covers as carefully as they could, trembling. "Now look," Jack went on as Rachel's grip on his hand relaxed. She was still breathing, so she'd just fallen asleep. His heart started beating again. "You're staying here until we find Mary. I'll fix you up a real bed in Ava's room tomorrow, but for tonight, you'll stay in here. Charles should be back soon, and she's a crack shot. That means she'll shoot all the bad guys," he said when Susie looked confused. All three got a kiss on the forehead. "I'll be right downstairs if you need me."

"Is Mommy gonna be okay?" Susie whispered.

"Don't worry," Jack said as he gave her another kiss. "We'll find her. Just go to sleep, Susie." He didn't meet Janet's gaze as he stood up and walked out of the room.

*****

**A/N:** This story will be getting darker and darker; I'm not all happy-fluffy-bunnies, you know. Just . . . so you know. And sorry about the long time between updates. ^.^ My review monkeys love me, right? . . . Right?


	20. Chapter 20

Mary had been missing for two and a half weeks. Rachel had refused to go back to Gotham. She'd gotten Janet and Susie placed in their custody for the time being, Charles had moved to the couch, and the sisters had moved in to the downstairs bedroom. More often, though, Susie ended up between Jack and Rachel. That meant his household had exploded from two and a half people to five and a half in less than a month, and he was having a little trouble adjusting.

"What's the capital of Pennsylvania?" Janet called from the dining room. Rachel had gotten them in some home study program, which meant he was stuck with them all day long.

"Harrisburg," he called back. He was on the couch, arms crossed over his chest as he concentrated on the news. Susie was playing with her Barbies behind him, Charles was making lunch in the kitchen, and Rachel was at work. He knew Rachel was at work, because he called her every half hour. She let him because she knew she was lucky to not be locked up in Wayne Manor, knew that she was lucky he was allowing her out of his sight.

"When's Mommy coming home?" Susie asked as she leaned over the back of the couch. "Will she be back in time for Halloween?"

Jack sighed and leaned forward, cracking his neck and sighing. They had eleven days until Halloween. He rubbed the stubble on his chin with a frown. "I don't know, Susie. She'll be back as soon as she can." Janet walked past to get the calculator she'd left on the mantle and Jack's eyes followed her, sliding up her bare legs until they disappeared under the skirt she was wearing. It hit her at mid-thigh and hugged her curves just enough to tease. Jack closed his eyes tightly until she'd gone back to her homework, then clenched his fists and stood up.

"Where are you going, Jack?"

"Out, kid. I'll bring you back some candy."

That settled Susie down as Charles came out with a tray of sandwiches, following him to the door. "Don't go," she murmured.

Janet's legs flashed through his mind and he shook his head quickly. "You either let me go into town," he told Charles, "or I take Janet upstairs and fuck her. Your choice." It disgusted him; not that he could even think about having sex with Janet, but that the thought was less and less disturbing, and more and more appealing.

"You're insane, Jack."

"Getting there." He glanced inside, then raised a hand to keep Charles quiet. "Mary's still alive."

That got her attention and her eyebrows went up. "How do you know?"

"Because no one's found her body yet; they're not exactly being discreet about dumping them any more. They're waiting to see what I do, want me as tense as possible. I just need to stay in control until I find them."

"And an affair with the Johnson woman will help you . . . how? This is stupid, Jack. Bruce could find them quicker ---"

"And then what?" Jack whispered, starting to tremble. "I need to get rid of him once and for all."

"Who? Bruce?"

He rolled his eyes. "No. I'm leaving."

She was following him to the car. "Would you just talk to me, Jack? You don't need to do this all by yourself. Rachel and Ava are depending on you to be there for them."

"Do _not_ talk to me about my wife and child," he growled, yanking the car door open.

"You can't even say their names any more. I agreed to help you, Jack, but I didn't agree to do _this_."

"I'm going to go check on her. Get some lunch with her, maybe."

"Does it help your conscience to not say Rachel's name before you go off to fuck another woman?"

"Rachel _is_ my conscience. I'm going to check on her." He left Charles staring after him, heart pounding as he drove to Veronica's. Better to be abusive toward her than toward Rachel. Veronica would take it, no question; she expected him to be rough, she didn't know how gently he treated Rachel. Just as long as she was screaming his name by the end of it, he could treat Veronica however he wanted to.

She answered the fourth time he pounded on the door. "Jack? What the hell are you ---"

Jack shoved his way inside and kissed her. It was the second time he'd put his lips on her and Veronica grabbed at his shoulders, melting against him.

"Where are they?" he growled when he pulled away.

"Who?" she panted. "Why are you here?" He was pulling her blouse out of her pants, biting her neck. "Oh, God, Jack . . ."

"Anita and Maureen. Where are they staying? I need a more specific area than 'around Folsom.' Tell me." He threw her shirt to the side and then stripped his own off before grabbing her breasts. "Where are they?"

"Christ, Jack, I don't know. They won't tell me, and it's not like I have them over to tea." She twisted her arm behind her to unhook her bra, letting it drop to the floor, then started tugging at his jeans as Jack pulled her skirt up.

"You're fucking useless." He bit down on her lower lip and she slapped him, so he slapped her back. "_Don't_ hit me. Now shut the fuck up."

It wasn't rape. It was just very rough, domineering sex that Veronica wasn't quite ready for. Her whines of pain and her fists hitting his back stopped after a few thrusts, then she was wrapping both legs around his waist and kissing him. Jack hated the way she tasted, hated the way she felt around him, hated that he was too far gone to run back to his wife and baby girl. Veronica was louder and more high-pitched than Rachel was; the sound made his head hurt even worse. He had to get Mary back. His girls . . . no, not his. They weren't his. They needed their mother, he needed his wife, his wife who was about to _be_ a mother . . .

"Rachel," he whispered.

Veronica pulled his head back by his hair and almost spit in his face. "Don't you _dare_ say her name when you're with me!"

He groaned at the pain and moved one hand to the small of her back, the other still digging into her thigh. "Rachel . . ."

"I hate you," Veronica snapped, pushing at his chest. "Let me go!"

"What did you think was going to happen?" Jack grunted in her ear as he caught her hands and held them above her head, not slowing down one bit. "Did you think I was going to run off with you? Look at me. Look at me," he snapped, grabbing her chin with his other hand and forcing her to make eye contact. There were tears in her blue eyes and she wasn't enjoying this any more, and Jack didn't give a damn. "Did you think I _cared_ about you? That I could, _mm_, ride off into the sunset with you and abandon the only people I love?"

"Let me go," she whispered harshly, still trying to struggle. "You're hurting me."

Jack pressed his lips to her neck and panted. "Just . . . one . . . moment . . ." He shuddered and bit back a groan. He took a moment to catch his breath, then stepped away from Veronica and let her drop to the floor, pulling his pants up. She stared up at him with loathing in her eyes, but there was still desire lurking on her face and he snorted. "I need a shower."

"You're just going to barge in to my home," Veronica hissed as she scrambled up, "fuck me, then use my shower and leave?"

"Uh . . . yeah, that's about what I'd planned on." Jack pushed her away from him. "Do you know what the murderer wants?"

She followed him upstairs and into the bathroom, pulling her blouse back on. "No, tell me." Her voice was oozing sarcasm.

"He wants the Joker back. Wants me to lose control, go back to Gotham, and . . . well, I'm not too sure what then, but they sure as hell don't want Jack." He turned the shower on, stripped, and got in. "I'm uh, not stopping you from getting in with me. So what does he do? He starts killing people. Hey, no problem. I don't care about those women. They're just objects to me. Things. So he puts smiles on their faces," and Jack pulled the shower curtain to the side to flash her a grin, "to make sure he has my attention. Only goes after women who resemble my wife. See, he's trying to use my weaknesses against me, what few I have. You getting in or not?"

Veronica sighed and got undressed, and Jack waited until she'd joined him before continuing. "Now, he's not completely dense, so he's figured out I've got a soft spot for Mary's girls. So now, Mary's missing. He'll probably try for Rachel next."

"And why aren't you telling this to the police?"

Jack had worked shampoo into his hair and rinsed it out, then shook his head like a dog. "Because I don't trust the police. Tom, sure, because he knows that if he double-crosses me, I'll take Helna and Mitzi and he won't _want_ to know what I do to that baby, then I'll kill Helna, then him."

Veronica was pale. "What would you do to Mitzi?"

Jack looked at her with earnest brown eyes. "Not a damned thing. I'd kill most anyone who tried to hurt her, too. But _he_ wouldn't know that, and that's the point. But I _will_ kill _you_, darling, if you utter one word of any of this to any one. What I'm telling you now, our little affair . . . if one word of it gets out, I'm coming after _you_. Is that clear?" He took her chin again and raised Jeff's straight razor to her lips, tugging a little at her cheek with it. "Is it? Sweety?"

Her situation was just sinking in and Veronica's eyes widened again. His tone had been so casual, his movements so natural, that until she nicked her tongue on the razor, she hadn't quite realised what he was doing. He was smiling beatifically the whole time, just having a pleasant conversation. She nodded, small, quick jerks of her head as a whimper forced its way out of her throat.

Jack let her go and kissed her, keeping the razor flush against her neck as he put his other hand between her legs. She whined again and tried to shy away, but he shushed her and kissed her again. "It's okay, Veronica . . . it's all right . . . I'm not going to hurt you just for the hell of it." Well, not yet. "You just need to do what I tell you. You've got a lot of free time on your hands, sweet cheeks, more than I do these days. I need you to find out exactly where those two bitches are staying. Can you do that for me?"

"Please, let me go," Veronica whispered. She was crying, now, too terrified to move.

"Tell me you'll find them," Jack pressed. Her body wasn't too terrified to react to his touch, though, and he purred. "Tell me."

"Okay," she sobbed. "I'll find them. Please don't hurt me."

That made him giggle. "Wasn't planning on _hurting_ you," he said as he sank to his knees, grinning up at her. "I mean, unless I've got the tongue of a cat." He leaned forward and practically skipped over yet another line he'd sworn he wouldn't cross, licking and sucking at Veronica and hoping he died. He couldn't begin to excuse his behaviour and so he didn't, but that didn't mean he liked it . . . except that he did like it. He loved having this woman in the palm of his hand, willing to do almost anything he wanted her to do just so long as he gave her some semblance of affection. She was pulling at his hair again, holding his head in place, gasping some name that he only vaguely recognised. Then she was hollering and thrashing in his grasp and as soon as she calmed down he stood up, turning to grab the mouthwash she kept in the shower and taking a gulp of it. He needed her taste out of his mouth. Five minutes later he was leaving the house; Veronica had disappeared and he hoped he didn't see her again for a long time.

He drove straight to the law offices and barged in; her secretary looked up in surprise as he stalked toward her office door.

"Ah, Mr. Dawes, Mrs. Dawes isn't in right now . . ."

He stopped as he was reaching for the handle, a shudder running through him. "Where is she?"

"She's at the courthouse. Ah, the Jenkins case?"

He cursed under his breath and turned to the woman. "When will she be back?"

"About an hour, I think." Another curse and he turned around to leave. "Should I tell her you stopped by, Mr. Dawes?"

Who was she talking to? Oh, him. Right. "I don't care," he said as he walked out the door. He needed Rachel, or else he'd go right back to Veronica and bang her again. Maybe kill her. No, she'd be too boring to kill. Maybe he'd hijack the Mitzi-thing instead, take it and the girls to the park for a while. His girls had been cooped up in the house since they'd moved in. Surely they needed the air, right? He was home before he knew it and pushing the front door open.

"Janet! Susie!" They weren't downstairs and he leaned into the stairwell doorway, banging on the wall. "Hey!"

"They're outside, Jack," Charlie said from the laundry room.

"Why the hell aren't you out there with them?"

"Because I've got them wired with tracking devices that will let me know if they leave the immediate area. I'm not an idiot. Unlike you."

"You could have just let that last bit be implied, you know."

"Oh, but I wanted to make sure you didn't miss it."

"Kinda hard _not_ to," Jack said in a sing-song voice as he walked out the kitchen door and raised his cupped hands to his mouth. "_Janet_! _Susie_! _Get over here_!"

They came running up a moment later, hair flying in the breeze, panting.

"Is Mommy back?!" Susie asked, throwing herself at him.

Jack picked her up and spun her around before settling her on his hip. "Nope. We're going to the park. Come on!"

"Why are we going to the _park_?" Janet asked.

He looked back at her with a frown. "Because . . . why not? You've been stuck inside the past two weeks, I thought you might want some fresh air."

He got a teenaged sigh. "We go outside a lot, Jack. We're there right now?"

Jack rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Come on, we're going to the park anyway. Don't argue with me, Janet. Don't your friends hang out at the park?"

"They won't talk to me," she muttered as she climbed in the car. "They think . . . they think _their_ parents will go missing if they do."

Jack buckled Susie in and scratched the back of his head. "Well, they're idiots. Hungry? I'll buy us lunch."

"Charles fed us after you left. Why are you so social all of a sudden?"

Jack shot her a stern look, but Janet was staring out the window. "Don't talk to me like that, Janet. If you've noticed, I'm sort of hit-and-miss when it comes to being sociable. Plus, you two are really my only company during the day, and Rachel's generally too tired to do anything but sleep when she gets home."

"_I_ want to go to the park," Susie said nervously. "Are we still going?"

"Do you see me driving?" he asked in return, flashing her a grin in the rear-view mirror. "Of course we're still going."

"Will Rachel be there, too?"

"She's busy right now, sweety."

Susie thought for a moment, then brightened. "Is she having Ava? Is that where she is?"

"Shit, I _hope_ not. No, Ava's still too tiny to come out yet. Rachel's just working. If Ava's ready to come out when Rachel's at work, she'd call me."

"And then you'd call me, right?"

Jack laughed and nodded. "Right, sweet tea, I'd call you first."

Susie was delighted. "And I'll be able to hold Ava, right? Can I hold her first?"

"No, Rachel gets to hold her first, then I get to hold her. But you can hold her when the doctors say it's okay for other people to hold her, all right?"

"Before anyone, right? Before Janet?"

"Oh, please," her older sister muttered.

"Of course you can hold her before Janet," Jack promised. "You'll be the best little big sister in the world." It made Susie laugh with delight.

***

They'd been at the park for half an hour when Jack looked up and saw the two women on the swings, smirking at him. He gave the tire swing an extra-hard shove, which made both girls shriek.

"Stay here, girls. I'll be right back." They didn't move when he walked toward them, and Jack was no longer having fun. "Hanging out in broad daylight's more balls than you usually have, Maury."

The man snorted, still grinning at him. "You're quite the family man these days, _Jaaaack_."

"Why don't you tell me what you want?"

Maury twirled some hair around his finger coyly. "You, darling. We've always only wanted you." He waved his hand at Jack dismissively. "Not this, this façade you've got going on right now, no. We want the _real_ you, honey. Mob's got big plans for Gotham, see. The Justice League is getting way out of hand, and they figure the only one with enough cajones to bring them down is the Joker." He smoothed his skirt as Jack shifted so he could keep an eye on the girls, as well. "And oh, how many women have you let die?"

"Don't know, don't care. You don't want the Joker to come back, Maury. You think what happened last time was bad? He'd be out for vengeance this time, and you're number one on the shit list right now. _No one_ in Gotham would survive." Jack crouched down and peered up at Anita. "What's in it for you, Bentley?"

"Just doing my job," she replied.

"Where's Mary Mills?"

She blinked at him. "Who?"

"You know who I'm talking about. She's been missing for two and half weeks."

"Oh, her. She's alive, for now. You're going to need to come back to Gotham with us if you want her to stay that way."

He snorted and watched Susie climb off the tire swing and stagger for a moment, dizzy. "Mob couldn't handle him last time. They're making a huge mistake."

"They're taking their chances." She was kicking her legs like a little girl, tilting back in the swing. "You've made this easy, Jack. You've got a wife, who's about to pop. You've got these two brats, who adore you. Who else do you care about? The police chief's wife? You spend a lot of time fucking her."

"Blow-jobs aren't sex."

"Rachel'd see it differently."

That made him laugh. "Are you threatening to tell Rachel that I've been screwing around with Veronica? Is that supposed to scare me into coming back to Gotham?" Actually . . . if Rachel found out, she might leave. She'd go to her mother's place, or maybe hole up with Wayne. Wasn't a bad idea. "Making that woman suck me off doesn't count as a relationship, I hope you realise. Well, maybe Maury doesn't, but you ought to."

"With a pregnant wife at home, too." Anita shook her head and sighed sadly. "What a shame."

"Isn't it just." He stood up. "So what's this little chat about?"

"We thought, since you weren't paying attention to our little messages," Maury cooed, "that we'd ask you nicely to come with us."

"Right. Let me just pack up, huh?" Jack rolled his eyes. "I'm going to kill both of you, and I'm going to enjoy it."

"We'll see you later," Anita called as he turned and walked back to his girls.


	21. Chapter 21

He'd been rubbing his scars all afternoon. Rachel finally reached out and covered his hand, and Jack looked at her in surprise. He'd been absent-minded the past few days, and she was worried.

"Are you all right, Jack?"

"Uh?" He dug his fingers into his left cheek, tugging at the scar tissue. "Yeah, I'm fine."

Rachel frowned. "You're not fine, Jack. What's wrong?"

"My . . . face just itches. That's all."

"How are your headaches?"

Jack slammed his fist onto the table. "Damn it, Rachel, I said I'm fine!" She jumped and so did Ava, kicking out in surprise. She hadn't expected him to react so angrily. "Would you get off my back about this?"

"Don't yell at me, Jack, I'm just worried about you." Rachel put her hands on his shoulders but he shoved them off with a growl. Ava kicked again and turned over, and Rachel rubbed her stomach soothingly. "You startled Ava."

His daughter moving normally distracted Jack, but this time he just held his head in his hands and snorted. "She'll get over it. Just shut up about my headaches, all right? They're no big deal."

Rachel sat across from Jack, the cold pit in her stomach getting just a little bigger. "Why are you lying to me, Jack?" she asked softly.

He rolled his eyes up to look at her darkly. "I'm not lying."

"Yes, you are. You're lying about your headaches, you're lying about who you go see at night . . ." She was trying not to cry, hoping that she was wrong, that it was just her being over-sensitive. Jack wasn't used to being around so many people all the time, after all, and she barely had any energy at all these days to devote to him.

"I come back, don't I?" he muttered.

Rachel covered her mouth to keep from sobbing out loud. "That's not the point," she whispered. "Who are you going to see?" He wasn't seeing someone else. He couldn't be. No matter how much stress Jack was under, he'd never cross that line.

He was quiet for a long time. Finally, "7440 Club."

"What?"

"The 7440 Club," Jack repeated a little too loudly. "That's where I go at night."

"Why?" Rachel asked. She couldn't believe that he'd rather be in a dingy bar than with her.

"'Cause I can drink and get into a fight there. What, you'd rather I stay home and yell at you and the girls?"

"No, I wouldn't. I just . . . why couldn't you just _tell_ me that's where you were?"

"'Cause you don't like it when I drink," he mumbled. "And I don't have to talk to people there."

Rachel's shoulders slumped with relief. She'd just been a bit hysterical, was all, jumping to conclusions like that. She looked down at the table, feeling terrible about letting herself think he might be having an affair. "Well . . . why don't I have Charles take the girls to a movie? We could have a couple quiet hours to ourselves . . ."

Jack didn't say anything for another moment, and when he spoke it was with forced lightness. "Uh, yeah, sure. Sounds great."

"Good." Rachel pushed herself up and went outside, where Charles was teaching Janet how to fire a gun. Ava jumped with every pop and Rachel rubbed her stomach, feeling the kicks and punches against her hands. "It's okay, sweety. Daddy's not doing anything wrong; he's just stressed, is all. Daddy loves us both. Mommy just over-reacted. Charles!"

The former Marine looked up and tapped Janet on the shoulder before pulling her earmuffs off. Janet flicked the safety on, lowered the weapon, and took the magazine out before taking her own earmuffs off.

"What's up?"

Rachel rubbed her arms. October in Loleta was chilly. "Uhm, would you mind taking the girls to town for a movie or something?"

"Or something?" the blonde said with a tight smile.

She shrugged. "Jack and I just need a few hours to ourselves. There's just been so much happening, and we haven't had a lot of time for each other."

"Is Ava going to be here when we get back?" Susie asked.

Rachel tilted her head at the small bow the girl held. "Are you . . .?"

"Kid's a crack shot with the bow," Charles said as she ruffled Susie's hair. "Aren't you?"

"I'm gonna go to Gotham and be a superhero when I'm bigger!"

Rachel laughed. "Really? Who's your favourite?"

"I like Catwoman!"

Charles' fists clenched and she ground her teeth. "Catwoman isn't a superhero, Susie."

"But she's in love with Batman, and I wanna marry Batman!"

"I thought you wanted to marry Jack?"

Susie gave Rachel a Look and sighed heavily. "I'm going to be Ava's big sister," she said with attitude. "I can't marry Jack until she's big enough to take care of herself."

"So, we're done here?" Janet asked as Charles and Rachel laughed.

"Yeah. Get everything put away and get washed up; we leave in ten minutes." The girls scampered off and Charles turned a careful smile on Rachel. "Anything special planned for the night?"

"Just spending time together. I can't remember the last time we did more than kiss each other goodnight. I love your help, Charles, and I don't mind Susie and Janet, but . . ."

Charles looked around, then hugged her. "It's all a bit much?"

Rachel nodded as she returned the hug. "For him, for me . . . but mostly for him. Maybe . . . I mean, if tonight goes well, would you mind taking the girls out a couple times a week? I feel stupid for not thinking about this before. Jack's used to being alone all day, then we throw three people at him almost at once, and you and Janet can amuse yourselves, but Susie needs more attention than he's used to giving, you know?"

"I know," Charles nodded. "I understand. I'll take them out whenever you need me to."

"You're a live-saver, Charles."

"It's my job." They headed back inside. "Is he still going to that concert this weekend?"

Rachel nodded. "I think so. God, I hope so. He needs to relax."

"Okay. Janet likes that band, too. I'm sure Bruce will keep an eye on them for you." She kicked at the wall. "Ugh, I can't believe Susie likes that cat bitch . . ."

Rachel shrugged as she rubbed her lower back. "I'm sorry. I can't keep any of you straight any more."

"That bitch doesn't have a _chance_," Charles snarled. "If she keeps sniffing around_ my_ man ---" The stairs creaked and both women paused.

"You're supposed to change subjects smoothly when the person you're talking about walks in," Jack muttered as he rounded the corner.

"Surprisingly, not everyone's always talking about _you_," Charles said. "Not going to shave?"

He looked exhausted as he scratched the back of his neck, eyes a little wide. "Uh? No. Bath's running," he said to Rachel. "You're taking the girls, right?"

Charles nodded. "We're leaving in about five minutes. When do you want us back?"

Jack sucked on his lower lip and looked a little apprehensive. "Midnight? Is that too late on a school night? Wait, they're not in school any more . . ."

Charles patted his arm. "It's all right, Jack. Midnight's just fine. Janet! Grab the night-vision goggles!"

"Yes, ma'am!" the girl called back.

"Are you ready yet? Hurry!"

"Yes, ma'am!" Susie yelled.

Jack sidled up behind Rachel and wrapped his arms around her, leaning his forehead into the crook of her neck. He was breathing in sharply, then letting it out quietly, making it almost seem like he was crying. Rachel just covered his hands with one of hers and raised the other one to his hair, rocking from side to side as Charles herded Janet and Susie out the front door.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered.

Rachel thought she'd misheard him. "What?"

"I'm sorry. For the way I've been acting."

"I'm used to you sulking, Jack."

"No, it's . . . it's more than that. I've . . . I'm sorry, Rachel."

She turned in his arms slightly and slipped her arm over his shoulder, hugging him close as she kissed his cheek. "Jack . . . it's okay. Whatever you think you've done, it's okay. I love you."

"I don't deserve it," he mumbled.

Rachel laughed. "Since when do you _not_ think you deserve the best of everything? Where'd your ego go?"

"Enough about me. Let's move on to you." That made her laugh again as Jack walked her to the stairs. "You are . . . gorgeous." He kissed her neck. "You are . . . smarter than I am." He kissed the other side of her neck while Rachel kept laughing. "You are . . . the mother of my child." He patted her stomach lightly. "You are . . . kind. And . . . generous. And . . . you've never _not_ turned me on. Ever." Their clothes were coming off piece by piece, tossed on the stairs, the floor, anywhere.

"Even when I'm bloated and gassy and blaming it all on you?"

He nodded. "Even then. Sometimes I'm too tired or upset, but it's always an appealing thought. You're talented, and loving, and . . ." His voice lowered to a whisper as he shut the tub off. "And I wish I'd known you . . . before."

Rachel had often wished the same thing, wondered what their lives would have been like if they'd met each other before he'd gone completely crazy. She liked to think that she could have saved him from the madness before it had consumed him so totally. She sighed as she lowered herself into the bath tub, letting the water take a lot of the baby weight off of her lower back. Jack slid in behind her and crossed his arms over her chest, resting his cheek in her hair. They were both quiet for a long time before he spoke.

"I've been . . . trying to remember. Really remember, not just something I've made up for the hell of it. I want to . . . be able to explain to Ava, if I'm not as affectionate toward her as you are, why that is. I don't want her to think that I don't . . . love her." Rachel was quiet, just leaning her head down enough to kiss Jack's arms. He moved his hands over her stomach and pressed in, laughing a little when Ava pressed back. "I know that, uhm, I came to Gotham from Chicago. I don't think that's where I started, but . . . I've had military training. I wasn't _in_ the military, but someone who had been taught me most of what I know about bombs and weapons. Tactics." Jack sighed and hugged her tighter, and Rachel ran her fingers through his hair. "I don't know how long my mother was in the picture. I don't really remember her being there, but I do know that I hated my father. He was . . ." Jack shook his head sharply and whined a little in the back of his throat, pressing his face into the soft skin of Rachel's neck. "It's just that . . . if I ever treated you or Ava the way he treated me . . . I'd rather die than let that happen."

Her usual assurance that he would be a wonderful father died before it left Rachel's lips. What Jack needed right now was something solid to ease his fears. So she turned her head to kiss him while she pressed his hands into her belly.

"Is this why you didn't want a baby?" she asked quietly. Jack nodded. "The fact that you're worried about hurting us tells me that you won't, Jack. Right now . . . right now I think that you're worrying too much about it. I think you'll calm down a lot after Ava's born. Would you . . . rather we not leave you alone with her for a while?"

"Please," he whispered. "Are you okay? You've been really out of breath."

"Not much room for my lungs any more," Rachel replied. "But look, she's waking up more."

Jack watched her stomach move and distort as Ava started rolling over. "Ugh, that is _so weird_."

Rachel laughed. "It _feels_ weird, too. But it means she's healthy. Count with me."

Kick counting had become one of Jack's favourite sports once he'd learned about it. It let him bond with Rachel and Ava, in addition to making sure that Ava was doing just fine. Now his hands were following his daughter's movements and he was counting under his breath, occasionally poking Rachel's stomach to get the baby to move how he wanted her to. Rachel relaxed in his arms and felt all of her earlier tension melt away. She hadn't quite realised until now that _she'd_ been tense with their full house, too, but between the warm water, Jack's strong hands on her skin, and the comforting feel of him against her back, she felt so very much better about everything.

"So, what's on the agenda tonight?" he murmured in her ear.

Rachel smiled. "You."

"Me? That uh, that leaves a whole va_riety_ of options open. You might want to, uh, _nar_row it down a bit. I mean," and he chuckled, "unless you _want_ me to take dirty pictures of you."

He'd been enunciating more clearly for a few days. Which was good, because Jack had the tendency to mumble, but the particular speech patterns made Rachel's lips try to tug into a frown.

"That depends on if you plan to sell them or not, and if you do, how much of a profit am _I_ getting, and can you assure me that my mother and Bruce won't ever see them?"

That made Jack howl with laughter, which made Ava kick sharply. Rachel winced as he hugged her. "Oh, damn, there goes my _plan_ to get_ rich_."

"You know, taking dirty pictures of me while I'm pregnant might turn Ava into a porn star when she gets older. You wouldn't want to be responsible for _that_, would you?"

"Gyah! Damn it, Rachel, why do you _do_ that to me?" Jack was shuddering with disgust as she laughed at him.

"Relax, honey, she won't be a porn star because of dirty pictures."

"Whatever. Does this mean I can take them?"

"No, it doesn't."

". . . Can we have sex, now?"

She laughed again and shifted back against him, rubbing just a little. Jack sighed heavily as he gently cupped her breasts. "Yes, we can."

"Oh, good. I like tub sex."

"Jack, you like _all_ sex."

"Not my fault," he claimed as one hand found its way over and between her thighs. "Harleen said I could either channel all my anger into arts and crafts with the rest of the kooks at Arkham, or --- oh, _crap_, keep _doing_ that --- or have lots of sex."

"And," Rachel panted, "being a man, you chose sex."

"Of course," he whispered as he rested his forehead against the back of her neck. "She also, uh, also . . . she used words like fire, and burning . . . explosion . . . hard to choose Crayola when she was being soooo damned --- _nnn!_ --- _persuasive_." He bit into the soft flesh at the base of her neck and lifted Rachel enough to slide into her, panting. "Shit, that woman liked to talk dirty . . ."

"Sorry I'm so vanilla," Rachel whimpered as he held her still. She lay her head back on his shoulder and gasped.

"Oh, no, you're much more fun; you let me tie you up and order you around." Water was getting everywhere but neither cared at the moment. "You know what would have been great?"

"You shutting up about Harleen?"

He snorted. "No, a threesome with you two."

Rachel groaned, then bit her lip as it turned into a squeal when he pinched a sensitive nipple. "What _is_ it with you and group sex, Jack?! First Hideki and Raoul, now me and Harleen . . ."

"Don't get me started on fantasies with you three," was his growled response. "Unless you're actually interested in doing it."

"That would be like doing my brother," Rachel whispered as she closed her eyes. She drew her knees up a little more and gripped the sides of the bath tub tightly.

"Wanna watch?" Jack teased.

"_No_."

"What about you and Helna?"

"_Jack_! Shut _up_!"

He laughed but did as he'd been told, tilting her head to the side to kiss her lips. Rachel grabbed the hair at the back of his neck and held him there. It felt so _good_, even with Ava flip-flopping around in protest. Jack moved one hand to rub her belly and the baby kicked harder, which made him laugh into their kiss. After a while he pushed her gently forward until she was on her knees, whispering into her ear to make sure she was comfortable. Rachel just pushed back against him in reply, her lips barely grazing the water in the tub as she begged him to take her harder.

"If you insist," he moaned against her neck, and Rachel almost screamed as he stopped being careful with her. She grabbed on to the edges of the tub on either side of the tap to keep from cracking her skull against it, pushing her hips back against Jack and crying out encouragement. Her breasts were going to ache after this was over, but Rachel accepted the consequences gladly.

It didn't take long for Jack to finish, his fingers digging into her hips and leaving bruises. Rachel wasn't long after, thanks to his very talented fingers and tongue, and then he pulled her back again and she curled up on her side, her head resting on his chest as they both panted.

"You are _so_ amazing," Jack whispered in her ear.

"Mm, I try." Rachel tilted her head up to kiss him gently before snuggling back down into the cooling water. "Charles says she'll take the girls out a couple times a week for us, so we can have more time together. I'm so sorry, Jack, for bringing all these people into our home so suddenly. I forgot that you might need longer to adjust to them."

"It's . . . thank you. I don't mind them being here; I like the girls, and you're safe with Charles. I just . . . need a bit more alone time than I thought I needed." Jack sighed and pushed her up gently, wrapping a towel around them both after they were standing. "But hey, I'm all for them all getting out of my hair every few days. I don't need Susie running in, thinking I'm beating you to death or anything."

Rachel laughed. Jack wasn't taking his hands off of her for more than a moment as he dried her off and bundled her in her terry-cloth bathrobe, pulling her slippers on and then drying her hair off. "We might have to move Ava's room downstairs, in that case. Or learn to be quiet."

He rolled his eyes. "Eh, we'll just soundproof it and leave one of those baby monitor walkie-talkie things in there."

That made her laugh again. "Yeah, sure, we'll do that."

"Good! Now, how about a movie and some popcorn?"

"Sounds great," Rachel sighed as he pulled his own robe on and then helped her down the stairs. "Backrub?"

"Of course."

"What movie?"

"Porn?"

She hit his shoulder lightly. "I am _not_ watching porn with you. We don't even _have_ porn." His face was carefully neutral and Rachel hit him again. "Jack Dawes ---"

"Fine, fine! I don't have any porn, honest. Sheesh . . ." He was grinning as he settled her on the couch and dimmed the lights. "I'll be back with the popcorn." Rachel turned around and crossed her arms over the back of the couch, resting her chin on them with a smile as she watched Jack disappear into the kitchen.

When Charles got home with the girls, they were both asleep on the couch. She smiled and covered them with a blanket before herding Janet and Susie into their room and laying out some spare bedding on the floor to sleep on.


	22. Chapter 22

"You're sure? . . . Okay. . . . Yeah. . . . Okay. Thanks." Jack set his phone down and stared at the address he'd scrawled on the pad of paper, then tore the top three sheets off, tucked the address into his pocket, and threw the other sheets away. His fingers tapped out a rhythm on the table as he took a deep breath, held it, then let it out slowly. Then he picked his phone up again and dialed. "Hey, Tom. Write this address down. . . . No, I don't want you to send anyone out there yet. . . . Because they'll fuck it up, that's why. . . . Shut up and listen, pig. I've got people tracking their movements; should have a definite plan in a week or so. . . . Yeah, I know she doesn't have that long. You want --- no, I know that." He sighed and leaned against the wall, rubbing his forehead. "Look, Mary was dead the moment they took her, all right? I couldn't have helped her even if I'd told the cops everything I knew or suspected from the start. They're psychotic, Tom, not stupid." His friend wasn't yelling, just talking in a very, very low voice and Jack sighed again. "I'm sorry, too. Just don't do anything stupid, all right? Wait until I tell you --- because I know them, Tom, I know how they work. They're predictable. . . . Fine. Talk to you later." He hung up and then sealed the plastic baggie that was laying on the table, sticking it in the back of the freezer. It held a picture of his and Rachel's wedding day in it; he'd need it later.

Janet poked her head in and he turned to her with a smile. "You all packed? Mr. Wayne's plane should be here in half an hour."

"Yeah, it's all in the car already. Excited?"

She raised her eyebrows at him. "Front-row seats to Raped by Zombies, and a stay in Wayne Manor itself? Hell _yes_, I'm excited!"

"Watch your language," he told her with roll of his eyes.

"You're not the boss of me."

"I'll tell Rachel."

Janet laughed. "What's she gonna do? Ground me?"

He shrugged and brushed past her. "She grounds _me_ all the time."

"I'm not as whipped as you are."

"No, _she's_ the one who gets whipped."

Janet had been following him up the stairs, but her footsteps stopped. "Ex_cuse_ me?!"

Jack paused and turned an innocent look on her. "Yeeeees?"

She had a confused and disbelieving look on her face. "_What_ did you just say?"

He shrugged and turned back to the stairs. "Hell if I know. Rachel! You ready?"

"Two minutes!" she called back. "Can't fit in my damned shoes!"

"Wear your slippers, baby."

She grumbled something about not coordinating as Jack turned around, raising an eyebrow at Janet and the look on her face. "What?"

"Did you . . . never mind. I don't want to know."

"Probably not. Hey, Charles!"

"Yes, every thing's ready," she replied as the stove timer went off. "You're behaving yourself this weekend?"

"Can't get up to much trouble at Wayne's."

"Go put your bags in the car, Janet. You know what I'm talking about," Charles said softly after the girl had left.

Jack looked out the window and shrugged. "I know what you're talking about, and I'm not going to touch her. I'm feeling a lot better than I was. Look, call me if anything happens, all right? I'd rather not leave right now, but Rachel threatened to tell everyone I like Pokemon if I didn't."

"You are _such_ a pushover, sometimes."

A shrug. "Comes with the territory."

He was getting a knowing smirk. "And you're feeling a little guilty, maybe?"

"Not really. Haven't seen Veronica in a while, and she hasn't come sniffing around. I uh, I think I scared her." He grinned at that as Rachel stomped down the stairs in her green dinosaur slippers. "Told you the slippers would fit best."

"Well, I can't wear them to work, now, can I?" She stiffened when Jack hugged her, so he let her go. "Are you and Janet ready?"

"She's putting her bags in the car. Yeah, we're ready." Jack shoved his hands in his pockets and leaned down until he was at eye-level with Rachel, eyebrows raised as he smiled expectantly.

"What?" Rachel asked shortly. "What do you want?"

He sighed a little. "Well . . . I _am_ about to leave for the weekend . . ."

Rachel rolled her eyes as she brushed past him. "I'll kiss you goodbye at the airport."

His shoulders slumped as he followed her. "My wife doesn't love me any more . . ."

Rachel turned to give him a dirty look. "Oh, don't start that crap with me, Jack."

"Like you didn't do the exact same thing for the first, what, four months you were pregnant?" he complained as they got to the car.

"Stop it, you two," Charles cut them off. "Jack, leave her alone."

"What did I do wrong _now_?" Jack got in the back seat with Janet and almost slammed the door shut, then rested his elbow on the arm rest and propped his chin in his hand as he stared out the window. "I wish you weren't knocked up," he muttered.

"Well, maybe you'll get _lucky_, and I'll fall down some stairs tomorrow," Rachel countered acidly from the front seat.

"Shut _up_, you two! Jack, Rachel loves you. Rachel, Jack doesn't really wish you weren't pregnant. I've seen _Susie_ have more mature arguments than the ones you two have been in lately."

"What are you going to do this weekend?" Jack asked.

"Relax," was the answer. "Get pampered."

"_I_ pamper you."

"I meant a pedicure, manicure . . . maybe get my hair done . . ." She flipped her visor down to look at him in the mirror. "So I'll look pretty when we go to class on Monday."

Jack was quiet for a moment before he looked over at Janet. "Is it me, or does that woman not realise how gorgeous she is?"

"I think you're very pretty, Rachel," Janet replied. She'd been a little uncomfortable around him since Rachel's birthday; he'd have to talk with her about that on the plane.

His wife rolled her eyes. "I'm _so_ ready for this baby to be born. Ten weeks, two days . . ."

"Only ten weeks?" Jack squeaked. His eyes were wide and his heart started pounding. Ten weeks, then he'd have to hold Ava, and change her diapers, and feed her?

"Actually, thirty-seven weeks is considered full term." Was it just him, or was Rachel enjoying his sudden panic attack? "So maybe seven weeks. Who knows?"

"Aren't _you_ supposed to know?"

"It's not like I get a weekly memo from her, Jack. 'Okay, Mom, at thirty-seven weeks and two days, at four in the morning, I'm coming out.' It doesn't work like that."

Jack shook his head and rolled his eyes, ignoring Rachel until they'd reached the airport. Bruce's private plane was there, but the only passenger who got off was Hideki, there to keep Rachel company for the weekend. It took a good fifteen minutes for his initial excitement over Ava and Rachel to wear off.

With Janet at the top of the stairs to the plane and Jack at the bottom, he shuffled his feet and looked at Rachel through his eyelashes. On anyone else it would have looked coy, alluring. On Jack it just looked sullen.

"Weeeell," he drawled. Rachel's sigh was almost disgusted as she hugged him, but Jack pulled away. "Don't kiss me if you don't really want to."

"I don't know what your problem's been lately, Jack, but give me a damned kiss goodbye," she whispered. "This is what you _do_ when someone you love goes away for a day or more, even if you're mad at them. You let them know that you _still_ love them. I thought you knew this by now."

"Bad memory," he murmured, pulling her close, angling her body against his so he could hug her better, tilting her chin up to press kisses to her lips. "Oh, Saint Teresa, higher than the moon . . ."

Rachel wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pressed their cheeks together with a smile. "Every stone a story, like a rosary . . . God, I love your taste in music, Jack."

"You never know what I'm into next," he murmured in her ear, sighing as he ran his hands over her stomach. "How's my baby?"

"Fine, when her daddy's not sulking."

"She's not going to be fine very often," Jack laughed. "I sulk a lot. More blowjobs would help."

"Yeah, I'll think about that one." Rachel held his cheeks in her palms and kissed him again, then pushed gently against his chest. "Go on. Have fun."

"You sure you can't come with?" Jack asked again.

She shook her head. "I'm sorry, Jack. Doctor Howard said it wasn't a good idea. But we're not in trouble," was the hurried addition when Jack's brow puckered in concern. "It's just a little precaution. Now go on, sweety. I love you."

"Me, too," Jack muttered. Rachel just smiled. She always knew what he meant. He hoped, as he climbed the stairs to the plane and turned to look at her one last time, that Ava would also know what he meant . . . provided he was there to imply it. He shook off those thoughts as he settled onto the couch, watching Janet look around in amazement. "There's usually a stewardess or someone, but I guess you and I don't rank that high on Wayne's approval list."

Now she looked unsure and sat across from him _her legs wrapped around his waist as he knelt in front of her_ as the plane took off, biting her lower lip _as she moaned, slender hands grasping at his shoulders and leaving welts in their wake_ and Jack shook his head sharply. Those were thoughts that were entirely not needed, ever. They held no purpose. They didn't fit _like he fit, pressing into her as she gasped in his ear, fingers curling in his hair at the base of his neck, naughty words falling from her sweet lips_ and he didn't need them _agent of chaos that he was_ or their particular brand of insanity _**not** crazy_****

Jack stared at someone in the bathroom mirror and it took a few blinks and tilts of their heads for him to realise that it was his own reflection he was trying to menace, at which point he relaxed and didn't bother trying to remember how he'd gotten there. The tap was running and his face was wet; he must have been splashing it with water.

_. . . reach down for the sweet stuff, way she looks at me . . . i know any man . . . sees you like i see . . ._

"As they saw that you forgot to tell me," he whispered, staring into his own brown eyes and not recognizing the man staring back. He turned and slid down the wall, rubbing his face and shying away from his scars for a moment before exploring them inside and out, like he'd never felt them before.

A soft knock brought him out of his stupor some time later. "Jack? Are you all right?"

No, it wasn't _her_ skin he was remembering beneath his lips. He'd never know more of her taste past what he'd had that once.

_. . . way down in the hollow, leavin' so soon . . . oh, saint teresa, higher than the moon . . ._

"I'm fine," he said after he'd cleared his throat _is there something you forgot to tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me . . ._ "Just give me a moment."

_. . . show me, my teresa, feel it rise in me . . . every stone a story, like a rosary . . ._

"The plane's going to land soon." She didn't sound like he'd done anything to her; she didn't even sound concerned. He wasn't sure what he'd told her but it had obviously worked, and now all he needed was to get up --- good, push yourself up --- and wipe himself off --- not too hard, don't leave a mark --- and opened the door to Janet's tilted head and amber-flecked brown eyes.

_. . . she down on the corner, just a little crime . . . when i make my money, got to get my dime . . . she bold as a street light . . . dark and sweet as hash . . ._

"Uhm, hey. Sorry about that."

"About what? Using the bathroom? Oh no, Jack, how could you?" Janet rolled her eyes and Jack gave her a gentle smack upside the head.

"Shut up." He flopped back into his seat and stared at her. "Hey, you know . . . Rachel's birthday . . . that was a really dumb thing I did." She pursed her lips and flushed, not meeting his eyes. "I just, uhm . . . wanted you to know."

"Yeah, married men kissing other women's generally stupid. And kissing minors. But hey, Rachel always says you've got a severe lack of common sense." She was trying to make light of the situation and Jack snorted.

"I've got plenty of common sense. I just ignore it in favour of whatever's the most fun at the moment." There was a moment of slightly awkward silence, then Janet laughed a little.

"Well, if it helps, I told Hayden to keep his hands to himself until he learned to kiss better. And . . . thank you. I mean, yeah, it was a dumb thing to do, but . . ." Janet blushed again and looked at him from under her eyelashes as she shrugged. "It . . . helped."

A few moments of silence passed as the plane descended, and when the pilot came out of the cockpit, Jack and Janet were howling with laughter. Bruce watched them from the edge of his private landing pad with raised eyebrows.

"Hey, B! Why so glum? Still pissed that I knocked Rachel up?" Jack settled his arm around Janet's shoulder and pulled her close as he explained. "Not that he had a chance, but Brucey boy here had the hots for Rachel. Still hates that I got her."

"And I'm still not sure how that happened," Bruce put in. "You did try to kill her, after all."

"Hey, boy meets girl, boy throws girl out window, boy kidnaps girl and wires her to explosives. _That's_ true love. How could she _not_ want me after all that?"

"You tried to _kill_ Rachel?!" Janet exclaimed. Her eyes bugged out even more than they had when she'd been told she'd be a guest at Wayne Manor for the weekend. "How did she _not_ kill you for that?"

Jack was laughing as he shook Alfred's hand. "I gave her a decade to cool off. How'd she even get loose, anyway? She's never told me. Not that I've asked."

"Gordon's men were barely quick enough," Bruce replied as he gave Janet a winning smile. "There was some confusion over which hospital she went to, also, which was why we all thought she was dead."

"Well, I'll have to thank Gordon when I see him," Jack said. "Would you believe me that I'm sorry?"

Bruce looked over his shoulder as they entered the mansion. "Yes," he said simply.

"Janet, this is Sally Monroe," Bruce said, kissing the tall brunette on both cheeks. "Sally, this is Janet Mills. We're going out tonight; she's yours for the afternoon."

Jack had no clue who the woman was, other than a beautician or something that Bruce kept on retainer, but Janet obviously did. As Monroe took Janet by the elbow and started looking her over with pursed lips, Bruce gave her an encouraging nod.

"Sally will take good care of you, Janet. Jack and I will be back in a couple of hours, all right?"

"I have to stop by the police department and let Raoul know his man got there safe," Jack put in. "You'll be fine, Janet." She was looking nervous, but let them leave without a fuss, flattered to be having so much attention heaped upon her by Monroe and her cronies.

"Will she be all right?"

"Small town girl thrust into the arms of Gotham's elite beauty squad?" Jack scoffed. "She'll be fine. Janet's tougher than she lets on. Plus it's all girly crap, anyway, and she loves that shit."

Bruce laughed. "Raoul, next?"

"Yep." Once at the police department, Jack breezed through the doors and headed straight for Raoul's desk. "Hey, he got there just fine."

The younger man looked up, his phone to his ear, and placed the tips of his fingers on his chin briefly before pulling his hand down in an arc to mid-chest. Then he held his finger up in a 'wait' gesture.

"What'd he just do?" Jack asked Bruce as he stepped back and looked around.

"Sign language for 'thank you,' idiot. I already invited him to dinner tonight. Let's let him work."

"What did you do _now_?"

Jack turned to Gordon with a grin. "Knocked Rachel up; Bruce is still pissed about it. What's up, Commissioner Awesome?"

The older man rubbed at his eyes with a snort. "Congratulations. When's she due?"

"January ninth. It's a girl, and we're naming her Ava Mirelle."

"She make you memorise that?"

Jack shrugged. "Yeah, after the third time I told someone to piss off because it wasn't any of their business. Here, she makes me carry a picture." He dug his wallet out and pulled out the most recent picture of Rachel as well as the most recent ultrasound. "She was twenty-eight weeks here, and seven months in the ultrasound."

Gordon was grinning as he looked the pictures over. It matched Jack's grin. "She's beautiful; you must be proud."

"Yeah, well, Ava's my little accident. Rachel would have come down this weekend, but the doctor didn't want her traveling, so Hideki's babysitting." He took the pictures back and put them away. "Hey, lemme talk at you for a bit." Gordon pulled him into an empty office and took the piece of paper Jack handed him. "I'm pretty sure that's where they are. I've let Tom know, and he's not supposed to do anything yet. I don't trust the FBI to not screw this up. I need to make sure that's the right place, too."

The grins were gone and Gordon was at the computer, punching in the address. "You've got names?"

"Maury Moskowitz, or Maureen, and Anita Bentley. Raoul's been looking into it for me."

"I know," the older man murmured. "That's why Hideki and Charles are up there with Rachel?"

"Yeah. If they nab her while I'm in Gotham, it'd make getting me to cooperate easier. Oh, here, by the way." He pulled a thumb drive out of his pants pocket and tossed it on the desk. "A lot of it's probably out of date, but it's everything I could remember about the mob. Fuckers think they can screw around with me and get away with it."

"Thank you. They're getting desperate; the Justice League's cracking down pretty hard, these days. It might help with older cases; new evidence is almost always useful. And . . . you're not going to, ah . . ."

"Innocent people aren't going to die," Jack told him. "I can't guarantee anything else."

Gordon nodded. "But you'll warn us, right?"

Jack was staring at the picture of Rachel, holding her stomach as she leaned against the porch railing. "Yeah," he murmured. "Yeah."


	23. Chapter 23

"Are we allowed to be here?" Janet whispered, twisting her hands together nervously as she huddled against Jack's side. She was beautiful in a deep red gown that brought out the highlights that had appeared in her hair during the day. The gown was cut low enough to give her a sense of maturity, but high enough to still cover her modestly. It went to her ankles, adding a nice touch of elegance, and the golden heels were just high enough to bring the top of her head to Jack's nose. Her jewellery was also gold, set with rubies, and her hair was back in a French twist with the ends curled.

"Of course we are; B owns the place," Jack assured her. The red of his vest and tie matched her dress and he nodded in approval. "You look great."

She blushed as he held her chair out for her. "Thanks. Ms. Monroe and her employees were very nice to me."

"That's because B was paying them a lot."

"Thanks for dinner, by the way," Raoul said as he kicked Jack under the table. "I'm sure all of us appreciate it."

"Rachel wants me to bring her back that cream baklava," Jack told Bruce. "And I can't go back without it. The woman's crazy."

"Just like you," Bruce said easily as the waitress started pouring them all wine.

"Ah-ah-ah," Jack said as he wagged his finger at the man. "Ahead of the curve."

Janet's eyes got big when the waitress picked her glass up. "Oh, I'm ---"

"It's all right," Bruce assured her. "You can have a little wine."

"Hey, I'll drink what you don't; wine just makes me sleepy, anyway." Jack took a sip from his glass and then nodded in approval. "It's good."

"Better than the trailer park wine you usually get?"

"Boxed wine's just as good as this crap," Jack returned, winking at Janet. "Hell of a lot cheaper, too."

"Watch it," Bruce said as he jabbed his fork at the other man, "or _you're_ buying Rachel her next bit of jewellery."

"I can do that. See, it turns out I'm still on Charles' payroll, and it's direct-deposit. I was so used to not having my own bank account that I completely forgot they'd transferred Harleen's to me. I've got _plenty_ of money."

"What about your bills, after Harleen died?" Raoul asked.

"That's what Rachel was for; she took care of most of my expenses, and it wasn't until we moved that I was given complete access to the bank account, anyway." He grinned. "I take care of her, she takes care of me. It works."

"I didn't think silk hankies counted as taking care of her," Raoul teased, then he looked at Janet and went a little pale. Janet took a serene sip of her wine as all three men started talking at once, trying to explain the comment away. Then she made a nasty face and coughed, quickly setting her glass down in disgust.

"I uh, I know about Jack and Rachel's, ah . . . play times," she said when they'd paused to catch their breaths.

Bruce turned a glare on Jack, who held his hands up in self-defence. "Hey, I didn't say a thing!"

"Rachel told me," Janet said. She was blushing, but holding together admirably well. "I mean, she didn't give me specifics, but . . . uhm . . ."

"When did _this_ happen?" Jack wanted to know.

"Couple of weeks ago. I was helping her clean the house, and uhm, I dropped a box . . ."

"When I was over at Tom's? Bah, I told her I'd help when I got home . . ." Jack rolled his eyes in disgust, but didn't seem particularly upset or even embarrassed that he and Rachel's secret was out. "Well, you and Hayden can't borrow anything, so don't ask."

"Jack! She's only sixteen!" Bruce protested.

"Doesn't mean she can't have sex. With someone her own age."

"But I told you, I told him my legs are sealed for the time being. Welded together, in fact. He wasn't happy about it." Janet shrugged. "I told him that my mom's missing, I've been put in foster care --- even if it _is_ with people I _like_, and in town to boot --- and that this just isn't a good time for anything, really. So . . . yeah, we're not seeing each other any more." She looked down at the table, obviously hurt by the situation.

"I told you he's an idiot," Jack said after a moment. "People should listen to me more." Then he reached out and covered Janet's gloved hand with his own, squeezing gently. "You're too good to waste on him, anyway." Janet ducked her head and smiled up at Jack through her lashes as the pink flush across her cheeks deepened.

_. . . that's where i'll hold you, sleeping like a child . . ._

He shook his head once, sharply, and turned the conversation to the next night's concert. It provided sufficient distraction for the woman-child in red to stop being so alluringly untouched, gave Jack enough of a breather to get his aching head on straight for the rest of dinner. He needed no reminder that he was back in Gotham, but he _did_ have to concentrate on his behaviour, on keeping a low profile. He didn't need the media hysteria that would come about if someone recognised him and flipped about the Joker being back in town. Really, after fourteen years it oughtn't be something to freak out over, but still . . . Sometimes it paid to keep a low profile.

And sometimes one got noticed no matter what. Jack was reminded of that when Janet started glancing to the side every few minutes, and finally leaned toward him. "Uhm, do you know those two?" she whispered. "The man with the, uhm, the Jewish . . . thing . . . on his head?"

"Yamaka," Jack responded automatically as he nabbed the last piece of bread before Bruce could. He took his time spreading butter --- _real_ butter, damn it, not that fake crap Rachel insisted on --- over it, then turned just enough to see the older couple two tables down. He dropped his bread on the floor and turned back to the table, almost knocking his wine glass over as his entire body went cold. "Shit," he whispered. He was staring down at his hands as they gripped the tablecloth tightly, almost hyperventilating as panic struck him. "Shit. _Shit_."

"What's wrong? Who are they?" Janet was frightened --- of course she was. Her mother was missing, presumed dead, and the person who had taken her was trying to kill Jack, who wasn't afraid of anything. Except, maybe, the elderly Jewish couple behind him.

"Do you need to get some air?" Bruce asked with concern. "They're not trouble, are they?"

Jack was breathing shallowly through his mouth and shook his head quickly. "No --- I just --- it's not --- those are Harleen's folks." And here _he_ was, with Rachel nowhere in sight, with another woman . . .

"_Oh._" Bruce offered Jack some water and watched him down it frantically. "Should we skip dessert?"

"No, I'm --- I just . . . I wasn't expecting them."

"Well, here they come," Raoul murmured, giving Jack just enough time to hunch his shoulders before Rabbi Quinzel spoke.

"Hello, Jack."

He flinched like he'd been hit, looking like he was trying to melt into the floor. "Uh . . . hi." He kept his eyes on the table, his hands gripping the edges until they were white.

"We haven't . . . seen you in a while."

The older man got a shrug. "Yeah, uh, I moved. Upstate."

"So we heard. And . . . Rachel, is it?" Jack nodded, short and jerky movements. "How is she?"

"Uh . . . fine. She's not here." He winced, realising how stupid he sounded, and attempted to grow a backbone as he straightened and finally looked up at his former in-laws. "She'd have come down with us, but the doctor didn't want her travelling. A couple friends are staying with her."

"I hope she's all right," Harleen's mother said with a frown.

Jack shrugged. He really didn't want them knowing that he and Rachel were living the life that he and their daughter had never had the chance to live. "Yeah, she's fine, it's just a precaution. She's uhm . . . well, we're . . . So, this is Bruce Wayne, and Raoul Gillespie. And uh, Janet Mills. Uh, this is Abraham Quinzel, and uh, Marni Quinzel. They're uhm, they're Harleen's parents," he explained again. "My uhm, my first wife."

"It's a pleasure to meet you," Bruce said with a smile. "Care to sit down?"

The Quinzels looked down at Jack as Janet touched his hand gently. He shrugged. "Uh, yeah, have a seat. B owns the place, it's all good. If you want to."

It took a few tense minutes before the Quinzels were seated with them, and Abraham cleared his throat as he finally sat. "What brings you to town?"

"Uh, a concert. Rachel made me go. Uhm. The tickets were an anniversary gift, but she can't come, but Janet likes the band, so . . ." Jack cleared his throat. "Uh, Janet's my uhm, I mean, Rachel and I are . . ."

"Jack and Rachel are my foster parents for the time being," Janet finally spoke up. "My mom's . . . she's . . ." She cleared her throat, as well, but went on bravely. "My mom went missing almost a month ago. Jack and Rachel took me and my sister in until she's found."

That made the older couple pause for a moment. Obviously, Jack in any sort of position of responsibility where children were concerned had never occurred to them. Unless it was to give them nightmares, maybe. Marni cleared her throat after a moment.

"I'm so sorry to hear that, dear. I hope everything turns out all right. And Rachel, you said she's ill?"

Jack sighed and covered his eyes with one hand. "She's pregnant," he finally admitted. He peeked out at the two from between his fingers. They were staring at him in shock. "Yeah, we got knocked up," he coughed. "Uh, it's a girl, her name's Ava Mirelle, she's due January ninth." He shut up, not wanting to look at Harleen's parents. They'd lost her daughter to a psychopath, then lost her for good when she'd died; they'd never gotten the chance to be grandparents. They'd never been able to hold a grandbaby. Harleen had always been . . . not against children, _per se_, but it had never been the 'right time,' according to her. The terrified look on Jack's face whenever the subject had been brought up had probably played a big role in that, too.

"Congratulations," was Abraham's quiet yet sincere response a few moments later.

"Thanks," he murmured. Then he cleared his throat as he dropped his hand to his pocket, where his wallet and pictures rested. "I'm uh, I'm sorry I haven't been in contact ---"

"Why should you have been?" Abraham asked. "We shunned you after you married Harleen, and after she died, you had no reason to talk to us. If anything, _I'm_ sorry that Marni and I didn't check in on you. Whether we liked it or not, you were our son-in-law, and we should have stepped up and supported you." He pursed his lips before taking a sip of wine.

"Look, I understand now and I understood then," Jack argued. "It didn't bother me. I mean, I'm glad you don't hate me, but you don't have to make yourselves uncomfortable over it. I already had more people there for me than I knew what to do with." His phone buzzed and he grabbed it out of his pocket, glad for the distraction. It was a video message from Rachel and he frowned as he flipped the phone open and waited for it to download. "Sorry; it's from Rachel . . ."

The video started with the camera pointing at Rachel's bare stomach. Susie or Charles must have been holding it, then. "Are you ready?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah!" Susie's voice replied. The camera shook a little. "Daddy's gonna love this!"

Jack wasn't sure who she was talking about, but Rachel laughed. "All right, Jack, see this? Ava's awake, but she's not moving. Watch this."

He frowned when Rachel's voice started again; he'd been making recordings of himself talking to Ava, so the baby could hear his voice when he wasn't around, and this was a recording that Rachel had spoken in, too. They were reading a story. Rachel's hand curled around her stomach and rubbed gently as Susie giggled, then Jack started speaking. Rachel's stomach contorted almost immediately as Ava started moving around. Jack's eyebrows went up.

As soon as his voice stopped, Ava stopped moving. "Wait, there's more," Rachel murmured. Her voice continued the story, but Ava stayed still until Jack spoke again, at which point she started moving once more. The camera angled up to Rachel's beaming face after a moment. "She knows your voice, sweety. Isn't that amazing? Ava loves her Daddy and misses you. The video's almost done; call us!" It froze on her smile and Jack stared at it for a while, a huge grin creeping across his features.

"What was that?" Bruce wanted to know.

Jack looked up quickly, then back at the frozen image. "Ava knows my voice," he murmured. "Uhm . . . Rachel and I, we've been recording stories and stuff, so she can play them back to Ava while she's at work. Apparently they were listening to one and Ava started moving when she heard me." Jack wasn't shrieking with laughter. He wanted to, though. He wanted to leap up and laugh and dance because his little girl already knew his voice, knew who he was. He _did_ start chuckling, but since no one gave him strange looks, it obviously wasn't too overboard. "Wanna watch?" Then he looked at the Quinzels and swallowed sharply, not knowing if they'd be offended, or jealous, or . . . something. He didn't know how people reacted to things like this.

To his vague surprise, though, the Quinzels leaned forward with interest. That removed any lingering reservations about showing his wife and baby off, so Jack started the video again and turned it so they all could see. He was grinning the whole time.

"I don't know who Susie was calling Daddy," he said after the video had finished.

Janet laughed. "Who's the only man Susie wants to be her father?" she asked. "Think hard."

He gave her a scrunched-up look. "I keep telling her, I'm not her dad."

"But you are," Abraham said. "This is your sister, yes?" Janet nodded. "You're her foster father, then, which makes you her father."

"But I'm not _really_ ---"

"To a child that young, you are." Marni was smiling. "Are you okay with baby supplies? Clothes, diapers, bedding . . .?"

Jack shrugged. "Yeah, I think so. Rachel goes on a shopping spree about once a week, and some friends of ours have a baby girl, so they've given us some stuff. Oh, here, this is the Mitzi-thing." He pulled up some pictures of Mitzi that he'd snapped and passed the phone around. "Isn't it ugly?"

"If by ugly, you mean absolutely adorable," Marni remarked. "Then yes, she's hideous."

Jack grinned again. "So, her first words went 'da-da,' 'ma-ma,' and 'Ja-Ja.' Kid loves me. I'm teaching it to be a criminal mastermind and take over a small country."

"As you can see," Janet offered, "Jack hates kids."

"Of course I do. Minions aren't kids, though. Quiet, minion," he ordered when she opened her mouth again. The conversation drifted for a while after that, with only a few moments of awkwardness for Jack and the Quinzels.

Once dinner was finished and they were pulling their coats on in the lobby, Abraham pulled Jack to the side and cleared his throat. "Jack, Marni and I . . . we're glad that you're doing so well." He held his hand up to keep Jack silent. "I want you to know that we don't hate you, we don't blame you for Harleen's death, and we're not upset that you and Rachel are starting a family. Please don't worry about any of that."

Jack's lips twisted as he scratched the back of his head. "Was it that obvious?"

Abraham's eyes crinkled even more as he smiled. "Just a little. If you need anything, please let us know. I know we have no business being a part of your life, but . . . we'd like to be. I know Harleen would want us to."

Jack looked at him for a long moment before he smiled slightly. "Thank you. I'll talk with Rachel; I think she'd like that." Let them substitute Rachel and Ava for Harleen and the grandchild they'd never gotten. It would be good for everyone.

"Thank _you_. Here's our number if you ever need anything." He handed Jack a slip of paper and the younger man took it with a nod. "Have a good weekend, Jack."

"I will. You, too." Abraham smiled and went back to his wife, who was also smiling at Jack as he returned to his own group. He threw his jacket over Janet's shoulders as she shivered and hugged her close. "We ready to go? I'm tired."

"Yeah. Are you okay?" Bruce wanted to know as his limo finally pulled up to the curb.

"I'm fine," Jack replied. He handed Janet in, then settled next to her and tugged at her hair. "Rachel's gonna ground you for dyeing your hair without permission."

"Grow up," he was told, which prompted laughter from everyone. "I'm only being nice to you so you'll take me to this concert, you know."

"Naw, you love me, you know you do." Janet flushed and looked away with a snort, which made Jack grin broadly. Even smooching on Hayden hadn't diminished her crush on him. Hot damn, he was a stud. That made Jack start laughing as he took his phone out to watch Rachel's video again.

***

"--- so, they want us to call them," he finished later, laying on his stomach on the bed in the guest room Bruce had given him. Strangely, it was quite a ways away from Janet's.

"Are you okay with it?" Rachel wanted to know.

"Actually, yeah. I mean, they never got grandkids, y'know? I'm not . . . I don't just feel sorry for them. I mean . . . oh, hell, look, they'll enjoy it, Ava will get more grandparents . . . yeah, I'm good with it. If you are, I mean. I suppose it'd be a little odd to have the parents of your husband's dead first wife hanging around . . ."

"No, I think it's a great idea," she assured him. "I've been feeling bad because we only have Mom . . . I'm just stuck on kids needing more than one grandparent, I guess."

"It's traditional," Jack reasoned. He was plucking at the blankets and sighed. "Hell, what do I know. My folks are probably dead, and good riddance to my sperm donor."

Rachel was quiet for a while, and when she spoke, it was soft. "What about your mother?"

He rolled his eyes as his chest clenched minutely. "I told you, I don't know. She split really early on and didn't bother taking me. _If_ the woman's still alive, I really don't want to know."

"Maybe she didn't have a choice," Rachel offered gently.

"A choice? Not to take her kid out of a potentially deadly situation? What would _you_ do, Rachel?"

"I don't know the circumstances. But I'd do my best to get Ava away from someone who was hurting us. And maybe she tried."

Jack scoffed. "Right. She tried _really_ hard, I can tell. I don't wanna talk about this, popsicle. I really don't. Why's Susie calling me Daddy?"

"Because you're her foster father. She was _so_ excited when she figured it out today." Rachel next silence was hesitant and probing.

Jack sighed. "What do you want?"

"Well . . . if Mary's not found, if she dies . . . these girls aren't going to have anyone, Jack. Them staying with us is only temporary, and they'll be shuffled through the foster system as wards of the state until they're eighteen. I don't want to put them through that, not when we can take care of them, love them . . . because you _do_ love them, Jack, and you know it."

Jack was quiet as he rolled over onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. He thought he knew, but . . . "So what do you want to do?"

Rachel was quiet for a moment, too. "If Mary dies, I'd like to . . . if _you_ want to . . . adopt them. I mean, we'll need to talk this over more when you get home, but . . . just off the top of your head, what do you think?"

His eyes closed and he took deep, even breaths as he thought about it. More links back, certainly, that's what planning to adopt his girls would be. And Mary was most certainly _not_ making it back alive. And even though he complained about it all the time, Jack liked it when Susie called him Daddy. It flew in the face of what was telling him he'd be a terrible father, that no one would ever love him or want to be near him. It gave him hope that Ava would love him that much, too.

"Jack? Are you there?"

"Yeah," he muttered. "Just thinking."

"And?"

". . . if they need a home, we'll keep them. I don't mind."

"I love you, Jack," Rachel whispered.

"See? That's why I do these things, for the affection." He turned on his side with a smile. "And . . ."

"Yes?"

"When you got back from California . . . you stopped me from giving you my answer, but . . . it was yes." She took in a shaky breath and sniffed, which made Jack want to hold her tightly. He squeezed a pillow, instead.

"Jack . . . I . . ." Rachel was crying, now, but he knew they were happy tears.

"Probably should have told you anyway, but I'm an admitted moron. And . . . I was more upset that I hadn't been able to tell you yes before you got pregnant. That's what made me so mad for so long. Hey, are you okay? Baby?"

"I'm fine," she whispered. "I love you so much, Jack. Ava's never going to know how lucky she is to have a father like you."

"Oh, she will, the first time she needs me to scare some pesky boy away for her." That made Rachel laugh and Jack chuckled along with her. "Uh, you want me to talk with Janet? Run the whole adoption thing by her, see how she'd feel about it?"

"You don't want to talk about it more?"

"If it comes down to us or the foster system, they're staying with us," he said firmly.

"Okay. Talk with her if you want." Then she yawned.

"Get some sleep," Jack said. "Lemme talk to Ava." He waited while Rachel laughed, then put the phone to her stomach. "Hey, sweety, it's Daddy. You're being good, right? I miss you, but I'll be home soon. Good night, precious."

"She heard you," Rachel said a few moments later. "She kicked a bit."

Jack grinned. "Good. Have a good night, Rachel."

"You, too. I love you." They hung up a moment later, and Jack snuggled under the covers with a huge smile on his face.


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N:** I'm warning you now for underage, drunken, dub-con making out, which is why chapter 25 follows immediately. I expect that more than a few readers will be highly disturbed by this chapter, but please, I beg that you bear with me and keep reading. There's another author's note at the end.

***

"My, aren't _you_ all Gothed out," Jack remarked as he leaned in the doorway of Janet's guest room. She jumped and flushed as their eyes met in the mirror. Her own were smudged with kohl, making her look like she'd been punched and he told her so, which earned him a dirty look. Jack rolled his eyes as he walked to her and started wiping her face off. "Honey, let _me_ fix your make-up," he told her in a nasally whine. "Trust me, you'll look better my way. I put Rachel's make-up on all the time."

"No wonder you're ugly," Janet returned as she settled her fishnet glove-clad hands on her hips. "Her foundation just _doesn't_ match your skin tone."

That made Jack tilt his head back and howl with laughter for a moment. "I meant I put it on _her_, dumb-ass," he said once he'd caught his breath. "Don't be a brat, or I'm leaving you here tonight." Her eyes fluttered shut as he brought the eye shadow up and Jack licked his lips. Her own lips were parted slightly. It would be so _easy_ to dip his head down, make contact with that sensitive flesh . . . He pulled back and cleared his throat as he applied her make-up quickly, ignoring the small, tight, and strategically torn top she was wearing, ignoring her green plaid skirt that he'd first mistaken for a belt.

"Are you all right?" she whispered.

"Yeah," he grunted back. "I'm fine."

"I didn't really peg you for a nympho," Janet went on. Jack blinked at her as she opened her eyes and she coughed delicately, placing one hand on his chest and pushing back. Jack looked down at her hand and only then realised that their hips were moulded together tightly; there was no way she was missing his erection and it brought a flush to his cheeks as he jerked away. "I mean, I can't be _that_ attractive."

"You're not," he mumbled over his shoulder, leaning his forehead against the wall. "I just . . . have issues with sex."

She was quiet from across the room. "Issues like what?"

Jack didn't want to discuss this with her, but the kid had the right to know, especially if he was going to adopt her and Susie. So he took a deep breath and didn't turn around as he started talking. "When I was in Arkham . . . when Harleen was my psychiatrist there . . . I needed something other than Batman to focus on, to obsess over. A healthier focus. She, uh, she wasn't . . . I suppose that what she did wasn't the most ethical thing, but . . . well, now sex is sort of stress relief for me. She was always available for me, pretty much. If we fought, she turned it into sex. If I was thinking about pussy, I wasn't concentrating too hard on killing people." He swallowed. "And since Harleen made it clear that I didn't have a _chance_ with anyone else, and then I was with Rachel . . . and with both of them, I was terrified of being thrown away . . . I never really learned to control myself. Not that I was good at self-control in the first place."

Janet was quiet for a few seconds. "So . . . you were kissing on me because you can't keep it in your pants?"

"You throwing yourself at me didn't exactly help," he snapped, then sighed. "All right, yeah, you've got a point. I've got some control issues, and I've been under a lot of stress lately. That makes it worse. I mean, a _lot_ of stress. And I'm trying to control it, but you're so damned _willing_, and I've just . . ."

"Got a lot going on. I'm sorry, Jack." Janet sounded like she was trying not to cry. "You're the first _man_ that I'd ever liked, and you were so mysterious at first . . ."

"Classic bad boy. That's what Rachel calls me."

"I didn't know," she murmured. "I didn't . . . I didn't mean to make things worse."

Jack laughed a little. "I know you didn't, doll. I know you didn't. And it's not your fault, and I don't want you to be so hung up on me that you're not, you know . . . being a kid. 'Cause you're still a kid. And you should be acting like one, not trying to be all grown up."

"You're bad at these talks," Janet said dryly.

"Well, I've got about sixteen years to get good at them, before I have to say all this to Ava." He blinked at the wall. "Minus the whole kissing me thing."

"All right, let me see if I get this. You've got self-control issues that I made worse, but aren't my fault, therefore I shouldn't feel guilty but I _should_ be a little more sensitive. You also want me to stop trying to be an adult and enjoy my youth more. Is that right?"

"Your summarizing skills are excellent," he confirmed with a nod. "Thanks."

"Well, I can't guarantee that _I'll_ always have good self-control, but I'll try not to jump you. Are we done? I don't wanna be late."

Jack finally turned to look at her and shook his head. "You're a brat, you know that?"

"Yeah, I know." Janet smiled and he returned it.

"Okay, we're done. Oh," Jack went on as they walked out of the room, "there's one other thing. It . . . might not be the time to bring it up."

Janet stayed by his side and looked up at him. "Well, you've got me interested, so why not tell me now. Otherwise I'll bug about it because I _hate_ not knowing things."

"Well, then. Rachel brought it up, but . . . look, you and Susie can't stay in foster care forever." Jack ran his fingers through his hair and stopped, turning to her. "And if Mary doesn't . . . well, look, if anything happens, Rachel and I want you and Susie to stay with us. For good."

Janet blinked at him and the half-smile she'd had faded from her lips. Her lower lip started trembling a little as she stared at him and opened her mouth. "A, are you . . . you and Rachel, you want to . . . adopt us?"

With his hand shoved in his pockets, Jack looked at the floor as he rocked back on his heels and nodded. "Yeah. If you want."

"And _you're_ all right with this? I mean, you hate kids."

"Yeah, well, you two kinda grew on me. And then there's the Mitzi-thing, and I've got Ava on the way . . . it's sort that whole, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em thing." He pursed his lips and cleared his throat before swallowing sharply. "So . . . what'd'ya think?"

"What are the chances of Mom coming back?" Janet asked softly. Jack was quiet. She sniffed. "Ah . . . in that case . . ." She took a shuddering breath and Jack wrapped his arms around her tightly. "Thank you so much," she whispered into his chest. "Thank you. I don't want to live with anyone else, and I can't lose Susie, too."

Jack pulled back gently and coughed. He could _smell_ her. "All right, c'mon, we'll be late." He let her take his hand as they walked to the car outside, then handed her in. "How's uh, how's the shooting practice coming along?"

"Good," she said quickly. It was obvious she was glad for the change of subject. "Good. Susie's great with the bow and arrows, too. Charles said . . . she said it might come in handy." Big brown eyes looked at him earnestly and all Jack could think of was how they'd look from a much higher angle, her face pressed into his groin. He rubbed his eyes --- hard --- as she continued. "Are they going to try to take Rachel soon?"

"Sooner than later," he mumbled. He pressed against the door and didn't care if she realised he was trying to get away from her while she fiddled with her skirt as it rode up her thighs. She was all smooth and firm and tender, a complete waste of virgin naivete as far as he was concerned. The thought of her and her little boyfriend, making out under the bleachers and afraid they'd be caught . . . Janet just wanted to _feel_, to_ belong_, to be _normal_ in spite of her abnormal circumstances, and the thought of some jerk-off _boy_ touching her made Jack angry. _He_ wanted to be her first fuck. Not Hayden. Not anyone. _Him_. Fuck, and he was _willingly_ letting this temptation become his ward?

Well, he didn't _have_ to adopt her. He _might_ not even make it_ back. Prob_ably --- _hope_fully --- _wouldn't_. She still wanted him. Hell, he could lean over _right now_ and have her, lick her pussy until she_ screamed_, until she was so weak that he had to _carry_ her into the concert hall.

He got a sudden, sharp prod and opened his eyes. Janet kicked him again and this time dug her heel in a bit. "Whatever you're doing, stop. You're creeping me out."

"Are you afraid?" he whispered from behind his hand.

"Does Rachel know you have such a big problem with keeping your . . . man-bits . . . to yourself?"

"Is that a threat?"

"This isn't the Question Game," Janet snapped. He watched the rise and fall of her chest and while it icould/i be contributed to anger or fear, the way her eyes fluttered said that it was desire.

So he shrugged. "She knows I like pussy." The girl flinched at the word and blushed even as she stared him down. _Oh_, he wanted to make her _squeal_. It was Jack who shook his head and bit the inside of his lip until he bled. The pain washed over him, calmed him, and he cleared his throat. "All right, maybe she doesn't realise I've been having a little difficulty with it the past couple of months."

"You might want to tell her. I mean, if you lost it and had an affair . . ." She trailed off with a deeper blush and looked out the window.

With _her_, maybe? He could _bury_ his _face_ between her --- "I've got it under control," Jack said loudly. "Chill out."

Janet gave him a look of such disbelieving disgust that he wondered if she practised it. "Not when you're looking at me like you're gonna do me in the limo! Get a grip, Jack!"

He slumped lower in the seat and lolled his head to the side, still covering his eyes with one hand. He moved his fingers just enough to stare at her. "You'd like it," he whispered hoarsely, breathing deeply and rhythmically. Janet was losing some of her nerve and swallowed sharply while she licked her lips. He mimicked her out of reflex and she looked away. "You'd _love_ it."

"Dissociative disorder."

That threw him. "Huh?"

"I've been reading about it. You black out sometimes, don't you?" Jack nodded once, warily. It was more a shifting of his head than an admission. Janet waved her hand in the air as she tried to gather the correct words. "You're . . . you're like two different people sometimes, especially recently. The Jack _I_ know would run _screaming_ if a girl wanted him to kiss her, right back to Rachel. But _you_ just . . . go for it. You encourage it."

"A lot's happened in eight months," he muttered. She was fascinated by him, falling into that same damned claptrap that almost _every_ woman fell into, of wanting to _fix_ him, of being turned _on_ by the thought of doing a psychopath. She was inexperienced enough to give in, too. He wondered what she thought about when she masturbated, but Jack shook his head again and pressed his cheek against the cool window.

"When's it going to stop?"

"Soon," he whispered. His head _hurt_, damn it. All he wanted to do was bury his face between her legs and lose himself in that oblivion, lap it up and wallow. Jack's phone was out and pressed to his ear as it rang, as Janet crumpled her eyebrows together in concern.

"Hey, sweety. What's up?"

"Got a headache," Jack whispered into the phone, Rachel's voice unwinding his tenseness. "We're on our way to the concert."

"Already? I didn't realise it was so late. I popped in to the office to grab a file and got sidetracked."

His heart flip-flopped. "Are you alone?"

"No, Helna's with me. Watch her, Helna, she's grabbing the --- oh, phew, just in time." Jack's lips twitched as he imagined the toddler trying to grab everything and put it in her mouth. He had something that _Janet_ could --- "Have you taken any aspirin?"

"For what?" Jack asked.

"Your headache? The one you called to get babied about?"

Jack smiled at that. "Naw, you're medicine enough, baby. How's Ava?"

"Quiet. Healthy," she said quickly, obviously having heard his breath hitch in concern, "but quiet. She's probably sleeping right now."

"Lazy."

Jack's wife laughed as he glanced over at Janet, his gaze sliding up her legs and over the swell of her breasts. Jack blinked and looked away. "Not enough room," Rachel corrected.

"Can I call you after the concert?" he asked quietly. "I uh, I need to tell you something private." Janet was doing her level best to ignore Jack's blatant innuendo.

"Something private?" Rachel's voice rose in pleased surprise. Helna giggled in the background. "Whatever should I wear?" There was more laughter. Jack had loaned Tom a few of his books; apparently Helna had been pleased with the results. The woman said something about cockrings and Jack rolled his eyes.

"Tell her I've got one already."

"My green scrunchy is _not_ a cockring, Jack."

"Makes a great one. I like it when you wear it the next day. I don't care what you wear, but make it good. Invite Helna and Tom over, put me on speaker phone, and we'll all make a night of it."

"No group sex!" Rachel admonished. There was a whistle and Jack laughed. "Helna, stop encouraging him! Look, I need to get Helna home. Tom's working later than usual and she misses her vibrator."

"Oh, well, as long as you tape it, I don't mind."

"I'm not having sex with Helna. Shut up, Jack, I'm going, now. Love you."

"Love you, too," he whispered. Helna was singing that Bad Touch song as Rachel hung up, laughing.

"Feel better?" Janet asked after a few moments of silence.

"Other than a raging hard-on brought on by my wife and her pervy friend, yes, I feel great," Jack said brightly. Janet flushed and looked away again, which made him chuckle. "Too bad you're only sixteen; you have to miss out on the fun."

"I don't want to hear this. Stop it." She raised her hands to her ears and he was tempted to go on, but Jack stopped with another grin. "You're an asshole," Janet muttered.

"Born and bred," he agreed. "So, doc, tell me more about myself. That whole psychology thing."

"I'm not your doctor. What are you doing?"

He looked up from the internet browser on his phone and grinned. "Ignoring your psycho-babble. Looks like Raped by Zombies is gonna sing some stuff from their new album tonight. A song called 'Glasgow Baby' and . . . in Metropolis they sang one called 'In the Trunk.'"

"'Glasgow Baby'?"

Jack shrugged and touched his scars. "It'd be ironic, wouldn't it?"

"To the extreme," she responded dryly, sitting fully upright now that she was sure he wasn't going to maul her. "Look, all I know is what I've Wiki'd, all right? Just don't tell me the Joker was a split personality; that would be _so_ lame."

Jack's smile faded and he turned to the window. "The Joker's not a split personality," he assured her in a low voice. Jack wanted to die and he wanted to scream with laughter. Neither happened as the limo pulled into the parking lot of the concert hall and stopped. The man had the presence of mind to wrap a scarf around his neck and mouth as the driver opened the door for them, and rested his hand between Janet's shoulder blades as they walked to the end of the line. "Lot of people for an underground band."

Janet looked at him from the corners of her eyes, but the tenseness in her back eased when he didn't move his hand. "Ten fans don't get you famous," was her reply.

"Right, it takes at least eleven." He was still staring at her outfit, watching the way her striped thigh-high leggings clung to her . . . and were those garter straps? His eyes unfocused as his heart skipped a beat and his hands clenched into fists as they were shoved into his pockets. _Fuck_. Her chunky platforms brought her up to almost the perfect height for it, actually, and he wanted to drag her into an alley, push her against the wall, and see if he could make her pass out. Jack lowered his head and tapped his foot impatiently as they waited, looking everywhere _but_ at Janet. She was too busy ogling at their surroundings to notice him much, anyway.

There was a minor hiccup when they presented their IDs to get into the concert hall. The man checking them paused when he saw Jack's and looked at him in surprise. Jack tugged his scarf down just enough to show the tops of his scars and smiled. The man looked down at his list, then reached under the podium he was sitting at and pulled out another list, his gaze flicking up to Jack every once in a while.

"Everything all right?" Jack asked casually. Janet was looking anxious.

"No, no, it's all right." He glanced them over, but since they hadn't worn jackets and Janet wasn't carrying a purse, there was no need to search them. "Go on in."

"Thanks, friend." Jack led Janet inside. There was time enough before the show to get something to drink, so he headed to the bar. "What do you want?"

"I'm not old enough to drink. I thought they weren't going to let us in for a moment."

He rolled his eyes and glared as the man behind them looked her up and down. "You can have soda or water, moron, and I don't know what was up with that, but we're in."

"Oh." Janet shifted as she leaned her elbows on the bar, her back arching sweetly, pulling her shirt up a bit and he wanted to run his tongue from the little dimples at the small of her back on up her spine, his breath making her shiver, wanted to curl himself over her back and kiss her neck as he fucked her. "Water's fine."

"Huh?" Jack shook his head and rubbed at his temples as her words sank in. "Two waters," he told the young man behind the bar. He had things under control. He was fine. Janet was safe with him. He wasn't going to hurt her. Her curvy legs weren't going around his waist, or his shoulders, and they weren't going to get much farther apart than they were now, as she waited for her water patiently, holding a streaked lock of hair between her fingers and looking at the different colours in it. She'd get breathless tonight only if she was dancing; Jack would have nothing to do with it.

"Are you cold?" she asked. "You're shivering."

He rubbed his arms and looked toward the stage. "Maybe a little. It'll warm up when the concert starts." He was under control. Nothing wrong. Control. He sipped his water when it was handed to him and closed his eyes as it slid down his throat. She was wearing vanilla perfume; he liked vanilla. Had she sprayed it on? Or dabbed a little behind her ears, on her wrists? The insides of her elbows? Rachel sometimes even dabbed a bit behind her knees. Where would the scent be strongest on her?

Of course, Rachel put perfume on her ankles and behind her knees, at the small of her back, just to send Jack on a scent scavenger hunt, enjoying the way he snuffled at her skin, nipping and kissing as he went. Janet wasn't --- she didn't _know_ him well enough to do that. Didn't know he liked searching for the next sweet blossom on his lover's body. She wouldn't have done that, just girlishly spritzed herself with whatever cheap perfume Clarie's or Hot Topic had been selling that week.

That thought grounded him and he hadn't even realised he'd been assuming she was trying to seduce him. Maybe he wasn't as in control as he'd thought.

Jack glanced at Janet out of the corner of his eye as he raised his right hand and slid it up his left sleeve, digging his nails into his skin and dragging them down. The pain was sharp enough to cut through the mud in his brain and bring him a little more clarity. He'd have to call Rachel as soon as they got back to the mansion. He was slipping faster than he'd thought he would and he didn't like it, didn't want it to happen like this. Janet didn't need to bear the brunt of his increasing instability, his inability to keep himself under tight control. She was just a kid, for fuck's sake.

But _so_ eager to be a woman. Eager for _him_ to make her a woman. Oh, the _fun_ they could have together, and thank you, Harley, for channelling all his anger and pain into sex, thank you _so_ much, dear departed Harley, you were good for that one thing, at least ---

Jack dug his nails into his skin again and felt blood pool beneath his fingers. His mouth quivered at the pain and he closed his eyes against it. And now, now he was doing things to deal with himself that he hadn't done since Maria . . . he didn't want to remember. He didn't want to remember any of this. He didn't want the sex and pain and death to start blending together again. All Jack wanted was to hold his wife and baby girl and know that they were safe, from him and from the world.

Janet tugged on his arm and he jerked his head down at her, still floating on the pain in his arm. "Come on, let's get a good spot."

The hall was mostly a huge empty space with the stage at one end and on the other end, seating areas on two levels. The bar stretched halfway along the wall opposite the door. Everything was painted black, which made sense. Didn't want colours distracting from the band, after all. Jack let himself be dragged toward the front, staring at the curve of Janet's neck and how her pigtails bounced against it, playing peek-a-boo with her skin. He bit his lip. Hard. More people pressed in on all sides of them and Janet leaned close to him to keep from being separated.

"You okay?" she asked when she felt him tense up. She knew he only liked to be this close to people when it was on his own terms.

"I'm fine." It was the truth, surprisingly. He could feel the energy building in the room, fed off of it as he closed his eyes to slits and swayed a bit with the crowd.

The lights dimmed suddenly and in the hot darkness the gathered crowd went wild. Janet squealed next to him and bounced up and down, clinging to his arm as the drum beat started, low and primal. A violin joined in, soaring above and around the pounding of the drums and then a spotlight slowly lit up the figure in frills and leather in the centre of the stage. Her dark blonde hair was down around her shoulders as she started plucking at her guitar, swaying close to her microphone and breathing her low alto voice into it. She started speaking in rhythm, a low and steady rap, letting the music fill her voice.

"Her polished nails twirl matches. Her bare feet kick the ground. My lady sits there smiling, even when she frowns. . . . Find me a lover, who I can kiss from cheek to cheek, and I'll give you another reason that your knees are weak. . . . Her polished nails break flesh, her painted lips are smeared. My lady's striking smile contradicts her tears." She flipped her hair behind her and broke into the chorus, which made Jack choke even as he laughed. "_There's my lady, Glasgow baby, sitting on her porch with her Chelsea grin!_ Cutting for another mile, that Joker sports a sexy smile, makes you worth my time. Let's light you up another, gotta keep on running while we're in. Our. Prime."

Oh, the _irony_ of it was de_li_cious. That his favourite band would have a song all about _him_, mention him by _name_! Jack and Janet looked at each other as they laughed; it was really too much. They didn't pay too much attention to the lyrics that followed until the song was almost over.

"I'll go and find me a lover, who I can kiss from cheek to cheek. . . . I promise you, beautiful, I'll have myself another Glasgow baby . . . by the end of the week . . ."

It segued right into another song, one that screamed sex; Elizabeth Tess and one of the men in the band sang it together, their voices low and intimate. Once Jack got past the heavy beat and their panting voices, he was once more in stitches when he realised it was about rainbow smoothies and being sexed by vampires. Raped by Zombies certainly had a way of misleading their audience. He didn't think Janet had figured the lyrics out yet because she wasn't laughing, just swaying to the music and his mouth dried as he watched her hips. She knew exactly how to move to any beat --- of course she did. She _was_ a student of _his_, after all. But all he'd really done was help her hone a natural sense of rhythm.

She was getting a bit of male attention for it, too. Her own damn fault, what with that short outfit and skirt that made him glad she was wearing full-butt (if sparkly) panties. He eased behind her and pulled her back a bit, making it clear to the man looking at her that she was property of another.

"Take me with ease from my feet to my knees, I will please no one else but myself . . . You are the life-force, the lover and saviour. I offer my soul as the prize. Your cool lips corrupt with a kiss of desire, that would burn with the fire of delight. Take me and save me, I love you, I hate you, a taste then another another another . . . Stretch and taste sweeter each time that you meet her, she's reckless and gives as she takes . . ."

Janet blinked up at him long enough to verify that it was Jack who was holding her, then gave in to the music once more. She wasn't trying to tease him, but as he'd previously noted, her heels put her at the perfect height for it and Jack ground his teeth as he held her shoulders tightly.

". . . I would have more I would drink more I would eat more I would take more I would love more. I'll live more I would give more I would use more, so much more, so much very much more . . ."

He was trembling again and Janet covered his hands with her own, resting her head against his shoulder as she sang along with the one cover song Raped by Zombies had done. It was deliciously repetitive, the beat and rhythm pulling at him, letting him lose himself in it. It probably wasn't the smartest thing to do, but so long as Janet didn't more much more than she was, Jack figured he'd be fine. It was a good thing that Rachel hadn't come with him like he'd wanted her to. There were too many people in too confined a space; as far along as she was, she wouldn't have enjoyed herself at all.

After the concert was over, Jack turned around to see a brown-haired man in a security shirt standing behind him. He raised an eyebrow, noting that the man didn't flinch when his gaze passed over Jack's scars. Janet had pulled his scarf off at one point, wrapping it around her own neck.

"Jack Dawes?"

"Know of any other guy with these scars?"

The man nodded slightly. "Come with me, please. And the lady."

Jack tensed slightly as his eyes narrowed. "I don't think we've done anything wrong."

"You haven't," the man said. "I'm taking you backstage. If you've noticed, Miss Tess is a bit of a fan of yours."

Now Jack was amused and slid his arm around Janet's shoulders. "So, what, she wants an autograph?"

"Your babies, actually, but she'll settle for meeting you." the roll of his eyes and the expression on the man's face said that maybe he knew Elizabeth Tess personally. "Unless you're busy?"

He was still in a good place, feeling almost like he had a nice buzz. "No, not at all. Wanna meet Elizabeth Tess, Janet?"

"You have to _ask_?!" she exclaimed. Her brown eyes were huge with excitement.

"Guess not. All right," he told the security guard, "lead on."

They were lead backstage and through a door to what was apparently a dressing room. The guard rapped on the open door lightly. "Hollyn? Don't you dare freak out."

"Oh my God! He's here! He's here!" She came running out of another door and Jack's first impression was that she was a lot shorter than he'd expected. Her big blue eyes, looking almost like veined ice, were also as striking as they were in all the photos he'd seen of her --- no feat of Photoshop, those gems. But . . .

"You're so _short_," he blurted out as she skidded to a halt in front of him.

Those beautiful eyes got bigger. "Is that bad? I'm five foot-one! Well, almost. Near enough, in the mornings! I can put on heels if you want. Oh my God, the Joker's in my dressing room! Can I hug you? Will you marry me?!"

Her exuberance made Jack laugh and he slid an arm around her shoulder, his ego sufficiently stroked to put his own nerves about meeting Elizabeth at ease. "Not bad at all, peaches, and sure, I'll hug you." He oofed a little when she squeezed him as tightly as she could, squealing a bit. "It's uh, it's Jack, by the way. Joker hasn't been around for . . . about twelve years. Give or take. And I'm already married."

"Darn it! I don't care!" She grinned up at him, then looked at Janet. ". . . Hi. Who are you?"

"My foster daughter," Jack said as Janet recoiled a bit. He hugged her against him. "This is Janet."

Elizabeth looked her over, then looked at Jack, then turned a brilliant smile on Janet. "Hi! I'm Hollyn. Only my family and friends call me that, but you can, too. Jason! Get us something to drink! Here, have a seat!"

"I'm not your maid," the security guard said as he leaned in the doorway.

"Do it anyway! I'll tell Dad! Jason's my older brother," she told Jack and Janet as she sat them down, sitting as close to Jack as possible without being in his lap. "I recruited him for security while Henry's sick. My sister's back at the hotel; she whined that the latest album's too emo for her. And my other brothers aren't here; losers think their jobs are more important than my concert. Psh!"

She'd entered full-on starry-eyed fangirl mode and Jack encouraged it with his smiles and interested looks, completely amused at the cult following the Joker had accumulated during his absence from society. Hollyn was full of questions, wanting to know all about Rachel and the new baby (promising to write a song about it), proclaiming her jealousy that Janet and Susie got to see Jack every day. Jason brought them drinks and she mixed them eagerly while he watched.

"What do you want? Rum? Brandy?"

"Janet's not old enough to drink, and Rachel doesn't like it when I do . . . but some Jack and Coke, if you have it."

Hollyn grinned at Janet. "I'll make you my sister's drink. It's coconut rum with pineapple juice and grenadine; you can't taste the alcohol. Come on, it's all good!"

"I tried to name Ava after you," Jack said, just to watch Hollyn flip over it. "But Rachel liked Ava Mirelle more."

"Oh my God, you did?! I love you!" This time Hollyn _did_ end up in his lap, and she covered his face with kisses as he laughed at her. Jason cleared his throat and she guiltly slid back onto the couch, her legs still over Jack's. "Sorry. I'm a little excited. I've wanted to meet you for forever! Did you like Glasgow Baby?"

"Yeah, it was good. I mean, I haven't heard a song of yours that I didn't like." The other band members had gone back to the hotel after a cursory introduction; they hadn't been rude about it, but it was obvious that Hollyn carried the brunt of the obsession with Jack and the Joker.

"Awesome! Oh, I wish I could have met Rachel . . ."

"She's probably sleeping right now, but I'll tell her you said hi."

"Do that!" She was bouncing now, a small bundle of energy. "This is _so awesome_. Want more?" She mixed them both another drink without waiting for a reply and turned the conversation back to Jack's time as the Joker.

He answered her as honestly as he felt like, depending on what she wanted to know. Even Janet was interested, cradling her fourth drink as she and Hollyn listened with fascination to his version of burning up sixty-eight million dollars.

"I kinda wish now that I'd saved some of it. Rachel and I would certainly never have to work again, and Ava's college tuition would be paid for." Jack shrugged as he watched Janet's eyes glaze over contentedly. She was rocking side to side a bit, too, which meant the alcohol was making her dizzy and she liked the feeling. "I think it's past Janet's bedtime."

"Do you have to go?" Hollyn whined. Jason cleared his throat again as he deliberately started picking up the bottles of alcohol, then she covered her mouth as she yawned. "Do I have to get up in the morning?"

"If you want to make it to Toledo on time, yeah."

A muscle in Jack's eye twitched as he turned to Janet and gathered her in his arms. They all said goodbye, then he was settling Janet into the limo and closing the door on a teary-eyed Hollyn, who was promising that he'd get in to any concert of hers for free.

Janet had laid down once he'd let her go to close the door, and as he settled by her she turned and buried her head in his lap, looking up at him and humming lazily as she smiled. He hadn't really been paying much attention to how much she'd had to drink, and apparently she hadn't, either. That was the problem, he felt, with drinks that one couldn't taste the alcohol in. One drank them like water, or juice, and got trashed before one knew it.

"You're pretty," she giggled as she reached up to tug at his curls. "I want curly hair . . ."

"You're drunk," he said in a teasing voice while her fingers trailed against his cheek.

"I'm . . . no . . . yeah . . ." She trailed off, her eyes unfocusing again, then giggled. "I'd have babies with you . . ."

That made Jack laugh and he took her wandering hand to press a kiss to it. "I know you would."

Janet's eyes widened. "Am I that obvious? Did I throw myself at you? I didn't want you to know . . ."

"No, you weren't obvious, and no, you didn't throw yourself at me. It's all right." He shifted, trying to be subtle about moving her head lower so she wouldn't feel his hard-on against the back of it, and sighed as he lay his own head against the back of the seat. "It's all right."

But she'd scrambled up and was leaning in to him, her face dangerously close as he watched her from partially-closed eyes. "You don't hate me?"

"I don't hate you." He was whispering. Janet laughed and snuggled up to him, aiming a kiss at his cheek but landing it on his ear instead. Jack shuddered and his arm wrapped itself around her shoulders of its own accord.

"You're funny," she giggled again and kissed his ear once more, laughing as he shivered.

"Yeah, but looks aren't everything." Jack was still whispering as he tilted his head to the side, and Janet's next shiver-inducing kiss landed just below his ear. His fingers curled against her shoulder and fiddled with the bra strap he could feel under her shirt, and, encouraged in her clouded daze, Janet kissed his neck again as she rested one hand on his chest. Jack held very, very still. If he didn't do anything else, she might get bored and leave him alone. Too bad his other hand was now on her hip, pressing gently toward himself. He'd trained his students well and Janet moved with the slight pressure, straddling his own hips as she moved her kisses along his neck. Jack had the presence of mind to move his hands underneath her thighs and keep her from settling on him fully. He knew what feeling his erection against her did to a very horny Rachel, and wasn't ready to let that happen to a very inexperienced (not to mention intoxicated) Janet.

"I'm sorry," Janet murmured between kisses, moving her lips to the base of his throat and unbuttoning his shirt slowly. He was torn between wishing she was drunk enough to not know that what was happening was wrong and glad she wasn't. "Jack . . ."

She was far enough down his legs, almost to his knees, that Jack felt he could let her thighs go. He didn't want to, though. He tried to make his release of them quick but he knew his fingers lingered, pressing into her skin, because she gasped and trembled, wiggling a bit in the hopes of feeling his hands on her again. Her thighs clenched and unclenched a little and Jack knew what she was doing there, and he had to grab her upper arms to keep from finding out how wet she was. When she'd gotten his shirt unbuttoned and spread open across his chest, Jack thought for one instant that Janet was going to slip between his legs and keep kissing downwards, but even as his entire body stiffened in anticipation she moved back up, finally pressing their mouths together.

He loved the taste of her mouth as she slid her tongue against his, and wondered how she tasted between a different pair of lips. He bet she tasted fabulous. Then again, Jack could eat a woman out pretty much all day and not get tired of it, so he figured he was a bit biased in that regard. Janet's hands were curling in his hair and he grabbed her thighs again, pulling her against him. She moaned with the contact and arched her back, pressing her hips down and against his while he kissed down her own throat, biting gently, pleased when her gasp told him she liked it. His hands slipped up her thighs and pulled her tiny skirt higher, out of the way, and her stomach jumped when he ran his fingers over it. They moved higher until they cupped her breasts, already larger than Rachel's, and Jack squeezed gently as he moved his face down to nuzzle them. Her shirt didn't even cover the top of her lacy black bra, which didn't even cover the tops of her breasts, and Jack slid his tongue along the edges of the lace before dipping it underneath, his lips and tongue working until he'd gotten her nipple free where he could suck on it easily. Janet was making a lot more noise, so he reached over blindly and started the music player, drowning out her cries of pleasure as she thrust against him harder. Jack rolled his eyes up to watch her face as he moved to her other nipple, pinching the first one gently as he tongued her. Her breasts were _so_ much more sensitive than Rachel's and she was watching him even as her eyes tried to roll back in her head, and he laughed against her skin. He'd never been this intimate with a virgin, that he could recall. It was _so_ much _fun_.

He got tired of her inexperienced movements against him after a while. They didn't provide enough _stimulation_, and he was a man who liked a lot of stimulation. Verbal, visual, physical, mental . . . Jack slid down until he could roll them both over so that Janet was sitting on the seat and he was kneeling between her legs, pulling them up around his hips and taking a moment to adjust both of them so that he could comfortably rub against her. For her part, Janet clung to him and pulled his face up again, her kiss desperate. Jack was getting desperate, too, as he wrapped his arms around her back. He needed Janet to come as quickly as possible, because every minute she didn't brought him closer to ripping away the psychological barrier that her pretty panties represented and violating her. Jack wasn't a complete fool. He knew full well that he would go to jail if this incident got out, if Janet decided he'd assaulted her and told anyone. If he put any part of himself inside of her, he'd go to jail. He'd be there for the rest of his life and he'd be a registered sex offender, never allowed to see his baby girl, never allowed to hold her, or watch her grow up . . .

If Jack had had anywhere to run to, he would have stopped right then and fled. But in a moving limousine, there was no place to hide. He was stuck and he was damned already, so his best course of action was to ride it out _what a bad pun, even for him_ and get it over with as quickly as possible.

"_Fuck_," Jack snarled against Janet's breast. He pushed her back and watched himself thrust against her for a moment, then took her hand and put it over her panties. She looked at him in confusion. "Don't you masturbate?" he whispered harshly, panting.

"But I want you to ---"

"_No._" Her eyes widened and she sniffed a bit, so Jack leaned forward to cover her face with comforting kisses. "No," he said in a softer voice. "No, baby, I want to to watch _you_ do it. I like watching."

She turned redder, if that was possible, and smiled shyly as Jack leaned back again with a smile of his own. She pressed her fingers over her panties for a few moments before sliding them underneath, her eyes fluttering closed and her mouth opening in a small gasp as the slender digits found their way between her sensitive lips and to her clit. She arched her hips up into her own touch and Jack took up his thrusting once again, but more gently this time, just enough to keep himself hard --- not that that was a problem, not when he was watching Janet pleasure herself. She moved the hand on his shoulder to her own breast, which fascinated him. Rachel got too distracted by that sort of double stimulation; she needed to either be fingering herself or touching her breasts. That Janet could do both made Jack dizzy.

He frowned a bit when Janet took her hand out of her panties and pushed at his stomach, but when he moved back even more she went right back to work, and his eyes bugged out as he watched her slide a couple of fingers inside of herself. Damn girl knew how to get herself off. He loved it and he told her so, but wasn't sure she'd heard him. She was whispering his name, though, lost in some fantasy.

Jack couldn't stand it any more and leaned forward again, covering her fingers with his and pressing against her. He ghosted his lips over hers as she whimpered and moved her fingers back to her clit and he felt in need of a fucking medal for not replacing them with his own. He did press into her as much as her panties would allow, sucking on her nipple hard as he grunted with each thrust of his hips against her and his hand.

Janet suddenly threw her head back, her body going almost completely limp before tensing up again, clenching around the tips of his fingers, and she _squeaked_ rhythmically as she finally came. She fucking _squeaked_. Jack couldn't help but laugh at the tiny, high-pitched bursts coming from that glorious mouth, pulling back to watch the look of abandon on her pretty little face until her orgasm subsided. Then he was holding her, wrapping his arms around her back and waist and nuzzling her neck lovingly.

"Oh, God, Jack . . . I love you," she whispered as she stopped shaking. "I love you so much . . ."

"I know, baby," he whispered back. He stroked her hair and kissed her gently before taking her hand and licking it clean. He'd been right; she _did_ taste fabulous. It made him groan and shudder. "I'm so sorry, baby . . ." He hoped she didn't say a word about this, not even to her closest friends, not even to that fucking diary she wrote in all the time. He didn't want to get in trouble. He didn't want to be kept away from his baby girl. He didn't want Rachel to leave him and take Ava away. He needed his family. He _needed_ them. "I'm so sorry . . ."

But Janet was almost asleep as he gently fixed her clothing and cracked the window, forcibly reminded of Rachel's birthday four years previously. Maybe she'd feel regret once she woke up. Maybe she wouldn't. There wasn't anything Jack could do about it now. He settled her on the seat and sat next to her, bringing his knees up to his chest and holding them there as he fought off the urge to climb on top of her. She was on the verge of passing out, for fuck's sake. He wasn't _that_ much of a monster.

His phone buzzing brought him back to reality after a minute or so and he took it out of his pocket, where it had been on vibrate, and raised his eyebrows as he rubbed his eyes. No, there were twenty missed calls, the most recent from Rachel. What the fuck? He hit '2' for her speed-dial and was assaulted on the second ring.

"Jack Dawes! Where the _fuck_ have you been?! We've been calling you since eleven! Why haven't you picked up your fucking phone?!"

Rachel never swore. Something had gone terribly wrong. Jack's stomach clenched as he tried to think through the lust-induced fog in his brain. "Baby? It was on vibrate. What's ---"

She was _beyond_ furious and he reeled back a bit. "Don't you _dare_ ask me what's wrong, Jack! You get your ass _back_ to Bruce's and _on that fucking plane home right now_! Are you paying attention?! This is all your fault, Jack! Why the _fuck_ I didn't _make_ you talk with the FBI is beyond me!"

"Rachel!" Jack said loudly. She finally shut up. "Stop yelling at me, damn it! What the hell happened? Are you and the girls all right?"

"Oh, _we're_ just fine," she snapped acidly. "But you just _had_ to send Tom on a little recon mission, didn't you?! You just _couldn't_ go to the _authorities_ with what you knew, and now Tom's in the ICU at Metropolis General! I hope you're fucking _happy_, Jack! Your goddamn friend might _die_ because of _you_!"

That made Jack go cold and want to puke. "I didn't send him anywhere," he managed to get out. The limo was reeling around him and he tried not to black out. "I told him to wait. _What happened_?"

But Rachel had burst into tears and there was a shuffling before a man's voice came on the phone. "Jack Dawes?"

"Who the _fuck_ are you, and where the _fuck_ is my wife?" Jack snapped, suddenly furious that Rachel wasn't on the phone.

"Detective Daniels, Mr. Dawes. You remember me." His voice was cold.

Jack snarled as he hit the floor with his fist. "Yeah, I remember you. Give me to Rachel."

"She doesn't want to talk to you." Indeed, Jack could hear his normally level-headed wife screaming obscenities at him in the background. "Lieutenant Fine was dumped in front of the Loleta hospital around ten forty-five tonight. You apparently gave him information on the killer that you neglected to pass on to us," and his voice said he in no way believed Jack had just forgotten, "and he went to check out the address you gave him. He seems to have been ambushed, slashed, and dumped."

Jack stared at the tinted window as he digested this information. Fuck. Now Tom was out of the picture. The limo crawled to a stop and the door was yanked open immediately, Bruce pulling him out as Alfred leaned in for Janet.

"Withholding evidence is a felony, Dawes," Daniels continued.

"It wasn't evidence. I didn't know for sure they were there, and what would have happened if the FBI had been seen sneaking around? They've split, haven't they? Yeah, I bet they're long gone and if Tom had waited like I'd told him to wait, he wouldn't be where he is now. Give me my wife."

"I won't be your wife for long!" Rachel screamed out. Fucking speaker phone. "You better have somewhere else to sleep for the time being, you sick bastard!"

She didn't really mean that. Jack found himself surprisingly calm --- almost numb, in fact. He and Janet were loaded on the plane along with Bruce and Alfred, as well as some boy Jack had never seen before.

"Uncle Charles is with Mrs. Dawes, right?" he asked.

Bruce nodded. "She's meeting us at the airport, Dick." Everyone was glaring at Jack, except for Janet, who was dead to the world.

"You'll be under house arrest when you get here," Daniels was saying.

"My wife just kicked me out of the house," Jack replied.

"Chief Johnson and his wife have agreed to let you stay with them."

He was going to fuck that bitch over. He was going to cut her heart --- no, he was going to cut her _pussy_ out, her whorish pussy, and shove it down her throat. "Fine by me," he whispered into the phone. "Gotta go; we're taking off." He hung up and turned his phone off, staring up at the roof of the plane. He ignored everyone until they set down in Loleta and then he only looked at the small group gathered to meet them in order to find Rachel, but she wasn't there. For the first time since they'd met, Rachel wasn't waiting for him. It hit Jack hard and he didn't look at Jeff or Veronica as he was handed over to them.

Veronica took his elbow to get him in the car and his eyes slid over to her, and he leaned down. "I'm going to fuck you tonight," he whispered in her ear. "Bet Jeff's not gonna be home until dawn."

She shivered. "Shut up." But she liked the thought; bitch still thought he might leave Rachel for her, thought that if _Rachel_ left, he'd take her as a substitute. It would never happen. Let her dream. He needed a knife. Didn't have to be big, just sharp enough to leave a clean cut with little effort. His skin ached for it. Fucking, cutting . . . both provided him with a release from stress, and between his tryst with Janet and this sudden shit, Jack was a man in need of some serious stress relief.

"I want to see my wife," was the only thing he said during the ride to the Johnson's house.

"She doesn't want to see _you_," Jeff said coldly. "Will you be all right alone with him, Veronica?"

"I'll be fine," she said shortly.

And she would be. Sore, maybe, but he wasn't going to kill her. He needed to fuck her. He needed a warm, willing set of holes to lose himself in. He _wanted_ to have Rachel, but even if she hadn't been mad at him, he wasn't sure he could be gentle with her. So that left the whore in the front seat. Tomorrow he was going to track down Maury and Anita and butcher them. They wanted the Joker? They were about to get him, consequences be damned.

As soon as he'd been shown the guest room and Tom had left, Jack sprinted to the kitchen and started rummaging desperately, finally finding a knife that he could use. Veronica was in the doorway with her mouth open to ask a question, but he ignored whatever she was saying and grabbed her arm, dragging her up the stairs and throwing her into the room before kicking the door shut.

"What the hell are you doing?" she snapped from the bed. "This wasn't my fucking fault!"

"I know," he mumbled. He'd put the knife between his teeth as he pulled at his clothes, then tore at hers.

"Hey! Stop it, damn it!" Veronica fought back, hitting and scratching at him and Jack groaned, pressing into her nails before taking the knife from his mouth and pushing her down, holding it by her ear as he kissed her.

"Shut up," he muttered. "Just fuck me. You want to. Do it."

Veronica was wide-eyed as he rolled off of her and on to his back, watching her hungrily. Lust won out over caution and she finished taking her clothes off, crawling over him and covering his mouth with her own. He slid his fingers between her thighs until she was ready, then let out a sigh of relief when she finally settled on top of him and started rocking against him. She was watching the knife warily as he raised it, but Jack ignored her. He pressed the sharp edge against his shoulder and hissed as it broke skin, the sweet euphoria making him buck his hips up. Veronica gasped and decided that he wasn't a danger to her, giving herself over to riding him. Jack moved the blade to a new spot and made another cut, then another, and another, until his shoulders and chest were covered with paper-cut-sized wounds. He lost control and came when Veronica leaned forward to lick at the wounds gently, crying out as he grabbed her head and held her there.

She was still sucking at him when he finally passed out from exhaustion.

***

**A/N:** Still with me? All right. Thank you. I think it's obvious by now that Jack is losing his mind; or, at least, willfully letting himself behave more naturally. He's not mentally stable; he is, in fact, unstable. Violently so. Disturbingly so. No matter how many fluffy bunnies or how much _twu wub_ I put into this story, the fact is that the Joker as The Dark Knight portrays him is a violent, mass-murdering, not-burdened-with-a-conscience psychopath. What's been keeping him sane, amongst other things, is love, a sense of belonging and possessing, therapy, a buttload of medication, and mostly, a buttload of willpower.

What he did to Janet was wrong; it works with the story, but that doesn't make it right. She wasn't asking for it. She didn't deserve to have her trust in her foster father, the man who wants to adopt her if her mother dies, taken advantage of like that. Her being drunk simply makes that worse. I in no way condone what happened, and if any of you, dear readers, have been in a similar situation, my heart goes out to you and I hope you've found safety, support, and love.

I'm saddling these characters with a lot of problems that aren't going to be worked out by the time this fic ends. They will, however, be addressed in the next story; when I start posting it, I'll put up a note here with the link to it. I hope you still appreciate my writing enough to read it. It won't be as dark as this fic.


	25. Chapter 25

Soft tapping pulled him from a sleep that had been marred by some of the worst nightmares he'd had in years. He jerked awake, not knowing where he was, if he was in danger, or even who he was; the weapon he reached for wasn't there, and his chest and shoulders ached. He glanced down at them and managed to spot the Band-Aids scattered over his skin, even if there seemed to be alternating amounts of them before he squeezed his eyes shut once more. The tapping came again and he ignored it, curling into a tight ball, his arms around his knees, soaked in sweat and his stomach twisting. His life was over. Janet was going to tell Charles, or Rachel, or the police . . . She was going to tell _somebody_ what he'd done to her --- it was the only sensible thing for the girl to do, after all --- and he was going to go to jail. Rachel was going to leave him. She was going to take Ava with her, and he'd never, ever see his baby girl. He'd never get to hold her, he'd never get to watch her grow up. He'd be a registered sex offender; of course he'd never be allowed to see his child. Rachel would hate him. She'd leave him alone and there would be no reason for him to be, to exist, and he'd slowly disappear back into the oblivion he'd come from.

Panic gripped him and Jack gasped in air until he couldn't stand it and then threw the covers off, rolling onto the floor with a thud and crawling to the bathroom. He barely made it in time and huddled tightly against the toilet seat as he heaved up the contents of his stomach. There wasn't much there. Jack heaved until the bile stopped, then dry-heaved until he thought he'd puke out his entrails.

Once his stomach had subsided he curled on his side and shook on the floor, unheeding of the taste in his mouth. His head was hurting worse than ever; he'd had migraines before, but this pain surpassed those by far. Every heartbeat made his head throb, a blinding pain that brought white spots to his tightly closed eyes, spots that sliced into his brain and made him whimper. His soft mewls caused more throbs, more killing spots, more whimpers, a cycle that repeated until Jack grabbed fistfuls of hair and screamed in agony. His scream choked off to a sob and tears scalded his cheeks, and he slipped into a semi-haze until gentle pressure on his ankle roused him from his stupor.

"Jack . . ." Veronica. A whine wriggled its way out of his throat as she rubbed his foot and murmured his name again, and he forced one eye partially open.

"Not such a catch anymore, huh?" he croaked out.

The corners of her eyes tightened but she ignored his comment. "Get up and get in the shower; there are people here to see you."

"I'm not going to leave Rachel for you. Even if _she_ leaves, I won't take you instead. I don't want you."

"It's amazing how often I've heard that," she replied dryly. "Now get up and get clean."

Jack watched as she stood and started the shower, then toed at him until he'd pulled himself into the tub. He hissed as the hot water slid under his Band-Aids and stung the cuts there, but gladly welcomed the pain as punishment. Veronica waited until he'd dragged himself up and was washing himself off, leaning heavily against the shower wall, and then left. People to see him. He didn't know what time it was, but it had to be the police. They would take him into custody, get the information they wanted about Anita and Maury, and then throw him in jail for molesting Janet. Rachel would yell, and Rachel would scream, but what broke Jack's already battered and bruised heart the most was the thought of the tears she would cry as she realised that the man she loved was a monster through and through, never able to change.

He was on his knees, his forehead pressed against the bottom of the bathtub as he sobbed, when the water started running cold. He didn't want to face Rachel. He didn't want her to have to pay for his constant mistakes. He'd been a fool to stick around after Harleen's death --- maybe he'd been a fool to be in this world in the first place. He'd just . . . wanted a _chance_.

Finally, shivering, Jack rose up and turned the shower off out of reflex. His clothes were sitting on the toilet seat, clean and folded --- no lingering traces of sex on them from either of last night's women. Why was he only capable of remorse after the fact? He took and took and took, used people up like they were nothing, and only once he was in trouble for his actions did he feel badly about them.

Veronica was talking as he started a slow, heavy trudge down the stairs. For a moment he thought Rachel was there, but of course Rachel wasn't. She hadn't been there last night, when the plane had landed. She'd said she wasn't going to be his wife for long; she was probably drawing up divorce papers in the office. That thought brought another stab of physical agony to Jack's chest and he moaned a little as he swerved into the banister. He took a moment to steady himself, head lowered and curls in his face, before concentrating on the next step down.

"Go on, sweety."

". . . Daddy?"

That wasn't Susie's voice. It couldn't be. It couldn't be her small feet on the stairs, either, because Rachel would never bring the child around him again. Because Jack was so sure that the small hands grabbing at his couldn't possibly be there, he felt it perfectly reasonable to sit down and gather the apparition into his arms, burying his face in her shoulder as he sobbed.

Her voice was small, frightened. "Daddy, let's go home. We're here to take you home, Daddy."

That made him cry harder. He shook his head. "I can't," he whispered hoarsely. "I can't."

Tiny hands touched his face, pet his cheeks. "But you have to come home, Daddy. Rachel says you're sick, and I have to take care of you. I brought your medicine. Rachel says you'll get better once you take it."

"Rachel hates me, baby," he murmured as auburn curls tickled his nose. "She doesn't want to see me anymore."

"No, Rachel loves you. You just have to take your medicine." She shrugged out of her small backpack and held it in her lap, unzipping it and pulling out a bag of pills and a sippy cup that sloshed with liquid. "See? I brought your medicine for you. Please take it, Daddy." Cupid lips quivered and blue eyes filled with tears as she tried to get him to take the pills. "Please?"

Jack raised his eyes to Rachel, whose own eyes were hollow and bloodshot. She looked like she hadn't slept at all and had been crying all night, and she probably had. More tears, all _his_ fault, ran down her cheeks as she watched him and Susie from the bottom of the stairs. Veronica was looking uncomfortable by the front door.

"Please, Jack, come home," Rachel whispered. Her hand was white as it clutched the banister. "Take your pills and come home."

"You don't want me to," he muttered as Susie forced pills into his mouth. She held the sippy cup to his lips and tipped it until he had to drink or have the orange juice dribble down his chin. Jack swallowed the pills and shuddered when Rachel rubbed her stomach in a small circle. She did that when Ava was moving, and he didn't think she even noticed when she did.

"I'm sorry, Jack," she told him, choking on her words as she cried. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it. I was mad, Jack. I wasn't thinking. I need you to come home."

He held Susie tighter and rested his forehead against her shoulder. She hugged him and pet his hair. "So I can sign divorce papers?"

Rachel's sob at his assumption was audible. "No," she whimpered. "No, so you can be a father, Jack. So you can be a husband. I need you to come home, Jack. Tom woke up this morning and told the FBI that you didn't send him to Folsom, that he went on his own. Helna and Mitzi are at the house; Mitzi's been crying for you. Please, Jack, let's just go. I love you."

"You're better off without me. I should die."

"Damn it, Jack," Rachel cried, "I need you! _Ava_ needs you! Janet and Susie need you! I'm so sorry, Jack, I didn't mean what I said!" She was taking the stairs one step at a time, panting as she sobbed. "I didn't mean it. I'm sorry."

"You haven't done anything wrong," he insisted. She sat next to him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, and he tensed at the contact. "I can't . . . Janet . . ."

"She told me," Rachel said softly. Jack's head whipped around to stare at her in shock. Janet had _told_ her what he'd done, and she wasn't _angry_?

Then his eyes narrowed. "She told you what happened?"

His Rachel nodded. "She feels terrible about it, Jack."

"She didn't do anything _wrong_. It's _my_ fault --- what did she _tell_ you?"

Rachel was kissing his shoulder and rubbing his arms. "That she got drunk and came on to you before passing out. I'm not mad at you for that, Jack, and I'm not mad at Janet. I just need you to come home with me."

Janet had . . . lied? _Why_? Susie was sniffling, trying to be strong and failing, and Jack got physically dizzy as his world once more drastically rearranged itself. He had to talk to Janet, find out why she'd lied to protect him.

"Sweety, please . . ."

The fight went out of him and Jack closed his eyes. "Okay. I . . . Okay." Susie looked up hopefully and he forced his lips into a smile for her benefit. "Let's go home, pumpkin."

She jumped up and put the sippy cup away, zipping her backpack and taking one of his hands in both of hers as she tried to tug him up. Jack wasn't sure what to make of his new situation, so he defaulted into obedience until he could get his mind organised. He reached for Rachel automatically and stopped, his hand hovering at her elbow as she manoeuvred down the stairs. He needed to touch her, but wasn't sure if she wanted him to. For the first time in almost four years, Jack was afraid to touch Rachel, afraid of her pulling away.

She looked over at him and then leaned into his shoulder gently, resting just enough of her weight on him so he had to wrap his arm around her waist to readjust his centre of balance. A soft sigh escaped both of them as the solid physical contact; it was what they --- what Jack --- desperately needed.

"Pick me up," Susie wanted as soon as they were at the bottom of the stairs. She held her arms up, tugging at Jack's shirt.

"Susie, Jack's not well enough ---"

"I can do it," he cut Rachel off quietly. "If . . . it's all right."

She looked at him for a long moment before nodding. When Helna had called her last night and told her about Tom, she'd been furious with Jack. She'd been out of her mind with anger, yelling and sobbing, throwing his clothes into a suitcase with the firm intention of sending him back to Gotham. She'd been determined to go in to her office early today and draw up divorce papers. Charles had wrestled the suitcase out of her hands and held her down on the couch as Rachel had screamed, and when she'd collapsed into sobs her friend had held her tightly. She'd very gently asked Rachel what she thought a separation --- just a separation --- would do to Jack, not mentioning anything about Rachel's threatened divorce. Rachel hadn't cared for a while, but once she'd stopped crying, Charles had asked once more what Rachel thought a separation would do to her husband.

Watching Jack now, Rachel realised that it would have killed him. She provided him a stability that he wasn't able to produce on his own. She gave him . . . a place. A purpose. Reason.

She'd been perfectly within her right to be angry with him; she was still upset that he hadn't told the FBI about Anita and Maury. But to fly off the handle like that, to _tell_ him she was leaving, to threaten to destroy his entire world . . .

"Glad you're back," Charles said as she held the car door open.

Rachel got in the back seat with Jack and Susie and placed her palm on his cheek, gently turning him to look at her as he buckled up. His eyes were as red as she knew her own were, and the warmth had seeped out of them, leaving them haunted and wounded. She didn't know what to say to make it better. All she could think to do was pull him down into a gentle kiss, curling her fingers in the hair at the base of his neck and not letting him pull back. After a moment's resistance he melted into her and held her tightly, pressing his hands into her stomach and murmuring into the kiss as Ava responded.

Ava. Their little accident. Their daughter. The second best thing to ever happen to Jack. Jack was going crazy. Rachel didn't know why it had taken so long for her to recognise the signs, but Jack was slowly, surely, slipping back into insanity. She just didn't know _why_. No, she _knew_ why --- the murders and her pregnancy. But what would him regressing accomplish? Unless that was what Anita and Maureen wanted. But . . . _why_?

"Let's move to California," she whispered when Jack finally let her go.

He was resting his lips against hers and blinked. "Huh?"

"Let's move to California. After we adopt the girls, we'll all go to California. What do you think?" Anything to get him away from the people who wanted to hurt him, who were taking her husband away from her.

He was staring at her in confusion. "I . . . _why_?"

So _they_ couldn't find them. So her family could be safe. So Jack could finally have a chance at a normal life. Rachel just sighed and pulled Jack down to cradle his head on her bosom. His own sigh warmed her through her shirt. "You don't have to do this," she whispered into his hair as she kissed the top of his head. Susie was curled up on his other side, his arm around her shoulder. "Please don't do this, Jack. We need you."

"They're not going to stop coming after me," was his reply. "They're never going to leave me alone."

"Then let's go _away_. Let's just _go_, Jack."

He shook his head. "They'll find me. I don't want anything but to be with you and the girls, but they'll find me wherever I go, Rachel. They're not going to stop. If they can't get me directly, they'll come after you and the girls. Where's Janet?"

"At home. Bruce and Dick are with her. She's safe."

Jack sighed. He didn't know if Rachel truly thought that, or if she was in denial about the safety of their dysfunctional family unit. He stared down at Ava as he spoke. "I ran into Harleen's parents in Gotham."

Even pressed against her chest, Jack could barely hear his wife's whisper. "What happened?"

"They . . . want us to call them if we need them. They want to be there for us. I told them okay."

She was quiet for a while, running her palms over his shoulders and back, sometimes trailing her fingers through his curls as she pressed kisses to his head. Finally, "I'm glad."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," she murmured. "I know it must have been hard for you to talk to them."

He'd done good, then. Jack relaxed a microscopic bit. "Well, you'd said you wanted Ava to have more grandparents than Bethy, so . . . I have their number."

Janet wasn't going to be able to have normal relationships if she was living with him. He would always be there, just out of reach, and that would drive her crazy. He didn't know why Charles' nephew was there, what he had to do with Bruce or this whole situation. Who was Maria, and why couldn't he remember someone so obviously important to him? He hated his father. His drunken, abusive father who yelled and screamed and hit and threw things and killed puppies when he was bad. He hated him. He hoped he was dead. He didn't want to turn out like the man; he just wanted a place in society. He wanted people to not shy away from his scars. Fucking scars, the result of a mob job gone wrong in 2006. Where had he gotten his scars, people wanted to know? When he told them, he wasn't being literal.

Bruce pulled him out of the car and handed him to Charles, then reached back in and helped Rachel out. Jack's head swerved around to watch; she was pale, sweating with exertion from just standing up, her hand rubbing her stomach as she winced.

Jack was beside her, taking her in his arms and tilting her chin up. "What's wrong?" he asked. "Are you and Ava all right?"

She wasn't meeting his gaze and he tilted his head to follow her eyes. "I just need to rest," she whispered. "I'm just," a wince, "tired."

Bruce and Charles were looking too worried for that excuse. Jack shook his head as concern for his wife and daughter overshadowed his depression, and helped her up the porch steps and into the house. The couch was made up like a bed, and her latest book was resting on the coffee table.

"Rachel, tell me what's wrong."

She sat down and leaned her head back against the couch, closing her eyes as Jack sat next to her and fussed. "I'm just . . . Phillip wants me to rest more, is all." He'd taken one look at her as she'd gone into the office today and ordered her to go back home; bed rest until further notice. "And . . ." If she didn't word this carefully, Jack would flip out. "Practice."

"Practice what?"

"For birth." Rachel opened her eyes and looked at him as he tried to figure out what she was saying. "They're called Braxton-Hicks contractions, Jack, and they're not real. They're my body getting ready for real contractions. They're normal; nothing's wrong."

He'd gone paler and placed his hands on her stomach like he thought he could hold Ava inside. Brown eyes filled with fear as Jack draped himself carefully, protectively, over her body. "But you're all right? Ava's all right? Do we need to go to the hospital? How much rest do you need? What do you want me to do?"

Maybe if he was worrying about her and Ava, he wouldn't slip away from her. Rachel smiled at him and trailed her fingers down his cheek. He unconsciously leaned into the contact. "We're fine, Jack. Phillip just wants me to rest at home for a while; he didn't say how long. I'll let you know when we need to go to the hospital." She pulled him closer, making sure their eye contact wasn't broken and they were touching as much as possible. "But I need you here, Jack. I need _you, here,_ to take me when it's time to go. Okay? You have to be the first to hold Ava when she's born. Promise me, Jack. Promise me you'll do that."

He wanted to. He wanted to hold Ava after she was born; he'd dreamt about it --- him in those stupid green scrubs that hospitals made new fathers wear, with his hair under a little cap, Ava bundled in a tiny blanket as she slept, nestled securely against his chest . . . But he couldn't make that promise. He didn't know if Jack would be there.

"I promise," Jack whispered. Anything to help Rachel.

Her fingers ran through his hair, nails dragging along his scalp. "You'll be a good father, Jack," she insisted gently. "You won't be anything like the man who raised you. You're better than him. We just need to get past this, and you'll be fine. Ava's going to adore you."

Jack blinked tears out of his eyes and turned his attention to settling her on the couch. When he was done, Rachel was almost asleep, and he crouched down to kiss her lips and savour the taste.

"Thank you," he whispered. "Thank you for saving me."

She murmured an "I love you" that he echoed, then left her under Charles' supervision and went through the kitchen to Janet and Susie's room, where he knocked on the door. The music that had been playing stopped and after a moment the door opened to reveal a haggard-looking Janet. Her eyes widened and she started blushing, but stood her ground. Jack looked down at his feet.

"Can we talk?"

"Everything's fine. I'm fine." She said it too quickly.

"Let's talk," Jack insisted. "Please." Janet hesitated and he looked up at her. She sighed and eased out of the room. "Let's go outside." The dock would do. It was far enough away that no one could hear them, and she could push him into the ocean if she felt like it. He'd even be able to get back to shore. Once there, Jack leaned against one of the pillars and watched the girl. "Why did you lie?"

"I didn't lie. I came on to you, you said no, I passed out. That's what happened."

"That's not what happened, and you know it." She did, too. She still wanted him. Jack crossed his arms over his chest. "Why did you lie?"

"Because I'm not losing anyone else!" Janet suddenly screamed at him, the flush on her cheeks he'd taken for desire now one of rage. She was snarling at him, throwing her arms around in frustration. "I'm not losing Susie! I'm not going into foster care, damn it! I am _not_ going to lose the _only_ family I _fucking_ have, Jack! If you want to come into my room _every night_ after Susie crawls in with you and Rachel, you can do it! I'll let you!" Now she was crying, punching his chest as hard as she could and Jack let her as the winter wind threw the ocean spray into their faces. "Do whatever you want to me, Jack, because _I can not lose anything else_. Oh, God, I just . . . I'm sorry! It was all my fault. If I, if I hadn't had so much to drink, if I'd kept my hands to myself ---"

Now Jack grabbed her arms and shook her, something in him snapping. "My lack of control is _not_ your fault, Janet!" The storm coming in was going to be a nasty one. Jack was yelling just to be heard over it, now. "You're sixteen, Janet! I'm almost forty! I'm old enough to be your father! It doesn't matter _how_ much you drank or _how_ much you begged or _what_ you did with your hands! All that matters is that _I_ didn't tell you _no_! _I_ didn't move to the front seat, and _I_ didn't keep _my_ hands off of you! _You_ shouldn't have to suffer for _my_ mistakes, Janet!"

The girl was sobbing as rain started pelting them. She leaned into his grip and grabbed his wrists as she stared up at him. "Don't send me away!" she begged over the storm. "Please let us stay! We need you, Jack! Please . . . Don't abandon us!"

That one word hit him like a ton of bricks and he pulled the girl against him, wrapping her in his arms as they shivered in the rain. She sobbed into his chest. He'd begged someone like that, too, once upon a time. He'd begged to be allowed to stay, to be a part of a family, but the system had rolled right over him and he'd been packed off to another house, one with less laughter and more tears. He'd learned to not care after that. He wasn't going to let that happen to Janet and Susie.

Finally Jack pulled away enough to cup Janet's cheeks in his hands and look into her eyes. "You're not leaving," he said firmly, "and I'm not going to touch you. You don't have to whore yourself out to stay, Janet. I don't . . . I'm sorry. I'm sorry I hurt you." She reached her own hands up to run them through his hair and for a moment he was terrified she was going to kiss him, but the girl simply closed her eyes and rested her cheek against his chest. Jack breathed a sigh of relief and then led her back to the house, where the boy --- Dick --- was waiting for them with two huge towels that were fresh out of the dryer. Jack bundled Janet up first, then shooed her into the bathroom in her room to take a hot shower before turning to the boy.

Jack was offered a hand. "I'm Dick."

He took it. "Jack." He kept staring until the boy blinked. "What happened?"

The boy gave him a sharp look. "Tom ---"

"To you."

Blue eyes tightened at the corners. "What do you mean?"

"Charles never said she had a nephew."

"You need your own shower, Jack ---"

"Where are your parents?" he pressed. "You can't be much older than Janet."

"I'm sixteen," the boy admitted, "and my parents are dead. Charles and Bruce took me in."

Jack's lips twisted mirthlessly. "Well, aren't we a group of placeless freaks?" he asked softly. "Which one are you?"

Again, the tightening of the eyes. "What do you mean?"

"That whole Justice Club thing. Which one are you?"

"I don't know ---"

"Don't fucking lie to me, Dick," Jack said tiredly. "Just tell me which one you are. I know Bruce and Charles are the Batsy Twins. Who are you?"

". . . Robin."

He sighed. "You look ridiculous in your Spandex," was all he said as he trudged upstairs. He could hear soft singing, and his Mitzi-thing crying softly, and shivered in his warm towel as he stopped at the doorway of he and Rachel's room. Helna was rocking her daughter as she sang some Hebrew song, trying to calm her down.

His Mitzi-thing kept crying, for Tom and for Jack, and then she looked over at the door and her eyes got big. Her wails increased in volume, but now she was reaching out for Jack.

"Ja-Ja! Ja-Ja! Mama, Ja-Ja! Up! Dada?"

Helna looked up and Jack took half a step back. Regardless of what Tom had said, it Iwas/I his fault the man was in the hospital, and Helna had every right to hate him. The Mitzi-thing was struggling to be let go as her mother stared at him.

"Helna . . ."

She burst into fresh tears as she let her daughter go, and the girl-child toddled over to him as fast as she could, grabbing his pants and demanding to be picked up. Jack grabbed her just as she was about to fall onto her rump, lifting her easily and holding her close.

"I'm sorry, baby," he murmured as he sat next to Helna. His girl-thing clung to him and finally stopped crying, jabbering her toddler nonsense at him as she touched his wet face and hair and giggled. "I'm so sorry." He slid his free hand around Helna's shoulders and she leaned into him while she sobbed. "I'm sorry."

"Why did you tell him where they were?" the woman asked. "Why didn't you tell the FBI?"

Why had he almost gotten her husband killed? That was what she was really asking. "I didn't know they were there for sure," Jack murmured as the girl-thing kissed his nose and kept gabbing, content to be in his arms. "I told him to wait, Helna. I didn't think he'd go out there alone. I . . . I was going to go with him when I got back. I know how they work," he went on in anticipation of her next question. "They wouldn't have hurt him as long as I was there, and they wouldn't have tried to take _me_ if _he_ was there. I'm sorry."

"I hate you," the Jewess whispered. "I hate you so much . . . You're soaking wet, Jack. You're going to catch a cold."

He pressed a kiss to his girl-thing's forehead and gnashed his teeth to make her giggle. "I'm supposed to take a bath."

"Then go, you moron," Helna sniffled. "Mitzi, come to Mama. Jack has to take a bath."

"Baff?" The child's face lit up and she squirmed out of Jack's arms, lifting her dress up and throwing it to the floor, running out of the room in her diaper. "Baff!" She ran back in, diaper-less, and pulled at Jack's hand.

Jack stared at her, then looked helplessly at Helna. The woman couldn't help but laugh. "You can't take a bath with him, Mitzi. Come here."

The tiny face scrunched into a scowl and the baby tugged at Jack's hand again. "No! Ja-Ja! Baff!"

"Mitzi ---"

"_No_!" The child started wailing.

Jack patted her head. "Uhm . . . I don't care . . ."

Helna sighed. "You're not going to fall asleep, are you?"

He shook his head. "Not if Mitzi's in there with me."

"Bubbles!" the thing demanded.

Helna watched him for a few more moments before nodding. "Fine, fine, go take a bath."

"I mean," Jack said, "you can sit with us, if you're worried."

Helna shook her head. "No, I need to check on Rachel."

"Tell me the truth, Helna," he whispered. "How bad is she?"

The woman frowned and pursed her lips. "She's supposed to be on bed rest until further notice. Phillip wants to see her tomorrow to do a check-up, but he's mostly concerned that she's not getting enough rest. She's been really stressed."

"But if she rests more," Jack pushed as they got up and went to the bathroom, "will she and Ava be all right?"

"Probably. I mean, resting will help a lot. Rachel's . . . not young, in terms of childbearing. She needs to be more careful." Helna watched as the tub filled, Mitzi already sitting in the water and laughing as Jack poured bubbles in for her. "_You_ need to be more careful."

"I'm trying," Jack whispered. "When's Tom getting released?"

"Next week. They beat him up pretty good, but the doctors are more worried about infection."

"Jerk always did want to be more like me."

She produced a laugh that was mingled with a sob. "I'm sure that's what this is all about."

Jack looked up at her and let her touch his scars. "They can fix the scars for him," he whispered.

"I know. I don't care what he looks like; I just want him home."

Someone had cared what _Jack_ had looked like. It was good that Rachel didn't. He sighed as Helna left, then took his clothes off and rolled his eyes when the Mitzi-thing squealed and covered her eyes, giggling.

"What's so funny?" he asked her as he slid into the tub and blew bubbles into her face.

"Pee-pee!" she cackled as she reached for him.

"Not yours!" Jack grabbed her hand and shook his finger at her. "Don't touch!" She just giggled and splashed water at him. "I've had just about enough of women crawling all over me, thank you. Brat."

She scrunched her lips and nose at him. "No brat! Ja-Ja brat!"

"You think so?" he asked as she crawled into his lap for a hug.

"Yes!"

"Well, maybe you're right. I'm a brat. But you love me, don't you?"

She blew a raspberry on his shoulder and howled with laughter. "Love Ja-Ja!"

Jack finally smiled as he tickled his girl-thing. "I love you, too, baby."


	26. Chapter 26

Jack woke up with a horrible crick in his back, Rory laying across his legs and purring with delight that he'd gotten Jack into such an uncomfortable position (an assumption on the human's part, but probably true), and Rachel's hand covering his face. She was still asleep and he took a moment to kiss her palm before easing into a sitting position. He'd let Bruce and Charles stay in their room with the firm admonition to stay _out_ of the bondage gear, much to their mutual disgust, and getting under Bruce's skin had made him feel better. Helna, afraid to stay home by herself, had been put in Ava's room along with Mitzi, and Dick was sleeping on the love seat.

He hated them for being in his personal space. He hated all of them, and had to run to the kitchen to throw up in the sink before he could think through the sudden red haze across his vision. Rory followed him and curled around his feet in the hopes of either getting food or tripping him. The cat was still purring as Jack rinsed his mouth out and then grabbed some orange juice to get rid of the taste of bile.

"Shut up," he muttered before stumbling back to the living room. He had to blink a few times before he jumped a little and stepped back. "Damn it, Susie, why are you hiding there?"

All he'd seen over the edge of the couch were her big blue eyes, the rest of her covered in a blanket. She winced and he heard her sniffle. "Are you still sick, Daddy?"

He shushed her as he peeked at Rachel and then picked her up, taking her into the kitchen and sitting at the table. "I'm . . . yeah. I am. I'm sorry I snapped at you, tootsie roll."

"I'm sorry I scared you, Daddy."

He sighed and wiped at his eyes. "Why are you calling me Daddy?"

She was pouting, her lower lip pushed out and quivering a bit. "Rachel said I could, because you're my Daddy now that Mommy's gone."

Oh. Yeah. That. Jack smiled out of reflex when the child felt his forehead and cheeks with the backs of her hands, hm-ing to herself. She didn't know how to feel for a fever but she was trying, and her small hands felt good, cool against his skin.

"Are you hungry?" he asked.

She nodded. "Yeah. Can I have cereal?"

"If we have any." Jack honestly couldn't remember if they had food in the house, or if they had enough. He got up, settling Susie on his hip, and went to the cupboard to check. "Frosted Flakes, yum. Or . . . What is this? Whole grain . . . crap. We want Frosted Flakes, don't we?"

Susie giggled. "That's a bad word, Daddy."

"I know." He pulled the box out and set it on the counter, then opened the fridge and looked in. "Just soymilk. That woman's trying to kill me."

"Rachel says that milk is bad for you, that all the protein sucks up all the good stuff. She says it's supposed to make a baby cow into a big fat cow, and ---"

"Rachel sure thinks she knows a lot, doesn't she?" Jack mused.

"She knows a bunch!" Susie was nodding enthusiastically. "She's smarter than you are, Daddy."

That made the man laugh. "Yeah, I suppose she is. But she doesn't know how to blow stuff up like I do. So she doesn't know everything."

Susie thought about that as she watched Jack pour the cereal into two bowls, followed by the soymilk. "Well . . . That's why she's the boss of you. She has you to know stuff she doesn't need to know."

"Really? That makes sense." He took the bowls, adding spoons, to the table and sat down again. "But who am I the boss of?"

She shrugged. "No one."

He laughed again. "No one? Not even you? I thought Daddies were the bosses of their kids."

"Well . . . Maybe you're the boss of me, but Rachel's the boss of you, so really Rachel's the boss of me. I don't have to do what you say if Rachel says I don't." She munched contentedly on her cereal.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Well." She had a point, but he ignored it in favour of his own cereal. He brought his spoon down on Susie's when she tried to dip it into his bowl. "Hey, you've got your own."

"But you say food tastes better when you steal it from someone else." Susie tried again, and again he fended her off. "Remember? When you take my food, that's what you say."

"But I'm bigger, so I can fight you off."

She didn't like that, glaring up at him. "That's not fair!"

"Life's not fair, Susie." Jack kissed her nose and let her eat his cereal. "Does it taste better?"

"World peace has been achieved!" was her declaration.

Jack laughed as he picked her up, stood, and set her back down. "Great. Keep eating, peaches. I'm going to check on Rachel." He got a chirpy acknowledgment and went back to the living room, kneeling next to Rachel and brushing some hair out of her face before kissing her cheek. He wanted to wake her up with licks and kisses all over her body, take her into the bath where she'd be most comfortable and make love with her, wash away everything he'd done, all the promises he'd broken, but she needed to rest. All he let himself do was kiss down her neck, pulling down the tank top of his that she was wearing to place gentle kisses over the swell of her breast. She sighed and twisted a little.

"Jack, what are you doing?"

"Kissing you?" he guessed.

Her fingers tugged gently at his hair. "Jack, we have guests over. Dick's right there."

They were both whispering. "So, be quiet." He flicked his tongue over her nipple and then held it there, making a slightly surprised face. "What the . . ." Rachel squeaked when he started sucking gently at her breast; he'd teased her about having beer-flavoured nipples, but this was _different_. This was . . . sweet. Almost like honey. He liked it.

She tugged at his hair, harder, trying to pull him away. "Jack, stop. Knock it off. Ohhhhh . . ."

"I thought breast milk started after birth," he murmured briefly.

"It does," Rachel panted. She pinched his cheek, but he wasn't about to leave her alone. "Stop it, Jack, I'm serious."

"What is this, then? Practice milk?"

"Colostrum, and yes, essentially." Now she was pushing at his shoulders before pulling him against her again, which made Jack chuckle.

"What are you doing, Jack?" Susie wanted to know from the other side of the couch.

He stopped and rolled his eyes up to meet her curious blue ones, then slowly let Rachel's nipple go and covered her breast again as Rachel groaned in embarrassment. "Uh . . ."

The girl tilted her head at him, resting her chin on her hands. "I thought only babies drank milk from their mommies."

"Uh . . . I'm just, uhm . . . making sure it's working." Jack nodded quickly and patted Rachel's breast. "Yep, all working, ready for Ava when she's born."

"Does it taste good? Can I taste it?"

His wife had pulled her blanket over her head, shaking with laughter and leaving Jack all alone. He chewed his lower lip as he tried to think. "Uh . . . It tastes . . . Uhm . . . No, no, you can't taste it, Susie, and it tastes like, uhm, kinda like honey."

"Jack!" was the muffled protest from the blanket and pillow that covered Rachel's head.

"Well, it does," he defended himself, rubbing her stomach. "Susie, wanna make Rachel some breakfast? I bet she and Ava would like that. Why don't you get some potatoes out and start washing them off, okay? I need to, uhm, sit here for a bit. Go. Now." The kid didn't look like she trusted his intentions, but turned and tromped back to the kitchen. Jack leaned down and picked up the edge of the pillow to glare at Rachel's sniggering face. "You could have helped me out, there."

"Why?" she giggled. She was still blushing. "You deserved that, Jack. You're lucky she didn't walk in on anything else."

"Aren't we all?" the loveseat muttered. Jack pulled back to glare at Dick as he sat up, almost as red as Rachel was.

"Look, kid, get out of my house if you don't like it. I'll get it on wherever I want to, you hear me?"

"Stop it," Rachel told him firmly. He looked down a her and softened, tugging the pillow and blanket off of her to cover her face with kisses as she laughed and held him tightly. "I love you, Jack. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Get a better life," he muttered, but helped her sit up and leaned into her embrace. They'd be pissed that their ploy with Tom hadn't worked, try something more drastic. Jack was torn between needing to act as soon as possible and wanting to stay as long as possible. He hated indecision. It made him weak, vulnerable.

"Jack, how many potatoes should I wash?"

"The whole bag," he called back. "I have to feed half of Gotham today."

"Right, and how much money do you put toward food in this house?" Rachel wanted to know.

Jack stopped complaining. "You just sit here while we cook. Can Douche --- I'm sorry, can Bruce cook? I know Charles can. Dick, can you cook? You all might as well earn your keep. Go help Susie. Susie, show Wonder Boy here where the recipes are."

"_Boy Wonder_," Dick muttered as he got up. He was staring past Jack as the man stood, his cheeks flushing again.

Jack turned his head and tilted it at Janet, who stood in the doorway in her knee-length nightgown, her arms crossed over her chest. He looked back at Dick, then rolled his eyes and coughed when Janet didn't move out of his way. She jumped and stepped to the side, blushing.

"You help cook, too," he ordered her. "Or help Rachel. Whatever she needs you to do."

He laughed quietly as Dick fell over himself to help Janet, wanting to know what she and Rachel wanted for breakfast, if they were warm enough, and generally making a fool of himself. Up the stairs Jack tip-toed, to be met at the top by his Mitzi-girl-thing, who was pushing at the child fence or whatever it was that was keeping her from tumbling down the stairs.

"Ja-Ja!" she squealed, holding her arms up. "Goo' mo'ning!"

"Good morning, baby-doll," he told her, stepping over the fence and then picking her up. "Is Mama still asleep?"

"Sleep," the toddler confirmed, kissing his nose. He scrunched it at her and then kicked at his door.

"Get up," he ordered. "Get useful. Dick's fawning over Janet, so I need you two to cook breakfast."

"Cook your own breakfast," Bruce muttered.

"I'm only nice to you because your parents are dead," Jack told him. "It's just pity. Now get out and get busy."

"Fuck you."

"Hey, no swearing while my Mitzi-thing's around."

"We're up," Charles snapped. "Go away."

Jack grinned at Mitzi as he turned to Ava's room. "That's how you tell 'em," he said.

"Tell 'em!"

"That's right." He peeked in and Helna was still asleep, tossing a little. "Can you stay with Mama until breakfast is done?"

The girl-child didn't understand everything he'd said and she got a very thoughtful look on her face before shaking her head slowly. "No . . ."

"No, huh? Okay, then." Jack stepped over the fence and went back down the stairs to the kitchen. "Janet, put some clothes on." She and Dick looked up guiltily and then she slid past Jack to her room. "Susie, _keep_ your clothes on. No, Mitzi, you keep yours on, too. Christ, I live with a bunch of nudists . . ."

"Hello, pot?" Rachel called. "This is the kettle!"

"You don't wander around naked unless I tell you to; be quiet and rest," he ordered. She guffawed.

"Daddy, are we still going out tomorrow?" Susie asked. She was very carefully mixing batter, the tip of her tongue sticking out of the corner of her mouth.

"Tomorrow?"

"For Halloween! Please?"

Jack sighed and bounced Mitzi on his hip as he gave her his knuckle to suck on. She started chewing, and he winced a little at her sharp teeth. He'd forgotten about Halloween. Crap. "Uh, yeah, pumpkin, we are."

Her eyes got wide. "We need pumpkins! We don't have any pumpkins, Daddy!"

"Charles bought some yesterday," Janet said as she came out in a grey peasant blouse and a loose jean skirt. Wonder Boy was staring at her again and Jack glared. He looked away as soon as Janet looked his way.

Susie relaxed. "Charles thinks of everything!"

"That's what she's good for," Jack mused as the genius in question tromped down the stairs with Bruce on her heels. "You didn't make a mess in my room, did you?"

"_We_ have _respect_ for other people's property and common decency," the other man growled.

Jack rolled his eyes. "You wouldn't have known a _thing_ if I hadn't told you, so shut up."

"He's got a point," Charles said, "and both of you shut up. I'm not in the mood to deal with your issues today."

"I'm going to be a kitty for Halloween," Susie told Dick earnestly as he sat to cut up the potatoes she'd washed. "Daddy said he'll dye my hair so I can look like Rory."

Said demon slithered into the room and mrowled at the door, his pale blue eyes wide as he looked around. Jack leaned down and picked him up, slinging him over his shoulder as the cat purred.

"You're nicer than Rory is," he told Susie. Rory pulled himself onto Jack's shoulders, curling around them and digging his claws in to keep his balance. The pain didn't even register.

Mitzi touching his chest did, however. "Owwy?" she asked him. "Ja-Ja, owwy better?"

Crap, his cuts. She'd been worried about them the previous night, too, during their bath. Jack nodded quickly. "I'm fine, baby. I'm fine. Be nice, okay? Pet Rory gently."

"Nice," she repeated as she very carefully pet the cat. "Gentle."

"That's right, minion. Gentle. Good girl."

"Aren't you helping?" Bruce asked as Jack walked to the living room.

"Of course I am; I'm keeping Mitzi occupied and making sure Rachel's all right." He sat next to her and Rory walked onto the back of the couch, curling up there and watching him. "You all right, beautiful?"

"I'm fine," she assured him, resting her head on his shoulder. "I'm starving."

"Breakfast'll be done soon. When do the cops want to talk with me?"

Rachel blinked up at him, her blue eyes shadowed. "Today or tomorrow. I told them you need some time."

Jack closed his eyes. "Have them get a hold of Gordon. I gave him everything I know about . . . well, you know."

Rachel sighed. "Jack, you told _Jim_, but wouldn't tell the FBI?"

"I don't trust the Feds," he shrugged. "I trust Commissioner Awesome. He's good people."

"I'll let them know that." Rachel watched Mitzi play with Jack's hair for a bit before he opened his eyes and ran his fingers down her stomach.

"Good morning, baby," he murmured. Ava kicked back against his hand and Rachel sighed as she flipped over slowly. "Ew, that's gross, kid. Don't do that."

"So . . ."

Jack looked up at her. "Button?"

Rachel smiled. "I'd like to call the Quinzels today. I've never been properly introduced."

True; the one time Rachel had met Harleen's parents had been at the woman's funeral. Jack shrugged. "Okay. Their number's in my phone."

Now was as good a time as ever; he wouldn't get as upset if he was worried about her health. Rachel yawned a little harder than she needed to and nestled against Jack, watching as he diverted almost all of his attention to making sure she was all right. When he was properly fixated on her, she looked up at him with a gentle smile.

"If you could find your mother," she murmured, "would you want to? Just to know she was alive?"

Jack went still and his face stiffened as he stared down at his wife. His mother. Again. Rachel would obsess over this forever, if he let her. "No," he forced out. "She abandoned me. That says it all right there."

Stunning blue eyes implored him and he shuddered a bit. "What if you could find out what really happened? You were so young, Jack."

"I don't _want_ to know what 'really' happened. She left, Rachel. She left me with _him, knowing_ how abusive he was. What's there to find out?"

"What if it was to save you? What if he threatened to kill you if she didn't leave?"

"Then I'd rather have died," Jack snapped. Rachel winced and he lowered his forehead to hers. "I'm sorry," he whispered. He Idid/I want to know why the woman had left him, not even saying goodbye. Just . . . gone, one morning, taking the last bit of happiness from his life. "I don't want to know that she found a better life and left me there to rot," he murmured. "I don't want to know that I've probably got brothers or sisters somewhere, who lived a better life than I did, when she could have come back and got me. I _don't want to know_, Rachel. Please."

Rachel sighed. "Phillip called when you were in the bath last night. He talked with some of his colleagues, and they want me to go Metropolis to give birth."

Jack drew back and looked at her suspiciously. "Why Metropolis? It's an hour away. Why won't the hospital here do?"

"Not if they fly me there," Rachel said. "One of Phillip's friends is the main obstetrician at Metropolis General; he's got a lot more experience with older mothers giving birth than Phillip does. He wants me and Ava to have the best care we can get, Jack."

She got a sigh. "Is there anything _else_ about this pregnancy that you're not telling me?"

"I'm not keeping anything from you, Jack." He rolled his eyes at her. "Look, Met Gen's a lot more sophisticated than Loleta. Better care."

"If you try to guilt trip me by asking if I want the best care for you and Ava or not . . ." Jack left the threat hanging, really having nothing to threaten Rachel Iwith/I, and she kissed his neck.

"I love you, Jack."

"Yeah, yeah, me too. Fine, so we go visit Supes in Metropolis. You win. Anything else you want?"

"You, for the rest of my life."

Jack looked down at his wife, but her eyes were closed. ". . . You got it, babe."

"I better." Janet came out to give them their breakfast, effectively ending the conversation for the time being.

***

Rachel had just sent off an e-mail to Bob when her phone rang. She picked it up and cradled it against her ear. "Hello?"

"Rachel?"

She frowned. "Lee? What's wrong?" Her secretary sounded breathless, nervous.

"Nothing. I'm sorry to bother you at home, Rachel, but Mark's out of the office and he needs the briefs on the Tilley case, and I can't find them. I poked around your office, but they're not there. I know you're supposed to be on maternity leave, but could you come down here, please? I'm at my wits' end and he really needs them."

"They're in the file cabinet, Lee. You can't miss them."

"Maybe he moved them; they're not there. Oh, and I have some papers Mark needs the girls to sign. About the adoption."

The woman sounded stressed, and Rachel sighed. "All right, we'll be there soon."

"Thank you," Lee murmured before hanging up.

Rachel grumbled to herself as she struggled to stand up. Jack was putting the finishing touches on Susie's costume and looked up at her. "Jack, I need take the girls to the office real quick. Mark needs some case files and Lee can't find them, and there's some papers he needs them to sign. We won't be long."

He stood up. "Let me get my keys."

"No, you stay here. Janet can drive me. Come on, Susie."

"Rachel ---"

"I'm just going to pop in, get her the files, and come home. There's no need to fuss; Charles and Bruce are in town. Let them know I'm coming. Janet!"

The girl poked her head out of her room, where she'd been showing Dick something online. "Yeah?"

"I need you to drive me to town." Rachel smiled down at Susie, then kissed Jack to shut him up when he took her arm. "Why don't you work on that surprise for Susie? Get it all set up in the living room." she whispered. Jack had gone and bought the girl a new kitten the previous day, hiding it in he and Rachel's room.

He was frowning. "I want to go with you."

"Jack, come on," Rachel cajoled. "Get it all set up; Dick can help."

He rolled his eyes. "I'm calling Bruce to let him know you're coming."

"You do that." She smiled and let him pinch her rear before turning to Janet and Susie. "Come on, you two."

"What are we signing?" Janet wanted to know.

'Adoption,' Rachel mouthed at her as Jack walked them to the car. Dick hurried to open the door for Janet. She smiled up at him and he flushed. Rachel laughed as Jack rolled his eyes. "You acted the same way when we first met," she reminded him.

"And I was a pathetic loser, too," he muttered. He kissed her firmly, tongue slipping against hers as she sighed. "Be quick," he begged.

"You just get the kitten set up," Rachel told him with a smile as she kissed along his scars. "Maybe I'll be really tired tomorrow night and need everyone but you to go away for a few hours."

"Are you sure?" Jack whispered. He wanted time to themselves, but was afraid of hurting her. "You need to rest."

"And amazingly," Rachel laughed, "you can be very gentle when you want to be. We won't be gone long. I love you."

"I love you, too." He closed the passenger door and stepped back as they drove off, then glanced at the boy next to him. "All right, Wonder Penis, let's get to work." Dick's angry protests followed him to the house.

***

"Lee?" Rachel called as she opened the office door. The woman looked up, pale and shaking. "God, what's wrong? Are you all right?"

"I'm not feeling well," the woman whispered. "Just . . . Get the briefs, okay? Mark needs them. Girls, come here and sign these. Be quick, Rachel. Hurry."

Rachel sighed and unlocked her office door, going to the file cabinet and pulling the files out, wondering how Lee could have missed them. "I've got them," she called as her computer beeped with an incoming e-mail. She didn't recall leaving it on. It was set to turn on half an hour before she got to work, though, so maybe she'd just forgotten to turn the auto-on off. She leaned over with a wince to check it, but it wasn't an address she was familiar with. The only thing stopping her from deleting it as spam was the title: Jack's Affair.

Rachel's finger hovered over the delete key, her heart suddenly pounding. It was just a stupid spam e-mail. She should delete it. Jack was waiting at home. Rachel opened the e-mail.

It was a video file. She looked up and out the window, thinking hard. This had nothing to do with _her_ Jack. Just some random e-mail. It would probably put a virus on her computer. She downloaded it.

The first clip was dated less than a month ago, the night Jack had first said he'd been invited to Tom's. What was showing on the screen, though, was the inside of a bar and Jack dancing with Veronica the way Rachel had thought he only danced with _her_, all grinding hips and grasping hands. She sat down heavily. "Oh, God . . ."

The date changed, but the bar was the same, Jack dirty dancing with Veronica, then standing far too close to her, his hands on her thighs, talking in her ear as she grabbed his shirt and wrapped her legs around his. Then he kissed her and it was a stab to Rachel's heart; she couldn't help the tears that welled up in her eyes as Veronica led her husband to some stairs at the back of the bar. The scene changed, and what Rachel saw made her sob out loud. She wanted to look away, to not see that woman and Jack in bed together, Jack touching Veronica like he'd sworn to only touch Rachel, letting Veronica put her mouth on him and loving it, by the look on his face. She sat at her desk and cried as she watched the affair unfold, wondering who the hell had taped this and sent it to her, who had sat outside Veronica's house and taped them having sex against the door, in the shower.

The last segment made her almost physically ill and forget about whoever had done this. Sunday night. _Sunay. Night_. Jack and Veronica, in bed _again_, Jack with . . . Jack with a knife. He was cutting himself as that woman rode him, his head thrown back in ecstasy. Rachel cried out and shoved herself away from the computer as Janet and Susie walked in, and her blood went cold as she realised why Lee had wanted her to hurry, as she realised that by opening that damned e-mail, she'd been manoeuvred into making the biggest mistake of her life. The door shut.

***

"What do you _mean_, she's not at the office?" Jack asked irritably. "Maybe she's not there yet. You know how Janet drives."

"I'm saying _no one's_ here," Bruce snapped. "It's all locked up."

"Well, fuck, did you call her?"

"She's not answering her phone."

Jack stared down at the spotted tabby kitten that was sleeping at his feet. His phone beeped with an incoming video call. It was a Gotham area code. He stared at it. "Call you back, B," he whispered before switching over. "You fucking _cunt_."

"Ah-ah-ah," Anita admonished with a shake of her finger. "That's no way to talk to the person who's in charge of your wife's safety, isn't it?" She leaned to the side, resting her head on Rachel's shoulder. Rachel had duct tape over her mouth and tears streaming from her eyes. "Knock it off," Anita snapped as a child whimpered. She sighed. "Unfortunately for him, Maury doesn't quite get the first rule of a hostage situation. But you do, don't you, Jack? You understand it quite well." She swung her phone around to take in Janet and Susie, both bound like Rachel. It looked like they were in a van. "You don't harm the hostages until you absolutely have to. If you're good, Jack, and give us what we want, they go free. We're taking them with us for the time being, though, just to make sure you don't go off half-cocked."

"Let them go," Jack whispered. "You don't want this, Anita."

"Oh, but I do," she purred, focusing on Rachel's face. "Oh, you should have _seen_ the way Rachel was sobbing when she saw the nasty things you were doing with Veronica. Poor Rachel, can't keep her husband happy, so he goes off with the town whore . . . Ew, I hope you wore a _condom_, at least. Oh, but you didn't, did you? I'd get him tested if I were you, Rachel."

"_Let them go_!" Jack bellowed. His head exploded with pain and he fell to his knees, gasping.

"It's your own damned fault," Anita snapped as Maury giggled. "If you'd given in when we first asked, this wouldn't be happening. Now get to Gotham before the mob decides they can stand a little _collateral damage_, if you know what I mean." She hung up and Rachel's muffled sobs rang in his ears as he screamed into the floor, slamming his fists down until they bled. Jack grabbed on to the counter and puked into the sink as he saw Dick running to the house from the dock.

The boy was too late. Jack straightened, close his eyes . . . and disappeared.


	27. Chapter 27

"Now, look," Anita said as she pocketed her phone. "This is what's going to happen. Hey, hey, pay attention, Rachel. We're taking a little trip to Gotham City. You're going to stay in some very nice digs, I'm told, until the Joker shows up. If he _doesn't_ show up after a reasonable amount of time --- I'd say twenty-four hours from now --- and there's no sign that he _will_ show up, we start with the least important of you," and she waved her hand toward Janet and Susie, "and start sending him some _encouragement_. If he's good and shows up, and agrees to our terms, then you'll all be fine." She glanced at Rachel as the woman shook her head frantically, then peeled the duct tape off. "What?"

"Let us go," Rachel sobbed. "Please, you don't want the Joker to come back. He'll kill you all. He doesn't _care_ who dies, and he'll be _pissed_ that you're trying to manipulate him."

Anita rolled her eyes. "Look, Rachel, I don't care, all right? Things are out of control in Gotham. The Justice League needs to be taken down, and right now, the Joker's the only one who stands a chance."

"You don't understand! Oh, God, please!"

The short woman taped Rachel's mouth shut again and then leaned over to hit Maury in the arm. "Leave them _alone_, Maury. If you hurt them and the Joker shows up, all bets are off. What?" she asked the girls. "Oh, you're wondering where your old lady is? I figure, this time of year, with the average rate of decomposition . . . Naw, they won't find her at the bottom of Folsom Lake for a while yet. Get over it, kids, shit happens in life. If Jack had given in when we wanted him to, Mommy wouldn't be rotting right now. This is the most difficult job I've ever done, I swear . . ."

"I'm still not sure he can bring the Joker back," Maury whined as he fluffed his curls.

"He's been losing it for months; he'll bring him back to save his precious little family. Trust me, I've followed Jack _very_ carefully."

"Hey, you're the shrink."

"Yes, I am," the woman murmured as she settled back into her seat. She turned to watch Rachel with narrowed eyes. "Don't you dare go into labour on me, Rachel. Don't. You. _Dare_." She got a vicious glare. "I don't need to be taking care of a squalling brat, and if anything happens to it, my bosses and the Joker won't be happy. So keep it inside, all right?"

Three and a half hours later they pulled up behind a high-rise office building, and the van doors opened to a group of men who pulled the hostages out. Anita snapped at them to be careful as they were shuffled inside and into a service elevator. Rachel was covered with sweat and Susie had wet herself out of sheer terror.

"Shit . . . Too much work . . ." Anita crossed her arms over her chest as the elevator opened to a sharp-dressed man who towered over her. "Dawes probably needs a doctor, Gallucci. I told you we should have taken her earlier. She goes into labour, it's on you."

"Were you _careful_ with her, Bentley?" the Italian asked crossly. "_Dio mio_, you three look terrible! Come, come, get them inside." He took Rachel's arm and led her down a short hallway, almost picking her up. "Ricci, get the doctor. Signora Dawes needs him at once. My apologies for your handling, Signora Dawes," he said with a smile as he led the group into a suite of rooms. "I had given orders to treat you with the utmost respect. You're our honoured guest, after all. Here, this will hurt only a bit." He pulled the duct tape off of her mouth after sitting her on the couch, and sighed when Rachel spit on him.

"You're a dead man," she snarled.

"Yes, yes, but I am even more a dead man if your Joker doesn't take care of that pesky Justice League. I understand your anger and fear, Signora Dawes, but please trust me that if the Joker cooperates, no more harm will come to you and your wards."

"Why aren't you _getting it_?" Rachel wailed. Janet and Susie were placed on either side of her and leaned in close, crying. "You think you can use the Joker like this and _get away with it_? He doesn't _work_ like that! How old are you? Do you _remember_ the last time he was on the loose?!"

Gallucci narrowed his eyes at her. "_Si_, Signora, I remember. I also remember that we almost had free reign of this city once again. I believe that with you here, he will keep the damage to a minimum. All I require is that he rid us of the Justice League. These are desperate times, Signora."

"It's not going to happen," Rachel argued. "Villains attract heroes ---"

"And likewise, Signora, heroes attract villains. Untie them," Gallucci ordered as one of his men handed him a wet wipe to get rid of Rachel's spit. "You ladies have free reign of this small apartment," it was almost as big as her house, "and the doctor will be here shortly. Rest, clean up. We want you well to show the Joker that we have kept our end of the bargain. The doors are locked, the windows double-paned, and there is nothing to use as weapons, so I implore you not to try to escape. You will be well taken care of, Signora."

Janet threw herself at the man but Rachel caught her, holding her and Susie tightly as Gallucci walked out. One of the men glanced back at them, and Rachel's eyes widened.

"You son of a _bitch_!" she shrieked. "You lying son of a _bitch_!" The door closed on her curses and then she collapsed into sobs, terrified and shaking and not knowing what to do.

"Rachel, what do we do?" Janet asked as she brought her knees up to her chest and sobbed. "I'm sorry, Rachel. I'm sorry."

"Rachel . . . Daddy and Batman will save us, right?"

The older woman wanted to break down and scream and cry, betrayal on two fronts ripping at her heart, but the two girls needed her. She hadn't seen who she thought she'd seen. She hadn't been that stupid the past five years. She couldn't have been.

"Rachel . . ."

"I'm okay," she whispered, wiping her face off and looking around. There were three doors, opening to two bedrooms and a bathroom, it looked like, and she forced herself off of the couch as her entire body protested. "Susie, you need a bath. We all do."

"I'm sorry," the small girl whimpered. "I couldn't help it."

"It's not your fault." Rachel led them to the bathroom and sat on the toilet with her head between her knees as best she could. "Janet, get in with Susie."

"What if they come back?" the girl wanted to know.

"Then . . . Then they come back. We can't stop them. They want us alive; they're not going to hurt us unless Jack doesn't show up."

"Unless the Joker doesn't show up," Janet corrected as she turned the tub on and got Susie undressed. "What if he doesn't show up?"

Rachel stared at the floor as her tears spotted it. "I don't know," she whispered.

***

"Where is he?!" Bruce bellowed.

"I don't know!" Dick yelled back. "I heard him shrieking and he was gone by the time I got back to the house!"

"Shut up, both of you!" Charles held her phone tightly to her ear. "Yes . . . yes. That's right. Gone, all of them. Probably to Gotham. _Find them_, damn it!" She hung up and hauled her last bag into the waiting car. "Helna, you and Mitzi are coming with us. You'll stay at Wayne Manor."

"I thought Gotham's not safe?" Helna asked as she held her daughter close to her.

"Trust me, Wayne Manor's the safest place you could be right now. Where's Superman?"

"He has issues of his own in Metropolis," Bruce snarled. "Livewire's out again."

"What are you _talking_ about?!" Helna wailed as Bruce pushed her into the car.

He took her hand and shook it. "Hi, I'm Batman. Nice to meet you. This is Batgirl, this is Robin, and we're here to bring Jack back, since he's gotten it into his head that the only way to keep his family safe is by becoming the Joker again. Oh, and Superman was going to help, but he's indisposed at the moment."

"Oh, God, Tom's in Metropolis!"

"And doing just fine, I made sure of it," Bruce growled. The car took off to the airport. "Charles, did you call the police?"

"Oh, they got their anonymous tip." She grabbed her phone as it went off. "Gordon. Yeah, he's gone. No, no trace of him. Yeah. Your contacts know where Gallucci's main place is yet? They're probably there. Yeah, I _bet_ Hideki's mad. Make sure he's safe --- oh, he's gone, is he? Perfect. I'll let him know." She slammed her fist against the door as she hung up. "Hideki's up and disappeared, and Gordon doesn't know where Gallucci's hideout is."

"The most gaudy building in Gotham would be my guess."

"He's not hiding in Wayne Manor." Bruce glared at Charles before his lips twisted.

Helna was shaking her head. "_You're_ all _super_heroes?" she whimpered. "Rachel's friends with half the Justice League?"

Bruce looked at her calmly. "She only knows me and Charles. She just met Dick. So . . . yes, we are, and no, she doesn't. You'll be safe at Wayne Manor, Helna. I don't think they'll come after you, but I'm not leaving that to chance. We've let the Loleta police know where you'll be." He looked out the window as they sped toward the airport and let Charles explain the situation.

***

There was a polite tap at the door. "Signora? I have brought the doctor. Are you ladies decent?"

Susie was hiding under the bed while Janet tried to coax her out. Rachel sighed and closed her eyes again as the door opened and footsteps got closer.

"How far along is she? Do you have her medical records?"

"She is due early January, and no, we don't."

The new man sighed as he knelt next to Rachel. "She shouldn't have been moved. Mrs. Dawes? How far along are you? Please, I need to know to make sure your baby's healthy."

"Thirty weeks today," she whispered, not opening her eyes. "I'm supposed to be on bed rest."

"Get that equipment in here," the doctor ordered. "You, help set it up."

"Sir."

Rachel winced at the low baritone and cracked her eyes open to glare up at Raoul, who paid her no attention as he quickly set up the ultrasound equipment while the balding doctor muttered about being completely in the dark about his patient.

"Jack's going to kill you," she whispered when he knelt next to her. The traitor may have hesitated briefly, but the doctor was poking at her and Rachel turned her head to watch him.

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Dawes, I'm Doctor Sanchez." He was frowning down at her and smoothed her hair out of her face. She flinched away from him. "I'm just here to make sure you and your child are healthy. They've threatened my family. I'm sorry." He went about his check-up, sighing with relief when someone managed to hack into Doctor Howard's system and pull her medical files. "She needs to be under constant supervision," Sanchez finally declared. "She shouldn't have been moved. I'm worried about premature labour."

He flinched as a gun cocked behind him. "Then you'd best supervise her, hadn't you?" Gallucci asked. "You will stay here and make sure she doesn't give birth until it is her time."

"I don't have the supplies I need," the doctor protested. "She needs to be in a hospital."

"Then make this a hospital. Tell Gillespie what drugs you need, what equipment, and he will get it for you. He has . . . connections. Hart, tell Bentley I want her in my office in half an hour . . ."

His voice trailed off as he left, and Rachel looked at Raoul as Sanchez wrote down what he needed. The young man was staring at the doctor and not meeting her gaze. No wonder Anita and Maury had found them, with Raoul feeding the mob information. What was _with_ her and trusting mob plants? First Ramirez, now Raoul . . .

"Does Hideki know?" she asked him. He kept ignoring her as he took the paper Sanchez handed him and left. Bastard.

"I'm going to give you an injection that will help you to sleep," Sanchez told her. "You need to stay as calm as possible. Mrs. Dawes? For Ava's sake."

"It's not going to matter," Rachel murmured as she felt the needle pierce her flesh. She sighed as her body relaxed. "The Joker's going to kill you all . . ."

***

Three days later, Susie had finally crawled out from under the bed. She spent most of her time curled up against Rachel, who spent _her_ time in a drugged haze. Sanchez was keeping her as sedated as was safe. Despite his pleadings that the sisters stay in the other room, they refused to leave Rachel, terrified of being alone. The worst was the absolute _normalcy_ of the situation. The only indication they had that the Joker had arrived in Gotham were the sudden explosions the city sent up, the smug looks on the faces of Gallucci and his men when the crime lord came to visit.

The door was flung open, and Rachel didn't bother moving. She didn't want assurances that things were going fine, that Jack was _cooperating_. Sanchez yelled and the bedroom door shook like someone had been thrown against it. Rachel opened her eyes.

"Who are you?"

She recognised that low growl and tried to pull herself out of the drugs as Sanchez whimpered. "Please, I'm the doctor! Gallucci told me to stay here to keep an eye on her! Please, I'm trying to help!"

"Where is she?!"

"This room . . . please . . ."

Susie whimpered and Janet pulled her close as she sat up, staring at the door with wide eyes. It was flung open and the silhouette that blocked the doorway was at once comfortingly and terrifyingly familiar.

The Joker glared into the room and stepped over Sanchez' limp body, a gun in his right hand as he strode to Rachel's side of the bed and stared down at her. She looked up into his cold brown eyes and saw nothing of her husband.

"D, Daddy?" Susie whimpered.

"Susie, shh," Janet murmured, whining a little when the Joker turned his attention to her.

Then his gaze was back on Rachel and he dropped his hand to her face. "You are _so_ much trouble, woman," he murmured. "Do you _know_ what I had to do in order to get back? Let me tell you a story." He sat on the bed and ran his hand over Rachel's stomach quizzically, like he didn't know why it was bulging out so much. Rachel whimpered a little. "I'm not gonna hurt you, beautiful. Just listen. Once upon a time, I was in Arkham. I was _miserable_, let me tell you. They drugged me, they beat me, they tried to _an_-a-lyse me . . . it was awful. I was so _bored_. I wanted to get out and _play_ some more . . . And oh, I've been having a _great_ time since I got back." He grinned at her, a red slash against the white of his face paint. Rachel didn't know where they'd gotten a suit like his old one. It terrified her. "Then, one day, in walks this pretty little Jewess shrink, determined to _fix_ me and be _famous_. Harley was _so eager_ to make her name in the world . . . She really was a two-bit shrink, though. But she was my ticket out, see?"

He glanced at the door as Sanchez pulled himself to his feet. "Please . . . Don't hurt her . . ."

"I'm not _going_ to hurt her, you idiot," the Joker growled. "I can barely hurt the _bad guys_ at this point. Where was I? Oh, Harley's sweet little pussy." He adjusted his overcoat and cleared his throat. "Right. So, I decided it was time to try _normal_, for once. That stupid super-sanity theory of hers? Complete bullshit. I'm not crazy, Rachel. Psychopathic, yeah, sure, I'll admit to _that_, but I am _not_ delusional." He was murmuring now, his green hair swaying as he rocked just a bit. "What I did was a little . . . sleight of hand. Janet, do you remember what Jack told you about me? Before your little . . . incident . . . in the limo?"

She flinched. "He said that you're not a split personality."

"That's right! Good girl; glad the hormones didn't wipe your memory. See, bunny, _I'm_ not the split personality." The Joker leaned down close, his lips barely touching Rachel's ear as he whispered his next words. "Jack is."

The woman shook her head in denial, tears squeezing out of her eyes. "No . . ."

"_No_?" the Joker mimicked, fluttering his eyelids in mock concern. "No! But _yes_, dearest, oh, _yes_. It's easy to do, really. I just had to drag up some old memories, give them a little bit of shape, then close my eyes and . . . sleep . . ." He beamed at her and pat her cheek to get her attention. "Look at me. That's why Jack couldn't remember his past. _I_ chose what he remembered, what he didn't, what would be the best combination of violence and vulnerability to get out of Arkham and into Harley's bed." He screwed his face up into a grimace. "Went to sleep a bit too long, though. Before I knew it, he was hitched and settling down, becoming his _own_ personality. I had to get rid of that bitch before she ruined all my plans . . . So, with some careful rearrangement of the balcony furniture, some careful application of wine, some especially wild sex to get Jack to loosen up . . . well, it's amazing what a well-placed bite will get you." He laughed to himself, then went serious so quickly that Rachel jumped. "Then _you_ had to show up, didn't you?"

"Give me Jack," Rachel whispered.

"No," the Joker said petulantly, crossing his arms over his chest. "I was _all set_ to make my big come-back, but Jack had _other_ plans. He _liked_ living his boring little life, he liked _you_ . . . So he latched on to you and wouldn't let _go_, no matter _how hard_ I tried! How inconsiderate, right? So rude to his maker." The Joker sniffed and then stretched out next to Rachel, running one gloved hand up and down her arm as he grinned at her. "He dug _so deep_ into you," he murmured, "that I couldn't get out. And he did dig deep, didn't he? Deep enough that now you're all knocked up, and he won't let me hurt you, or hurt other people unless they're the _bad guys_," he whined the words nasally, "and I'm a little stuck. I need him gone, Rachel. You got him back from me once; it's not going to happen again." The man lowered his lips to Rachel's and left them there, just the barest pressure. "He loves you _so much_ . . ."

"Then why not let him stay?" Rachel whispered. "Leave him alone. He doesn't need to cut himself ---"

"Oh, yeah, Veronica." The Joker snorted, his eyes crossing as he stared at Rachel. "Guess they taped it, huh? What an idiot. He thought that if he was violent with Veronica, he wouldn't be violent with you. Didn't want to hurt you . . . How much _did_ it hurt, watching those videos? Just wondering."

"You want a place to belong," Rachel murmured urgently. She was blinking tears out of her eyes. "It's better to be hated than ignored, isn't it? You have a place here, with us. Please, let Jack come back. You don't need to work with the mob ---"

"Who says I'm working with the mob? Oh, sure, right now our goals run parallel, but I'm _not_ their bitch." He raised his head and looked over at Janet and Susie. "Stop your snivelling," he growled. Then he was back to Rachel, touching her cheek. "Don't you _care_ that Jack's a figment of my imagination, Rachel?"

"He's not," she protested. The Joker snorted. "He's who you used to be; who you _wanted_ to be."

"Shut up," she was warned.

Rachel leaned her forehead against his collar bone and placed her hand on his arm. "You wanted a normal life once, didn't you? Someone to love, a place . . . For Jack to hold on to me as hard as he did, to fight as hard as he did to stay, it had to have been something _you_ wanted once ---"

"Shut up!" the Joker yelled. Rachel whimpered and flinched as he rolled off the bed and stood up, his grip on her arm tightening painfully as he snarled at her. "Don't _think_ you know about _me_, Rachel. Don't think for a _moment_ that you know _anything_ about me."

His hand had moved to her throat and Rachel bit back a sob. "Raoul's working for Gallucci," she whispered.

The man in her husband's body froze. "What?"

"Raoul's working for Gallucci. He's here."

"That's . . . _interesting_." The Joker pulled Rachel up and took one glove off, placing his bare hand on Rachel's stomach and pressing in. "How's Ava?"

"I should be in the hospital," she told him, hoping that the news would give Jack enough of a purchase.

The Joker squinted and shook his head sharply, like she'd seen Jack do more frequently over the past few months, and snarled. "Shut up!" he hissed. "Just shut up or I'll kill all of them!" After a moment he opened his eyes wide and placed his palm against his forehead, then shook himself. "Nice try, toots," he told her with a grin. "I've gotta go. Jack gets a little restless when he doesn't know that you're all right _and she's just fine, you fucking idiot_!" He squeezed his eyes shut and then opened them wide again, growling. "They're all fine! This stupid doctor's gonna take care of them, so why don't you just fucking _go away_ once and for _all_?" He turned and stalked out of the room, aiming a kick at Sanchez before slamming the door shut.

Rachel didn't see him again for another three days.


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N:** This chapter contains rape; it's not described, but it's there. It's the last of the uber-angsty chapters.

***

"I'm _really_ starting to get pissed!" the Joker screamed. "You're not as much fun as you used to be, Batsy!" He dodged a batarang (_batarang_! who came _up_ with these stupid names?! Bats and his _damned_ obsession with _bats_!) and shot that stupid Robin boy in the kneecap, groaning as Jack flailed around in his mind. "Get a _life_, already! What do you freaks _want_ with me?!" He hit his detonator and ducked, but wasn't quite quick enough and went sprawling as Batman flew (like a bat!) into the air, landing heavily a few feet away from the Joker.

"You know why we're here, Joker," the man snarled.

"Come the fuck _on_, Bats," the Joker panted. "I am _not_ going back with you. Don't give me that crap about Rachel and Ava _needing me_," he whined, "because _I don't care_. And pretty soon, _Jack_ won't be around to care, either! Anyone ever tell you ya suffer from a severe case of OCD?" He grunted as Batgirl stomped on his stomach, then curled on his side and coughed. "_Fuck_. What'd I ever do to _you_?"

"Shut up, Jack."

"Not me!" he sang as she tried to wrestle his arms behind his back. "Not me! No one here by that name!" He reared back and felt her nose crunch, giggling.

"Where're Rachel and the girls?" Bats demanded.

"Aw, shit, was that _all_ you wanted to know? You don't love me any more, do you?" The Joker stood up shakily and brought a knife down into his opponent's arm, laughing. "Gallucci's got 'em holed up in the Weston building, top floor. Oh, don't tell me you don't wanna _play_ any more!" he called out as Batgirl picked Robin up and started limping off with him. "I'm just getting _started_!"

He went sprawling as something heavy and solid hit the back of his head and brought stars to his vision, then managed to flop over onto his back, gasping for air as someone in tight leather (or something like it) straddled his hips.

"Bitch hit me with a brick!" he wailed.

"I'll claw your eyes out in a second if you don't shut up," the woman hissed at him.

"Rrrrowl," the Joker purred at her. "Cat on a hot tin roof! What's up, pussycat? Thought you were one of the _bad guys_. Jack lets me kill the _bad guys_." He was grinning manically at the woman-cat sitting on him, then picked her up by the waist and tossed her to the side. She crashed into Batman as he was coming over to help and they both tumbled backward. "Oh! Oh, I remember! You three have a little love triangle going on, don't you?" the Joker called down the incline the two had slid down. "You two and Batgirl! Wow, how's that working for ya?" He lay on his stomach and propped his chin on his palms, grinning at the two prone figures while he kicked his feet in the snow-filled air.

"Just fine," Batgirl snarled as she brought another brick down toward his head.

The Joker slithered out of the way and scrambled to his feet, his breath obvious in the winter night air. He howled with laughter. "Nice. Love to chat, but I gotta run; work to do!" He turned away and the grin on his face faded into a snarl. "Old friend to see," he growled as he dropped onto the fire escape.

Charles slid down to pull Catwoman off of Bruce, tossing her to the side before leaning over the man. "Are you all right?"

"Fine," he coughed. "Just bruised. Is she ---"

"Bitch is fine," Charles grumbled. "The Weston building's got some tight security. It'll take at least two weeks to ---"

"I can get us inside in a week," Catwoman interrupted as she pushed herself up. She hissed at Charles when the woman stood.

"Why are _you_ so keen on helping all of a sudden?"

She got a sneer. "Gallucci's got some art I've had my eye on for a while. I figure you might let me walk off with it if I help get your friends back."

Charles looked at Bruce as he stood, leaning on her heavily. "A week?"

"I've been casing it for a while," the woman told them. She smoothed her outfit, not that it needed it, and rested one hand on her hip. "I get you in, you get your friends, I get the art, I go free. What do you say?"

Bruce looked down at Charles and she nodded. "Fine," he said. "What do you need?"

***

"--- and I think I have a con_cussion_," the Joker was whining to Rachel. He was holding a bag of ice to the back of his head, making a face. "Help me _out_, here. Have some _pity_!"

"Give me my husband," she demanded. She was sitting up in the bed, propped up against pillows with a tray of soup across her lap.

"No can do, toots. Not until I know I can come back without a fight. He's got some _plan_ to stomp me out for good, but it's not gonna work." The Joker turned his head to glare at Sanchez. "Doc, she's not being very nice to me. I've been _injured_."

"Hurting people I care about!" Rachel cried softly. "That doesn't endear you to me!"

"But I could have died," he told her with a conspiratorial grin. "And if I die, Jack dies, too. So don't you want to help keep me healthy?" Then he sneezed, huge and undignified, and Rachel's hand was automatically on his forehead.

"You're fevered," she said with pursed lips. "You go out in the middle of a rainstorm, then go prancing around Gotham in the middle of the night, during a snowstorm. Are you a _complete_ idiot?"

The Joker crawled over her lap to stretch out beside her, still grinning. "Aw, you're worried about me! Good. I've got pneumonia and a concussion. I deserve to be pampered."

"I should think Gallucci can buy you all the women you wanted," Rachel sniffed. "Besides, _you'__re_ not the one who's in danger of going into premature labour any moment."

"I don't want them," the Joker told her seriously. His voice was lower, now, not normal but close. "_Jack_ doesn't want them. We want _you_, to pamper _us_."

"And _I_ want _you_," Rachel snapped, "to give my husband back and burn in Hell!"

The man pursed his lips and raised his eyebrows as he rolled his eyes, settling back on the bed. Susie had tried to crawl up with him the first time he'd laid down, but he'd easily shoved her over the side. Now she hid whenever he came around.

"Frigid bitch," he muttered without bite.

Rachel sighed. He wouldn't leave until she'd given him however much attention he wanted. Truth be told, she wanted him with her. If he was in the suite, he wasn't out killing and causing havoc, getting in the line of fire. So she rested her hand on his forehead gently and he smiled to himself.

"What do you want?" she asked softly. Maybe her presence would keep Jack alive.

"Me? Not much. Jack's got this idea that we need a bath, though. He thinks we're _dirty_." The Joker raised one arm to sniff under it, then wiggled his nose. "All right, so we've got the _au naturel_ scent going."

"If I take a bath with you, will you shut up about your head?"

He shrugged. "The one on my shoulders, yeah. Hey, Doc!" Sanchez leaned in with a tired look on his face. "I got a cold; a hot shower'd help, right?"

"Yes," the man muttered. "I'll have them bring more soup, too. And medicine."

"That's the spirit! Doc's got great bedside manners, huh?" the Joker asked Rachel, leaning up on his elbows and tilting his head back so her hand fell onto his face, laughing. "But I hope they're not _that_ good." He narrowed his eyes at Rachel, then grinned and shook his head. "Naw, you're not like that, are you? You're too devoted to Jack to let another man dick you. You're not _like_ Jack."

"Jack was trying to keep me safe while _you_ were trying to ruin our lives," Rachel told him as he helped her to stand. She had to lean against him to get to the bathroom. "It's your fault. I don't blame him."

"Love really does conquer all, doesn't it?" the Joker asked absently. "Oh, wait, didn't do Harvey much good, did it? He knew you wanted him to live and be strong and he flipped anyway."

"That doesn't hurt me anymore." Rachel rested her hands on his shoulders as he undressed her; Sanchez had started the shower already. "I'm over that."

"Yeah, well, a guy can try." The Joker stripped himself easily, then stepped into the shower and pulled her in after him. He looked down at her as the hot water melted his greasepaint off, and Rachel's eyes watered as Jack's face was slowly revealed. "Don't look at me like that," he muttered. His hands were on her hips, firm yet gentle, keeping her upright.

"Brandon . . ."

The Joker's eyes widened and he pushed away from her, slipping on the shower floor and landing heavily on his rear. Rachel leaned against the wall to avoid falling herself, staring down at him in shock. She hadn't expected that reaction.

Neither, apparently, had the Joker. He gaped like a fish out of water, spluttering as he scrambled into a crouch. "Where the _fuck_ did you hear _that_ name?!" he demanded.

"A little bird," Rachel murmured. The heat was making her dizzy. "She told me . . . everything . . ."

"Don't you pass out," the Joker ordered as he stood up, turning her around and kneeling slowly, shutting the shower off and turning the tap on before plugging the tub. "I don't know who told you what, but they lied."

"You were such a beautiful boy," Rachel whispered as she rested her head against his shoulder. "He told her he'd kill you if she didn't leave, Brandon. She never got married again, never had more children. She wanted to save you."

"Shut up," the Joker growled. "Shut the fuck _up_." He bit her shoulder firmly and spoke around her skin. "Shut up."

"Get us out of here," she begged him. She raised her hands to his hair and pulled gently. "Please, I need to be in the hospital. Doctor Sanchez is giving me steroids to help Ava grow and drugs to keep me from going into labour, but they're not going to work for much longer. I can't have her here, Jack. Please. Your daughter can't be born here."

"Shut _up_!" he shrieked at her, standing and almost falling out of the bath. He scrambled for his clothes and didn't bother putting them on as he pushed out into the main room of the suite, where Janet and Susie both yelled in protest. "Stop it! All of you!"

Rachel slipped lower into the water with a disappointed sigh. It had been a stretch, she knew, but she'd hoped _something_ positive would happen if she called him by his real name. She flinched when the door slammed shut and then Janet appeared in the doorway.

"Are you all right, Rachel?"

"I'm fine," she murmured. "I'm sorry."

The girl stood there looking awkward. "It's . . . it's not your fault." None of them had talked much past comforting Susie in the week they'd been held captive. Rachel didn't know what to say. Neither, apparently, did Janet.

"I should have let Jack come with us."

"They would have just gotten all of us at once," Janet reasoned.

"I'm sorry I got you girls into this."

Janet pursed her lips and sighed. ". . . I . . ."

She turned after a moment and went back to her sister.

***

"How is he?" Bruce asked as Alfred came out of Dick's room.

His friend shrugged. "He'll survive, Master Wayne. And your deal with Catwoman? How's that coming along?"

"We're almost ready. Hideki's back. Won't tell anyone where he was."

"I suppose he's got his reasons. Still, it'll do Gotham good to have a D.A. that sticks with them when they need him." The older man looked at his ward. "How are you holding up, Master Wayne?"

Bruce glanced at him. "I shouldn't have gone along with that stupid plan of Jack's. I shouldn't have let him persuade me that it was for the best."

"You'll take comfort, then, that the Joker hasn't actually killed anyone of consequence yet."

"Anyone of consequence? Alfred, the last building he blew up had fifty men in it!"

That brought a smile to the older man's lips. "And they were hardened criminals to the last man, Master Bruce. How many innocent people have died in the last two weeks?" He didn't get an answer and nodded. "Now, Her Majesty is in your sitting room, Master Wayne. Do mind the whips."

Bruce smiled at the raven-haired woman waiting for him as he walked into the room. "Diana. How are you?"

"I dented my plane earlier," she said with a smile of her own as she stood.

He kissed her hand. "Really? How can you tell?"

"I just can, Bruce." She hugged him, laughing when he started. "Come on, Bruce, I can tell when a man needs a hug. How's Dick?"

"Livid, but alive. The Joker got just above his knee. He'll walk again."

"Your friend sounds like he's trying to stay out of trouble."

Bruce sat and rubbed his eyes. "I hope it works, at least until we can get to him. Jack's an idiot, have I mentioned?"

"Many times," she answered with another smile. "When are we moving in?"

"Tomorrow night, if Catwoman keeps her end of the bargain." He rubbed his chin. "Thank you. For your help."

"That's what we're here for," she said airily. "We even help each other out at times. Superman's still hung up with Livewire, then?"

"Last time I checked. I hate that woman."

Diana reached out to brush some hair from his face. Her eyes were gentle. "I think you hate everyone who's getting in your way right now, Bruce."

"You could be right," he murmured. "Are you staying here tonight?"

"Only if you need me to. It might look a little suspicious if I stay over, then we all suddenly show up together. The Joker knows your identity."

"But he hasn't told anyone," Bruce sighed as he cracked his neck, "and that gives me some hope. He's really just . . ." The man flapped his hands as he tried to find the words.

"Making noise?" Alfred asked from the doorway. Bruce turned and nodded. "He's being very flashy, but he hasn't caused much actual damage. Oh, yes, he's murdered people, but they're men who've slipped out of the law's hands many times before. This isn't like fourteen years ago. I wouldn't go reminding the public of that, because the Joker might well decide to be contrary, but I believe Jack has more of a hold over him that he wants to admit."

The princess clapped the billionaire on the shoulder. "And there's your hope right there."

***

"Where is girl?"

"Don't, you can't be in here! Gallucci said ---" There was a thud as Rachel jerked awake. Susie was trembling beside her, and on the other side of the bed, Janet was sitting up.

"Shut up or we kill you, doctor. Where is girl? This room? That room?"

There was male laughter, loud and drunken as Sanchez pleaded with them. "If you hurt them, Gallucci will kill you!"

"Signor Gallucci only say to not hurt the Signora. He says nothing about sweet girl with her. Move, spic-man." A brief struggle as Janet got out of the bed, and then the door was thrown open. Several of Gallucci's men stood there with bottles of beer in their hands. The leader looked Janet up and down with a leer. "Ah, there is girl. You are lonely, yes? Need men to keep you company."

"Piss off," Janet snapped as the men laughed. "Get the hell out of here."

"Oh, she has spirit. Might need to be broken in a bit, yes?" He'd started walking toward her with an easy gait, sure of himself. Susie had started crying and hiding her head under the pillows, clinging to Rachel's side. "You come with us, or maybe we are not so nice to you little sister."

"Gallucci doesn't want any of us hurt," Rachel managed to force out. "Ask the Joker; he'll kill you if you hurt us."

She could barely focus on what one of the men held up. "Ah, but we do not plan on hurting pretty girl," the leader said. "We will make her happy, give her special medicine to take away all cares." The needle glinted in the light from the main room. "You come easy, girl, or you come bruised." Janet had been edging around the room, but she was trapped and she knew it. The man was getting impatient. "You come with us now! Or do we hurt the _bambina_?" Susie whimpered and Rachel held her tightly, unable to move as she glared at the men. Sanchez was in the background, a gun to his head and equally helpless. "Well?"

Janet was sobbing and shaking her head. "No . . . please don't . . ."

"Don't what? Don't hurt you sister? You come to me now, girl, and you sister is fine. You don't come to me now, I take off her toes."

Rachel had thought she'd felt despair four years ago in the park, watching Jack be overshadowed by the Joker. She'd thought she'd felt despair ten years before that, as she sat tied to the chair in that warehouse, surrounded by oil drums and knowing she was going to die. What she'd felt those times didn't come close to the aching chasm in her soul right now, watching Janet slowly shuffle toward the waiting group of thugs, toward the drugs they were going to fill her with.

"Don't take her," she tried one last time. She cursed the sedatives that wouldn't let her speak above a whisper. "I'll go with you."

The leader threw his head back with a howl of laughter as he grabbed Janet's arm and yanked her into the group. "Oh, Signora, I am no fool. You are weak, and Signor Gallucci, he says he kill us if we touch you. He says nothing about girl, so, we are here for girl. Lock him in room."

The men were taunting Sanchez as they threw him into the room and closed the door. The man banged on it for a while, drowning out the sounds of Janet crying in the next room, then groped his way to the bed in the dark. The mattress dented as he sat on it and leaned over Rachel, covering her ears as he begged for forgiveness, as Rachel covered Susie's ears and sobbed.

***

Rachel didn't know what time it was when Susie's sudden shrieks woke her up, but she started in the dark room and then shook the little girl, murmuring reassurances when the shrieks turned to sobs.

"Susie, it was a dream. It was a dream, Susie, I'm right here, it's okay . . . Shh, sweety, shh . . . just a dream . . ."

The light turned on and Rachel winced, but it helped calm the girl down. Sanchez came into view. "They left, maybe an hour ago. The door is blocked. I'm so sorry, Mrs. Dawes, I couldn't . . . I didn't . . ."

"Shut up," Rachel moaned as she held Susie tightly against her. She didn't want to hear that he'd been as helpless to save Janet as she'd been. For all her worrying about Jack, now she wished he'd been out, had come in to beg for attention and caught the men, killed them all for what they'd done. Susie was still trembling in her arms when the door to the suite opened an hour or so later.

"What the hell . . .? Marco, check that room. Move that table!" The door opened and Raoul stood there, a gun in his hand. He gestured with it. "Into the corner." Sanchez did as he was told. "Where's Janet?"

"Your friends raped her," Rachel snarled at him. He'd been emotionless during all of her previous taunts, but this time his face filled with rage. "Guess Gallucci forgot that _none_ of us were supposed to be hurt, and those bastards came in, drugged her, and raped her. Is this what you signed up for, Raoul? Did you know what sort of man you were working for?"

"I work for a good man," he said quietly. His voice shook. "Marco, what did they give her?"

"Probably heroine," another man answered. "Not enough to overdose on. I can't do anything to help her."

The gun moved again. "Get to work, doctor."

"I'm an obstetrician," Sanchez was saying as he scurried to the door and past Raoul. "But I'll see what I can do."

"Marco, find out who it was." He was still staring at Rachel. "Tell the Joker when you see him."

He hesitated a bit, then turned and walked out. Rachel hoped he died. She hoped he hurt as much as Janet was hurting, and died a slow death. She struggled to sit up and then puked in her own lap, sobbing with rage and shame. She _hurt_. She _hurt_ and she couldn't protect the people she cared about, and Jack wasn't there anymore because the Joker was in charge, now, and the Joker didn't _care_, Jack may have thought he was strong enough to come back but he hadn't been, had he? They were all going to die in this suite of rooms, die and there was nothing she could do to stop it . . .

A wet, warm rag to her mouth woke Rachel up and she struggled blindly for a moment, gasping for air. The Joker stared down at her as he wiped her face off, his expression blank. He looked like he was wiping a spot off the counter, no emotional investment in his gestures at all.

"They raped Janet," she coughed.

"I heard," he replied quietly. He was being gentle, careful, and Rachel quivered in his arms.

"Don't you care?" she whimpered. She couldn't even hold her head up straight. "Raoul's with them. Don't you _care_?"

He opened his mouth and then closed it, settling her back down and pulling the soiled covers off of her. Susie screamed in fear.

"Shut up, Susie," he muttered. "I'm not going to hurt you."

The girl continued screaming, trying to crawl under Rachel, until he'd thrown a clean blanket over them. Once she was out of sight, the child started sobbing. Rachel held the shaking bundle close and rubbed Susie's back as the Joker crouched on the floor and held his fists, one of them clutching a knife, to his head. He was rocking back and forth a bit before loosening his tie and undoing the first few buttons of his shirt. His eyes were blank as he started drawing the knife across his exposed flesh in short nicks. Rachel was too weak to do anything but cry silently as she watched him.

After less than a minute he blinked firmly and shook his head, fixing his clothes as he stood up. "You look like shit."

"I can't feel Ava moving," Rachel whispered. A muscle in his cheek twitched. "I haven't felt her since yesterday." She was going to lose her baby. The only link she had to Jack. His baby girl that he was so ridiculously proud of, but so determined to pretend he wasn't concerned about. Their baby.

"Hope you know a good rehab centre," was all the Joker said as he walked out of the room. Rachel dissolved into tears again.


	29. Chapter 29

"Security doesn't seem tighter than usual," Charles was saying as she studied the floor plans to the Weston building. She idly brushed her fingers across the scratch Catwoman had given her on the way to the Batcave, narrowing her eyes when said woman purred a little. "If they're still following the same routine." None of them looked up when the lift started.

"If they're on the top floor, it'll be easy to get them to the plane," Diana said.

"It's not, they are, and we've had a slight change of plans," the Joker drawled as he sauntered up to them. The small group of superheroes, and one villain, turned sharply and their hands went to their respective weapons. The man held his hands up with a mock-innocent look and wiggled his fingers. "Hey, now, let's take this easy. Don't want to, uh, heh, hurt Jackie now, do you?" The glint in his eyes as he grinned at them was self-assured and relaxed. "Batina, I'm gonna need your . . . _special_ contacts for this. Here's what I need, down to the minute. Get them here as soon as you can." He tossed her a small package that she caught out of reflex, eyeing warily. "It's not gonna explode, doll."

"How'd you get in here?" Catwoman growled at him.

He snorted. "I'm just that good. I need to make a phone call . . ." He wandered over to the surveillance area as he dug a cell phone out of his pocket and dialled a number, his eyes fixed on the GCN news broadcast. The anchor was covering his latest bombing, barely a half hour old, and taking calls on it. Public opinion was firmly against the Joker. The phone rang twice before it patched through. Fox was, the Joker mused, a genius.

"Caller, you're on the line."

"Because Gotham listens when I have something to say," the Joker drawled while Charles pursed her lips at his requests and swung toward a computer. "And believe me, I have something to say."

On the television, the anchor had gone pale. "Who --- Joker ---"

"See, now, I don't _like_ that name much," the man interrupted. "And I thought, since it's been so long, this city might want to know _why_ I'm back, what I want _this_ time. How are you, Mike? Oh, don't worry, I'm not planning on hanging you upside-down again." He chortled to himself. "Glad to see you're still around."

"Ah . . . And . . . what do you want?" the anchor asked after a moment of silence.

There was a long, drawn-out hiss of breath. "What's been taken from me," the man in paint growled. "See, Marco Gallucci, head of most of the crime in Gotham, thinks that he can take what's mine, _keep_ it from me, _abuse_ it, and --- and this is the important part --- _get away with it_. Now, I was all set to play a_long_ with him, take out other crime families for him, cause trouble for your Justice Club, but then Gallucci made a _very. Big. Mistake_. Do you know what that mistake _was_?"

". . . No. What was it?" the man asked.

The Joker turned with a snarl, pacing. "He _hurt_ things that _belong_ to me. And in _doing_ so, he's broken his _word_ --- and I can't stand _liars_ and _oath-breakers_. Fortunately, since he's broken his promise, I'm free from _my_ promise." There was ugly laughter. "If Marco Gallucci doesn't give me what's mine within twenty-four hours, I'm going to stop being careful with Gotham's sweet citizens. They may start dying."

For all his obvious fear, Mike Engel, GCN's main news anchor for almost twenty years, was holding up remarkably well. Especially considering he'd come face-to-face with the Joker on the man's first rampage through Gotham. "What did he take, if I may ask?"

"My family," the Joker whispered. He laughed at the look on Engel's face. "I want Rachel and Ava Dawes, and Janet and Susie Mills, released into the care of a hospital which I've already specified to Gallucci. Why so shocked? Why did you _think_ I came back? See, these days I don't care so much about killing people; I'm not a_gainst_ it, but I've found other things to . . . better occupy my time."

"But . . . Over eighty ---"

The Joker waved his hand. "Criminals. Murderers." His voice dropped to a gut-twisting growl. "Rapists. People who deserve to die. It doesn't matter. We'd found a life we all wanted, we all were happy with --- you know Rachel's pregnant, right? I'm going to be a father." His voice warmed. "Ava Mirelle Dawes . . . It means 'desired miracle,' you know. I named her." He was proud, and it showed through his voice, and Engel sat back in shock. "She's due January ninth, if Gallucci's idiocy hasn't forced Rachel in labour by now."

For a moment there was nothing but the Joker's heavy breathing and a faint growl once in a while, and then he cleared his throat.

"So see, I've got a lot of good things going for me. We're going to adopt Janet and Susie, too. I'm more of a jokester these days, you know . . . You should see some of the pranks the high school boys and I get up to." Now he giggled, full of mirth, but once more went serious. "Gallucci's overstepped his bounds, and I want my family back. You have . . . twenty-three hours and . . . fifty-six minutes."

"But --- If Gallucci doesn't ---"

"Well, now, that's up to _him_, isn't it? If he gives me what's mine, you're all safe. I'm a man of my word, as you know."

"Why not just go to the police?"

The Joker sighed and wandered over to Catwoman, scratching her behind her makeshift ears. She hissed at him. He ignored her. "Look, Mike, since we've got a history together, I'll level with you. I'm tired of doing this. This is a message, to leave me the hell alone. I could live my life quite happily with my girls and Rachel, see, because with them, I don't _need_ to raise hell. I don't _need_ to blow shit up and threaten to kill people, engineer mass destruction . . . Although I'm not gonna lie, it _is_ fun to do. But see, Susie --- she's the youngest, after Ava, of course --- Susie doesn't _care_ that I used to kill people. It doesn't _scare_ her like it scares adults. In fact, after I first met her I asked her if she was afraid of me, and she said no, because . . . well, her main reasoning was that I did everything Rachel told me to do, so Rachel must be the boss of me, and Rachel would never let me hurt someone." He screwed his face up in a bemused smile, and then laughed at the slightly nervous chuckle Engel let out. "Yeah. Kids. She never cared, see. Right from the start she was all over me, wanting piggyback rides and to be tossed in the air . . . She just wanted someone to _love_ her." His voice got quiet. "So did I. And Rachel loves me. She's got more reason than anyone else to hate me, but she loves me. She tells me Ava's going to love me, too --- Hey, I can get her to calm down by singing to her; works like a charm and lets Rachel get some rest at night. I'm not going to let Gallucci screw that up," the Joker went on after clearing his throat. The moment of personal revelation was over. "He's wasted fifteen minutes. If I have to go in and _get_ my family," the Joker growled, "I'm going in for blood." The line went dead and the man turned to the group of heroes. "What?"

"How much of that was a lie?" Wonder Woman asked after a moment of silence. On the television, Engel was being flooded with calls that were abruptly in support of the Joker.

The man in question pursed his lips and rolled his eyes up as her considered her question. "Uh . . . Five percent. Roughly."

"And specifically . . . ?"

"The part about Gallucci having twenty-four hours." He leaned over the table and pursed his lips at the floor plan of the Weston building, taking up an orange marker. "Sentries here, on these floors," he said as he dotted the paper. "Shift change is routine: on the hour, every four hours. Got a hold of your guys yet? We'll need a perimeter here, and a blockade right up front, after we're all in. Hey, Bondage Girl." The princess ignored his jibe and tilted her head at the plans he was drawing up. "That plane of yours . . . it'll hold three passengers, right? And they'll all stay invisible?"

"Depends on the passengers. If you're thinking Rachel and the girls, they'll be fine, and won't be visible until they're out of the plane. How do you know Gallucci won't up his security? Once he gets your threat, he's going to tighten it."

"Doesn't have the manpower," the Joker returned as he shook his head. "Plus, he's let me get a little too close to some information sources. He's got a lot going on right now. I know how to keep someone looking the wrong direction," he said loudly, overriding her protests. "I've been working on this for months. The only thing I'm really concerned about is Janet."

"What about her?" Charles demanded before turning back to her phone. "Not you, Sir. No, Sir. Go on, Sir."

The look of fury on his face made even Wonder Woman step back. "Some of Gallucci's thugs drugged and raped her. I've got someone watching her twenty-four/seven, now, but . . ." His hands clenched in fists of rage and the man shook as he spluttered incoherently.

Diana lowered her head to give him the illusion of privacy, turning a blind eye to the tears that fell down his face when he finally returned his attention to their plans. "How will you find Gallucci?" she asked softly.

"He'll be trussed up like a turkey, waiting to be carved. I've got people on the inside." His voice cracked on the last word, but the man who had been Jack cleared his throat and went on. "Chuckie, you done yet?"

"Yes, Sir. Thirteen hundred today. We move in at fifteen hundred. Oo-rah, Sir." She planted her fists on the table and glared at the Joker. He held his hand out and she handed him a piece of paper. He entered the number into his phone with a nod. "You planned _everything_," she accused.

"I always do," was the absent reply before he sighed. "Not all of this is going according to plan."

"What happened to Janet isn't your fault."

"_Yes it is_!" the Joker bellowed. Diana leaned back a little, but didn't try to convince him further. He coughed and shook himself. "They won't know you're all involved until it's too late. The Marines ought to keep them occupied for a while. If we're lucky, we can grab Rachel and the girls and be gone before anyone notices." He cracked his neck. "I've gotta go."

He left without another word.

***

The Joker looked down at the girl on the bed as his men stood guard and pursed his lips. How to go about this? He needed her down from her heroine high, but able to function while off of it, all without losing it when a man touched her. He chewed on the insides of his scars and finished wiping his face off before adjusting his overcoat.

"Janet?"

She twitched and whined a little, forcing bleary eyes open as one hand flung itself out, track marks in her arm. "Please," she mouthed.

Jack sat on the edge of the bed and took her hand in his, his eyes tightening when she winced at the physical contact. "No, honey, I need you to listen to me. Will you listen to me?" There was a small sound from the doorway and he held his free hand out without looking. "Come here, Susie."

"Is that you, Daddy?"

"Just for a bit," he said. "Come here." The girl wasted no time in flinging herself at him, sobbing into his embrace. Jack took just a moment to calm her down before wiping her tears away, kissing her cheeks. "Shh, shh, sweety . . . Stop crying, now. I need you two to help me." Janet was twitching again, legs spasming while she bent almost double and groaned. Jack sighed and took out a small kit, talking as he opened it and started setting up what he hated himself for needing to do. "Susie, some people are going to come visit you. They're going to take all of you out of here, do you understand?"

"You're rescuing us?" she asked.

Jack smiled as he nodded, finding the right vein and not shaking as he injected more heroin into Janet's system. "That's right, I am. I'm leaving a bow and arrows for you, and a gun for Janet. Can you hear me, Janet?" She was smiling now, nodding dreamily. He smoothed her hair out of her face. "Do you want those men to die, Janet?"

"Uh?" She blinked at him, still riding the drug high, and nodded. "Okay? Do you want me to suck your ---"

"No," he cut her off firmly. "You don't ever need to do that again, Janet, and I'm going to kill the men who made you do it. Do you understand? They won't hurt you again."

The smile she gave him was angelic. "I love you, Jack . . ."

He smiled and kissed her forehead. "I love you, too, baby. Get some sleep. I need you to be rested, okay? Look, it's noon. I'll be back at three-thirty. Can you two make sure Rachel's ready?"

"Okay," Susie promised fervently. Then she looked down, only raising her eyes to look at him. "Do you . . . Do you have to be the Joker again now, Daddy?"

Jack sighed and nodded. "I do, baby. But I promise, he's going to be a lot nicer to you, all right?"

The girl considered, tugging at her auburn hair, and then she nodded. "Okay. Can I tell Rachel we're leaving?"

"I'll let her know, poppet. You just make sure Janet's awake and ready to go. If you do good today, I'll get you a kitten. I have to go, now." He pulled the girl into a fierce hug and rubbed his nose against hers. She was trying not to cry. "I love you, Susie. I love all of you. Don't you _ever_ forget that, all right?" She nodded, tears falling down her face, and he set her next to her sister with another kiss for each of them before leaving the room and sliding down the wall once the door had closed. Jack clenched his fists in his hair and rocked back and forth. "Please," he whispered. "Please. Let's make a deal. We can both have what we really want. Let's just . . . cooperate."

After a few minutes he stood, much more composed, and went into Rachel's room. She was on her side, staring off into space or maybe sleeping with her eyes wide open. She didn't move when he closed the door, however, and he was crouching next to her before he saw that she was still breathing.

"Rachel?" Her only response was half a blink and it tore him up. "Look, bunny," the Joker sneered as he got tired of her silence, "things are about to uh, _heat up_, you know?" He tied his long hair back in a ponytail, having rinsed the green out earlier. "I need you ready to go."

"Jack," she whispered.

The man pursed his lips and leaned down, pressing them to hers gently as his hands pressed against her stomach. The resulting movement from his daughter was faint, but there. It was enough for now. "We're working on that, sweet. Three-thirty. Be ready. We have to go." He stood and shook his head as he walked out of the room. "Don't you dare start blubbering, you damned pussy . . . Doc, three-thirty, have them all ready to go." Sanchez raised his eyebrows and nodded. The Joker left, humming. "We've got a _lot_ to do --- is it one lump or two? . . ."

***

At two-thirty, on opposite sides of town, two of Marco Gallucci's main warehouses imploded. The men guarding the small fortune of drugs were nowhere to be found.

At two-forty-five, Gotham City's public school and parks systems received anonymous donations totalling over four million dollars, received in boxes wrapped in bright orange, blue, and purple paper. At the same time, south-east and south-west of the main warehouses, two more smaller buildings disintegrated from within. Police response was unnaturally slow.

At three, due south of the two main warehouses, half a mile south of the second explosions and half a mile closer, two more buildings went. There were no civilian casualties. Large teddy bears stuffed with toys were deposited at the steps of the city's children's hospitals, while their bank account balances almost quadrupled.

At three-fifteen, half a mile south and half a mile closer, two more building went. In his office, Jim Gordon circled the largest two explosions in black, then took two red pens, held one down on either secondary explosion, and dragged them down and together in a curve. The Weston building was in the centre. As the city's homeless shelters and various aide programs received donations totalling nearly ten million dollars, the number of phone calls to GCN and local radio stations in support of "the Jokester" grew. The red face grinned at Jim as the Two/Twenty-Fifth Marine Corps Infantry Battalion flooded his city.

He smiled back.


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N:** Accio sev says I'm a genius. Everyone, thank Accio sev, because in honour of my official geniosity, here's chapter 30.

***

He slid between the gathered Marines easily and stopped by the Colonel. "Why so glum?"

The man jerked a bit and frowned more as he turned back to look at the Weston building. "You're a crazy son of a bitch, but Rivard says you're trustworthy. Wonder Woman's getting your family from the roof?" He turned and barked an order at three Marines, who saluted sharply and started unloading battering rams and what looked like smoke grenades.

The Joker nodded while another transport truck dropped off more Marines. The building was surrounded, and there hadn't been any gunfire yet. "My men are letting me in to get them in two minutes. Move in two minutes after that. Terminate with extreme prejudice." He raised his phone and dialled a pre-programmed number. "Move in," was all he said, then twisted at the waist to look up and behind him when the roar of a jet passed overhead. The sky was empty.

***

Rachel had fallen asleep after the Joker had left her. Or maybe she'd dreamt the whole thing. Maybe it didn't matter. She felt the jab of a needle in her arm and was ready to welcome oblivion, but for the small issue of waking up fully for the first time in days. Sanchez was beside her and there was a clown in the doorway, facing away from her as the doctor sat her up and offered her new clothes to put on. She could see Janet and Susie in the main room.

"Please, Mrs. Dawes, put these on."

She looked at the clothing, then at Sanchez and frowned. "What's happening?"

The man looked out the window briefly. There was smoke on the horizon. "We're leaving. Your husband will be here soon."

"What?" She struggled to change her top, ignoring Sanchez even as he turned his face away. "Jack, or the Joker?"

The man shrugged. "Both. Either. Does it matter? Something's been happening all over town for almost an hour. Can you get up?" He had to help her, but soon enough Rachel was on her feet and in the main room, where Janet was finishing loading a pistol. The clown at the door, and the four scattered across the room, were all female.

Janet looked up and handed Susie a quiver of arrows. "I'm going with Jack."

"What are you talking about?" Rachel asked. She had to sit down, panting as her stomach tightened. "How's he getting back up here?"

"Walking in the front door," Raoul said from the main doorway. Rachel jumped and he held both hands out, empty. "We have," and he checked his watch, "ten minutes and thirty seconds to get you to the service elevator at the other end of the building. Are you ready to go?" There were two men behind him in the hallway.

"Janet, shoot him."

"Not a good idea," the man said shortly. "I need you to trust me, Rachel."

"Why should I?" she demanded as she pulled her hair back. "You've been working for the mob the entire time I've known you!"

"Longer, actually. About three years longer than I've been working for Gordon." The man looked at his watch and brushed his bangs back with a scowl. "Look, Maroni helped my family out when I was thirteen. I worked for him, paying off our debt, for three years --- well, it was Gallucci after Maroni died. But after three years I'd had enough and went to Jim. Jim had me stay and feed him information, and when I was a senior in high school, Gallucci wanted me to think about joining the police force. Jim thought it was a great idea." He was shifting from foot to foot, irritated at the time being wasted. Finally Raoul sighed and sat in a chair, his head in his hands. "Look, I didn't . . . I'm sorry, Rachel. Janet, Susie, I'm _sorry_. I can't do anything to make it better, I know, but . . . Gallucci didn't _tell me_ about anything he was planning for you all. I knew he was up to something, but I didn't know when he was going to try to take you all. I tried to find out. He . . . doesn't trust me as much as he used to. And I don't expect _you_ to ever trust me again," Raoul went on as he stood, "but for now I need you to. The Justice League will be here in eight minutes to get you. All of you."

"I'm going with Jack," Janet repeated firmly. She was glaring at Raoul, who was glaring back as he gestured out the door. "You're not stopping me. He'll need help."

"I'll be with him." He gave her a wide berth as she stalked out of the room with Susie on her heels, then beckoned to the men outside. They came in and stood on either side of Rachel, lifting her gently. "You, too, Doctor."

Rachel couldn't have put up a fight if she'd tried. She just glared at the back of Raoul's head as he walked them quickly down the hallway. The clowns the Joker had left behind spilled out of the room, taking up rear guard positions with two of them up front with Raoul.

"Does Hideki know?"

Raoul turned his head slightly. "No. This way." He ducked around a corner and into an open doorway. "Are you ready?"

"You're late."

"Rachel's stubborn. Janet's not much better."

The Joker was standing in front of a row of men, all tied to chairs and gagged, when Rachel was brought into the room. He turned to her with a grin. His outfit was clean, for once, and his face was almost devoid of paint, what was left only smeared streaks as he sweated.

"Glad you could join us. Come in, come in! We have just enough time. Look who came to visit, Gallucci," he said in a sing-song voice. He grabbed one of the men by the hair and forced his head up. "This is my family, remember? You _promised_ me you wouldn't let them get hurt, and look at them _now_."

"I gave orders to leave them alone," the man gasped.

The Joker shot him between the eyes. "Yeah, I don't have time to monologue right now. Janet, come here. Do you recognise these men?" The girl was shaking as she nodded. He took her hands and tightened her grip on her pistol as he brushed hair out of her face. She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "I can't take back what I let them do to you," he whispered. "I'll never forgive myself for not keeping a closer watch on you. I'm sorry, Janet. Bu-ut," he snarled as he turned back to the terrified men, "I've always felt that killing the people who hurt you is _wonderfully_ therapeutic. Don't you agree?" This was said to the men, who looked at the shaking and terrified Janet and relaxed a little. The Joker's voice softened. "They hurt you, Janet. You can make sure they never hurt anyone else again."

"Janet, no," Rachel pleaded softly. Everyone looked at her. "You don't have to kill them, Janet. Joker, don't make her do this! She's not a kill---"

An arrow whizzed by and struck one of the men in the chest. He jerked, gurgling, as the rest of the men started yelling against the ropes in their mouths.

"You're bad people," Susie said as the small group turned to her in shock. She had another arrow knocked and let it fly, striking another man square in the chest. "You hurt my sister. You hurt Miss Rachel. You hurt Ava. You hurt _me_." She was crying, now, as the Joker smiled. "You took my Daddy away from me! I hate you all!"

"Go outside, Susie," Janet said sharply. She knelt by her sister and hugged her tightly. "Go with Rachel. I'll be fine, Susie, I promise. I need to help Jack, all right? You help Rachel."

"I want Daddy back," the child demanded as she glared at the Joker.

He'd just slit a man's throat and looked at her with raised eyebrows. "And you can have him back, sugar, just as soon as I'm done here. Now get out." He went back to work, methodically slitting throats, and looked to the side after a moment. "I meant all of you. You're not a killer, Janet." She pressed her gun to the last man's temple and fired as she looked at the Joker. He jumped; he hadn't been expecting her to actually kill a man.

"I feel better," was all she said. Then she leaned to the side and threw up. "Where are we going now?" she asked as the Joker moved her hair out of her way.

"What's this 'we' business?" he asked lightly. He was grinning when she looked up at him. He offered her some gum. "We need to find Anita and Maury. They haven't left the building; I've got all the exits covered, and then some, but there are a lot of places to hide."

"Where do we start?" Janet asked quietly. She was following close behind him, still trembling, but for the most part steady.

They'd come upon several bodies that were still breathing, and the Joker frowned. "Follow the trail," he murmured. And follow it they did, Raoul finding them a few minutes later and confirming that Rachel and Susie were on their way to Metropolis General.

"What the hell is _this_?" the young man asked as he toed at an unconscious gangster.

"Beats me," the Joker murmured back. The faint sounds of a fight drifted to them and as they rounded a corner, Raoul grabbed Janet and pulled her to the side when a body went flying past. It hit the wall and crumpled with a moan, and the trio stared at the man in black who was delivering a roundhouse kick to another thug's jaw. The kick lifted him up in a sideways spin, during which he managed to land two more kicks on two more men before hitting the ground in a crouch and popping back up. He surveyed the bodies littered around him with satisfaction before turning to his dumb-founded audience.

"What?" Hideki asked innocently. He followed their gazes to the floor and shrugged. "What? I'm Asian. _All_ Asians know martial arts." Then he jogged up to Raoul and punched him in the jaw. "You could have _told_ me you were working both sides," he growled as he lifted Raoul up by the collar and shook him. "I was so _fucking_ worried about you!"

"I'm sorry!" his husband gasped out.

"Fight later; where are Anita and Maury?"

Hideki lowered Raoul and glared at the Joker. "Safe. _Some_body needs to go on trial for this, Jack. Trust me, with all the dirt you gave the DA's office, they'll be in jail for the rest of their lives. By the way, all your packages were delivered. They've renamed you the Jokester."

"Great, I'm a fucking superhero, now." The man in purple growled and kicked at the floor, then took a deep breath and looked to the right. The sounds of approaching Marines were now clearly audible. "Hideki, get out of here. Raoul, shoot me."

"What?!"

"I'll do it!" Before the Joker could turn, Janet had shot him in the side and he went down with a startled yell.

"Damn it!" he cursed at her. "You bitch!"

"I feel lots better," was all she said, smug as Hideki took off running. "Why'd I shoot you?"

"Because you're a bitch," the man gasped. "They'll need to take me to the hospital."

"I'll make sure it's Met Gen," Raoul promised. He took Janet's gun from her and wiped it clean, then wrapped it in the hands of the nearest unconscious man. "Man down!" he called out, moments before the first Marine rounded the corner. "Sergeant Raoul Gillespie, Gotham PD!"

"Kneel down and put your hands on your heads!" the lead Marine barked. Raoul complied and tugged at Janet, who was frozen to the spot. "Now!"

"Janet, get down," he hissed at her.

"She's one of the civilians," Batgirl interrupted as she broke through the group of Marines. She took Janet by the arm and peered up at her intently. "Janet?"

"Charles?" the girl asked in confusion.

That got a smile. "Yeah, it's me. Keep it to yourself. Where are Rachel and Susie? Did Wonder Woman get them?"

"Ten minutes ago," Raoul confirmed as he was relieved of all his weapons.

"Who shot the Jokester?"

"Uhm . . . I did . . ." That brought a howl of laughter as Batman rounded a corner with Anita in one hand and Maury in the other.

"What's so funny?" he snarled.

"Janet shot the Jokester," Batgirl chortled.

She got an impressed look. "Well, thank God _somebody_ finally shot the bastard."

"I hate you all," the bastard moaned. A medic knelt by him and started calling out orders. "Oh, fuck . . ."

"Met Gen's the safest hospital right now," Batman went on, ignoring his friend's pain. "The other civilians are on their way there. Come on." The group split up, Batgirl staying with the bulk of her Marines while two medics picked up the Jokester and followed Batman, Raoul, and Janet. "They've cleared the rest of the building." He didn't seem to notice his captives, or the way they were dragging along the floor. "We're going out the front, hands up, nice and slow. Jokester's managed to not only hand over almost all the mob's information to the police, but to give away almost all of their money. Public support's on his side. Doctor Morgenson's outside with Gordon."

"Oh, fuck no," the Jokester gasped out. "Not Doc. He'll kill me. No, he won't. He'll _look_ at me. He'll just . . . _look_ at me."

"I'm counting on it," Batman said, finally cracking a smile.

"Fucking hate you _all_ . . . How's Rachel? Is Ava all right?"

"We won't know until they get to Metropolis." Bruce looked down at the man and reached out to touch his shoulder. "We'll get you there as soon as we can."

"Want my family," the Jokester mumbled, eyes rolling back in his head. "Bitch shot me . . ."

"You wanted me to."

"Wanted _him_ to." One hand tried to gesture at Raoul as the elevator they'd piled into came to a stop. The Marines were talking to their commanding officer, letting him and the police know the group was coming out. "Feel better, bunny?"

Janet wiped at her eyes and took his hand, squeezing it. "You're an asshole."

"Take that as a yes, then." The Jokester smiled painfully up at her. "I'm so sorry . . ."

"Shut up before I shoot you again."

"Do it," Batman urged.

"You got two women after you and you're _still_ mad I got Rachel. Selfish pussy."

"Shut up," Raoul told the two men as the group was hustled out the broken front doors. Police rifles came up, then lowered after a moment, and then Gordon and Morgenson pushed through the barricade. Raoul saluted Gordon. "Commissioner Gordon, sir."

Gordon saluted him back with a smile. "Sergeant Gillespie. Good work. Who shot _him_?"

"Janet did, sir."

Gordon laughed. "_Finally_. We've all wanted to shoot him for years."

"Fuck _you_!" the Jokester cried out shrilly. "See if I help ever again! Ow, damn it! That fucking _hurts_!"

"Walk it off, Marine," Colonel Rogers told him cheerfully. "Drink some water; you'll be fine."

"Not a goddamn Marine," was the Jokester's petulant reply as he was loaded into a waiting helicopter.

"With the kind of tactical ability you have, you ought to have been. You need medical attention, miss?" he asked Janet. Batgirl nodded and ushered her in after the Jokester, climbing in after her. "Get them to Met Gen," Rogers ordered the pilot. He got and returned a salute.

"I'd like to go, too, if I may. Jack is a patient of mine."

The Colonel looked like he was about to protest until the Jokester started moaning protests and Batman grinned. Then he relented, waving Morgenson inside. "Report back once you get there."

"Sir," Charles replied.

"Now, let's clean this mess up. Who the hell are _they_?"

The helicopter taking off muffled the rest of the conversation and the Jokester scowled when he smelled Morgenson's cologne, but he didn't open his eyes.

"I think you have a lot to tell me."

"Want my family."

Jim Morgenson looked down at the man he'd come to see as a sort of son and let his breath out slowly. "And if you play your cards right, you can see them again. I need you to tell me what happened, why you brought the Joker back."

"Don't _call_ us that," he was begged. "Keep Janet safe. They ---"

He'd stopped himself, but the look on Janet's face was enough and Morgenson nodded. "Janet, I'm Jim Morgenson," he said evenly.

"You're Jack's doctor." He nodded. Janet looked down at the Jokester. "Jack told me once that . . . he wishes you were his father." She got a groan of protest from the wounded man, but he didn't deny her words.

"I'm honoured," the older man said simply.

***

After the initial rush when she'd been admitted, the hospital room that Rachel and Susie had been placed in was eerily quiet. The little girl had almost been lost in the shuffle, except for one nurse recognizing her and keeping her with Rachel. There was a soft tap at the door.

"Rachel? Are you awake?"

"Come in," she called out weakly. The plane ride had been terrifying, not least because it had been invisible. Diana, who had insisted on being called by her given name, had assured Rachel that the plane was not only perfectly safe, but perfectly sentient and capable of changing shape into anything it wanted; they were in no danger of crashing or falling out.

Not the most comforting choice of words.

"I've brought you two some soup. Do you think you can keep it down?" Noelle asked as she came into the room.

"I'm hungry," Susie said from under the bed. She wasn't there out of fear, but to surprise anyone coming into the room who shouldn't be there. She didn't seem to care that her bow and arrows had been taken away from her; her teeth worked just fine.

"Of course you are, dear. Come on out and have a bite." The older woman busied herself making sure Rachel was comfortable as Susie inched into view, struggling a little. "That doctor you had with you took good care of you, Rachel. You won't . . . Ava will be premature," and Noelle covered Rachel's hand when the younger woman closed her eyes, tears falling out of them, "but the doctors are sure she'll survive. You're not going to lose her, Rachel."

Rachel shook her head. "But, Jack ---"

"Was brought in an hour ago, along with Janet. They're stitching him up now and Janet was being examined, the last I heard. I came up as soon as I could to tell you." She kissed Rachel's forehead and smiled at Susie. "They're both all right. Alive."

"Why did he need stitches?"

"Janet shot him in the side, apparently."

Rachel sighed and let Noelle feed her. "Probably did it to get sent here," she muttered between mouthfuls.

"I wouldn't be surprised."

"I called him Brandon. I'm sorry, Noelle."

That made Jack's mother laugh. "Dearest, I'm resigned to knowing Jack doesn't want anything to do with me. I don't blame him. I spent years trying to convince myself that I'd saved him, when I should have gone to the police and gotten him back." She wiped at Rachel's mouth a bit before sitting back and letting Susie crawl into her lap. "I'm sure he'll be screaming for you as soon as he's out of surgery. I'll see if I can arrange a visit. But you need to rest, now. You're safe."

"I helped," Susie said, not wanting to be left out.

Noelle kissed her forehead. "Of course you did, Susie; you were very brave. I convinced Superman to keep an eye on you; he won't spy, but he'll be around."

"Before or after he files a harassment lawsuit against you for grabbing his rear?" Rachel wanted to know.

That brought laughter that had clearly been passed on to Jack. "Oh, I went for the front, this time."

"_Ew_," Susie gasped.

The older women laughed before Noelle got up to finish her rounds.


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N:** Oh hai thar. The whole Brandon/Noelle thingy, guis? It was a series of short e-mails I wrote up and posted on the original site I was posting Speak & Sing; I'll give you the address later, or maybe post them here. We'll see. It was sort of a treat for everyone on the other list. But you'll get to read them, never fear! ^.^

***

"Have you seen him?" Rachel demanded as soon as Charles was in the door. "Is he okay? What about Janet?"

"He's awake, restrained, and howling for you, as Nurse McGallagher predicted. The FBI's trying to question him. Janet's . . ." Charles sighed. "They're still examining her. Diana's staying with her. The lassos and super-strength are comforting." She shook her head when Rachel opened her mouth. "The exam can take up to four hours. That's all. Morgenson is with Jack."

"Oh, God, he's going to say all the wrong things," Rachel groaned. "Who is he right now?"

"Hard to know. He's not very coherent. All anyone can get out of him is that he wants his family." She sat down next to Rachel and watched her. "Do you want to see him?"

Rachel blinked at her. "Of course I do. He --- I ---" She waved her hands in frustration. "He needs to know that Ava's all right. I need to know that _he's_ all right. Will they let him see me?"

"I'll ask. They respond well to Marines." She was wearing her Marine Corps dress uniform, the gold-on-red Master Sergeant rank clearly visible against the dark blue of her tunic, her medals covering her left breast and her service ribbons covering her right breast. She had a lot of both; Rachel hadn't realised her friend was quite so decorated. "Superman!" she called. Her voice carried easily and the curtain to the balcony twitched.

"What can I do for you?" the tall, raven-haired man asked from behind it.

"You can come in here so I'm not yelling, for one. Secondly, I need you to bring Jack in here once I get permission."

"If Noelle's around," the man said with a charming grin, "you're on your own."

"You'll do it, or I'll tell everyone you can't legally run for President."

His eyebrows went up. "I was born on America soil."

"You hatched on American soil," Charles returned. "You hatched. There's a difference. And even _if_ you can convince the public that that qualifies as 'birth,' you _still_ can't be President because your _parents_ weren't American citizens. You have to be a natural-born citizen, whose parents were American. Adoption doesn't count, bucko. Now let's get Jack before they kill him." She bent and kissed Rachel's forehead. "We'll be back, Rachel."

"Kiiiii-yah!"

Superman didn't look down when Susie came flying out of the bathroom at him, latching on to his leg and biting for all she was worth. He gave no indication that he even noticed her, walking quite normally out the door with another winning smile for Rachel.

"Susie, leave him alone! Come back here, Susie!"

"It's no problem," the caped man assured her as he picked Susie up and foisted her over his shoulder. She was growling and snapping at him, but seemed content to be carted like a sack of potatoes. "Susie and I are great friends, aren't we?"

"Die, fascist militant scumbag!"

Rachel raised an eyebrow at Superman. He had the grace to look embarrassed. "Well. We're working on it." He glanced out the door as Charles snapped for him to hurry. "Ah . . . Are you all right alone? It shouldn't take more than fifteen minutes. There's an officer outside the door."

"I'll be fine," she managed to say. "Just get my husband." She closed her eyes against the suddenly oppressive emptiness of the room, tensing more and more as the minutes went by. Ava turned over and Rachel immediately rubbed her stomach. She was trying not to cry. "We're safe," she whispered. "We're safe, Ava. Daddy saved us. Daddy," and she choked up a bit, "Daddy will be here soon." She hoped. Oh, God, she hoped they'd let her see Jack. She needed to see him. He needed to see his baby girl. If he was screaming for her then the Joker must not have been able to take him over completely. She couldn't raise this baby on her own. She couldn't lose Jack.

Rachel was sobbing quietly when there was a gentle knock on the door. Embarrassed to be seen in such a state --- her eyes red and puffy, her nose dripping, her hair a complete mess --- she tried to make some order of her appearance as the door opened. The sight of her mother, though, just made her break down again.

"Oh, God, Rachel . . ." Bethany went to her daughter and held her tightly, stroking her hair as both women cried. "I was so worried about you . . . You're safe now, baby, you're safe, it's all right . . ."

"It's n-_not_," Rachel moaned. "They're g-going to t-take J-J-Jack from m-me. We'll ne-ne-never ---"

"Shh, they won't," Bethany cooed. She pressed a kiss to Rachel's temple.

"B-but, Ava ---"

"Rachel, listen, Ava's all right. I talked with your doctors. They said Ava's all right. She'll probably be early, but she's just fine. Jack was smart, Rachel, he did a lot of good things for Gotham this time. They shouldn't put him on trial for anything." She was rubbing Rachel's back firmly, letting her child cry herself out as the stress from the past three weeks finally found an outlet.

Half an hour later Rachel had cried herself to sleep and Bethany sat with her, holding her hand as she watched her only child. Alfred had been and gone, making sure they had a hotel room for at least the night. They'd agreed to take turns sitting with Rachel while the other made arrangements for clothing and personal items to be brought down from Loleta, kept Susie occupied, and took care of whatever might need taken care of for the next few months. There was so much to do, and she'd almost lost her daughter.

Bethany's shoulders shook as tears fell once again. Rachel didn't deserve this. Janet and Susie didn't deserve this. Even Jack didn't deserve this, Jack who called Bethany in the middle of the night when he was overcome by he and Rachel's relationship, when he didn't know how to handle it on his own any more and needed someone to guide him. Jack, who was subconsciously waiting for Rachel to leave him, who told Bethany of his fears of fatherhood, of something happening that would take him away from his daughter. To him, such a simple life was too good to be true. He kept waiting for the other shoe to drop . . .

She was afraid that it just had. Bethany wiped her face clean with the tissues on the stand next to the bed before going into the bathroom and wetting a washcloth. She dabbed at Rachel's face as Susie's voice drifted in to her; hopefully they'd be bringing Jack in, too. They all needed to know that everyone was all right. Bethany covered her mouth and fought back tears when she remembered Janet. She'd been told the girl was being treated for heroin addiction and rape.

"--- so I bit him."

"Did you, now."

"Yeah . . . It hurt my teeth."

"He _is_ the Man of Steel, you know."

"He could have _pretended_."

Dr. Morgenson chuckled as he pushed the door open. "Mrs. Dawes?"

"Rachel's asleep," Bethany replied. She stood up and had to sit back down when the psychiatrist wheeled Jack in. Her son-in-law was bound to a wheelchair at the wrists, elbows, ankles, waist, and chest, with two police officers on either side of him. Susie was pushing the chair, with Morgenson's help. "Oh, Jack . . ."

He didn't seem to notice her. He looked terrible in that hospital gown, with his hair in his bruised face and his scars twisting into a snarl. His dark eyes were trained on Rachel and his hands clenched. He whined a little and strained against his bindings, but all that accomplished was raised firearms.

"She's all right," Morgenson said firmly. "She's just sleeping. Look at the monitors, Jack. Rachel's asleep."

Jack did look, his gaze darting around the room. He was checking the monitors and for any intruders --- and potentially, Bethany realised with a shiver, for a way to escape. She cleared her throat and straightened when that brought his animalistic attention to bear on herself.

"She's been asleep for about fifteen minutes. Do you want me to wake her up?" He blinked at her, then looked back at Rachel and leaned forward as far as he could, whining again in the back of his throat. "Jack, answer me."

He rolled his eyes back and up, toward Morgenson, then looked at Rachel again. ". . . No. Let me hold her hand."

"You're not allowed out of the restraints."

"Let me hold her hand," Jack snapped. The officer who had spoken frowned down at him. "What am I going to do with one hand? I need to be closer." He was wheeled next to the bed at Morgenson's approval and Bethany scooted out of the way. There were unnoticed tears falling down Jack's face and Bethany took Rachel's hand and brought it down to his. He choked a little and held her fingers gently, his own hand shaking as he bowed his head. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm so sorry . . ."

Morgenson knelt by Susie and smiled at her. "You're a very smart girl, Susie. Do you want to find out exactly how smart you really are?"

"You can do that?" she asked in awe. "Daddy says I'm a freaking genius. That's smarter than a regular genius."

"I can," the man said with a soft laugh. Rachel shifted in the bed and he glanced up, then held his hand out. "Let's go find out, all right?"

The child looked at Jack and Rachel, then at Bethany. "Is it all right, Gramma?"

"Of course it is," Bethany told her as she got up. She waved the two officers out. "Wait outside; give them a little privacy, for heaven's sake."

"Ma'am, we were given orders ---"

"Just _do it_," Bethany snapped.

"Time alone with Rachel will be good for Jack's mental stability right now," the psychiatrist seconded. "Come along, Susie."

Jack stared at Rachel's hand before raising his eyes to her face. She was laying on her side and someone had tucked some pillows around her to keep her comfortable. Her fingers were warm against his.

"I should leave," he murmured. It hurt to think it, much less say it. "You're all better off without me."

"I need you," Rachel whispered.

Jack looked up quickly and swallowed past the lump in his throat. "I've managed to destroy almost everything. No one will ever let me near Ava or the girls again. It's not . . . safe . . ."

"Will he try to hurt them?"

Jack shook his head before shrugging. "He says he won't. I don't . . . Look, this, a, a family, people to love and be loved by, it's what we always wanted. We never got it, but . . . we wanted it. He's willing to . . . step aside. Stay out of the way. He brought me out, so we're . . ." Jack sighed and lowered his head. "I don't know. Integrating, whatever you want to call it. He likes this Jokester idea people've got now. He thinks Gotham's his, he should be the only one causing mayhem. If we've done this right, hopefully the FBI will overlook us not telling them about Anita and Maury. We took down almost the entire mob, and the police should have enough information to crack down on the rest. That's gotta count for something, right?"

Rachel's hand left his, then her fingers pressed gently against his chin until Jack looked up at her again. "Jack. Listen to me." He leaned toward her when she ran her fingers through his curls, scratched his scalp gently. "I love you. Janet and Susie love you. Ava loves you --- yes, she does. Trust me. You are the best thing to happen to _all_ of us, and I don't want to split this family up. But it's not going to be up to us." He closed his eyes and hunched inward a little. Rachel shifted so she could touch him more comfortably. "I think you have a point about the FBI, but I'll talk with Bruce and see what his lawyers think; you know he's going to insist on paying for whatever happens."

Jack snorted, opening his eyes once more. Rachel struggled until she was sitting up, then slowly eased off of the bed and into her husband's lap despite his half-hearted protests. She wrapped her arms around him and he rested his cheek against her breast, inhaling deeply.

"I need you, both of you, on your absolute best behaviour. I've been thinking about what might happen and how we need to handle it. What's left of the mob will be put on trial. Their lawyers will do their best to make _you_ into the bad guy." Rachel rested one palm on Jack's cheek and leaned her forehead against his. "No sarcasm, Jack," she whispered. "No tantrums. Cooperate. Don't give anyone anything to use against you, please."

"The better-behaved I am, the more likely it is they won't take you away from me?" he asked.

Rachel bit her lower lip and blinked back tears. "The more likely it is they won't keep us apart forever."

Jack raised his eyebrows. "They'll send me back to Arkham, won't they? Even if everything goes perfectly."

She nodded. "I'm sorry, Jack. I can't think of anything that will keep you out of that place. I don't ---" Rachel's voice caught and she took a few panting breaths to calm herself down before continuing. "I don't want you to go. But for Ava, for Janet and Susie . . ."

"The state will need to know I'm not a threat to my children," Jack finished quietly. He leaned his head back and fought against the other's anger. They'd known something like this would happen. It wasn't a big surprise. Painful to have confirmed, yes, but not surprising. "How long do you think I'll be there? Will they let you --- no, I don't want you near that place. Not you, not Ava, not anyone."

"We'll see about visits," Rachel promised. "I can't guess how long you might be there, but if you behave no matter what, I'm positive that we'll be able to work out a, a day or weekend out of Arkham."

"Eventually," Jack murmured.

Rachel nodded. "Eventually."

"I'm sorry, Rachel. I didn't want this to happen. I just wanted . . . I wanted you all to be safe."

"Well, you should have included _you_ in that wish, man. Saved us all a lot of grief," Tom mumbled from the doorway. Jack and Rachel both looked up in surprise. Tom was leaning against the wall, bandages criss-crossing the lower half of his face and leaving his lips uncovered. "Told 'em it was just a hunch, out by Folsom. Dunno if they believed me. Glad you're alive."

"You, too," Jack muttered. "Help Rachel lay back down."

She didn't protest, just reached her hand out for Jack's again, once she was nestled securely in the bed. "How are you healing?" she asked.

Tom snorted and ghosted his fingers over his cheeks. "Some crazy singer chick paid for the surgeries." He sat down next to Jack with a sigh. "Never paid attention to what doctors can do these days. They say the nerves'll grow back just fine, and no one'll ever be able to tell I was cut up like a turkey." He looked at Jack. "You ought to consider it."

"They're a part of me."

"An old part. Outdated." Tom waved his hand as Jack frowned. "Whatever. I'm doped up, man. Get to go home today. Tomorrow. Soon." Then he groaned. "I'm sorry, man."

"It's fine," Jack muttered. "Look, I'll be in Arkham for a while. Maybe a long time. I need you to look after Rachel and the girls for me."

Tom was quiet for a long time before he nodded. "No problem, Jack. Anything you need."

"I'm sorry I got you hurt."

The other man snorted. "Wasn't your fault. Thought I could handle it; I was wrong. How long are you in here for?"

Jack shrugged. "Just got out of surgery. Dunno."

"Yeah, I heard Janet shot you. Lucky girl."

Jack scoffed. "You know what? Fuck you. After _all_ the good shit I did for Gotham and everyone, not_ one damn person _ takes pity on me for being shot. I swear, I am _never_ going to help again. Ever."

Rachel was smiling at him. "_I'__m_ sorry you got shot, Jack. I'm glad you're all right."

That mollified him somewhat, but Tom was snorting with laughter and Jack glared at him. "You're lucky I'm strapped down, Tom."

"Don't I know it," his friend agreed cheerfully. "They've had me seeing a shrink while I'm here. Think they'll put you in the psych ward while you recuperate from your, ah, battle wounds?"

Jack glared at him again, then shrugged. "I was hoping for that bed right there," and he jerked his chin at the other bed in the room, "but I doubt they'll let me have it."

"I think I managed to talk the doctor into putting Janet and Susie in here, once Janet's cleared," Rachel offered. "They're doing what they can to keep us together. Mom and Alfred are taking care of . . . well, whatever we need taken care of, here and at home."

"What about the kitten?"

"We'll take it, for now," Tom offered. "Can you keep the foster system from taking the girls?"

"Rachel's Bruce-fucking-Wayne's best friend," Jack said. "They don't stand a chance. _I_ may not be a fit parent, but Rachel's more than fit. With me out of the way ---"

"Stop it, Jack. Don't talk like that!"

"It's true," he argued. "With me in Arkham, Janet and Susie will be fine with you. Besides, Janet's got, what, a year and a half until she's eighteen? I'm sure I'll be in Arkham for at least that long." He hated thinking about it. "When she's eighteen she can petition for custody of Susie, if she wants. Weren't you saying the house was left to them? I mean, Mary's house? No mortgage or anything, right?"

Rachel closed her eyes with a heavy sigh. "True. But that doesn't mean you're staying in Arkham for the rest of your life."

Jack rolled his eyes. "Bunny, if I wanted out of Arkham, nothing could stop me. But I'll stay until I'm cleared to leave. It just . . . might take a while."

There was a knock on the door. "Rachel? Jack?"

"Come in, Bethy," he called.

She smiled at him and Rachel. "You look better."

He twisted his face into a scowl when she kissed his cheek. "_You_ think it's funny that I got shot, too, don't you?"

"Not at all. I think it's hilarious that it was a sixteen-year-old girl who shot you, but I don't think it's funny that you got shot."

"Even the people who are on my side think it's funny," Jack muttered. He looked up at the police officers who had come in and sighed. "Fine, fine, take me away. I'm cooperating, see? See how cooperative I'm being? Wait. Hold up." Jack looked back at Rachel. "I love you."

"I love you, too," she whispered with a smile.


	32. Chapter 32

They liked the gardens. The gardens were clean, chilly in the early December sunlight, but Bethany had fussed over him and tucked his favourite fleece blanket around him before going to sit with Rachel and the girls. Jack tilted his head back and breathed the crisp air in deeply, revelling in the way the cold bit into his sinuses. He'd been behaving, had made remarkable progress in the laughable excuse for therapy sessions Met Gen boasted. They got to see Rachel and the girls daily. They weren't going to pretend it wasn't a struggle, trying to merge into one personality without alerting anyone, keeping their temper when provoked by anything, but it was worth it.

They were out of that wheelchair and out of that straightjacket, the bullet wound was healing nicely, Janet and Susie had been moved into Rachel's room and Janet's therapy was also going well, he heard. Dealing with the heroin was easier than the rapes she'd survived. Jack worried about her. He wondered if she hated him for what he'd let happen.

So, essentially, all they were waiting for was for Rachel to give birth. The doctors were expecting it to happen any day, any moment. Jack was hoping she lasted another week and a half, lasted until she was thirty-seven weeks along and full-term. He didn't think that would happen, not with all Rachel had been through, but he hoped.

"He's right there, gentlemen."

Jack raised his head and watched two black-suited men in black sunglasses follow a middle-aged nurse toward him. He vaguely recognised her, but it was the federal agents that held his attention. He kept his hands clasped loosely between his knees as he tilted his head to the side and watched them.

"What can I do for you?" Jack asked.

"Jack Dawes?" He nodded and didn't roll his eyes. "I'm Special Agent Byers, this is Special Agent Mencina, FBI. We've been sent to inform you that, due to your involvement in taking down the mob in Gotham City, the FBI has decided to . . . overlook the fact that you deliberately withheld potentially vital information from us."

Jack blinked and mouthed the words as he repeated the agent's last sentence. He found it a little wordy, but otherwise understandable. "So, what, I'm not in trouble?"

"Not with the Sergeant Major of the Marines on your side." Mencina didn't sound please and Jack just shrugged, not smiling. "No, the Pentagon's decision is that you giving us the information on Moskowitz and Bentley would have done more harm than good, and proceeding the way you did, you managed zero civilian casualties and a complete destructuring of several major crime families."

"Do I get to go home with my family?"

"That will be up to the Barnstable County courts," Byers told him. "They'll decide what to do with the minors in your care."

Jack glanced toward Rachel's window. "My wife can take care of them; she's got a good support system. I don't want those girls in foster care."

"That's not our decision." The agents stood there for a moment or two longer before leaving, their errand finished.

Jack yawned and leaned back again, looking up at the blue sky and wondering how it could be so cold on such a clear day, wondering why it wasn't raining or snowing. He didn't want it to do either; his baby girl might get sick, on top of being premature. Metropolis simply had odd weather patterns.

"Are you visiting a family member?" the nurse asked as she returned.

He looked at her from barely-opened eyes and shrugged. "My wife's on bed-rest. She's going to have a baby."

He got a grandmotherly smile as she tucked a strand of greying brown hair behind her ear. "Congratulations. Your first?"

Jack sighed again and nodded. "Yeah. A girl."

"I'm sure she'll be just fine. This is a good hospital; we have the best obstetricians in the state working here. May I . . . ?" Jack turned his head slightly when she gestured next to him and shrugged. He didn't care if this woman sat next to him. He was practicing being calm, and the other one was mildly interested in her. "My son and daughter-in-law are having a baby, soon. My son and I don't talk, but . . . it'll be my first grandchild."

It took a moment before social niceties kicked in and Jack mumbled an awkward congratulations. "Soon?"

"Oh, any time, now." The corners of her brown eyes wrinkled with a smile and she was naggingly familiar, so Jack raised his head to get a better look at the woman. She couldn't have been more than twenty years older than him, maybe less. "I work in Paediatrics. Maybe I'll see your little girl."

He wasn't sure if he wanted that or not. "Oh. I'm Jack."

"Noelle," she replied after a moment's hesitation. Then she smiled again and stood up. "Are you all right out here? Warm enough?"

"I'm fine," he muttered. "Thanks."

"Well, don't stay out too long. You'll catch your death of a cold."

Jack snorted to himself as she got up and walked back into the hospital, then looked up at Rachel's window again. He could only visit her at specific times. He also needed to hobble his way to his stupid therapy session; at least Doctor Morgenson had insisted on being a part of the group love-fest. The good doctor was just about the only thing that kept Jack in that horrible room, talking to those idiotic lunatics, the doctor and his girls.

The good thing, Jack supposed as he got up and walked toward a different door while the guards waiting there watched him, was that he wasn't constantly fighting to stay in control any more, and therefore wasn't in need of as many drugs as usual.

***

"How are we, ladies? Everyone's still with us, I see."

Doctor Curnen was too chipper, Rachel felt. Then again, she herself had been up half the night, her stomach aching. She'd tossed and turned, but hadn't been able to get back to sleep and wasn't happy about it. Jack's arms were around her, his fingers twisting in hers as he helped her to sit down on one of the available couches. Completely ignoring the one guard sent in with them, he carefully arranged himself behind Rachel, resting his chin on her shoulder after kissing her neck and crossing her arms over her chest, his own arms over them. Rachel had been surprised that the other mothers had agreed to let him in the class with her, but his attention to her and the guard's presence had obviously put them at ease. Not that she'd been making friends, exactly.

"Are you all right?" Jack whispered in her ear. Doctor Curnen glanced at him, but kept talking about the day's agenda.

"Just a headache," Rachel whispered back. The Braxton-Hicks contractions had been increasing for the past day or so, but they weren't painful.

She was laying on her side on the floor, propped up against Jack as the doctor led them through what to expect during the delivery, when she felt something run down the side of her buttock. Jack helped her move onto her back and she used that to put her hand on the floor beneath her as she moved, and it came away wet. Her eyes got big and she glanced up at Jack quickly, but he hadn't noticed anything. Rachel swallowed and returned the slight smile he gave her before looking around for the doctor. She didn't want to alarm Jack. He was having a hard enough time as it was. She didn't need to spring labour on him like this, but . . .

"Rachel? Are you all right?"

She jumped and looked to the left as Doctor Curnen raised an eyebrow at her. "Uhm, I'm fine."

The doctor walked around the small group, still talking, until she was opposite Rachel and smiled as she looked the expectant mother over carefully. Her eyebrow went up again and she nodded to herself. She took out a notepad and wrote on it, then gave it to an attending nurse. The woman read it and slipped out the door. Oh, Doctor Curnen was good. Jack didn't pay any more attention to the doctor that entered the room a few minutes later than he did anyone coming in, looking the man over and then returning his attention to Rachel. Doctor Curnen introduced him as the head obstetrician and he made his rounds, talking quietly with each couple for a minute or so until he got to Jack and Rachel.

"How are you holding up?" he asked gently. He was looking at Jack, but glanced down just long enough to meet Rachel's gaze.

She nodded and smiled while Jack answered. "Uhm, fine. I guess." He watched the doctor take Rachel's pulse, just like he'd done with the other women. It was harmless.

When he turned to Doctor Curnen, Rachel looked up at Jack and he immediately smiled down at her. He was grateful to have any time with her, and looking at her let Doctor Brooks give any message he needed to Curnen.

Which was to end the class. "All right, I'm sorry to cut class short today; there are a few things I need to get done that can't wait. If it's convenient, we can pick up again in, say, half an hour?"

Brooks handed Rachel a towel while Jack was looking at Doctor Curnen, then helped Jack help Rachel to stand while the rest of the couples answered the woman. "We have an exam scheduled for later this afternoon, but we can do it right now," he said casually. "Mr. Dawes, if you'd like to sit in on it?" Jack nodded eagerly while he hugged Rachel. "Good. Right this way . . . I think we'll use a wheelchair, Mrs. Dawes."

There was one waiting outside the classroom and Rachel sank into it gratefully, then looked at Jack again and smiled. He breathed a small sigh of relief. "Thank you, Doctor."

"No problem. Betty . . ." A young nurse stepped over to push the wheelchair while Brooks flipped through Rachel's medical chart. "How have your contractions been?"

"I've had a lot, but they don't hurt. Uhm, six or seven an hour since . . . yesterday. I woke up last night really sore, and I couldn't get back to sleep."

"Is everything all right?" Jack broke in nervously.

"Of course," Brooks said as he ushered them in to the elevator. "We'll be there in a moment."

"Do you want me to get rid of my scars?" Jack asked quietly.

Rachel looked up in surprise. "Your scars?" He nodded and she pursed her lips. "I don't mind them; I hardly even notice them. But other people see them and associate them with the Joker, with everything you used to do." She took his hand and kissed it, holding it was the nurse wheeled her down a new hallway. Her panties were feeling wetter by the minute. "It depends on what message you want to send to other people."

"Oh. Are you in labour?"

She blinked up at him before smiling, and Brooks answered. "Mrs. Dawes' water broke, is all. There's nothing to worry about."

Jack's grip on her hand tightened, though. "Thirty-six weeks."

"Which is close enough to full-term that there should be very few problems, Mr. Dawes. Don't worry; I have years of experience with preterm births. In spite of the circumstances, Mrs. Dawes is in excellent health and I don't expect to keep your baby in the NICU more than a week."

Rachel saw the signs of stress that no one else saw and kissed his hand. "I'm all right, Jack. I'm fine."

"Does it hurt?"

He was closing in on himself to keep any budding hysteria at bay. Rachel loved him. "Not yet, but I'm sure it will soon enough. I love you, Jack."

He swallowed sharply as they entered another room. "Me, too."

"Mr. Dawes, if you could step over there, Mitchell will give you a rundown of what's going to happen. Betty's going to help Rachel into a new gown and we're going to see how much she's dilated in the next room, first."

Mitchell picked up from there and kept up a running commentary, his low voice soothing to Rachel, at least. Rachel was gripped with the sudden urge to see her mother. Her mother would know what to do, how to comfort Jack. She cleared her throat after a few minutes.

"Doctor . . . Is it all right . . . I mean, Jack and my mother? She knows how to keep him calm."

Brooks paused and looked through the door's window to where Jack was pacing, wringing his hands. Then he smiled and nodded. "I think that would be fine. Betty, get in touch with Mrs. Dawes' mother and let her know she's needed here. I'd like to keep as few people in the room as possible," he explained to Rachel. "I understand your current youngest wanted to watch the birth?"

"She's not ours; not yet," Rachel corrected him as her heart started to speed up. "But yes, Susie wanted to watch."

"We'll see how it goes. She might be able to be here for the very beginning."

"If a crazy Asian twink tries to get in, kick him out," Jack said as Mitchell let him into the room. "She's not really his wife."

Brooks turned a startled look on Rachel and she shook her head as she laughed. "Our friend Hideki. Doctor Brooks says only you and Mom can be in the room," she assured Jack. "Maybe Susie, for the beginning."

"Morgenson gave her some IQ test and says she scored off the charts," Jack blurted out. He sat next to the head of the bed when Mitchell gave him a chair and took Rachel's hand. "Told you the kid's a genius. Bona-fide. Why's she wanna watch?"

"Because children are curious about everything, and she wants to be the first to see Ava. Plus we never told her it was going to be messy."

Jack paused and then picked up a completely different topic, stroking Rachel's hair back from her forehead compulsively until Bethany was ushered into the room and shooed him off.

"You'll make her go bald," the older woman said affectionately.

"Four years of constant sex and she's not bald _there_ yet, so I doubt that's true," he snapped back. "How long will this take?"

"You have somewhere else to be?"

He paused and then flushed, leaning over the bed to cradle Rachel's upper body in his arms. "Sorry."

"It's all right," Brooks said from the business end of the bed. "One centimetre dilated; the contractions you've been feeling have been actual contractions, by the way. They'll start to get painful soon."

"You popped out so fast the doctor almost dropped you," Bethany told her daughter cheerfully. "I expect Ava will be much the same."

"Don't you dare drop my daughter," Jack began heatedly.

"Oh, knock it off. He knows what he's doing." Bethany pushed Jack down into his chair and ran her fingers through his hair as Rachel gasped.

"Oh, Christ, that hurts!" she panted after a minute or so.

Bethany's hand on Jack's shoulder had kept him from jumping up. "Like a menstrual cramp?" Brooks asked. Rachel nodded. "Not a problem. Don't push. We're really just waiting at this point. I think we can let your little girl in for a while."

Rachel wanted to tell her mother that she was scared, but the look on Jack's face said enough. He was worried about her and Ava both and didn't need her own fears added to that concern. She swallowed and tried to get comfortable.

"Janet's at the hotel," she told Jack. He looked at her in surprise. "Dick's really mad that you shot him."

"Yeah, well, didn't need him trying to be a hero and getting anyone hurt. Didn't trust him."

Rachel wasn't sure how she managed to keep Jack occupied for the next hour, even with Susie's entrance and her mother's help. She'd been up and walking around with him until that started to hurt, then laying down and letting him rub her shoulders while her mother rubbed her feet. He was calmed down by the time Charles arrived to take Susie back to the hotel. The little girl whined for a moment, but didn't put up too much of a fuss, and then her contractions decided they meant business. Doctor Brooks had her lay back down and then Bethany was on Rachel's left and Jack was on her right, and Rachel was forgetting everything she'd been told in the two childbirth classes she'd attended at Metropolis General, curling in on herself and clenching her teeth with each contraction.

She wasn't aware that Charles had bullied her way back into the delivery room until the Marine was gripping her shoulders and murmuring instructions in her ear in the tone of voice that had _Jack_ obeying her without a thought, much less Rachel. When the latest contraction let her go, Rachel lay back and panted while Charles grabbed Jack's ear.

"Look, you moron, would you be a good dom to your sub, already? _Tell her to relax_. This isn't going to go any smoother if she keeps tensing up like that."

Jack hissed and then looked down at Rachel, who was looking back at him while she caught her breath. He half-stood and leaned over her, one hand cupping her cheek as he kissed her firmly.

"Calm down," he murmured in the voice _she_ very rarely disobeyed. The other part of him was glad to be concentrating on her face, instead of the messy bits. Rachel's eyes flew open and Jack kissed her again. "It's all right, Rachel. Calm down. Relax." They had three to five minutes before the next contraction and he talked to her the whole time, smiling at her, distracting her from the pain as best he could.

Rachel sucked in her breath and started to tense for another contraction, and Jack kissed her again. "Piss off," she muttered through clenched teeth as the doctor urged her to bear down. "Don't touch me. Keep talking to me," she gasped out a minute later.

Jack drew back until the doctor reassured him that very few women wanted to be touched while they were in labour, then talked to her quietly with the occasional input from Charles or her mother and Rachel clung to his hand, or to Charles' or her mother's when he needed to sit down. The pattern repeated endlessly, it seemed, only interrupted when Brooks started telling Rachel, who had started yelling and swearing a while ago, to push. In truth, when Jack glanced up at the clock, almost nine hours had passed. Close enough to endless. He smiled down at Rachel and kissed at her nose while he transferred her grip to his other hand, shaking the now-free one in the hopes of getting the circulation flowing again.

"Almost there," the doctor told them.

"Can I ground her for this?" Jack asked softly. Rachel rolled her eyes at him and whimpered with pain. He dabbed a damp washcloth against her forehead and that prompted a smile. "I'm going to lose the rest of my hair from this."

"Vain," Rachel gasped out.

Jack shrugged, his heart skipping a beat, again, when she cried out in pain. Her grip on his hand tightened and he squeezed back. "It's okay, baby, it's okay. We're almost done." He was going to faint. Maybe it was lack of food. Rachel suddenly relaxed in his arms, though, and he patted her cheek urgently. "Rachel? Rachel!"

"I'm okay," she whispered. "Ava . . ."

"What?" Jack whipped his head around in time to see the doctor lift up a small bundle of white blanket and carry it to a nearby table. "Ava!" His heart felt like it would burst out of his chest.

"She's all right," Doctor Brooks said over his shoulder. Charles held Jack back until the doctor came over to them, holding a tiny thing in his arms. "We need to get her to the NICU, but this is your daughter."

Jack stared at the tightly-scrunched, bluish face and thought his heart might actually stop. "That . . . She's . . ."

"In need of the NICU," the doctor said firmly. Rachel was craning her neck to see her child and tears filled her eyes as Brooks turned and left.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

Jack sat down and looked at her in confusion. "What for? He said she'll be fine."

"I didn't want her to be early."

He paused, then slowly pulled Rachel into his arms again and rocked her as she cried. The nurses were still doing something at the other end of the bed but he ignored them, stroking Rachel's hair and kissing her.

"It's fine," he whispered in her ear, "she'll be fine. You're both okay and that's all I care about."

Rachel cried herself to sleep in his arms.

***

They were whispering behind him.

"What's he doing?"

"Counting."

"He's been here an hour."

"He says she might have grown more fingers or toes while he wasn't looking."

"Doesn't that entail him _not looking_, though?"

Jack squinted and trailed his finger just over Ava's left foot. "Eight, nine . . . ten. Good." He'd been in every day since her birth to just stand there and look at her, look at the tiny little thing he and Rachel had made together. Rachel was sitting behind him and twisting a bit of her skirt in her fingers. She'd been mortified at how Ava had looked at first, bursting into tears and declaring that Ava was ugly. Jack still couldn't find fault with the infant, though. She was, he thought, absolutely perfect and today Brooks had said Rachel could try breastfeeding her.

"Still ten of each?" the doctor himself asked as he walked up.

"For now," Jack replied happily. Even his impending incarceration in Arkham wasn't dulling his mood. "Can I hold her today?"

Brooks' expression was the same as the other days Jack had asked, and he didn't push as the doctor lifted his girl out of her crib-thing and carried her over to Rachel. Jack stayed by his side and watched everything.

Rachel looked up and swallowed as she was handed her baby for the first time. She'd been in with Jack to see her, of course, and it had helped that the hotel Bruce had put them all up in was only a block away from the hospital, but it was still hard to leave each day without Ava. Jack had been allowed to stay only until Ava was sent home, then she'd be losing her husband.

She couldn't think about that right now. She shivered and, under Charles' supervision, moved the flap of her nursing bra/camisole aside and patiently offered Ava her nipple. It took a couple of tries and Rachel was ready to start crying again, but with Jack humming soothingly in her ear and Charles encouraging her, she held back tears until Ava had finally latched on and started suckling. Then Rachel _did_ start to cry softly as she cradled Ava gently against her, stroking the soft cheek her little girl presented to her.

"She's beautiful," Rachel hiccupped. It hurt to nurse at the moment, but she wouldn't have bottle-fed the baby for anything.

"I told you so," was Jack's pleased murmur. "She's perfect."

"She won't eat a lot right now," Charles said quietly. "It's all right if she falls asleep."

A few minutes later the preemie did just that, needing to be woken up just enough for a short burping session. Then Doctor Brooks was taking her back and Rachel protested.

"Let Jack hold her. Jack hasn't held her."

Brooks frowned and looked at the armed guard standing beside Jack. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Dawes, according to policy ---"

"Policy my stockings," Noelle snapped at him as she stomped up. "Melvin Brooks, you give that man his daughter. Do you know what that man went through for his family?"

"Look, Nurse McGallagher, it's not my decision ---"

"Then you're a terrible person," she cut him off. "Rachel, Jack can hold his daughter."

She turned to scold the doctor some more and Jack stared at her, something in his mind clicking at her last name in a way he wanted nothing to do with and he was just about to open his mouth and launch himself toward the woman when something small and warm was pushed into his arms. Jack looked down in shock and his arms curled automatically around Ava so she wouldn't fall, his baby girl yawning a little in her sleep. He sat back in his chair and held perfectly still, everything in his life swept away and replaced by wonder as small eyes opened and looked up at him blearily.

"I was right," Rachel murmured. Jack could only grunt as Ava went back to sleep in his arms. "You _do_ look handsome holding our baby."

Jack leaned down, very gently, and pressed a kiss to Ava's forehead.

***

"There you are!" Tom called from the porch. "What took you so long?"

"Flew there, drove back," Jack called back.

"Yeah, yeah, come in and let us see her!" He waved idly at the Gotham police car in the driveway. "They're here to take you away, but they'll let you get Rachel and the girls settled, first."

"Tact, Tom, tact," Helna said as she held open the screen door.

"I'm friends with Jack; it wore off." He pulled his friend into a half-hug. "It'll be all right, man," he murmured in Jack's ear. "We'll get you back. Otherwise I have to help that Edward Nashton guy write his new novel. He just moved to town, and I hate mystery novels."

"You better get me back," Jack muttered as he set Ava's car seat down by the coffee table and was pulled into a hug by Helna. "Hey."

"You . . . You . . ."

Jack ignored her blubbering and swooped Mitzi up, giving her a kiss on the cheek before blowing a raspberry. She squealed with laughter and then he knelt and set her down.

"This is Ava, Mitzi. Be gentle; she's very small. Remember? I told you about Ava. She's a little early, isn't she?"

The toddler looked up at Jack with big eyes, then down at the sleeping baby. "Ava?" Jack nodded with a grin. Mitzi giggled and then leaned over the car seat, kissing Ava's cheek.

Jack laughed. "Hey, Tom, check it out. Your daughter's a dyke."

He got a toe in his backside. "She is not, Jack, she's just being friendly."

"Whatever; I've got great gaydar, and Mitzi's a dyke." He leaned down and took Ava out of the seat, kissing her gently and trying not to cling as he turned to Rachel. "Well."

Tom and Helna had packed his bags. Janet was standing in the doorway to the kitchen and Susie had just discovered the kitten Jack had bought for her, squealing over the small tabby.

Jack turned to her. "Hey, Susie, give me a hug and kiss. I have to go away for a while."

"How long?" she asked as she hugged him.

Jack squeezed her tight and smiled when she kissed his nose, returning it with a kiss on her cheek. "I don't know. Not --- not everyone thinks I'm a hero. I'll be back as soon as I can. You just, just be a good big sister to Ava, all right? Do what Rachel says, and help Janet. Take care of them for me, all right?" There was a lump in his throat that he was having difficulty talking past.

"Daddy . . ." Susie looked at the two officers outside the window and wiped tears away. "Is it because I shot those men?"

Jack was going to start crying. "No, baby, it's not because of you at all. _I'm_ in trouble, not you. Never you." He stood up and looked at Janet, who had tears running down her face. "I'm sorry." She turned and ran to her bedroom, sobbing. Finally Jack turned to Rachel and walked with her out onto the porch. He handed Ava to her after another kiss for his baby, and the infant's cheek was wet when Rachel took her. "Rachel ---"

His voice broke and Jack leaned down, burying his face in the crook of Rachel's neck as they both sobbed. He kept apologising, promising her it was only until after the criminal trial, and Rachel pretended they both believed that.

After a few minutes Jack draw back and wiped his face off on his sleeve, then kissed Rachel firmly.

"I love you," he whispered. "I love all of you. Don't --- don't forget that."

"We won't," she told him, then Jack had to turn away or risk refusing to go at all. He turned to the two officers and closed his eyes as he nodded, letting them cuff him and read him his rights as they led him to the police car.

It was a long ride back to Arkham Asylum.

****

**A/N:** The end. Thank you, everyone, for sticking with me this long. I'll put up a link to the next story in the arc when I start posting it. I love you, my review monkeys!


	33. Chapter 33

Oaky, the sequel's up! Updates won't be regular, but I'll try for at least two chapters a month. I hope you all enjoy _Everything In Between_ as much as you've enjoyed _Speak_ and _Sing_!

.net/s/4951324/1/Everything_In_Between


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